Consequences
by Katey123
Summary: Wedged between a rock and a hard place, Sakura has no choice but to grit her teeth and heal the Akatsuki assassin; Deidara. Drawn in by his mysterious, enigmatic personality her morals become compromised, unaware that the consequences of her actions will threaten to destroy all that she holds dear. Can their fledgling relationship prevail in the face of such hostility?
1. A Healer and her Patient

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto

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**Chapter 1: A Healer and her Patient**

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An unusually chill wind swept across the desert, whipping up stinging sand clouds to threaten unwary travellers passing through its domain. A lone ninja turned up the collar of her seldom-used cloak as she approached the village. The sun had set several hours ago and with it the remaining warmth the desert had to offer. The shinobi plodded onwards, battling against the fierce wind which was common in these parts. Small decidedly feminine fingers wrapped the folds of her dark cloak even more tightly around her form as she reached the parameter of the village.

It was hard to discern the colour of the cloak from a distance but even those that lacked keen eyes could discern that it was plain and unadorned – in other words, this traveller was unlikely to be one of the Akatsuki. Besides, the watchers on the wall had never heard of a female Akatsuki member; it was obvious from the cut of the cloak that a distinctly feminine form lay beneath its shrouds.

Even so, the watchers on the wall tightened their grip on their weapons. There were many people that travelled the desert at night and not all of them friendly. It would be sheer irony if the Kazekage were to be assassinated now, after all their precautions.

Of all this, Sakura was only vaguely aware of as she approached the Sunagakure, clutching her scroll like it was a life-line. In a way she supposed it was. The sand shinobi would be on red alert after the attempt on Gaara's life and this scroll was the only proof of who she was. Of course she was nervous.

This was the first time the pink-haired kunoichi had travelled such a distance alone but that wasn't what bothered her. It was the mission itself. To be perfectly honest, she would have refused the mission point-blank if the Hokage hadn't asked her personally. Not for the first time she wondered if she could do this. But she had to. She took a deep breath, willing herself to calm her erratic thoughts.

As she neared the wall, the sheer number of shinobi that diligently guarded it became painfully obvious. She had no reason to be afraid, she told herself as adrenaline began to course through her veins. She clutched the scroll from her shishou tightly and wished that she could believe that. She knew that if she was considered a threat, she would be eliminated immediately.

Normally, Sakura would stroll right up to the gate and have her identity confirmed there but these were exceptional circumstances. To approach the gate now would be nothing short of suicide. A commander barked instructions at her to remain where she was as a few shinobi slid off the wall and came to confirm her identity and business in the Suna. She threw back the hood of her cloak and waited in anticipation with shimmering jade eyes as the ninja neared her spot.

Sakura could almost feel the tension emanating from the silent shinobi. No one was taking any chances today. But who could blame them?

She could see the faces of those sent to investigate her clearly now. Aside from their tanned skin, the only similarities between them were the dark shading under their eyes, the tightness around their lips and eyes and the cautious way in which they moved. They had the look of men that had not slept for a few nights.

Sakura cast her mind back to three days ago upon receiving the urgent message in Tsunade's office.

_Tsunade looked up from her massive desk, lacing her hands together as she did so and surveyed her trusted student carefully._

_"You sent for me, shishou?" Sakura began questioningly._

_"Yes, I did" Tsunade confirmed, her tone unusually serious. "This is an emergency message from the Sand" she motioned towards the partially unfurled scroll on her desk. "It requests you, Sakura in particular."_

_"I don't understand. What would the Sand want with me?" Sakura asked her vibrant eyes alight with confusion._

_"Earlier tonight, a member of the Akatsuki infiltrated their village. He fought with the Kazekage and is now being detained there. The village require the assistance of Konoha ninja to help track down the remaining Akatsuki member as after all, the Akatsuki are our forte."_

_Tsunade's brow knit together in annoyance. This scroll wasn't the first of a series of disturbing events that had reached her ears in the past week or so. The Akatsuki were on the move once more and the incident in the Sand was just the latest of these events._

_"Sakura, I wouldn't usually ask this of you – given the current situation – but I would like you to go to the Sand village prior to the other ninja. As the message suggests, they clearly requested you for your medical ninjutsu. Backup will be sent as soon as I can assemble a team. Any other information on the situation you discover you can report back to me"._

_"Isn't there anyone else?" Sakura asked urgently. "Healing that member of the Akatsuki for their questioning; that's what they're asking me to do isn't it?"_

_Tsunade raised her hand. "Sakura, I-"_

_"I can't betray Naruto like this! You of all people should know that!" It was almost impossible to keep the anguish out of her jade eyes._

_"I know, but there is no other way!" Tsunade replied with some authority. "If you do not go then Konoha will have no idea of what is going on there. Sakura, I don't want to force you on this, but it's very important"._

_Sakura sighed in defeat and ran her fingers distractedly through her pink hair._

_"What about Kakashi-sensei and Naruto?" she asked. "Don't they know of this?"_

_"They will be informed but for now I would like you to go alone. Be ready to leave in half an hour. Reinforcements will be sent tomorrow morning"._

_"Shishou are you sure-"_

_"Sakura" Tsunade replied, her tone filled with a note of finality which left no room to argue. "I admit that the request is suspicious at best but this is the best decision I could make in the circumstances. Please trust my judgement"._

_"Y-Yes! Of course" Sakura apologised before making her way to the exit._

_She did not hear Tsunade sigh to herself "Let's hope it was the right one"._

The three figures strode off through the dusty streets, leaving sandy footprints in their wake. The buildings towered over them to dizzying heights. They were quite unlike anything Sakura had ever seen yet she didn't spare them even a single thought as she followed her two shinobi escorts deep into the heart of the village.

"This way!" A faceless sand shinobi motioned to the pink-haired kunoichi as she entered the infirmary. Hurriedly, she was led down a dimly lit corridor to the room at the end on the right. Before entering, the nameless shinobi pulled her to one side.

"His condition is critical. He needs urgent attention right away". The sand shinobi informed the konoha medic. "You have been informed of the situation?"

She nodded an affirmative. She knew what to do.

"As a precautionary measure two guards will be posted outside the room at all times" he continued. "Though they should not be necessary providing he is not healed more than is required".

She entered the room alone. A lone light bulb flickered to life as Sakura took in her surroundings. It was a far cry from the bright, clinically clean rooms she was used to working in. Her hand strayed over the metal medical tray – upon which bandages, medicines and needles lay – as she edged closer to the dark shape lying on the bed in the centre of the room.

"I shouldn't be here…" The pink-haired ninja spoke to the room at large.

This was not a new thought. Questions of why she was here, why she was doing this, of why she was even considering this had bounced around her brain ever since she had accepted the mission three days ago. It was morally and ethically wrong in every sense! She should not have to do this! It felt like too much of a betrayal to Naruto.

Sakura's breath hitched as she neared the body on the bed. The situation seemed almost surreal. Here she was; Sakura, konoha medic and chunnin alone in a room with one of the notorious members of the Akatsuki! She gulped down any last vestiges of panic and crossed those last few paces to the bed. The Hokage was counting on her after all.

Her immediate reaction was surprise. The man lying unconscious on the bed was only a few years older than she was. She tried to ignore the unhealthy wheezing sound of his damaged lungs as she began to examine him.

At first glance, it was clear that the damage was indeed severe. An ordinary civilian could have said much the same. To put it simply, he looked like he'd been through hell and back again. His long blonde hair covered half his face while the other half was covered in bruises and congealed blood. His left eyelid had turned an interesting shade of purple and his lips were split in two places.

Automatically Sakura turned her attention to his torso. His skin was so bruised it had taken on an ugly mottled hue except for where a deep wound had penetrated his left shoulder. Upon further examination, the medic discovered a shallower but potentially fatal wound in his right side. Both wounds had been bandaged but with little care.

It was then that Sakura began to wonder if it would even bother them if the man died.

Still, it was important to ascertain the extent of the damage and Sakura was not one to let a patient die on her that easily no matter who they were. Akatsuki or no Akatsuki, she would treat him the same as any other patient, albeit that she could not heal him fully. She wasn't quite sure of her feelings on the interrogation of the wanted criminal when interrogation meant beating the prisoner within an inch of his life, healing the worst of his wounds and then hauling him in again for another round, especially when she was the one doing the healing. It was rare that the prisoners lasted very long.

Sakura reached into the familiar swirl of her chakra and began to channel it from her hands into the Akatsuki member's chest. She probed gently, searching to discover the degree of his internal injuries as she placed her hands at various points on his torso. The level of damage was what she expected. His injuries were not quite as severe as the sand shinobi had implied but were dangerous nonetheless and needed to be treated before they became infected.

With a sigh, she completed the diagnosis and then focused on healing his shoulder and side. It was a fairly straightforward task and Sakura's mind began to wander. It was only then that she began to realise just how well-defined his chest was, the silkiness of his hair, and his distinct jaw line –

_No! What the hell am I thinking?_ She jerked herself out of her reverie – in which she was contemplating what the exact colour of his eyes was – and stopped the flow of chakra. What the hell was wrong with her? She'd seen plenty of male chests before, being a medic, but she'd never had this problem before!

"Focus Sakura, focus!" she said, furious with her disobedient thoughts. She was almost done anyway. She couldn't risk healing his injuries any more or he could become dangerous.

She increased her pace, eager to leave the room and the disturbing young man that lay there. Methodically she tidied the equipment away and then made to leave the room.

"You needn't have bothered, yeah".

Sakura spun round, expecting an attack but then relaxed when she saw his dark form lying on the bed. In an instant she had abandoned all logic at the thought of facing an Akatsuki alone. The fact that he could barely stand, that he had chakra bands on his wrists, that he was in no fit condition to fight – none of that had registered in her mind. She had acted on purely on impulse.

"Oh believe me, I wouldn't have". Sakura couldn't quite believe who she was talking to. "Try not to move too much. Your wounds aren't fully healed yet."

As she exited the room he called after her "What's your name?"

She paused with her hand on the handle.

"It's Sakura".

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**Please review! :)**


	2. Light and Dark

**A/N: **This is the completely rewritten version of chapter two. You'll find a lot of changes; some new scenes and some you'll recognise but different than before. This rewrite was very time-consuming and at times difficult but I thought that of all the chapters, chapters two, three and four were the worst. I've rewritten them because the pace of the beginning of the story was too fast and there was not enough DeiSaku. Anyway, here it is. I hope you enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

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**Chapter 2: Light and Dark**

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Deidara opened his eyes and immediately winced. It was early morning and pure, unadulterated light flooded in through the barred window of his cell, waking the wanted criminal from his uneasy sleep. Automatically, he raised his hand to shield his eyes from the unforgiving desert sun as he forced himself into a sitting position and waited for the afterimage to fade.

When his vision cleared, he was able to ascertain that – just as he suspected – he was confined within a room with a distinctly prison-like feel. Ominous iron bars framed the window as if to remind the prisoner that any attempt to escape was likely to end badly – at least in his condition. His icy blue eyes roved around the room a second time, taking in the sorry sight. The walls were moist – which explained the strong smell of damp – and appeared to be an odd shade of brown. Deidara rather thought it might have been orange once upon a time but he was reluctant to test that theory as it involved scraping away a portion of the mass of dirt and grime that had accumulated there over the years. He frowned in disgust. Aside from the bed he was sitting on and a medical tray in the corner, the room was empty.

"This kind of place deserves to be blown up, yeah," he muttered to himself as he gingerly got to his feet, feeling every ache and bruise on his body.

The short walk to the window was painful and definitely not worth the trouble. Peering between the bars, he was able to catch a glimpse of the vast network of buildings stretched across in every direction underneath a bright blue sky. Though he'd suspected he was probably in the heart of the sand village, it was different to actually knowing it. Deidara scowled at the sight.

He crossed back over to the bed and sank onto it gratefully, ignoring the springs' squeak of protest. That medic – Sakura – had partially healed his wounds last night but they still pained him a great deal whenever he moved. He had a fairly good idea of why he was healed, of why he was still alive. They were going to question him about the Akatsuki. He knew it.

"Just perfect, yeah" He sighed, resigning himself to a day of solitude – or at least until they interrogated him.

Being confined did not agree with the Akatsuki member. After he had exhausted the number of ways he could blow up the village – his favourite involving his ultimate jutsu – Deidara began to wish he had not made that fatal mistake which cost him the entire fight.

_Why did Sasori have to be right, damn it? _

He punched the floor angrily and winced as his knuckles cracked. That one small bag of clay _hadn't_ been enough. He had seriously underestimated the Jinchuuriki and now he was stuck here and unable to do a single thing about it!

The sound of boots outside alerted him to the presence of four sand shinobi who upon opening the door forced him roughly to his feet. Handcuffs were clamped around his wrists and he was frogmarched from the room, down the corridor and into the interrogation room, though perhaps torture chamber would be a more apt name he thought wryly.

Rough hands forced him into the dimly lit room and chained him to an ominous chair at the centre. A single lightbulb swung precariously above his head, creating a pool of light around him and leaving the rest of the room in shadows.

Deidara refused to look up, opting to stare at the floor instead. His hair hung low over his face, forming a blond curtain that obscured his features. All there was left for him to do was wait, wait for the questioning to begin. He didn't have to wait very long. A pair of shiny black boots walked towards him and stopped scarcely a metre in front of him.

"What is your name?" The voice was harsh and cold, a typical interrogators voice. Deidara knew the type.

No answer.

"Why are you here?" The voice continued in the same even tone.

Still no response was visible from the prisoner. After the third, fourth and even fifth question were received in a similar fashion the interrogator began to lose patience.

"Where is the Akatsuki base?"

His only reply was silence. In a few short steps the man covered the distance between them. His fist connected with the Akatsuki member's cheek.

"Let's try that again" The man snarled as Deidara spat out blood. "Where are they?"

It was not long until he was riddled with pain. Every question he refused to answer was another blow to the head, another kick in the gut or even a broken bone. But for all their attempts not even a whisper escaped from his lips. As much as he hated the Akatsuki, revealing their secrets would not be to his advantage. On the off-chance that they did think him worth saving, they would not thank him for his lack of loyalty and answering the Suna's questions would only serve to shorten his life.

_I will not give in_, he thought furiously as blood seeped down his chest. _I will not cooperate. _

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"Sakura!" A few heads nearby swivelled in the direction of the shout but the words were lost in amongst a cacophony of voices haggling with vendors, admiring the many wares for sale or scolding unruly children for having wandered off again. It was market day and the little narrow streets were practically heaving with all manner of people determined to get their shopping done before they day wore out. Except for one pink-haired kunoichi that meandered through the sea of stalls bedecked in lime green, sunflower yellow, tomato red or royal blue, an overwhelmed expression upon her face. It was nothing like she'd ever seen before.

"Sakura!" The voice called a little louder this time as its owner squeezed past a couple of angry vendors squabbling over whose fault it was that an entire cart of melons had fallen over. The blonde-haired girl skipped lightly over the contents of the cart which rolled and bounced across the dusty floor and into the sea of legs that were trying their best to avoid them. Eventually Temari's tanned hand sought Sakura's pale arm, finally getting her attention.

"Temari!" Sakura spun around in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

"Looking for you of course," the blonde grinned. "Someone needs to show you around this place and make sure you don't get lost".

"I won't get lo-" Sakura replied automatically but Temari wasn't listening.

"You have no idea how much of a nightmare it was to find you," she stated matter-of-factly. "Luckily you stand out from the crowd so that made my job easier but-"

"It's nice to see you too, Temari," Sakura joked, as she wisely refrained from commenting on the dark rings that had settled under the sandy-haired girl's eyes and the way her hands twisted unconsciously – a sure sign of worry. If she hazarded a guess she would bet that Temari's worry stemmed from the recent attack on her brother. Sakura wondered whether her decision to accept the mission would reflect on their friendship. With that thought in mind, she resolved never to bring up the matter unless it was necessary. After all, she couldn't afford to make enemies in Suna. It wasn't clear how long she'd be staying and the politics were quite lost on her.

More to break the silence than anything, Sakura pointed out a small stall in the corner, tucked away behind a large canopy sheltering freshly cured meat from the ferocity of the sun.

"What is that?" She asked curiously, eying some unfamiliar freshly cut plants hanging over the stall. Its table was crammed to bursting point with all manner of things; upon closer inspection Sakura recognised them to be various salves, pastes and crushed herbs which let off a sweet fragrant scent. She inhaled unconsciously, breathing in the fresh aromatic smell which permeated the air.

"Oh that," Temari replied off-handedly, following Sakura's line of sight. "That's just one of the herbal remedy stalls. There's a fair few dotted around the market. Pretty boring if you ask me".

"I've never seen plants like these," Sakura replied intrigued, already planning to inspect a few of the more exotic ones in her hotel room that evening.

"Excuse me," she asked the elderly woman who tended the stall. "I was wondering what you could tell me about this one?"

After some minutes of deliberation, several sprigs of herbs joined the bandages and food she'd bought earlier in the bag. Somehow the crowd had managed to swell to unimagined proportions in the time it took for her to purchase the herbs. The heat descended on the packed streets like a thermal blanket and Sakura began to feel uncomfortable.

"Let's go and find somewhere to sit in the shade" Temari suggested, sensing Sakura's discomfort. She grabbed Sakura by the arm and pulled her away from the crowd, leaving her no choice in the matter.

"You're a chuunin now, right?" Sakura asked conversationally as they weaved in and out of the sweltering crowd.

Temari focused on guiding them through the mass of bodies, shook her head. "Jonin" she corrected.

"Congratulations!" Sakura's parched lips broke into a smile.

It wasn't long before they found a small secluded café conveniently within easy walking distance of Sakura's hotel. It was rather small and quaint but the pink-haired kunoichi instantly took a liking to it. The walls were painted a burnt orange, decorated with sweeping, abstract desert paintings and a selection of round mahogany tables were spread evenly across the room.

"This is one of my favourite places," Temari informed Sakura as they both ordered their drinks – frappuccino and mocha – and sidled into two comfy chairs by the window.

"I can see why," Sakura agreed, sipping idly on her coffee and staring out of the window. It wasn't long before they were trading stories. Sakura listened with interest to everything Temari had to say about the last couple of years in the sand and what it was like now that Gaara was Kazekage. In return she described life in Konoha as Tsunade's apprentice.

All too soon it was time to leave and Sakura realised with slight trepidation, time for the healing session. The interrogators were bound to be finished with the interrogation for today. She relayed this to Temari who set down her third cup of coffee with a sigh.

"You don't have to come," Sakura reassured her with a smile. "I'm sure I'll be able to find the medical centre on my own".

"No, no it's okay," Temari replied. "I'm supposed to be training anyway. The training ground's in that direction anyway".

"Okay, well if you're sure..." Sakura trailed off; conscious of the fact that Temari's tone had taken on a dark edge at the very mention of the Akatsuki member. She was sure a confrontation would occur at some point. Temari would see it as her right to know why Sakura was healing such a man. Of why she would even consider such a mission, especially as her best friend was a Jinchuuriki. Perhaps it would be easier if Sakura had a clear notion of it herself. She was certain that the idea her shishou had asked her would not be an adequate response for the blonde-haired girl beside her.

"Well, see you later," Temari said in irked tones. They had arrived at the medical centre. Unlike the buildings surrounding it, the medical centre only had four floors. Nevertheless it stood out from the blocks that towered over it due to its blindingly white appearance. Perhaps it was because Sakura knew who lay confined somewhere within its depths but she thought it looked rather ominous and foreboding in the bright sunlight.

"Bye," she replied miserably as Temari stalked away, clearly disapproving of what Sakura was about to do. Well she couldn't say she blamed her.

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A steady flow of chakra – cool and comforting – spread through Sakura's hands and into the body of her patient. She watched as the familiar green glow engulfed one of his many injuries and mended the broken sinew and skin, much too slowly for her liking. Initially the precision and brutality of which the injuries had been inflicted had scared her. It appeared that the interrogators had not been satisfied until the Akatsuki member had reached the brink of death and Sakura had spent ten tense minutes administrating copious amounts of chakra to his critical areas, afraid he was not going to make it. She had breathed evenly again when his ragged breathing subsided.

The callousness of the sand shinobi irked her to no end and she picked several of her choicest swear words to describe them, not daring to contemplate what would have happened if the prisoner had died on the table. The blame would have been pinned on her of course. No matter how unjust the accusations were, Sakura knew that she would have a good chance of losing a trial in a foreign village with no one to back her up.

She glanced down automatically at the Akatsuki member and barely suppressed a sigh. Unlike last time he was conscious and Sakura had little difficulty deciding which she preferred. To her immense relief however, only a few words had been exchanged between them since the session began. It was difficult enough to concentrate as it was.

Although his posture suggested that he was relaxed, his muscles remained tense and coiled like that of a tiger about to spring. He did not trust her at all. She shrugged. The feeling was mutual. It had only been half an hour since she'd entered the medical centre but to Sakura it had felt much longer. She bent over to reach a roll of bandages from the medicine tray and sighed. This was starting to feel like a chore.

"You're from Konoha?" The man exclaimed, his cerulean eyes fixed quizzically upon the symbol inscribed on her headband. Sakura felt a slight twinge of annoyance at his words. She had hoped that their conversation would remain strictly medical but after that little comment she saw that it was not so. He must have caught sight of the symbol when she'd reached over to collect the bandages, she surmised, relieved that his eyes had refrained from roving over certain other parts of her body.

Seconds later she felt a completely unjustified stab of irritation. Did that mean he thought her unattractive? Inwardly, she laughed at herself. She did not consider herself above average in the looks department so why had it bothered her so much? She must have spent too long in the sun, she decided.

Sakura forced herself not to meet his gaze as her glowing fingertips brushed across his well-defined torso, healing a particularly large welt. Several moments later and she had made little headway on healing the stubborn wound. A tingling sensation niggled away at the base of her neck, making it impossible to concentrate. She could practically feel the piercing blue stare that watched her unwaveringly.

It was only then that she realised he was waiting for an answer. She forced her jaw to work. "Do I look like I'm from the Sand?" she replied sardonically, disapproval of the village and irritation at her situation unintentionally seeping into her tone.

"No I guess not". His expression was unreadable.

In an attempt to hide her discomfort she cast her mind around for another topic. Aside from the weather no brilliant ideas sprung to mind, after all what could she possibly have in common with the Akatsuki member? She decided that question was better left unanswered.

Her eyes focused on the bloodstained headband that obscured his forehead. The markings on the grey metal were difficult to make out amongst the dried blood and dirt but by squinting she was able to discern parts of the symbol. It could possibly be the symbol of Iwa. She knew better than to ask, however.

"Will you quit staring at me, yeah?" Her irate patient snarled, quite irritated at being the object of her attention for so long.

"I wasn't staring!" Sakura retorted loudly, instantly denying the notion that she had been staring at the Akatsuki member for any length of time. "I was further assessing your injuries; I need to know which ones require critical attention!"

"And assessing my injuries includes staring at my headband?" The S-Class criminal smirked, intending to rile her. It worked.

"I-," Sakura fought down a blush, mortified that she had been caught in the act. "I was curious," she admitted, deciding that to lie further would only serve to make her look foolish.

The blonde considered her for a moment, before leaning forward and closing the gap between them. Their faces were now mere inches apart. Sakura watched him warily. Her emerald eyes searched his sapphire ones curiously, unsure of what to expect.

"Would you like to know why I left Iwa?"

Sakura's breath caught in her throat. Of all the things he could have said to her, this was the least expected. She had absolutely no idea why he chose to confide in her of all people but she was also very conscious of the fact that it was considered almost her duty to gain any information she could from the captured criminal. At the same time came the realisation that she was genuinely interested in what he had to say.

She nodded.

A split second later Deidara threw back his head and laughed. It was filled with amused cold irony and sent little shivers of irritation down the medic's back. She refrained from punching him squarely in the gut only because his body couldn't take it in his state.

"Don't laugh at me," She hissed angrily. Really, after having to put up with the insufferable man and wasting precious hours of her day, you'd have thought he'd have been more grateful. She reflected briefly that it was just her luck to get stuck with the difficult patient – she'd had more than her fair share at home. Stubborn, difficult and annoyingly good-looking – that was what she had to put up with. She sighed.

"You're surprisingly naive, yeah," Deidara replied. A hint of a smirk lingered on his lips as he watched the medic amusedly.

"You don't even know me," Sakura replied defensively as she began sifting through the contents of the tray. A little frown creased her forehead.

"I don't need to," his smirk became more pronounced.

Sakura glared at him but decided to let it slide. There was absolutely no point in arguing with him, she reasoned. She knew it was probably a combined result of frustration and boredom that he had taken to teasing her but she couldn't find it within her to care. He was so infuriating!

It was easier just to slip back into healer mode; a nice, safe situation where everything was strictly professional and the only thing that mattered was administering the right treatment to her patient. Soon she lost herself in the flow of chakra, focusing only on the bone and sinew that knit itself together under the influence of the green glow that emanated from her fingers; except for the small voice at the back of her mind that continued to appreciate the skin that hugged the man's well-defined muscles, his masculine jaw and vivid blue eyes.

There was just one bandage left to apply. It would cover the lower half of his torso and prevent the wounds from worsening before the next interrogation. It felt strange to leave the job half-done when she had plenty of chakra left in her reserves but orders were orders and Sakura had nothing to gain by disobeying them.

"Can you sit up, er…" She was suddenly aware that she did not know his name. The Akatsuki member made no attempt to move, an arrogant smirk plastered across his face. "Do you want me to heal you or not?" Sakura glared, not at all amused.

His eyes seemed to contemplate her unwaveringly for a moment but he made no attempt to submit to her request. The pink-haired medic scowled, unable to believe that he was once again deliberately taunting her.

_Don't rise to his bait, Sakura_, she told herself in an attempt to quell the anger that had bubbled inside her._ It's what he wants._

She seemed unwilling to follow her own advice however. She clenched her fists at the sight of the broad smirk that crossed his face, reminding herself once again that it was against hospital policy to harm patients. She was getting dangerously close to flying off the handle once more when he sat up, an infuriating smile upon his face. Furious, she applied the bandage with much more ferocity and speed than was necessary and stormed across the room to the exit.

The medic glared angrily at the room at large as her slender fingers gripped the edge of the door. It took all of her remaining strength not to try and slam it and as she was wrestling with herself, he spoke one word.

"Deidara".

"What?" The words came out more sharply than she had intended. She was in no mood for his games.

"It's my name, yeah" He replied, that maddening smirk back once more.

In the brief aftermath of his words, Sakura's jade eyes widened with undisguised shock. Then _bang!_ The door slammed against the frame with so much force that huge jagged cracks appeared on the wall. Not stopping to check the damage, she stomped off down the corridor, clenching her fists angrily as his laughter echoed all around her.

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**A/N:** Please tell me what you thought! Did you enjoy the rewrite more than the original? (It's twice the length)


	3. Bloodline Limit

**A/N:** This is the rewritten version of chapter three! There's lots of changes; new scenes and old scenes with significant differences. This rewrite was even harder than the last chapter to write as there were more parts to rethink and rewrite = very time-consuming + annoying. I hope you enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

**

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Chapter 3: Bloodline Limit**

* * *

The sun had risen only mere hours before but already the Sunagakure had transformed into a sweltering mass of sand and terracotta buildings. Not a single shutter remained closed as the villagers left their windows open in the hope of tempting a nonexistent breeze. The only specks of colour to be seen were the washing hung out to dry on the rooftops and balconies dotted around the village, fully exposed to the ferocity of the sun.

Sakura leaned over to jab the button on the revolving fan with a sigh and sidled closer to the current of air while still in range of the dresser upon which she had spread the herbs she'd bought the previous day. The mirror, hotel pamphlets and note pad had all been dumped unceremoniously to the floor to make room for the plants she had purchased and the testing equipment that she had shamelessly stolen from the laboratory on her way back from the healing session last night. A blank sheaf of paper lay to her right, ready for note-taking with a pen poised currently a few inches below Sakura's mouth, bearing the recent signs of fresh bite-marks.

In truth, it was not strictly necessary for Sakura to examine the herbs at that moment. She could even wait until she returned to Konoha if she wanted but truthfully she wanted some time to herself where she could focus on something that was comfortingly familiar and analysing plant attributes definitely fell under that category.

The properties of the plants were interesting and unusual but even they seemed not to hold Sakura's attention for very long. Her thoughts began to dwell on other topics; Deidara not the least of them. It was difficult to believe that she had been in Konoha only a week ago, blissfully oblivious of the mission she was about to undertake in the Sand. Oh it wasn't that she hated the mission. She didn't hate Deidara but – she sighed, pushing pale pink strands out of her face – it was just that even after only one day he'd figured out what made her tick and that irritated her to no end.

Perhaps it was a good thing that the Konoha reinforcements were arriving the day after tomorrow; she missed having someone to talk to and while Naruto was not the best candidate she was certain that Kakashi would share some insight on her situation and perhaps give her some advice on finding out why the Sand had been so adamant that she took the mission. She wondered vaguely if she should break into the medical centre at night to look at the records. Unfortunately the details of how she was going to enter unnoticed remained sketchy at best as a skeleton crew of medics and administrative staff were bound to be milling around the building at those indecent hours. Or at least they would be if Suna was anything like Konoha.

Luckily there was an easy enough way to figure out how many staff were stationed at the centre at night. All she would need to do would be to take a look at the staff rota on the wall. It would give her everything she needed.

Feeling marginally better now that she had some kind of plan, Sakura walked over to the tiny kitchen with the intention of pouring herself a glass of water. As she watched the torrent of liquid burst from the curved silver pipe, her thoughts wandered back to her troublesome patient: Deidara.

The tap emitted a high-pitched squeak as she swivelled it shut with a sigh and she watched the gush of water flowing into the sink diminish to a trickle.

With astonishing clarity she remembered the blonde's exasperating smirk and cerulean blue eyes which practically danced with mirth. She groaned and placed her head in her hands. Why did he infuriate her so much? He had taunted and teased her and she had taken the bait every single time without fail. It was no secret that she had a ridiculously short temper but she had managed to rein it in – mostly – when dealing with patients at the hospital in Konoha. Why then was it affecting her now?

Perhaps it was the uniqueness of the situation she was in that had allowed her feelings to become compromised. She had taken on the mission grudgingly and only out of respect for her shishou, though she had to admit that curiosity for who had requested her had played a big part in that. Her best friend was a jinchuuriki and the Akatsuki were known for collecting bijuu from their hosts. This man had attempted to capture Gaara and extract the bijuu from him; an act that would have spelled certain death for the sand-user. It terrified her to think that Deidara's target could just as easily been Naruto.

She shook her head distractedly, ignoring the cascade of soft, pink locks sweep gently across her brow. She was missing something, something big. There had to be another reason she was so incensed; her reluctance to take on the mission and the fact that he was an Akatsuki just didn't cover it.

She frowned and bit her lip in exasperation. She wasn't being honest with herself. If the truth was to be known, she wasn't dreading her next healing session half as much as she should be. In the last couple of days she had put a face to the man who had threatened the Kazekage and – if the rumours were true – the entire village. She had only caught the briefest glimpse of his personality the previous day but somehow, inexplicably she found herself wanting to know more. Sakura had the distinct sense that there was something _more_ to him than what she had seen in those few scant hours they had shared and she could no more deny the definite pull she felt towards him than pretend that Kakashi hadn't once caught her in the showers.

She groaned. She was being foolish. What could she possibly gain by trying to know him? It could not end well.

There were still a few hours to kill before she was due at the healing centre and anymore time spent indoors would be viewed as a complete waste of sunshine so Sakura changed into some denim shorts and a green t-shirt before heading out the door, only just remembering to grab some sun lotion and shades on the way out.

It became apparent upon leaving the safety of the hotel that the pink-haired kunoichi had absolutely no idea where to go. The market place had long since been cleared of its vibrant, noisy stalls; the only clue to its existence being the metal frame of the stalls and a smattering of wrappers and half-eaten pastries which still littered the ground and – as it was only her second full day in the Sand – she had no real knowledge of the place or its attractions.

She spun on the spot, retracing the few metres of sand she had chosen to pace up and down, a frown wrinkling her skin. To show up at the medical centre a few hours early would be sure to raise more than a few eyebrows and with nothing to do but linger in the waiting room until the interrogation ended made that option extremely unappealing. Equally unattractive was the idea of returning to the hotel where all that awaited her was the prospect of watching mindless sitcoms on a questionable television. She had had her fill of shopping the previous day and although she had been given a pass to the training grounds, she did not relish the idea of turning up at the medical centre tired and sweaty. That left visiting Temari.

Sakura was reluctant to see her again after only one day, especially as the manner in which they departed had been anything but cheerful. However, she was running out of options and it was something she'd have to face eventually so she might as well do now. She spun around and headed off in the direction of the blonde's apartment.

Twenty minutes later the pink-haired medic squinted down at the small, cramped handwriting for the tenth time, wincing as the slip of paper upon which it was written turned blindingly white upon coming into contact with sun's rays. She vaguely remembered the route that Temari had described to her the previous day but unfortunately that didn't prevent her from getting lost and at times she had to ask passers-by on the street who reluctantly gave her directions, apparently mortified by her choice of attire.

Sakura eyed the civilians critically, wondering how they could bear to wear robes that swathed them from head to toe in a thick, beige fabric when they lived in a village full of perpetual sunshine and surrounded by a vast desert. She shook her head disbelievingly.

Ten minutes later she arrived at her destination. It was a block of apartments, much like any other towering building in the village and by consulting the address a twelfth time she saw that Temari's apartment was on the fourth floor.

She pressed the appropriate buzzer and waited for a response, praying that Temari was in and that her little venture outside had not been a complete waste of time. She didn't have to wait long.

"Hello?" The blonde's familiar voice crackled through the intercom.

"It's me, Sakura," the pink-haired medic replied, leaning in towards the speaker as she held her index finger on the talk button. "Can I come up?"

"Yes, of course," Temari replied genially and then her voice took on a note of concern. "Sakura, is everything alright?"

A strange feeling of unease settled somewhere in the pink-haired kunoichi's midriff. Was she really that easy to read? Perhaps Deidara was right; perhaps she _was_ naive after all.

"I'm fine," Sakura affixed a bright smile to her face that only she could see and hoped that she sufficiently managed to mask the slight quaver to her tone. "I just wanted to chat, that's all. You seemed a little off yesterday".

"Oh, okay," Temari replied after a moment's pause and Sakura heard a sharp click as the door unlocked itself.

The temperature instantly dropped five degrees as Sakura stepped into the cool, well-ventilated foyer and she spent several seconds basking in the cool breeze that wafted from the air conditioning units before she realised that she probably looked rather stupid.

She took the large elevator to the fourth floor, anxiously checking and rechecking her reflection in the smooth, glassy mirror that dominated the back wall. She hoped that Temari would refrain from asking questions about the healing session yesterday. Aside from a keenness to avoid finding herself on the receiving end of the girl's almost accusatory stares, Sakura was equally keen to hide her mixed feelings – a curious jumble of loathing and intrigue – on the patient.

"Sakura!" Temari embraced her upon entering the apartment. "Would you like a drink? You look parched!"

"Yes please," the medic replied, taking the opportunity to look around the apartment with interest. It was open-plan and tastefully designed with creams, oranges and reds being the reoccurring theme.

"I realise I was being a bit rude yesterday" Temari said apologetically as she handed Sakura a glass of cool water. "It's just the very thought of that monster being allowed in the Sand makes me angry".

"You do realise it's only until they finish interrogating him, right?"

"Yeah, I know". She put on a different voice. "_It's necessary to keep him here Temari until we extract all the information_. That's what Gaara said and I can't change his mind".

She paced around the room in deep agitation, unable to stand still. "I don't understand why Gaara isn't more worried! That man is nothing more than a cold-blooded killer intent on killing him and he just allows him to be confined within the same village! What if he finds a way to escape! It's just insane!"

"I'm sure that won't happen" Sakura said soothingly. "He's under constant watch and they've clamped chakra bands around his wrists. He's not going anywhere".

Temari sniffed and then said "I don't know how you can stand to heal him every day. He doesn't deserve to live. Why on earth did you take on such a mission?"

"You don't know?" Sakura asked, surprise written all over her features.

"No. Why should I?" the blonde answered suspiciously.

"Oh, I thought Gaara might have told you," Sakura lied once she'd hid her initial shock. "Tsunade asked me to as a personal favour to her. I couldn't refuse. Wish I had though".

Temari gave a weak chuckle. "Yeah, I bet".

As the conversation moved on to other topics, Sakura couldn't help but dwell on the fact that Temari had been ignorant of the Sand's request for her to take on the mission. She had been certain that as the Kazekage's sister, Temari would have been made aware of it. It definitely seemed suspicious and she was keener than ever to get her hands upon her transfer file. It held the answers she wanted.

…

It was with a mixture of emotions that Sakura approached the medical centre that afternoon. Part of her wanted to talk to Deidara again – although she had no inkling why, the man drove her half mad for goodness sake! – and the other half wanted nothing more to do with him. She hesitated before the whitewashed walls, teetering on the edge of anxiety and attempted to ignore the strong compulsion to wallow in her indecision. It was only after several minutes which comprised of chewing heavily on her lower lip and scuffing her boots in the sand that she realised she had yet to step inside. She rolled her eyes half-exasperated, half-amused at her apparent unease and entered the building resolutely, convinced that she was worrying over nothing and that her interest in Deidara was nothing short of morbid curiosity.

The room was exactly as she'd remembered. The familiar repugnant stench of damp as it hit her nostrils served as a sufficient reminder for all the emotions of the previous day. She welcomed their return with little enthusiasm. Once her eyes had accustomed to the gloom she could make out the faint outline of Deidara lying motionless on the lumpy, old mattress whose expiry date probably dated back ten years previously; the telltale sign of his ragged breathing the only sign that he was alive.

Gulping down her last vestiges of worry, the medic marched across the room in ten easy strides, deciding that a no nonsense approach was the best option available to her and wasting no breath on the polite greeting of "hello and how are you today?" that was considered pretty mandatory at the hospital in Konoha. She rather thought he didn't deserve it.

The man looked up at the sound of her approach; his crystalline blue eyes capturing hers in one sweeping movement. Sakura flinched away reflexively, more afraid of her own readiness to respond than his unconcealed interest.

"I knew you'd be back," he whispered hoarsely, raising himself a few scant inches from the moth-eaten pillow and scarcely managed to smirk before his facial muscles contorted into a grimace.

"Don't talk," Sakura pushed him back down on the bed, in tones that left no room for nonsense. "You'll spill blood all over the bedspread".

"I knew you wouldn't be able to stay away," Deidara continued with obvious arrogance, intending to rile her.

"You know, I think I preferred it when you were unconscious," Sakura replied nonchalantly, determined to remain firmly in control of her legendary temper. "Much less annoying".

"Would you prefer it if I remained silent then, yeah?" Deidara asked sardonically.

"Yes actually," the irate reply flew from the pink-haired medic's tongue without any real thought but it appeared not to have the effect she desired. Quite the opposite in fact. Her flippant remark had caught him off-guard and instead of countering it with another of his snide comments, the blonde-haired Akatsuki simply glanced away.

"Hmph," he replied to her uttermost surprise.

Deidara's grunted response effectively ended the conversation so they carried on in silence for a while. Sakura's jade eyes focused on his torso with renewed enthusiasm wondering what she could have done to offend him and then wondering if she should care. As her hands ghosted over his bleeding and broken skin, lingering a longer than was strictly necessary over his toned abs, Sakura toyed with apologising to the man but she wasn't entirely sure what she had done to upset him. She had only been half-serious in her reply and he had taken all of her earlier jibes with good humour, although she had to admit that most of the taunting had been at her expense.

"I'm sorry," she said hesitantly after a while, unsure of what to say. "I didn't mean to upset you".

Unexpectedly Deidara snickered. "You'll need to try a lot harder than that to upset me, yeah".

"Could you at least lay off mocking me for one minute?" Sakura replied. "I was trying to apologise!"

"Alright, alright," he grinned, enjoying the look of irritation consume her features. It was immensely satisfying to wind the pink-haired medic up; she had become his only source of entertainment. All in all, he thought he was rather fortunate to have received a medic so unprofessional, so intriguing and so oblivious to the fact that she presented him with a full view whenever she leaned over him to reach for a roll of bandages.

"Your hands-" Sakura began, bringing the blonde-haired Akatsuki back to earth with a jolt as her jade eyes rested upon one of his upturned palms. "They're a bloodline limit right?"

She had come across several bloodline limits before in her line of work, but never anything like these. She watched in half-fascination as the moist pink tongue protruding from the mouth on his left palm twitched reflexively. At first glance, it wasn't apparent what the Deidara used them for and as it was extremely unlikely she'd ever get to see him in battle she was practically bursting with curiosity.

For the first time surprise flittered across his features. Of all the things he'd expected her to say, this was not one of them.

"Why do you care, yeah?" He replied, instantly turning snappy at the mere mention of his hands. They were a constant reminder of the very thing he was denied: freedom.

"Well, they're quite unusual" Sakura answered bravely, keen to keep the conversation light and friendly. Perhaps it was her frayed nerves that couldn't stand an argument – to be honest Sakura wasn't really sure. She was just trying to make the best out of a bad situation. The mission was already giving her a headache and she intended to keep the stress to a bare minimum. "Besides you were asking about my headband yesterday. It's only fair-"

"Whatever". The blonde-haired Akatsuki sighed. Apparently he wasn't interested in arguing further today, if his nonchalant expression was anything to go by. Sakura bristled at the blatant snub but chose to ignore it and continued to heal him, perhaps a little more roughly than before.

A low chuckle emitted from the bed and caused Sakura to stare at him, undisguised outrage upon her face. It was barely twenty minutes into the healing session and already he was finding new ways to taunt and tease.

"What the hell is your problem!" she hissed furiously, feeling a sense of déjà vu from yesterday.

"Nothing" He replied watching her response with unconcealed amusement. Sakura's jade eyes flashed at those words; her grip tightened painfully upon the bottle of antiseptic she was holding and she resisted the urge to smash it. Realising that she was not going to continue until she received an answer, he sighed. "Well, for a shinobi, you're not very good at concealing your emotions or weaknesses. It's a wonder you're still alive, yeah".

"And it's a wonder you're still alive if you hand out tips to enemy shinobi" She shot back angrily, furious at his sheer nerve. Weakness – her's in particular – was an extremely touchy topic for the pink-haired medic.

Deidara considered her briefly, realising he'd hit a nerve. "Perhaps" he conceded. "But I think it's hardly relevant in this situation, yeah".

The casual manner in which he spoke about his confinement unnerved her, she had to admit. It shocked her to the point that she momentarily forgot that she was supposed to be angry with him. How could he be so blasé about something like that? Was it an inevitable side-effect of facing danger everyday as an S-Class criminal or was it simply within his nature not to care? It was impossible to figure him out.

"What?"

Deidara had finally noticed her staring. Sakura fought the urge to blush.

"I'm just trying to understand you," she began slowly, uncertain of how to phrase her thoughts without coming across as insulting or intrusive.

"Don't," he replied simply.

* * *

**A/N:** Please review. I like it when my hard work is appreciated :)


	4. Shades of Grey

**A/N: **Finally the rewritten version of chapter 4! There are more changes at the beginning than the end because I was getting a bit sick of the rewrites so I'm not 100% happy with it. But the DeiSaku scenes are perfect, which is the most important part I suppose. I've decided not to rewrite any more chapters as its too much work and is slowing the progress of the story. Please review. I'd love to hear your thoughts on the rewrite! :)**  
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**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto in any shape or form.

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Chapter 4: Shades of Grey**

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Sakura wiped several beads of sweat from her damp forehead with the back of her hand and let out an audible sigh. She resigned herself to several long tedious hours of working in the stifling hot room which – thanks to the sizzling weather outside – resembled that of a piping-hot oven. Apparently S-Class Criminals weren't entitled to basic human rights such as the luxury of air conditioning but they could have at least thought about the staff that had to _work_ in those conditions, Sakura thought tiredly. She yawned and rubbed a stray fleck of sleep out of her eyes, reflecting that a combination of the weather and the excessive amounts of chakra required to heal the patients most likely acted as a sufficient deterrent to most complaints. Generally speaking, people didn't make the effort to file a complaint when they were bone-tired.

"Not much sleep last night?" Deidara asked the medic conversationally. The question was posed innocently enough but Sakura caught a glimmer of an expression on his face which was entirely too knowing. With the distinct impression that he was playing mind games again she side-stepped the question. It didn't take an observant person to deduce that she was shattered. He couldn't know anything, she reassured herself.

"I thought we'd agreed not to pry into each other's lives, Deidara," Sakura deflected his question with a stony smile which was rather at odds with her nervous racing heart. She had never been very good at concealing her emotions but she hoped that the dimness of the room provided sufficient cover to hide her unease.

"No, you agreed not to pry into my life," Deidara countered, a crooked smirk enhancing his features. "I said nothing about yours".

Sakura felt a heady rush of blood thunder needlessly through her veins at those words and prayed that it wouldn't find its way to her cheeks. She refused believe for even one minute that he had even the slightest interest in her. The last thing she needed was an ill-timed blush which would be embarrassing more than anything else. She admitted that the man was undeniably attractive and that she would have happily spent most of the time in his company ogling him if it wasn't for the situation she was in but there was no reason for him to know that. She had no intention of inflating his over-sized ego.

"I think you'd find my life pretty boring, to be honest," the medic replied, hoping that by down-playing her circumstances he would lose interest.

"Really? Because I'd have thought sneaking round the hospital at night would certainly count as interesting," the blonde said with smug satisfaction, cerulean blue eyes sparkling as they gauged her reaction.

"W-what do you mean?" Sakura stammered; her mind in complete turmoil. She hardly dared to trust her ears, only doing so because the overwhelming evidence that it was not a figment of her imagination lay right before her eyes. It was hard to misinterpret the triumphant look upon his face.

Fear, bordering on the hysterical clawed at her insides as she attempted to control her alarmingly accelerated breathing. Frightened thoughts whirled around her brain like a maelstrom and with them came the realisation of what the discovery of her late night excursion would mean. It was inconceivable to the medic how the Akatsuki member had caught wind of her little transgression, especially as the man in question wore shackles specifically designed to block chakra manipulation. Although she hated to admit it, there was a strong possibility that the sand shinobi were aware of her less-than-innocent behaviour. Even more worrying, was the idea that they knew and had failed to act on it. She retraced the night in her head, looking for potential flaws in her plan; for something, anything she might have overlooked.

She had worn light, dark gear designed for stealth; taking extra care to hide her all-too-noticeable bright hair under a thick woollen hat, ensuring that she wouldn't be immediately recognisable if she was unfortunate enough to run into someone. She had arrived there several hours before dawn – a subtle sneak peak at the rota on the way out of the medical centre had informed her of the optimum time to stage her break-in – unable to shake the distinct feeling that something was bound to go wrong. Unfortunately her instinct hadn't been wrong.

_The small wooden window creaked in protest, shedding white paint on the floor as the two blocks of wood – which had lamentably expanded in the afternoon heat – rubbed abrasively against each other. Sakura stiffened at the sound. She peered through the dense foliage which provided suitable cover for her little act of deviance and strained her ears to detect even the slightest sound. After a minute or two, she relaxed and shoved her black bag through the small opening before squeezing in after it. After several tense moments in which she struggled desperately to wriggle through the gap, she concluded she needed to find a better window. She groaned, imagining having to explain to several irate shinobi in the morning exactly why she was presenting her arse to the entire world whilst forcing her way into a small toilet in the east wing of the medical centre. With that thought firmly stuck in mind, Sakura managed to free herself from the window and breathed a sigh of relief. _

_Perhaps it was because she had no business being there but the medical centre was strangely eerie at night. The medic found herself checking and rechecking the dark corners of the hospital as she traversed the silent corridors, convinced that there was someone lurking in the shadows but these fears always proved unfounded. She concluded it was just her imagination._

_Sakura turned the corner and jumped a foot in the air as a sudden outburst of whistling broke the silence, followed by the unmistakable sound of footsteps. Frantically she looked around for somewhere to hide and spied a door slightly ajar further down the hall. She had only just managed to sidle into the room when a janitor wearing navy overalls and wheeling a tray of cleaning agents rounded the corner, whistling a merry tune. Sakura instinctively shrank against the wall as he passed and only expelled the air she had been unconsciously holding when the man was beyond hearing range. That had been close!_

_She arrived at the office without further incident and proceeded to flick through the contents of some very official-looking grey filing cabinets before she found what she was looking for. A draw marked "Transfers". Eagerly she scanned the draw, stopping only when she found the file name "Haruno, Sakura"._

_She leafed through the contents excitedly, on the lookout for anything that might indicate why she was there. Almost immediately she noticed the promising word "Requested" stamped diagonally across the page in red ink. The medic smiled faintly and continued to peruse the transfer file with renewed interest, skipping over the details she deemed unimportant such as her age, height and rank as a shinobi._

_She paused at the mission heading but it was decidedly uninformative. She read aloud; "Assigned as personal medic for the interrogation of the Akatsuki prisoner: Deidara. Duration of mission is unknown". She groaned and ran her fingers through her pink strands of hair in frustration. "Tell me something I don't know"._

_Further down the page she found what she was looking for, "Authorisation for Request: Confidential"._

"_Confidential?" Sakura wondered aloud. This piece of news was startling and intriguing to say the least. It was also a little worrying. What could be so important that the client refused to be named? If they wanted to remain anonymous, it definitely changed things. For one thing, they would be a lot harder to track down than she had initially thought. After several moments of speculation, Sakura decided that the Kazekage was the most likely candidate. Or at least, he was the only person she could think of who would want to keep his actions under the radar._

_She thumbed through the rest of the file but found nothing else worth of note. She yawned and stuffed the folder back into the cabinet, displeased. The results of her little excursion had brought up more questions than answers._

"I think you know exactly what I mean, yeah". Deidara was speaking again, arrogant smirk firmly back in place. Sakura suspected he was thoroughly enjoying the unexpected role reversal. For once she was at his mercy, instead of him at hers.

"I-, you were mistaken," she replied stubbornly, folding her arms defensively. Unfortunately she sounded little more convincing than Tsunade had when Shizune discovered several empty bottles of sake stuffed behind a bookshelf in the Hokage's office a few weeks back.

Deidara raised an eyebrow. "Are you going to tell me what you were up to?"

"What makes you think I was up to something?" Sakura replied. "There could be a perfectly legitimate reason for returning here, that is providing I did return here last night. You can't prove it either way".

"No, but I'm willing to bet that you would do anything to keep news of your visit from reaching the wrong ears," he replied, looking like the cat that got the cream. "I'm sure that they could find traces of your presence if they looked hard enough, yeah".

_So this was how it was going to be?_ Sakura thought grimly; quite unable to believe her ears which had no trouble discerning the thinly veiled threat. The realisation that her patient, _her_ patient of all people was extorting her left the kunoichi feeling rankled. A split-second later she reluctantly reminded herself who she was dealing with. He was a member of the Akatsuki. Blackmail was probably ingrained into his soul; second nature, almost.

"What do you want," she growled, eyes flashing predatorily. She took a defensive stance, with hands on her hips, fearing that she had made a serious oversight in even daring to talk to him in a manner that was anything but professional.

Her heart-beat reached a crescendo, crashing against her ribs in mingled fury and fear as she met his steadfast gaze, grappling with her inner havoc in an attempt to keep her eyes neutral. Her palpitated breathing punctuated the air. Like a caged animal, she was backed into a corner and she knew she had no choice but to meet his demands if she wanted to avoid an inquiry. Then again, perhaps that was the lesser of the two evils. If she caved, the acts she could be forced to commit would have repercussions of astronomical size – far more dangerous than being caught dipping her hand in a few confidential documents. She could be facing a life-time in prison.

"Well that depends," he grinned broadly and leaned back on his bed artfully with an air of apparent nonchalance – but his eyes were sharp and scrutinising.

"Deidara!"

"Relax. Like I'd tell them anything," he scoffed, a shadow of resentment darkening his face momentarily as he jerked his head in the direction of the closed door.

Wide-eyed and wary, the medic stared at him, completely caught off-guard. "Why wouldn't you?" she asked him slowly, still digesting the peculiar phrase as she formulated a reply.

"Do you want me to tell them?" He asked, undisguised incredulity creating noticeable chinks in his facade of perfect indifference.

"Of course I don't!" Sakura said hotly, expelling her sharp retort into the stuffy atmosphere. Her lungs constricted tightly as another rolling wave of unease washed over her numb, disbelieving body.

"Then stop complaining, yeah," he replied simply, expecting her to drop the matter then and there. "I would achieve nothing by telling them".

A slight frown creased the smooth skin of Sakura's forehead. It was true that he wouldn't achieve anything by ratting her out to the Sand but he could achieve a lot by threatening her with the prospect of informing them. Perhaps he didn't relish the idea of being a tattle-tale but Sakura sensed intuitively that it ran deeper than that. So why had he chosen not to? Wisely, she chose not to press the matter, having learnt from experience that Deidara was likely to clam up upon being asked such a direct, personal question.

"How did you find out?" The medic asked after several moments of hush, speaking into her knees as she spoke, hugging them worriedly. Inwardly, she repressed the urge to shy away from hearing the dreaded answer but it was vital to learn the truth. "You shouldn't be able to sense anything with those chakra bands on; did someone tell you?"

Deidara shook his head. "No".

Sakura breathed the sigh of relief she'd been unconsciously holding.

"Healing takes up quite a lot of chakra," he began slowly, as if not sure where to begin. Sakura nodded encouragingly at the familiar basic fact – one of the first Tsunade had ever imparted her with. Unbidden, her first healing lesson crept into her mind. "And foreign chakra takes a while to disperse; there's usually a residue left over when massive amounts of chakra are transferred".

The medic swept a lock of lustrous, rosy hair out from her vivid green eyes and frowned. "So-"

"I felt the residue chakra respond last night and knew you were close," he said plainly, the familiar bite of impatience returning to his voice.

"But how-"

"How am I supposed to know?" Deidara snapped, his short-temper resurfacing for the umpteenth time and Sakura knew the interview was over.

She lowered her eyes disappointedly and suppressed the instinct to sigh. Frightening though it was to admit it, they had been getting on surprisingly well – if you excluded the blackmailing and the taunting. She figured they must have broken some kind of record to be able to conduct a civil conversation with each other. Even if it was for only a minute. For one ludicrous, heart-stopping second she had actually believed, no _deluded_ herself into thinking he actually might like her, considering he had refrained from telling on her. She brushed the thought aside impatiently, as one might a fly. She was being ridiculous. It shouldn't matter to her so she wondered why it did.

* * *

Finally, the day of her friends' arrival dawned. Breaking her established tradition, Sakura rose from the soft downy bed upon the first wail that emitted from the tiny alarm clock perched on her bedside table. It made a change from being subjected to a never-ending war with the snooze button. Humming to herself, she glanced out of the window at the superb blue sky and attacked her morning routines with more enthusiasm than usual. She would be at the entrance to the sand far too early but she didn't care.

The great sun-burnt yellow gates which led to the outside world were propped open on their hinges, revealing a golden, glittering vista which stretched out as far as the eye could see. Apart from a few sentries milling around the inner complex, the place was deserted. Flicking her cherry blossom hair impatiently, Sakura stared out at the desert unwaveringly, a hand poised above her brow to shield her gaze from the ferocity of the morning sun.

As the yellow fiery orb rose higher in the sky, great physical rolling waves of heat began to descend on the village. Subjected to the intensity of its gaze, it wasn't long before the medic became uncomfortably hot and her throat burned with irritation. Spying a small strip of shade against a nearby building, she settled down and resumed her watching, chastising herself for not bringing a bottle of water.

She knew it was stupid to wait for them to arrive. She knew it was stupid waiting at the entrance to the village half the morning – she was already receiving a few funny looks – but she couldn't wait. Now more than ever, she needed the advice and support of her friends. There was nothing better for her to do here anyway, she thought bitterly.

"Here," A white-garbed guard startled her by passing her a bottle of water. He had probably been watching her a while, she realised with slight trepidation. She wondered if they'd met before. "You look parched".

"Thanks," she smiled gratefully taking the drink which was mercifully cool. The fabled liquid splashed down her throat, watering the cracked, dry desert it had become. The guard was already striding away.

With nothing better to do, her mind inevitably began to dwell on her mysterious employer and the differences that divided Konoha and Suna so starkly that the contrast seemed almost black and white. Lazily she leant back against the sun-bleached wall. How would Konoha have reacted if they had caught a member of the Akatsuki that had just attempted to assassinate their Hokage?

_Well they wouldn't have requested a medic from another village for a start_, Sakura scowled.

Fortunately she was saved from further musings as a number of dark spots appeared on the horizon. She squinted against the glare, attempting to discern the features of the shadowy figures. Within minutes, the indistinct figures had trebled in size. Sakura stood up and watched with rapt attention as they grew larger and larger and began to take on more distinct forms. She ran forwards, kicking up great plumes of sand in her haste and gripping her bottle so tightly it almost split. They were here!

A few breathless seconds later and Naruto, Kakashi, Gai, Lee, Ten Ten and Neji passed through the bleached wooden gates; beads of sweat trickling down their sun-burnt foreheads.

"Naruto-kun!" Sakura threw her arms around the startled blonde, who grinned in response.

"Oh hey, Sakura-chan," Naruto casually ruffled his hair, still grinning. "Did you miss me?"

Sakura laughed; a sound unfamiliar to her ears. "It's been so dull here without you guys." She glanced over at her former teacher, who was straightening his headband. "It's good to see you too Kakashi-sensai!"

"Hey, Sakura-chan! Did you miss me too?" Lee butted in a little too enthusiastically, stumbling across the uneven sand in his eagerness.

"Shut up Bushy-Brows" Naruto groaned. He added in an undertone "He's been getting on my nerves the whole journey".

"At least-" Sakura whispered back.

"Sakura-chan! Please, please, please will you give me a super amazing tour of the village?" Lee interrupted once more. Behind him, Ten Ten and Neji shook their heads in disgust.

"Er-" She began rather awkwardly, in no mood to appease others. Thankfully she was saved from answering by Naruto and his bottomless stomach.

"Do you know where the nearest ramen shop is? I'm starving!" Naruto grinned in anticipation.

"Um, I don't think there is one," she replied slowly. Predictably, an intense look of disappointment crossed the Number One, Unpredictable Ninja's face and before long the entire group was subjected to one hundred reasons why a village without a ramen shop should be a criminal offence.

Grateful for the distraction, Sakura was free to talk to the copy-cat ninja in relative peace and she took the opportunity with apparent relish. She glanced up at her former teacher who was watching Naruto's tirade with an amused expression and wondered how to convey across her unease and misgivings about the mission without being overly dramatic. She briefly considered confessing about the almost-blackmail before she recoiled, dismissing it instantly. It wasn't necessary for him to know, she decided uncomfortably, averse to seeing the shame that would undoubtedly cross her sensei's face. She wasn't above lying or omitting certain truths, if she had to.

"Something on your mind, Sakura?" Kakashi smiled as his visible eye met hers.

"Oh, um it's nothing!" Caught off-guard, she replied a little too brightly and wincing inwardly at the reflex answer. They walked in silence for a while as Sakura attempted to recompose her chaotic thoughts. "Actually…" She began hesitantly.

"Yes?"

They had stopped in the middle of the street oblivious to the people around them.

"It's about the mission," Sakura said in a rush. "I… I don't think I can do this. It's too…" She paused, searching for the right word.

Kakashi gave her a small smile. "There will always be missions that are more personal than others. Your best friend is a Jinchuuriki and you've been asked to heal a member of the organisation that is after him. That must be difficult".

Sakura nodded, unable to dispel the bubble of anxiety welling up inside her chest. The whole mission disturbed her on more levels than one. Sometimes she thought she must be going insane. It was not just the situation that bothered her but her own reaction to it. It was not something she could express with mere words and Sakura decided it was unwise to try, so she remained silent.

"You'll do just fine," Kakashi said supportively.

"Yeah" Sakura agreed automatically, forcing herself to appear cheerful. Her friends were surrounding and supporting her, so why did she still feel so alone?

* * *

By now, the sun had reached its highest peak in the sky and only the mud-baked buildings could keep the scorching rays at bay. For this reason alone, the streets were emptied of the chaotic crowds that filled them leaving only a few stragglers and a trio of Konoha ninja to brave the heat. Despite this, Sakura's mood steadily improved. The sweltering heat was a small price to pay for her reunion with her boys.

Her time spent with Naruto before the Sand had been very brief. There had been little time to swap stories and the medic was genuinely curious about Naruto's three-year absence. She only hoped that Jiraiya hadn't made too much of a lasting impression on him, making a mental note not to bathe in the hot springs any time soon.

She glanced at her former sensei for any changes, who had barely broken into a sweat despite the weather, while managing to exude the same casual, laid-back attitude she knew so well. Yep. Kakashi was the same as ever.

"Which way to the Kazekage's office?" Naruto said abruptly, breaking into her train of thought and effectively ending her musings.

"Um…" Truthfully Sakura had no idea where it was but she doubted that really mattered. The Kazekage – she had heard – was literally swamped with paperwork, meetings and who knew what else. It was unlikely that Gaara would be able to find time to meet with them until they could provide new information and supply insight to the situation. While Kakashi explained all this to Naruto with more patience than Sakura knew she could ever muster, she remembered her own reasons for wanting to visit the Kazekage. She wondered vaguely if she would have the courage to ask him. Perhaps if she'd been like Naruto she would have marched off there and demanded an answer out of him the moment she had arrived. But she was not. Either way, her questions would have to wait.

Just as the water in her bottle was getting perilously close to zero, the trio spied a bar only a few hundred yards away. Sakura sighed in relief. The heat was as ferocious as ever and the others shared her enthusiasm of retreating into the shade.

They settled down at a small rickety wooden table – which was mercifully in the shade – in no hurry to order. The pink-haired kunoichi glanced around the table, unable to keep a small smile from forming on her lips. She had barely seen Naruto return from his training before being whisked away on another mission but it appeared that after three years he was still as hot-headed and immature as before. Somehow, she wasn't surprised.

This was how it should be. The three of them together again. She spared only a passing thought for Sasuke. She tried not to think of him if she could help it. Although her attraction for him had faded long ago, she still wished they could have done something, anything to save him. But there was no point dwelling on the past. Sasuke was gone.

Determined to let none of her thoughts show, Sakura grabbed the drinks menu from the middle of the table and perused it absently. 'Sandy's' was written across the top in a bold, graceful script.

"Not very original are they?" Sakura remarked.

"Oh let's just order!" Naruto replied. "I'm too thirsty to think".

"Alright," Sakura scanned the menu before picking the safe option – water. "What are you having Naruto-kun, kaka-sensei?"

The afternoon that followed was the best she'd had in a while. One, two, three hours whirled away in what seemed like minutes and all too soon it was time for Sakura to leave.

"Well," she said with a smile, draining the last of her juice. "This has been brilliant guys, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to leave now. Duty calls," she said with a sigh, the familiar weight of dread settling on her burdened shoulders.

Kakashi raised his hand in farewell. "See y-"

"To heal that Akatsuki bastard?" Naruto said abruptly, making her wince.

Their former sensei exhaled deeply, not bothering to hide his exasperation.

"Yes" She sighed. Careful to avoid what she imagined would be an accusing gaze, she bent down to pick up her bag off the sandy floor. She turned around to leave. This was what she'd been afraid of. The pink-haired ninja shouldered her pack, sure to take no more than a cursory glance at the bar and definitely not in the direction of the table; of which she had no desire to see ever again.

"I'll see you later" She spoke out loud; unsure of whom she was addressing.

She focused on the sand shifting around her feet as she walked, not daring to look back. She truly was a coward. Why hadn't she stood up for herself? Repeated the arguments that danced around her head? She knew why. How could she defend something she barely believed in herself?

"Hey, wait!" Naruto almost knocked the table over in his haste. "I'm not angry with you!"

Sakura watched him, her eyes widened in shock.

"I'm not blaming you for this!" He began. A smile tugged at the corner of her lips.

"None of this is your fault!" Her smile became a grin.

"I know you don't want to heal him!" It was only sheer reflex that kept her grin in place. _Did_ she? Honestly Sakura didn't know. Her dislike of Deidara because he was an Akatsuki was still as strong as ever and his teasing drove her crazy. But there were times, when she forgot that he was a notorious criminal that she almost _liked_ him. With an effort, she pushed her traitorous thoughts aside. Perhaps she was just over-analysing her emotions.

_Everyone must have some good traits if you look hard enough_, she reassured herself.

"Thanks Naruto" Sakura said, enjoying the warmth that his words gave her which were marred only by the guilt that his last remark had incited in her. "Anyway, I've got to go or I'll be late. See you later, Naruto-kun, Kakashi-Sensai".

She walked away, leaving sandy footprints in the sand, determined to carry some of the warmth her friends had given her inside herself for the rest of the day.

"Sakura-chan!" Naruto's voice carried across the wind. "If he does anything to hurt you, I'll make him pay!"

* * *

Sakura reached the medical centre feeling weirdly optimistic. She wondered if she would regret her lapse of sanity later. Still, even if the session _was_ a complete fiasco she could look forward to seeing her friends afterwards. She cheered up at the thought.

Sakura's heart sank upon reaching the iron-clad door. In spite of her favourable mood, she was reluctant to remove the only obstacle between her and her "patient". A slither of wariness cloaked her mind; she was loathe to give the Akatsuki more opportunities to force her into coercion. However there was little time to hover indecisively as one of the guards opened the door for her. Sakura was torn between thanking and punching him. All she could manage was a small smile as she entered the room far too small for her and her confused emotions.

The healing session began without incident and Sakura began to tend to his wounds almost without thought. Usually when healing the Akatsuki, Sakura's muscles were tense and coiled – a combination of nerves and worry – yet now they felt loose. She was relaxed, she realised with sudden chagrin. Still she was not so foolish as to lower her guard. The man that lay before her could not be trusted.

From the stoic expression on Deidara's face, Sakura surmised that his mood was anything but happy. The little that she had gleaned from his character indicated that he was not in the habit of revealing his true emotions and therefore Sakura was unsurprised that he had not uttered a single word since the session had begun. To all appearances he seemed to find the ceiling more interesting than her company.

Sakura considered herself to be anything but naïve; she knew that the Akatsuki was under no obligation to speak to her, however; this blatant show of indifference was grating on her nerves. All of this should not have bothered her but inexplicably, it did and this made her uncomfortable. Perhaps she should get her head checked. Surely it was a good thing that he wasn't speaking to her? She sighed, remembering how well that had turned out last time. Fraternizing with the enemy was definitely not on the menu.

Against her better judgement she scrutinised his face – at least the half of it that wasn't hidden by a thick golden curtain – attempting to read his apathetic expression. Their eyes made contact, much to her chagrin. All of a sudden the silence became stiflingly obvious.

"Bad day, huh?" Sakura cringed inwardly. Perhaps that wasn't the best choice of words for a once-missing nin where every day was surely a bad day.

When no answer was forthcoming – though in all honesty she hadn't expected one after a statement like that – she tried again.

"Sorry, bad choice of words!" There was a slight nervous edge to her laugh as she attempted to cover up her blunder. "I didn't mean to-"

_Why was she apologising?_ If it had been possible to glare at herself she would have. There were times when he intimidated her even though she was the one with two armed guards to call upon and he had no chakra to defend himself with.

_Coward_. She grimaced, almost tasting the bitter word on her lips. Always, Naruto and Sasuke had surpassed her. Always, she had been the one left behind, too afraid and weak to be anything more than a nuisance. She clenched her fist. Not anymore! She had sworn to be a nuisance no longer. This would be one promise that she'd keep.

A low chuckle emitted from the bed ending in a hacking cough and Sakura felt her cheeks redden, wondering how much he had read from her face. She was being made a fool of. Well two could play at that game.

"Something wrong?" The Konoha medic asked innocently, over what sounded like the Akatsuki was coughing up a lung. She wondered at how one minute she felt almost sorry for the guy and next she could quite happily punch him herself, if not for the fact that he had enough bruises as it was.

"No," He began, trying and failing to control the coughs that wracked his body. "I- I'm fine, yeah". He emerged from his coughing fit scarlet and out of breath.

Perhaps you should have waited until I finished healing your lungs," Sakura said, unable to keep a small smirk from off her face.

"It was nothing, yeah," He sighed, massaging his inflamed throat.

"I call it Karma," The pink-haired kunoichi smiled as she sifted through the bottles on the metal tray before selecting the appropriate one. A large blue-labelled bottle in hand, she made her way back towards the bed.

"Call it what you want, yeah. Karma doesn't exist," Deidara replied with some conviction. "Or then how is it I'm still alive?" A slight smirk hugged the corner of his lips as if to further emphasise that he was living proof that karma did not exist.

"Well maybe this is your punishment?" She teased, her emerald eyes dancing.

"Hmph".

There was a lull in conversation and Sakura resumed the healing process, focusing on knitting sinew and bone together, her mind wholly focused on her task or would have been if it were not for a niggling voice in her brain that continued the conversation inside her head. She sighed, hoping that the voice would do her a favour and shut the hell up. She had enough to think about without having to worry about witty comebacks to hurl in the Akatsuki's direction.

Unfortunately for Sakura the little voice did not shut up, in fact it became progressively louder given that it had voiced an interesting question for the medic. She mulled over the single thought that had somehow lodged itself at the forefront of her brain. Even though the conversation was long over, Sakura lips moved with a will of their own and so it was with some surprise that she heard herself say:

"Do you believe it?"

The blonde-haired shinobi looked up in surprise. It was clear that he had absolutely no idea what she was talking about. She should probably explain herself more fully next time instead of shooting out random questions like a quizmaster.

"Believe what yeah?" Deidara's full undivided attention was focused upon the medic now. A slight crease crinkled his brow.

Sakura hoped she was not as inept at hiding her embarrassment as she was at controlling her temper. The question definitely fell under the personal questions category. It was not too late to drop the question, to lie and make up some excuse but Sakura decided that she might as well continue, foolish though it may be.

"Do you believe that what you're doing; the organisation, everything, is wrong?"

Understanding blossomed in his azure eyes; he knew that she was referring to his comment about still being alive after all that he had done. His reply was a while in coming. The expression on his face was difficult to read. Was he angry, shocked or something else? Sakura wondered if she'd gone too far.

"I didn't mean it like that, yeah".

"Then-," she began hesitantly, halting after the first word. It probably wasn't such a good idea to ask him what he really meant after all. She bit her tongue – figuratively – but she'd said enough. Deidara knew perfectly well what she meant. The unspoken question hung between them frailly like a thin veil of silk. It took only a few words to rip it apart.

"Look, just stop trying to figure me out, yeah!" Deidara growled angrily. "I have enough questions forced on me every day! What is it to you what I think? You're from Konoha, yeah. Why do you even pretend like you care?"

Stillness crept over the room. Sakura could hear the birds outside, the tramp of boots down the corridor, she could even count her own heartbeat. Sakura did not answer because she _had_ no answer. He was right. He was right about everything except that she pretended to care.

Of course she didn't care but just because she didn't care it didn't mean that she couldn't be curious. She could tell that this answer would not go down well with the Akatsuki though so she chose to say nothing, preferring not to be accused of lying. Her perfect mood had vanished and yet she had no energy to argue.

"What about you, yeah?" Deidara asked abruptly.

"What?"

"Why would you choose this mission, yeah. You're not even from the Sand".

Deidara's brow knit together in confusion. It was Sakura's turn to struggle with an answer. He had voiced the very question she'd dearly love to know the answer to.

"I didn't," she said slowly, almost to herself.

"Oh?" The Akatsuki wore a perplexed frown.

She shook her head, waves of pink strands cascading over her alarmed face. There was a time and a place for forgetting where she was and who she was with and this was not it. She refused to say any more, keeping her lips firmly sealed. She was not about to reveal information to him.

She took a few deep steadying breaths; fresh oxygen flooded through her respiratory system, calming her thoughts.

"Look, if you want me to go I'll leave," Sakura sighed.

Almost instantly, Sakura regretted saying those words. If she could snatch at them and force them back she would have done. But it was too late. He'd already heard. A few extra lines appeared on his forehead and the medic realised that she couldn't have done worse if she'd tried. Tsunade; Konoha for that matter was counting on her to help the Sand but more importantly, discover the reason behind being summoned there to administer medical treatment on a notorious criminal when there were other perfectly able medics in Suna – unless they had all caught a mysteriously virus upon the Akatsuki's capture.

No one likes being lied to and Sakura was no exception. The lie about her superior medical skills didn't cover it, not by a long shot. It was like covering an elephant with a towel. The fact that her patient had even begun to suspect that there was something amiss only strengthened her resolve to uncover the truth.

"It's ok, yeah," He mumbled.

She applied a wet cloth to his wounds, sponging away the dirt before plunging it into the bowl of steaming water once more. His ribs looked particularly nasty and he hissed in pain as the material gently pressed up against his wound.

"Sorry," Sakura apologised as she applied the cloth once again and he winced visibly.

Minutes passed in absolute silence before Deidara spoke again.

"I'm sorry about before, yeah."

Sakura just looked at him.

"I-" He paused. "I shouldn't have said-" Sakura had a sneaking suspicion that he'd never apologised to anyone before. She bit her lip, wondering what that meant. Was it wrong for her to like the possibly nonexistent meaning behind his apology?

"Do I look upset?" Sakura asked.

"No, but-"

"Well then, there's nothing to worry about," she said brightly, trying to shake off her unease. She had finished tending to his ribs and started on his arm. She was almost done.

His brow furrowed briefly, not knowing what to make of her. Sakura wasn't entirely surprised. She didn't know what to make of it either. It was almost as if she had forgotten who he was and who he was after.

A sudden movement made her flinch, but his hand was gone almost before she knew it was there. She touched a few strands of her silky locks uncertainly. Had he really just done that?

"Sand," he said, motioning to a few flaky grains which he'd just brushed out of her hair, and confirming that she hadn't just imagined it. "It gets everywhere, yeah".

Her heart hammering wildly, Sakura tied the knot on the bandage and left the room as quickly as she dared. Once outside, she leant heavily against the closed door, breathing deeply in an attempt to control her erratic thoughts.

She could still feel his hand in her hair; feel his piercing blue eyes upon her and his voice repeating itself over and over like a mantra. _Sand, it gets everywhere, yeah._

The small part of her that wasn't dwelling on the scene that had just taken place, vaguely noted that the guards were watching her curiously but Sakura suspected they were just hoping she wouldn't demolish the entire wall this time.

Suddenly aware of the many pairs of eyes watching her, the Konoha medic exited the building with as much dignity as she could manage, attempting to forget the cool hand that had softly brushed her cheek.

* * *

Sakura rinsed her hands tiredly in the stone basin and dried them quickly on the soft, snowy towel – that had been carefully placed on the towel rack that morning – and watched it slip through her fingers and flutter carelessly to the floor. She made no attempt to retrieve it. Her reflection in the great oval mirror above the sink revealed how tired she was. The tell-tale shadows under her eyes were the most obvious sign but little things like the way her mouth pulled down at the corner and the way that her emerald eyes sparkled with some unknown emotion were the only indicators – to an outsider – that something was not quite right.

Was it really that noticeable? Sakura touched her face anxiously. If it was then everyone had just been too polite to mention it. She thought she had been clever at hiding her weariness but apparently not. For what felt like the hundredth time she examined her cheek, searching for signs that the Akatsuki had touched her face. Try as she might, she hadn't, _couldn't_ forget about it.

She had spent the remainder of the afternoon locked up in her hotel room, forcing her brain to go over the facts again and again and it had only been in the last half hour that she'd come to a decision. In fact, she was certain that this was the only thing she could do right now.

Sakura took one last glance at her reflection before frowning and reaching for her make-up bag. It was important to look presentable at the very least tonight. She sighed. It was time to go.

It was much darker when the medic ventured outside once more. She must have stayed in the hotel longer than she'd thought. The chill of the desert rose up to meet her and Sakura pulled her cloak tightly about her as she set off down the street. The moon had fully risen by the time she reached the block of apartments she'd been looking for. The pale glow cast an ethereal glow on the surrounding buildings but shinobi were unperturbed by such things, she reminded herself sternly. In no time at all she'd reached the second floor of the apartment block and stood silently outside the door with a big brass "34" glued proudly to it.

Now came the tricky part. Sakura could not do this without Kakashi-sensei but how was she to let him know what without alerting Naruto? Naruto was not subtle and she needed someone with a bit more – well basically the opposite of Naruto. If he was aware of what she intended to do, he would surely come along, with or without permission. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea after all. She would have waited until tomorrow but they would be leaving to locate the second Akatsuki and there wouldn't be time.

Sakura sighed. Well if she couldn't get anyone else to come, she'd just have to go by herself. She turned away from the door and marched off, so intent on her thoughts that she walked headlong into something soft and solid.

"Well Sakura, to what do I owe the pleasure?" A deep sounding voice rumbled from somewhere above her head.

"Kaka-sensei?" Sakura asked in disbelief, blushing furiously as she untangled herself from his arms.

"Who else did you think it was?"

"I don't know," she replied, trying to get the awkward memory of her and her sensei embracing out of her head. She forced herself to focus on more important things. It was crucial she got this right and meeting Kakashi outside certainly meant that Naruto was no longer a problem.

"Sensei, I need your h-," She swallowed. "I mean, I need to meet with the Kazekage now".

"Gaara?" Kakashi frowned. "What's wrong, Sakura?"

"I don't know if Tsunade-sama told you but I was requested by the Sand to take this mission, to heal the Akatsuki member".

"I figured as much". Her former sensei sighed deeply. "The Sand has perfectly capable medics for the job. It sounded suspicious from the start".

"I have to know why, Kaka-sensei! The Hokage only agreed to me taking this mission so I could find out why, I'm sure of it!"

"We'd have to go now," Kakashi spoke, almost as if to himself. Sakura nodded.

There was a quiet pause before he spoke once more.

"Alright," he sighed. "This had better not take too long. I still haven't finished the latest Icha Icha novel".

Sakura smiled. Paperwork or no paperwork, the time had come for her to speak to the Kazekage. Kakashi would know what to do. She didn't think she could leave these questions unanswered any longer. And Gaara had a lot to answer for.

* * *

**A/N: Please review :)**


	5. Circles Within Circles

**A/N:** This is the quickest (and longest) chapter I've ever posted! Hooray! I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to writing the next few chapters!

Please tell me what you think! I'd love to hear your comments and theories!

My wonderful reviewers, this chapter is dedicated to you :)

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

* * *

**Chapter 5: Circles within Circles**

"Halt!" A surly pair of guards barred the entrance to a steep flight of stairs that led upwards into the tallest building in Sunagakure. "What business do you have with the Kazekage?"

Sakura sighed. Dealing with extra security was not something she had anticipated when she had decided to meet the Kazekage but in all honesty, what did she expect? Of course security would still be on red alert after the attempt on Gaara's life. This was just another complication. Hopefully just an annoyance and nothing more.

"We-" the pink-haired medic began.

"Do you have an appointment?" The first guard asked gruffly. Due to the lateness of the hour, the guard was right in thinking that they did not have an appointment and he made it his business to let them know exactly what he was thinking.

"No but-"

"No appointment, no admittance" He stated, his tone very final. Sakura glared at him, chakra already flowing through her tightly clenched fists.

"Easy, Sakura" Kakashi said in an undertone, barely managing to keep the amusement out of his voice. "We're not here to intimidate – or provoke – the guards".

Sakura unfurled her fists regretfully but Kakashi-sensei was right. They would accomplish nothing by attacking sentries; except perhaps a night in a cell and the answer to her question would be even further from their grasp than before.

She exhaled noisily. This was why she'd persuaded Kakashi to come along – not that he'd needed much persuading. Someone needed to keep a cool head. The copy-cat ninja raised his voice slightly so that his words could be heard clearly by both guards.

"It's too important to wait. We have to see the Kazekage now" He reasoned. Sakura wondered if this was stretching the truth a bit too much. Sure, she needed to see Gaara now if she wanted Kakashi to help her but her question could wait a few more days.

"Like I said-" The first one began again and Sakura felt an overwhelming urge to hit him but before she even moved a muscle, another voice echoed down the stairs.

"Sakura? Kakashi?"

She looked up in surprise, allowing a slow smile to form upon her lips. It was Kankuro; the painted wonder and Gaara's elder brother. Surely he could convince the guards to let them pass?

After a couple of minutes Sakura's suspicions proved correct and before long they had entered the Kazekage's office. A large window panned an entire wall revealing a bright display of stars that twinkled merrily above the village which had taken on a mystical quality –the shadowy buildings many different hues of grey and silver. Sakura tore her eyes away from the beautiful sight and faced the brightly lit interior of the Kazekage's office.

Seated at a large desk directly opposite the colossal window was the Fifth Kazekage; Gaara. Perhaps it was to do with the contrast between his dusky red hair and pasty white skin but Sakura thought that Gaara looked more pale and drawn than she remembered.

"Hatake Kakashi, and Haruno Sakura" Gaara began. "This is an unusual hour for visiting…" His words trailed off expectantly and his eyes watched them with faint curiosity.

"Yes, sorry for the inconvenience. We-" Sakura began uncertainly, slightly thrown by the uniform and wishing that she'd thought through what she was going to say before marching into the Kazekage's office. Her brain whirled frantically as she sought for a suitable phrase and Kakashi sensing her difficulty decided to intervene.

"How is the interrogation of the prisoner coming along?" Kakashi asked mildly in the tone of voice he might use if he were inquiring about the weather.

Gaara sighed heavily, passing a hand over his tired eyes. "Not as well as we had hoped" he admitted. "We have collected some information – with surprising difficulty I might add – but for all our effort the information we have gained is practically useless".

"Useless?" Sakura enquired.

"Yes. He refuses to reveal anything on the Akatsuki. Any data we have collected is considered relatively minor and based on the fact that he has resisted our questioning so far, we cannot be sure that what he does tell us is one hundred percent reliable".

Sakura frowned slightly. She never presumed to know Deidara intimately but she had a faint inkling that he wasn't altogether happy with the organisation he was a part of, so she found it distinctly odd that he would cling to their secrets so fiercely. Then again, perhaps not so. He was the stubbonest person she'd ever met. She shuddered slightly as she recalled the savage wounds that riddled his body after every interrogation.

"If he has not cracked within the week then he will be considered of no further use to us" Gaara continued.

Sakura barely stifled a gasp as she caught the double meaning of those words. Her hand flew to her mouth in horror and she could hear her blood pumping furiously in her ears. Through her alarm – both at the implications of those words and her own reaction – Sakura mentally chided herself. Why was she so shocked? Of course they would kill him. She hated herself for being so naïve.

Fortunately her behaviour had gone unnoticed and Sakura returned to the conversation just in time to hear Kakashi say:

"And what about your medics?"

Gaara's brow creased slightly, ruining his perfectly smooth skin.

"What of them? If Sakura requires assistance she need only ask" His turquoise eyes bored into her jade ones. "That's what you came here for, right? To ask for assistance?"

Perhaps Sakura imagined the look in his eyes that suggested that he highly doubted that was what they came for; it vanished as quickly as it had arrived. However, it was the answer to her sensei's question that unnerved her more than anything else. Her brow furrowed. From the moment she had undertaken her mission she had been under the impression that the Sand medics refused to heal Deidara, perhaps because he had tried to assassinate the Kazekage. After what Gaara had just said, she saw that it was not so. So then, why _was_ she chosen to heal Deidara?

"No I-" She stumbled over her reply, acutely aware that he was waiting for an answer. "I don't-"

"I think you misunderstand my question" Kakashi continued mildly. "Sakura is not requesting for extra help".

"What then?"

"We are under the impression that-"

Sakura clenched her fists out of frustration. This was getting them nowhere!

"Why did you request for me to heal Deidara?" The words burst angrily from her lips and she glared at Gaara, for the moment forgetting he was the Kazekage.

Gaara's dark-ringed eyes narrowed at her outburst and Sakura wondered if she'd gone too far. In hindsight, it was painfully easy to see that keeping quiet would have definitely been the better option but at least this way they could get straight to the point without having to tiptoe around the problem like frightened little mice. And Sakura was not a mouse.

"Deidara" Gaara said softly, his gaze searching. "How is it that you know his name when it took us three days to get even that small bit of information out of him? I wonder what else he's told you".

Sakura flinched. His tone of voice had taken on a distinct accusing tone and suddenly she felt as if she were at school again caught in an act of wrong-doing. She hadn't meant to say his name. The words had rolled off her tongue effortlessly, so naturally it was almost like those words belonged there. She wondered exactly when it had started to feel right saying his name.

"That's-" Sakura said, the urgency clear in her tone. "That's not the- Just answer the question!"

Gaara's eyes widened in shock for a second before they narrowed dangerously. It was clear from his expression that he suspected Konoha of treachery. Sakura truly couldn't have done much worse if she'd tried.

"What the hell are you talking about? Gaara seethed. He stood up angrily. "Your Hokage was the one who insisted we let you heal him!"

There was a stunned silence. Sakura felt her body temperature drop a few degrees as waves of shock crashed over her. She was numb with disbelief. She stared at Gaara unseeing; unable to make sense of his words, unable to make sense of the madness.

She glanced over at Kakashi but his face was unsurprisingly impassive. It was considered extremely out of character for Kakashi to reveal his true feelings; his face was as difficult to read as the mask that covered it. On closer inspection his features were uncharacteristically grave but only someone such as Sakura who was used to his eccentricities could have noticed.

"Sakura, you still have the scroll?" Kakashi jolted her out of her reverie.

"Yes, of course" She replied automatically, reaching into her pouch to retrieve it. If there was one thing she prided herself on it was her organisational skills; she had brought the scroll tonight just as a precaution. Wordlessly she handed the seemingly innocent scroll to Gaara which he received with slight skepticism.

A few seconds passed or perhaps a minute in which Sakura watched the Fifth Kazekage with baited breath. His frown became more and more pronounced as his eyes moved further down the scroll. Finally he set it down on the table with the most pronounced sigh Sakura had ever heard.

"It seems like we've both been deceived" He began slowly. "This scroll is written in handwriting so similar to my own that even my closest advisors would be fooled and as for the Hokage's-" He reached into one of the many drawers and withdrew a second scroll. "Would you agree that this is in her handwriting?"

Sakura squinted at the scroll, instantly recognising her shishou's familiar scrawl. Something was clearly not right here. Had someone infiltrated both villages without the knowledge of either? It certainly was possible she mused but what could it mean?

She nodded in confirmation. "I know she'd never have sent this but it looks like hers".

"There are ways of copying another's handwriting" Kakashi input. "Anyone could have done this".

"All the evidence points to that someone has infiltrated both our villages!" Gaara said alarmed. "But what doesn't make sense is that we would have found out sooner or later so I can't accept that throwing seeds of mistrust between our nations was their main intent."

"Then perhaps doubt?" Sakura suggested.

"Hmm, maybe". Gaara replied, not entirely convinced.

"Either way, Tsunade-sama has to know" Sakura began, turning to her former sensei. "Should one of us go back to report this? It's pretty clear that the lines of communication have been compromised".

"There's no need for that I think" Kakashi gave her a one-eyed smile. "We have other ways to send and receive messages".

"Good" Gaara said leaning back in his chair and sighing. "I'll have to keep a closer watch on my members of staff. I don't have to tell you how worrying this is. I anticipated a lot of things when I became Kazekage but never this. Hopefully we'll get to the bottom of this soon".

Shortly after, Sakura and Kakashi left the Kazekage's office, their hearts weighed down with the weight of so many newly arisen questions. Sakura had thought that Gaara looked very tired and worn. Next to him she looked positively energetic. She wondered if it was partly down to his bijuu – Shukaku – constantly keeping him awake. She shuddered to think how she'd look if she had so little sleep.

"So how are we going to send the message back to Konoha?" Sakura sleepily asked.

They were walking down a deserted street; dark heavy clouds adorned most of the skyline, blocking out most of the moonlight and making it damn near impossible to see.

"I thought we'd ask for help from a friend" Her sensei replied.

He proceeded to form the summoning technique and before long a small pug wearing a blue headband and jacket materialised in front of them, revealed suddenly to them in a rare gleam of moonlight.

"What is it, Kakashi?" A deep gruff voice emitted from the small ninken.

Leaving no time for pleasantries, Kakashi launched into an explanation of the situation to Pakkun who sat quietly on his haunches until-

"So you expect me to be a messenger boy?" He grumbled.

"I'll give you a whole box of dog treats" Kakashi bribed. Pakkun continued to glare for a few more seconds before his shoulders sagged.

"Alright, alright. I'll take the stupid message".

He left looking rather disgruntled at being designated for a task he thought was clearly a waste of his time.

"You'll make him fat, you know" Sakura smiled, wondering if the little pug could be any more adorable.

"Well he'll have earned a few extra laps with me a day then" Kakashi laughed.

"Kaka-sensei?" Sakura asked.

"Hm?"

"Do you really think Naruto should go with you tomorrow?" She asked, voicing a question that had been on her mind for a while. "What if it's an ambush?"

"I wouldn't worry Sakura. Wherever he is, he's probably long gone. This is probably just a wild goose chase. But whenever there's even the slightest chance we might capture one of the Akatsuki, we have to take it".

"I understand" Sakura said, unable to shake an uneasy feeling that their mission might fail. "Good luck tomorrow".

"Goodnight, Sakura".

* * *

The harsh light of day pierced through the thin membrane of Sakura's eyelids. Wearily she opened her jade eyes to witness the light of the midday sun streaming down through a gap in her beige curtains and onto her face. She winced, automatically reaching for the little digital clock which was perched on her bedside table and did a double take. But there was no mistaking it; she had slept in!

"Holy crap!" Sakura exclaimed, almost falling out of her bed in her hurry to get up. It was past midday; she was supposed to be at the medical centre in half an hour. Plus she'd missed saying goodbye to her friends before they set out to track the other Akatsuki. She had no idea when she would see them again, let alone if they were alright! The mission must have put more of a strain on her than she'd thought and although she was loathe to admit it, she had really needed the sleep.

There was no time for her routine morning shower but considering the dreadful state of her hair, Sakura decided that some needs must come first, even at the expense of being considerably late. Unfortunately attacking the birds nest on top of her head still left her room to dwell on her friends leaving… and Deidara. Disturbingly, both were vying for the majority of her thought-space but it was a tie!

It was true that after her late rendezvous with the Kazekage, Deidara had been occupying her thoughts far more than usual. Although she knew that Deidara's death was a definate eventuality, she had never thought about it as much as she had now and it was probably due to this that she had slept so little and therefore slept in. She was stuck in a mental limbo as far as her thoughts and actions on the matter were concerned.

Of two things she was sure. One, that she could not forgive herself if Deidara died. And two, that she could not willingly betray her village or put Naruto in danger no matter how much she cared about the guy.

Oh God! Her spoon, laden with cereal stopped inches from her mouth and she very nearly spilt milk over her clean top. The thought had come as naturally as breathing yet it was only once she'd thought those words like that that she actually realised. She _did_ care! How could she have missed it before?

Yeah sure, the guy played havoc with her emotions and she admitted that she did find him undeniably hot – however unprofessional and inappropriate that may be – but _caring_? That was on a different level altogether.

She was still struggling over the concept as she exited the room, so preoccupied that she almost forgot her medical kit in the process. Ten minutes later she arrived at the sandy building, dusty and out of breath. She was half an hour late to the session but Deidara never mentioned her lateness. Of course she wasn't even sure he knew she was late, let alone know what time it was unless he had a watch hidden somewhere. Somehow she doubted it.

The meeting last night, her friends leaving for their mission and the fact that she might care for an enemy of Konoha left her so preoccupied that it wasn't until her eyes met his that she remembered. The embarrassing incident the day before may have seemed like a lifetime ago yet it still caused a faint blush to spread across Sakura's cheeks.

It was only then that she noticed the horrible state he was in. Gaara hadn't been joking when he'd said they'd get the information out of him in five days.

As she examined his numerous injuries she was struck by a sense of déjà vu. The scene was eerily similar to the first night except that this time he was conscious – barely – and she couldn't look upon him with the same disgust and dislike. A wave of guilt flooded her being. She should have been here earlier.

"Well, I would say that you're improving but that would be a lie" Sakura sighed, almost to herself.

She knew that no one lasted long under prolonged torture and in spite of her frequent healing sessions he was becoming weaker by the day. Even if she had fully healed him each day – which was impossible anyway as the body needed time to recover – he would still lose strength. There had not been dire injuries for a couple of days, just a few broken ribs and a broken arm but Sakura had known that wouldn't last. They would keep pushing him for answers until he gave in or died.

"No surprise there, yeah" Deidara said. Sakura's eyes widened at his attempt to make a joke. She hadn't meant for him to hear that. In fact she was surprised he could even talk. The pain must be almost unbearable.

"Well, lets see what needs healing today" She said in a falsely cheery voice, partly to hide her shock, partly to detract from what had just been said.

"You don't need to pretend for me, yeah" The words came out slightly wrong as if he'd chewed and bit them off. Then she noticed the swelled broken jaw.

Automatically she called upon her reserves of chakra and set about reducing the swelling before healing the bone itself. Her hands positively glowed with chakra as they traced his jaw line. Deidara closed his eyes, enjoying the cool touch of her hands against the fiery pain in his mouth. Did he notice the way her hands lingered longer than necessary on his lower lip?

Sakura raised an eyebow. "Who said I was pretending?"

"I did" Deidara replied as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Suddenly the air became much more restricted. They were much too close. Sakura's breath hitched in her throat when she realised her lips were only inches from his. Once again the situation had switched from being strictly medical to something else. A shiver of excitement ran down her spine at the thought followed by anger. She hated that she cared. Deidara had no place in her life and if she let him, he would ruin everything.

Some people might describe this feeling as love, but – she mentally shook her head – people were so quick to use that word these days. She'd known him less than a week. It was clearly infatuation and no more.

Sakura leant back and sighed. Ignoring the butterflies in her stomach, she noted the rest of his injuries with a strictly professional eye – or at least she liked to think so.

"So, we have some minor stomach wounds, two fractured ribs and a dislocated shoulder" the flustered medic said, more to lift the heavy atmosphere than anything. She wished the Suna shinobi had installed a fan or air conditioning for the room was stiflingly hot.

"Tell me something, yeah?" Deidara broke the silence with a strained request after a few minutes of Sakura examining his lungs. One of them was punctured by the fractured ribs; the thin lining surrounding the lung had been damaged and already a fair amount of blood had entered it.

"Like what?" Sakura asked, focusing more on his lungs than himself as she set about healing them.

"Anything yeah. Just something for me to focus on. Your life, your friends… why you became a kunoichi, yeah" Deidara replied, wincing visibly as he spoke.

"Alright" Pushing the fractured ribs back into place, healing them and the lung was proving very painful for the Akatsuki so she agreed, more to help him through the pain than anything else. "But you have to tell me your side too".

There was no reply from the bed; shallow breathing and his fluttering eyelids were his response. Sakura sighed and decided to begin anyway.

"Um, well I became a kunoichi because-" She began. "Well it seems like the dumbest reason ever now but me and my next door neighbour, Ino, we were rivals of sorts. But it was also because I wanted to be good at something for a change, you know? I wanted to be strong for once and I dunno, I guess I wanted to impress people."

"Sounds stupid, doesn't it?" She laughed, recalling how young and naïve she'd been then. "But I've never regretted it and I care more about protecting those I love these days than some stupid rivalry. I suppose it's a good thing I'm a medic-nin then".

The ribs were almost full healed now. As Sakura's pale hands brushed lightly across his torso and she couldn't help but fantasise about touching his chest under different circumstances. The embarrassing incident yesterday, as she'd dubbed it, and the near kiss today were things beyond her comprehension. He was so volatile, so alien to her. She had no idea what he was going to do next.

Once she had completed healing his ribs she moved on to his dislocated shoulder. He appeared to be functioning better now, at least enough to hold a conversation.

"Anyway, your turn"

"My what, yeah?" Deidara asked, slight confusion marring his handsome face.

"To tell me your story" Sakura replied boldly. "I told you mine so it's only fair".

"Oh, yeah" His face was momentarily blank. "I was in too much pain to understand exactly what it was you said, yeah".

Sakura sighed but decided to let it go. In truth, she was a little disappointed she didn't get to hear his tale.

She leant further forward, her rose-coloured strands brushing softly over his bruised, battered arm. It was difficult to get into the right position to set his shoulder without it being intimate. Sakura took a deep breath and exhaled.

"You look like you're enjoying yourself, yeah" Deidara's taunting tone reached her ears. Her hands slipped on his shoulder. The arrogance was back again. Why was she not surprised?

"I am not! You arrogant prick!" Sakura refrained from slapping him.

He laughed, sending a pleasurable shiver down her spine.

"Yeah, yeah".

Sakura did not have to touch her cheeks to know that they were red-hot and inflamed. And from his expression it wasn't difficult to deduce that he'd noticed too! Damn him!

She chose that moment to pop his shoulder back into place. It made a sickly crunch and he groaned in pain. Score 1 to Sakura!

"There! That's it for today" Sakura wore an impish grin as she danced across the room to the exit. "See you tomorrow!"

The door clanged shut ominously, signalling the departure of his one bright spark in a bleak future. Once she left there was nothing to distract him from his aching bones and throbbing wounds and only further torture to look forward to until she brought him back from the darkness once more.

Deidara rolled onto his side, feeling every ache and twist in his body. It was immensely satisfying to wind her up. He knew exactly how to push her buttons. He felt curiously elated; he loved how he got to her.

He felt a slight twinge of guilt when recalling her story however. Yes, he lied to her but his story wasn't something she should hear anyway. His did not involve a cute little rivalry between best friends and he did not want to taint her innocence with stories of his past. For a kunoichi she was surprisingly naïve.

* * *

**A/N**: So what's everyone's theories on who's been sending the mysterious scrolls? What do you think will happen to Naruto, Kakashi and the others on their mission to locate Sasori? And whats going to happen between Deidara and Sakura?

Theories, people! I'd love to hear them!

Please tell me what you thought of the chapter! :)


	6. The Blurred Line

**A/N:** Here it is folks! The chapter you've all been waiting for! Enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

* * *

**Chapter 6: The Blurred Line**

"Ugh" Deidara grunted as the final blow hit him squarely in the jaw. He ignored the throbbing sensation the punch had elicited as warm blood trickled down his neck but he brushed the pain aside. White-hot anger surged through his body, uncontainable and incontrollable. A thin line deep inside his core had snapped and now there was nothing to prevent his rage from brimming over.

He shot the sand shinobi an intense glare, full of anger and hatred. How fucking dare they? He was one of the Akatsuki! It was insulting that any of these shinobi – shinobi who were considerably weaker than he was – dared to treat him with such little respect! It was beyond infuriating!

Deidara struggled against his restraints furiously and the men laughed at his futile attempt to free himself. He wondered if that had earned him another round of beating for now the shinobi were advancing towards him, all signs of mirth gone. However, they seemed to be satisfied for now. Several pairs of hands forced him roughly to his feet and frogmarched him from the room, back to his cell.

Unfortunately, the solitude the cell provided was no comfort to the Akatsuki. Left alone, it was far easier to give in to his poisonous thoughts. He clenched his fists angrily, shaking with uncontrolled rage.

It was unclear even to his own mind what the catalyst for his anger had been. It was most likely a combination of many things, for Deidara had felt his anger and frustration growing day by day at his situation. It was inevitable that he would snap. He _had_ snapped!

But even Deidara could not stay angry forever. Slowly, the flames began to die down from the lack of fuel to keep it burning and other thoughts slowly crept back into his mind. Such as the medic. She would be here soon, he realised with an unexpected jolt.

The anger flared briefly as he considered the matter. What the hell was wrong with him? He had much more important things to think about than some stupid medic. She was from Konoha for fuck's sake! The only other time he had felt so cheated, so powerless was when that damn Itachi had tricked him into joining the Akatsuki. He had sworn never again to be at the mercy of another person like that!

He glared at the faintly glowing chakra bands on his wrists. It was impossible to summon chakra with these bands on; God, he'd tried enough times!

"Damn it!" He growled, biting into the bands in an attempt to physically tear them off his wrists. "Damn!"

Unfortunately, Sakura chose that moment to saunter into the room, holding a small clipboard close to her chest.

Whatever Deidara thought of the pink-haired medic, now was certainly not the time for her to intrude. Unaware of this fact, Sakura began to sift through the medicine bottles on the medical tray and therefore was rather taken-aback when he sat up abruptly with undisguised fury written across his face.

Why was she still here? His eyes blazed furiously. Despite his anger, Deidara couldn't help but notice the way her outfit hugged her body, accentuating her curves. He shook his head angrily. Damn her!

Questioning jade eyes, a hint of concern in their depths watched him carefully as the medic edged closer. Her hand – cool and comforting – touched his skin briefly and he flinched as though he'd been burned.

"Deidara, what?" Sakura's tone somehow managed to be alluring even when her voice was full of confusion.

He sighed internally, wondering when it was that they had skipped the formalities and begun to refer to each other on first-name basis. He grabbed her wrist as she made to sweep his hair out of his eyes. He did not need to be mothered too!

It was little more than a second that Deidara held onto her wrist, but in that one second an understanding passed between them. His chakra band stood out clearly on his wrist, the only thing between them. He drew a deep breath and sighed in an attempt to dispel his anger.

"Get out".

His voice was full of frustration.

"What?" Sakura asked in disbelief.

He clenched his jaw, hating that he had to repeat himself. "I said get out!"

He stood up, ignoring a fresh wave of pain from his wounds. The anger had returned and along with it, the frustration and helplessness that threatened to consume him.

"No" Sakura said resolutely, her arms folded across her chest in an act of defiance.

Now it was his turn to be surprised. "What?"

"One of us still has a job to do here. I'm not leaving" Sakura stood her ground, refusing to be intimidated by this man.

"Damn you" He growled after a few seconds as he admitted defeat.

He had little choice but to let Sakura do her job and heal him. He had already lost a lot of blood and without his chakra he was practically powerless. As she worked he remembered all the conversations they'd held in the past week. Not for the first time, he wondered what her part was in all of this. It was inconceivable to think that she actually cared. No, the most likely conclusion to all of this was that she was rooting around for a bit of information herself. After all it made sense that Konoha would want an informant within the Sand at such a time. Damn! He hated Konoha more than ever.

One conversation in particular filtered back to him.

_Your hands-_

_They're a bloodline limit right?_

He could see why they'd interested her. It was an uncommon bloodline limit to begin with and he was the last one. He'd felt her trace the string binding the mouth on his chest too when she thought he was unconscious but if she thought he'd reveal that little secret to her, then she was wrong.

No-one had ever cared about Deidara in his life and he liked it that way. He'd never needed to rely on anything but himself and his art before. Perhaps that was why he couldn't stand the thought of developing a relationship with Sakura. Unfortunately he couldn't take his eyes off her. The cute way she bit her lip when nervous, the vanilla-scented smell of her shampoo, how her expressive her jade eyes were and her tight little ass.

Still, even that wasn't enough of a distraction to rid him of the constant worry that formed an unpleasant knot in his gut whenever he thought of the next round of interrogation. He wasn't sure how much more he could take.

Sakura sighed. "Whats wrong, Deidara?"

Those words ignited the fire inside him once more. How could she ever comprehend what he was feeling?

"What's wrong? _What's_ wrong, yeah? I'm lying here fucking bleeding and you ask me what's wrong?!" Deidara spat.

She stared at him, wide eyed.

"What the hell is wrong with you, yeah?" He muttered after a moment, disbelievingly.

"Maybe you should take a look at yourself! I'm not the one with the bipolar disorder!" Sakura glared.

He laughed at that one, ignoring the hint of madness in it. If his mood swings were bad, then what were hers?

"Why are you still here, yeah?" He had asked this question once before but that didn't stop him from asking again. He had spent sleepless nights agonising over this question but no matter how much it infuriated him, it was better than pondering over his fate. All his plan for escape were useless.

"You know why!" Sakura yelled, obviously unhappy that the conversation had taken this unpleasant turn.

"No I don't actually!" Deidara countered. "You walk in here with your smiles and pretences and expect me to believe that you even care! Why the hell are you doing this to me, yeah?"

She shook her head violently and backed away, disconcerted by his words. As much as she wanted to tell him she cared, it was taboo. She wished she knew what the right choice was, if one even existed in a situation like this. She felt lost. She was stuck in a lose-lose situation where every choice was a mistake.

"I told you before, I didn't ask for this" She answered slowly, completely divided when it came to answering his question. Wrong answer!

"Then why don't you leave, yeah!" He roared. "I knew it! I knew you were only-"

"Deidara, please listen-"

"No. I've heard enough, yeah" Deidara cut her off, making it perfectly clear that the conversation was over. But Sakura wasn't used to giving in that easy.

"What is it with you?" She asked annoyance seeping into her tone as she threw her arms heavenward. "What happened to make you incapable of trusting anyone?!"

"I don't make a habit of trusting enemies, yeah" he responded heatedly.

"Is that all I am to you?" Sakura asked unable to keep the tinge of sadness from her tone. "An enemy?"

Deidara paused for a second, noticing her sorrow and when he spoke it was in a softer tone.

"I am an enemy of Konoha" He gestured to her headband as if to remind her of where she was from. "Therefore we are enemies by default". There was no point in arguing over it. It was just the way things were.

The expression on Sakura's face was hard to read; a range of emotions passed over it before she finally settled on hard determination. He was mesmerised by the jade eyes that watched him unblinkingly as she reached up to her hair and unravelled the headband in one swift motion. Neither of them heard it clatter noisily to the ground. Sakura was breathing heavily as her deliciously pink hair fell from its bonds and framed her face, accentuating her exotic green eyes which were currently alight with emotion. It was all Deidara could do to watch her in stunned silence.

"Now what is there between us?" Sakura asked, her eyes blazing.

It took a few moments for Deidara to comprehend those words and when he did he began to wonder why they were having this completely nonsensical – nonsensical but wonderful – conversation.

"Don't be stupid!" He said disbelief colouring his tone. "You-"

He was silenced by her kiss. It was surprisingly hesitant for such a bold move, as if Sakura hadn't quite made up her mind but Deidara could sense an underlying desire that she couldn't quite suppress as her lips moulded into his.

Surprised as he was, that was all the prompting Deidara needed. With a growl of anticipation he responded to her kiss, while his arms found her waist and half-pulled her onto his lap. Gods, how he had wanted this! The two were caught in a moment – purely sensual and lustful. Sakura was blown away by the sheer rawness of feeling emanating from him. He was all around her. The intoxicating taste of his lips enveloped her fully. She could feel his hands upon her waist. And then in a flash, it was over.

Deidara worked hard to stifle his disappointment as the pink-haired medic drew back, the reality of the situation registering on her face. But he was pleased to see that she couldn't quite keep a smile from forming on her soft, pink, perfectly-kissable lips. As Sakura seemed momentarily lost for words, Deidara was the first to regain the power of speech.

"You're insane, yeah" He muttered, still stunned by what had just occurred yet liking it a lot. More than he would dare to admit.

"Maybe" She almost smiled, her lips still tingling from the heat of their kiss.

"I'm serious, yeah!" He struggled over the desire to kiss her again. He was a dead man, he reminded himself. He didn't deserve her. "You should never have-"

"I know" She cut across him regretfully. "We should probably pretend that this didn't-"

"Yeah" He said, hiding the disappointment in his tone.

"It's getting late" Sakura said awkwardly.

"Yeah, you should-"

"I'll just go" She replied hastily as she slid off the bed and rushed out of the door desperate to hide the embarrassment on her face.

The door clanged ominously behind her.

* * *

_Ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod! _

Sakura closed the door to her apartment shakily and slid to the floor, shocked by the sheer nerve of what she'd done. Her keys fell from her outstretched hands to the floor but she made no effort to retrieve them. The feel of his lips were forever imprinted on hers and she ran a finger over them, desperately hoping that the kiss would not become a scar for everyone to see. Her insides felt like jelly at the mere thought of him. The sensations he'd awakened in her were completely new and if she was being honest, a little frightening. She licked her lips anxiously and the unfamiliar taste of Deidara filled her mouth again. She sighed. It was impossible to forget what had happened. What the hell had possessed her to do something like that?!

There was no denying now that her feelings for him were definitely _not_ platonic. She blushed at the memory of his warm hands touching her waist. She shivered at the idea of them touching her bare skin. She had liked kissing Deidara. Hell, she'd loved it! Just thinking about seeing him again brought goosebumps to her flesh.

But no. She was being stupid. Of course it wouldn't happen again. It could never happen again! If even a whisper of this got back to Konoha, then being in serious trouble would definitely win the understatement of the year. She flinched at the mere possibility of fleeing her village. Unfortunately, what Sakura was planning to do was far more incriminating than an accidental – she refused to call it anything other than accidental – kiss with a member of the Akatsuki.

She was going to help Deidara escape. She was aware of how insane it sounded but she could no longer walk away, not when she was so emotionally involved. She was aware of the consequences such a course of action could bring but she honestly believed she had no choice. She couldn't let Deidara die!

She ran her fingers through her cherry blossom hair distractedly. She had four days at best to figure out how to save him – no scrap that – three days. On the fourth day time would run out and then it would be too late for Sakura to help him. To attempt to do so would be nothing short of suicide.

She sighed. The only problem was she didn't have the slightest idea how to get a highly guarded S-class criminal out of a shinobi village on red alert without them knowing she had a hand in it.

_Oh boy_. She put her head in her hands, feeling an oncoming headache. She was so screwed.

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**Comments are love.**


	7. Just Friends?

**A/N:** I am so sorry about the wait! This chapter was really difficult for me to write. Writer's block is a nightmare! Anyway, just about managed to get it out before the New Year! Enjoy! :)

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto

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**Chapter 7: Just Friends?**

It was well past ten o'clock when Sakura finally dragged herself out from between the fluffy white hotel sheets which had inexplicably bunched around her small form sometime during the night. Slipping into the creamy, soft slippers that lay by her bed, the pink-haired kunoichi padded into the bathroom and stifled a yawn. She barely glanced at her tired reflection before she twisted the hot water tap as far as it could go and watched the torrent of steamy water flood the basin.

Thoughts of Deidara, of what she must do had constantly plagued her from the moment she had reached the safety of her hotel room last night. Ideas, thoughts and fears she couldn't control had roamed her brain – thoughts that spiralled endlessly, the same facts and notions repeating themselves over and over until Sakura had feared she might go mad. It was after several cycles of this that she'd finally admitted defeat. It had taken her several hours in which she'd reduced her fingernails to ragged tatters, consumed an unhealthy amount of caffeine and shattered several cups to reach that conclusion but she had reached it nonetheless.

So that she might survive the night – at least somewhat sane – Sakura had opted for the comfort of her sheets, ignoring the fact that it couldn't have been past eight at night. After all she'd figured a few extra hours of sweet, uninterrupted sleep could do her no harm, right?

Wrong.

The clamour of voices inside her head had not ceased to exist the moment her head had hit the pillow. If anything, they'd increased in volume.

_This is hopeless! I'll never be able to pull this off!_

_But I must think of something! There's only two days left for me to figure it out!_

Sakura had lost count of the times she'd analysed the situation. She must have looked at it from every perspective but still she had no answers! To make it worse, in between concocting plans to break Deidara out, thoughts of how she'd acted that day popped up sporadically, making her groan with embarrassment one minute and grin like a fool the next.

_I can't believe I kissed him like that! Argh! He must have thought I was so stupid!_

She'd lost count of the times she'd buried her head in her pillow in shame. Perhaps that would explain why it now sagged unattractively in the middle. Needless to say, Sakura's intention of sleeping early was utterly ruined. And it showed.

The pink-haired kunoichi stared into the pool of hot water for several more moments, watching the insubstantial tendrils of fog reach up to great her. She washed her face carefully as if to erase all the tiredness, enjoying the sensation the hot water created as it soaked her skin. Maybe she wasn't cut out for this after all she wondered despondently.

It was a desperate, depressing topic for sure but Sakura had finished with torturing her brain for today. If worst came to worst she could just punch the wall down she reasoned. She tried not to think about it too much.

With a sigh Sakura headed out the door and decided to do a little reconnaissance before the healing session later. The healing session. Her gut clenched painfully. She had no idea what to expect after her appalling and totally inappropriate behaviour yesterday. She hated to think what he must think of her. But then he'd kissed her back, right? That must be a good sign? But even if it was, was that an entirely good thing? She sighed. Realistically a relationship between them would be impossible!

The Konoha medic groaned inwardly at her one-track mindedness. These were not new thoughts and quite frankly she was sick of them already. The only way to know for certain what he thought was to ask him today. She cringed. That would certainly make for an awkward conversation. Perhaps the best thing was to act like nothing had happened. She sighed. She wouldn't know. The closest she'd ever had to a relationship was what she'd had with Sasuke – if that could be called anything other than mooning around after a boy that had never even noticed her.

Her lips quirked up in amusement. Whatever she felt then was nothing to the way she felt now. Sasuke had been nothing more than a stupid girlish infatuation. She was just surprised it had taken this long to realise it.

All too soon Sakura found herself standing outside the white double doors that led to the infirmary. She hesitated, unsure whether to feel relieved or alarmed that time had flown so fast. She swallowed; fighting down the well of anxiety that had formed in the pit of her stomach and in one swift movement entered the building.

Today there was only a solitary guard at the door who gave her a friendly nod as she approached it. She barely even registered him, barely registered the odd look he gave her as she breezed past him, hand already reaching for the cool metal handle. For a fraction of a second her fingers wavered.

_Moment of truth_.

She gripped the handle tightly and yanked it sharply: the door swung open.

Sakura wasn't sure what she'd been expecting. A tangible sign of what had occurred the day before perhaps? Whatever it was, she'd expected something. What greeted her jade eyes was the same scene, the same room that she'd been subjected to for the past week or so. No evidence remained of the day before yet Sakura still felt a blush spread across her cheeks at the thought.

"Hello Sakura".

The deep, velvety tone caught her off guard. Had his voice always been so undeniably sexy?

"Hi" She managed, forcing her lips something that resembled a smile.

_Just act professional_, she told herself mentally as she reached for the clipboard that was a few scant inches from the bed and relaxed her features into what she hoped was a neutral expression. Without further ado, she began to examine Deidara's injuries, throwing only a cursory glance every now and then in his direction. Her hand sped across the page at inhuman speed as she filled in the sheet, her handwriting considerably messier than usual.

Why she found it so difficult to be in the same room as him, she hadn't even the faintest idea. Perhaps it was fear of his reaction, fear of discovery, or – God help her – fear of the direction their relationship could take.

"Sakura" The sound of his voice cut through her musings. "Is there any reason why you won't even look at me?" He sounded amused.

Damn. He'd noticed.

"I don't mean to be rude" She apologised. "I just need some time to think things through, to get things straight in my mind".

"And these things happen to include me?" Deidara smirked.

"Yes they do". Sakura replied evenly.

Deidara's smirk widened.

She sighed at his typical male ego. A retort was halfway to her lips when she suddenly realised something.

"Have you seen my headband?" She asked distractedly, running her fingers through her loose, rosy locks. Her eyes scanned the combination of sand and dirt which carpeted the floor, hunting for any sign of navy among the dust and grime.

"Hm, what?" Deidara replied absent-mindedly, not really paying attention. "No I can't say I have, yeah".

Sakura sighed half-exasperatedly and began to search frantically for the elusive headband in the corners, through the cabinet, on the tray. Her final check was under the bed. If Sakura had known, she probably wouldn't have worn her dark skirt today as the material slid up several inches as she did so, revealing a fair amount of thigh but Deidara wasn't about to complain. His view was _much_ better than hers!

"Perfect" Sakura groaned, as she emerged from under the bed a few moments later and proceeded to dust off the copious amounts of sand that clung to her clothes like glue. "Just perfect. There's no sign of it anywhere!"

"Maybe you should check again, yeah?" Deidara barely hid his smirk. Fortunately for him, it went unnoticed by the irate kunoichi.

"I think I would have noticed it the first time" Sakura replied, annoyance seeping through her tone, unsure whether his suggestion was friendly advice or a gibe at her skills as a shinobi. Her jade eyes scrutinized their surroundings closely, searching for something she might have missed but to no avail.

"Can you think of anywhere else it might be?" She asked him seriously.

"Maybe it went for a walk?" Deidara replied nonchalantly but secretly he enjoyed watching Sakura become more flustered by the minute.

She turned to face him incredulously, a look of exasperation on her face. "Could you at least pretend to help?" She snapped.

A sharp rap on the door made both of them jump. Sakura leapt backwards in surprise. She hadn't realised how close the two of them had been standing. Moments later a sand shinobi – whom Sakura recognised from previous guard duties – entered the room.

"Miss Haruno, you-" The shinobi began, holding out his right hand which was clenched tightly around a headband – _her headband_, she realised in horror.

Fear flashed through her green eyes before it was quickly extinguished. She didn't know what she would do if everything she'd done, everything she was planning to do was discovered! Yet, how would she manage to pull it off without people finding out anyway?

"It's not what you think" She interrupted. Her mind worked frantically; she had absolutely no idea how to explain everything away. She prayed for a burst of inspiration. "I-"

"Its ok" He sent her an easy smile as he handed the headband to the very bewildered kunoichi. "You mustn't have tied it on properly".

"Yeah, thanks" She said, a little stunned and more than a little relieved.

It wasn't until he closed the door that Sakura released the air she'd been unconsciously holding. Her face was flushed and her heart was beating out a violent tattoo against her ribs. That had been close!

Deidara raised an eyebrow at her.

"Shut up".

They said nothing for a few minutes. Sakura attempted to push the matter aside and focused on healing him. A process that was made very difficult by the chaotic whirlwind of thoughts that flew around her head. Despite what they had both agreed on the previous day, Sakura found it hard to not think of Deidara romantically. She found it hard not to wonder what it would be like to trail her finger tips across his naked chest in other circumstances. She found herself reliving the kiss and aching for more but at the same time she was afraid. Not just because she was inexperienced. The reality of the situation had sunk in once again in the aftermath of the incident with the guard.

If things continued, then she could be placing both their lives in even more danger. There was a reason ninjas were supposed to keep their emotions under control. Emotions could cloud their judgement. Clouded judgement could lead to mistakes and unnecessary risks. An entire mission could be jeopardised by uncontrolled emotions. And unfortunately Sakura had never been good at separating the two.

* * *

There was little to be heard in the forest apart from the twittering of a few birds, the gurgle of a stream as it wound its way slowly through the ground and the faint patter of shoes and clatter of claws each time they came into contact with the next branch. The sun was high in the sky, yet the forest was so dense that only a few rays penetrated through the roof of leaves, creating a dappled effect on the forest floor.

Even so, Kakashi preferred the dimly lit forest to the endless expanse of sand that had taken the ninjas two days to traverse. For one thing, there was no sand to contend with, and he was grateful for the barrier of leaves overhead that protected him from the merciless sun.

Ahead, he could discern the sandy-coloured tail of Bisuke bobbing up and down as he leapt from one branch to the next. Although similar in size to Pakkun – who was still on the mission to deliver a message to Tsunade – Bisuke was incredibly annoying for such a small dog. He had nearly emptied Kakashi's stock of dog biscuits and needed several belly-rubs a day to keep him happy. Kakashi sighed wearily. Next time, he would make sure not to choose the little biscuit-devouring monster.

Suddenly there was a clattering of claws as Bisuke came skidding to a halt. In a heartbeat, Kakashi caught up to him and it was apparent that the ninken was having difficulty relocating the trail. This was bad news. There had been several points in which he had been sure they'd lost the trail, only to have found it once again after several delays. The fact that they'd found the trail in the first place was nothing short of a miracle. However the Akatsuki member had seemed to realise early on that he was being followed as not long after they had discovered the trail it had split into four. With no other options, the group had split into four, each team consisting of one shinobi and one ninja dog. And since then luck had been conspiring against them.

Kakashi sighed. At this rate they were never going to catch up with the elusive Akatsuki member.

The grass barely rustled as Bisuke nimbly dropped to the ground and Kakashi was close to follow. The little dog sniffed at the ground intently before going round in circles, straining to catch even the faintest whiff of their quarry.

"I'm sorry, Kakashi". The sandy dog looked up at the copy-cat ninja with doleful eyes. "The trail ends here".

"We'd better call the others" Kakashi sighed.

It wasn't long before the other teams were assembled in the little clearing and after a thorough search it was confirmed by the other dogs that the trail Kakashi and Bisuke were following did indeed end there. Even worse news was that all the other trails had inexplicably vanished too. Disappointment was clear on everyone's faces. They hadn't come so far just to lose the trail now!

Naruto sat despondently on the grass while Ten Ten and Neji shared equally disappointed looks. Only Gai and Lee remained positive. It seemed nothing could dampen their spirits.

"Alright" Kakashi called them all together. "There's still a chance that we've missed something. We're going to search the area just in case. Everyone spread out from here. Meet back within two hours, if there's still no sign of the trail then we'll head back to the Sand".

Gai and Lee jumped up enthusiastically; each determined to find the trail first. They grabbed two surprised dogs and ran off before the others had so much as moved.

Soon only Kakashi and Bisuke were left in the clearing. The copy-cat ninja gave a sigh and rubbed his headband unconsciously. Although he'd never admit it, sometimes he wished he had some of Gai's enthusiasm. All the signs had pointed to the fact that their target knew he was being followed all along. How long had they been following a false trail? Kakashi couldn't believe they had fallen for such a cheap trick. Their target was long gone.

* * *

Deidara wondered if he was going mad. He wasn't sure how much longer he could resist the cool, smooth hands that slid tantalisingly across his torso, down his arms and even once – fleetingly – across his face. The amount of control that he had to exercise over his own body was becoming painful. He clenched his jaw; half-wanting to push the pink-haired medic away and half-wishing she'd never stop.

At first, Deidara had believed that she didn't have feelings for him, that the kiss they'd shared had been a product of heated emotions. After all it had been she who had suggested that they pretend it never happened. Deidara had been ready to let the whole thing slide, to never entertain the idea of being with her again. However, within a few minutes of Sakura arriving at the medical centre it had been clear that she _did_ still like him and his hopes rose once more.

Perhaps she thought she was cleverly concealing her emotions behind a neutral smile, only a quick glance at him every so often but her body betrayed her. The inability to conceal her emotions – it was her greatest weakness and Deidara knew that if she had been brought up in any other village than Konoha it would have been stamped out of her at a young age. But he was glad it hadn't. Sakura was full of life and compassion and she drew him to her, like a candle to a flame.

She liked him, but she didn't want to be with him. He couldn't blame her. For him, an Akatsuki member imprisoned in an enemy village, facing the death sentence the choice couldn't have been clearer. But Sakura, she had so much more to lose.

With a sigh, Deidara heaved himself upright and swung his feet over the edge of the bed causing Sakura to withdraw in confusion. Without the soothing flow of chakra, his wounds began to throb.

"I'm not done yet" Sakura protested, summoning her chakra again and reaching for his torso.

Her fingers halted unexpectedly a few inches from his skin as Deidara wrapped his fingers around hers.

"Leave it" He said, while Sakura could only stare. He let go of her fingers and they dropped to her side, already forgotten.

"Why?"

"I can't-". For once he seemed to be struggling with his words. Was it anger or uncertainty that held him back?

"Can't what?" Sakura asked impatiently, completely nonplussed.

Deidara just shook his head, unable to explain. How could he explain?

It was only the creaking of the bed and the sudden warmth on his right that alerted him to her presence beside him. For a long while they sat like that, neither speaking, just taking comfort in human contact. Sakura waited. She knew he wasn't going to say anything until he was ready.

Deidara couldn't take it anymore. He knew it would not be long now before the Sand gave up trying to question him. Even if they didn't give up, soon his body would start rejecting the healing process. His body could not cope with that level of abuse indefinitely.

Perhaps ten days had elapsed since his fight with the kazekage, maybe more. That fight seemed a lifetime ago. Everything had changed since he'd met Sakura. She had awakened a part of himself he never thought he had and he found himself wanting things he had never wanted before.

It was all because of her and for that reason Deidara could not pretend that what they'd shared had never happened. To be so close to her was torture. He couldn't stand to think what might have been if circumstances were different.

"I can't pretend anymore, yeah".

Sakura could only stare. Of all the things she'd expected, this was not one of them. She wanted to tell him that it had been a mistake, that she didn't feel that way but the words had become lodged in her throat and she was rendered mute by his words. She could feel herself getting hotter and hotter as he waited for her reaction, at a complete loss for words.

This was not how it was supposed to happen! Sakura had not envisioned the healing session to turn out like this. Only by distancing herself from him, could she have any hope of rescuing him. That was what she'd thought. Now she was not so sure. Because in the end, would it really matter?

"For God's sake Sakura, don't keep me in suspense!" Deidara groaned. She jerked out of her reverie, suddenly realising that he was still waiting for a reply but she had none to give him.

She wondered how long she could keep this up, really. How long could _she_ pretend? Were the waves of heat rolling off her skin palpable to him from just a few inches away? Was it obvious how much she wanted him, just from the way she shifted to and fro on the bed? The back of his hand barely touched hers and she barely suppressed a shiver as a rush of desire ran through her like wildfire. Every nerve in her body was attenuated to him.

Something must have shown on her face because the next moment he was kissing her. And then it didn't matter that she hadn't found the words to explain, didn't matter that she was a Konoha medic and he a member of the Akatsuki or that she was planning on helping him escape the Sand in little over a day. All that mattered was the feel of his lips as they moulded against hers. His taste was addictive. This was what she'd wanted all day, she realised.

She teased his lower lip mischievously and leant into him, enjoying their closeness. His hands wove their way through her soft, silky hair as she slid onto his lap and deepened the kiss. He gave a moan and pressed her against him, his tongue hungrily exploring her mouth as she allowed him entrance. Her core tightened pleasurably and she moaned, driven by the need for him to sate the powerful ache inside her.

She could feel his erection through his clothing; sense how eager he was to take things further but his actions felt almost constrained. He was holding back.

A sudden noise outside abruptly ended their intimacy and they broke apart. Sakura sighed and Deidara looked equally put out. She gave him an apologetic look and began to tidy away the medical equipment. Both knew that it would be unwise for her to stay much longer so Deidara made no move to stop her.

"I'll be back later" She promised as she ran her fingers through her mussed up hair in an attempt to return it to normal. "There's something I need to tell you".

Without waiting for a reply, she left the room leaving him mystified.


	8. The Calm before the Storm

**A/N:** Finally, I have reached the point in the story I have been dying to write ever since I've first started it! Read and enjoy! :)

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto

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**Chapter 8: The Calm before the Storm**

Deidara awoke with a jolt, his senses tingling. It was dark outside. He strained his eyes against the inky blackness and after a few seconds the smothering sensation lifted as his eyes began to adjust. Now fully awake, he could discern the pale light that shone through the barred window, leaving long silvery strips of light upon the dusty floor. Everything appeared to be normal but that didn't mean it was so.

He strained his ears, listening for even the slightest sound. He had awoken on instinct, of that he was positive. Men like him did not suddenly awaken in the middle of the night for no apparent reason. He had never bothered to count the many times had he jerked awake to sense the faint chakra signatures of enemy ninja approaching, signalling his cue to leave. And speaking of chakra signatures, there was one just outside his window.

Deidara's whole body tensed, his mind racing, but then–

"Deidara, are you awake?" A familiar voice hissed through the bars.

He let out an audible sigh of relief. "Sakura, what are you doing here?"

"I said I'd come back later, didn't I?" Sakura replied archly.

Deidara wondered how she could be so blasé about sneaking out to see him in the middle of the night. She would have a job of explaining herself if anyone ever found out. He was about to say so when Sakura interrupted his train of thought.

"So, aren't you going to ask me what was so incredibly important to talk about that I risked my neck to come and see you?" The pink-haired medic began again, slightly annoyed at his lack of response.

"I was getting to that" Deidara answered slowly, wondering what on earth the topic could be for Sakura's face had turned unusually serious. Inching closer to the bars, he could see the faint lines of worry that spanned across her face. "Sakura, what's bothering you, yeah?"

It was certainly unlike Sakura to risk everything on a secret meeting. From what he'd seen she was actually pretty logical and rational, except when her temper got the better of her. He just couldn't understand why she'd do it, unless…

"It's-" She began uncertainly, unsure of how to phrase her plans and the conversation she had had with the Kazekage a few nights back. The week was almost up! Just when she thought her courage might fail her, she suddenly she found her voice. "The Kazekage thinks that-"

"You spoke with the Kazekage?" Deidara asked, his eyes flashing at the mention of the name.

"Yes" Sakura frowned slightly and continued. "He said that you're of little use to Sunagakure. The information they have received is practically useless and unless I'm much mistaken the Sand won't keep you prisoner here much longer. Gaara even said that if they hadn't obtained any new information by the end of the week then they are going to stop the interrogation".

She stopped, expecting a shocked, worried response but none was forthcoming. Wondering if he had not quite understood she continued.

"They're going to kill you!"

She watched carefully for a reaction; a nervous twitch, a faint flicker of surprise but there was none.

"Deidara!"

"I know" he said heavily. Sakura looked rather taken aback.

"W- what?" She choked out, her green eyes filled with astonishment.

He hated to repeat himself.

"I know, yeah".

Then it clicked. There was a faint "oh!" from the pink-haired kunoichi before she sank to her knees; her expression a mixture of sorrow and something he couldn't quite place.

The brightness of the moon from behind strengthened her silhouette; illuminating the whole street but her face was cast in shadows. Her normally pink hair had now taken on an odd silvery sheen in the pallid light. Deidara thought he saw something glimmer between the strangely coloured strands before it was gone.

Sakura raised her head once more, a strange mixture of defiance and determination shining in the depths of her jade eyes. Slowly she got to her feet.

"Surely you knew this would happen, yeah?" Deidara asked Sakura disbelievingly. "You had to have known it would end like this. I'll be dead and gone before the weeks out and there's nothing anyone can do about it, yeah".

His voice was casual and uncaring but his fingers shook. The panic that had been growing inside him like a vicious clawed monster reached almost boiling point but he forced it back down again as he had on many other occasions. His pathetic attempt at bravado was enough to make him sick but he didn't care as long as she bought it. No one could ever see him like this, not even Sakura.

"You're wrong". Her voice was quiet but Deidara heard it perfectly. So perfectly he had difficulty convincing himself he'd misheard her. "I'm going to help you escape".

Her voice had a steely edge to it he'd never heard before and he knew in that instant that she was deadly serious. The mere idea was so utterly ludicrous that for one wild moment Deidara felt the urge to laugh but it was quashed almost immediately by the sickening reality of the situation. If she followed it through then they were both dead. She had to know that. So why would she go to such lengths just to save him? It was beyond insane!

"Don't be stupid! We wouldn't even make it half-way across the village!" He growled.

"Well, if you think I'm just going to stand by and watch when they-" Sakura began angrily but Deidara refused to let her finish.

"Look, even if we do make it through the village, what then? Konoha will never accept you back and you'll become a missing nin. Is that the sort of life you want? No one would ever choose such a life, Sakura!" Deidara whispered furiously through the bars.

"What else would you have me do?" Sakura hissed back in equally hushed tones. "And don't tell me to just forget about what is happening here because believe me, I can't! I've gone over every single strategy in my head thousands of times yet I still can't seem to come up with a reasonable escape plan and time is running out!"

"And betraying your village doesn't bother you?" Deidara asked sceptically. "Are you really determined to sacrifice everything for a man who is as good as dead anyway?"

"Don't say that" Sakura muttered. Then in a louder voice she said "Look, if I'm being perfectly honest, I don't know. Of course I don't want to give up my friends, my home, my _life_ – but I can't watch you die, I have to do something!"

Deidara simply looked at her. His cerulean eyes traced her features, taking in even the tiniest of expressions. The way her teeth pulled on her lower lip worriedly, the quavering expression in her jade eyes, the scarcely perceptible tremor of her hands, the slight creasing of her forehead – nothing escaped his notice. He wanted nothing more than to pretend that there was even the slightest chance the plan could work but he knew better than to place all his hopes on an impossibility. It pained him to admit it but he'd refuse her help a thousand times over if it meant bring her down with him.

He grasped her hand tightly and looked at her straight in the eye. "Promise me, you won't try to save me" he asked seriously as his heart lurched. "Please".

She opened her mouth and then closed it again. His eyes gave her no room for manoeuvre; they held her tightly in place and she suddenly found she couldn't refuse. "A-alright" she agreed reluctantly, tightening her hold on his hand.

Deidara breathed a sigh of relief, doing his best to ignore the strange sensation in his chest. If Sakura had agreed, then there was no need to worry, right?

He pulled her other arm through the bars and gave her an awkward hug. They stayed like that in each others arms for a few moments, each taking comfort in the warmth of the other's skin. Slowly, Sakura pulled back with a sigh. It was getting late.

She muttered her apologies and then gave him a swift peck on the lips before departing as swiftly as she came. Like Deidara, she too was dreading the dawn.

* * *

When Sakura awoke early the next day, it took her a moment to realise what the leaden sensation in her stomach was and then she remembered. Today was the last healing session before his execution tomorrow morning. Suddenly, Sakura couldn't stay in bed a moment longer.

The pink-haired kunoichi rushed through all her morning routines, if only to have something to do, anything to distract herself from Deidara's fate which loomed over her head like a black, thunderous storm cloud. Sometime in the night she had subconsciously decided that promise or no promise, she _would_ help Deidara.

She mulled it over at breakfast – forming wild arguments in her head as she struggled to come up with the words to tell him that she refused to let him go. She was so engrossed in the task that she barely noticed what she was eating.

And then it was time to go. Butterflies fluttered in her stomach as she approached the medical centre and Sakura found herself wishing she'd skipped breakfast as a wave of nausea swept over her. The familiar white building appeared ominous and formidable; a growing feeling of unease settled in her stomach as she traversed the corridors, following the familiar route to Deidara's cell.

She rounded the corner and the grey iron-clad door and motionless outline of the sentry came into view. Upon noticing her, the guard momentarily abandoned his post with the clear intention of intercepting her. Not once in over a week had a guard bothered to meet Sakura half-way down the corridor so it was with great trepidation that she watched him approach.

"Haruno, Sakura" The guard began. "Did you not get the message?"

Sakura's brow furrowed in confusion as the anxiety in the pit of her stomach fluctuated warningly.

"Message?" She echoed blankly.

"Were you not told that the interrogation period is over?" He asked questioningly. "He is no longer needed for questioning so there's no point in healing him any longer". Her mouth went dry. "Good thing too, I'm just about getting sick of staring at a blank wall all day. I'm sure you're relieved it's over?"

"Oh yes!" Sakura croaked out and she nodded her head. "Yes, I am".

Dismayed she was about to turn back down the corridor when a thought struck her. Perhaps there was a way to see him, if only for a moment.

"Oh, I forgot! I'll need to collect my medical things from the room then!" This was not strictly true as her medical equipment was in fact inside the canvas bag slung over her shoulder but the guard wasn't to know that. She barely waited for his response – a barely perceptible nod of approval – before she strode past him and through the iron clad door.

"Sakura!" Deidara's exclamation of surprise made the kunoichi break out into a grin. "They said you weren't coming back!" She laughed at the look of utter amazement on his face and the stopped when she took in his wounds.

It was like the first night all over again. His skin was mottled purple from extensive bruising, one shoulder was dislocated and his left arm hung at a very odd angle. It was broken. On closer inspection Sakura noticed multiple lacerations that spanned across his back and it was these that she attended to first – he had already lost a lot of blood.

It was almost second nature to dip into the endless swirl of chakra and summon it into her hands but before she'd even begun to draw upon her own power Deidara stopped her – a look of warning upon his face. He jerked his head towards the door, reminding her that any chakra she summoned would be detected by the guard outside and since she was no longer commanded to heal him, doing so would certainly raise a few eyebrows and a lot of questions.

A spasm of pain fleetingly crossed her face as she grudgingly withdrew her hand. She had never felt so powerless to help in her life. She had the power to heal him and yet she could not do so, not without risking everything.

She grabbed a roll of bandages instead from the medical tray, a look of fierce determination on her face. She began to wrap them deftly around his muscular frame, working at a speed that was unheard of, acutely aware of the guard stationed outside and wondering how much time she had left.

"What are y-" Deidara began and then took a sharp intake of breath as Sakura chose that moment to pop his shoulder back into place. Acting like nothing had happened; she then proceeded to wrap his other arm in a sling. A few moments later and Sakura stepped back to admire her handiwork, breathing heavily. It was a bit rough she decided, but it would have to do.

"Sakura, why are you doing all this, yeah?" Deidara asked in disbelief. "You shouldn't have come back here. It's not safe."

"I couldn't just leave" Sakura replied, conveying more than those four words in her jade eyes.

"You promised" Deidara reminded her warningly. Sakura sighed.

"I know but-"

A loud knock on the door caused Sakura to jump a mile. Her heart knocked uncomfortably against her ribs as she eyed the door intently, expecting the sand shinobi to come bursting in there at any second.

"You alright in there?" The guard hollered through the metal, his voice strangely muffled.

"I've got to go" Sakura muttered, terrified. She gave him a quick kiss on the lips, conveying everything she felt into that one small act in those few seconds. She inhaled his scent – a woody, masculine scent – then took a deep breath and began to walk away.

"Sakura" She was almost at the door. "Promise you won't come back."

His body might have been bleeding and broken in places, but his eyes shone with the same determination and defiance Sakura had seen on the first night. She stared at him for a second before she shivered and turned away. She did not want to break her promise to him twice. She shut the door behind her with a loud bang, thanked the guard for allowing her to retrieve her things, gave him the nearest thing to a smile she could muster and practically ran out the doors, into the bright sunlight. It was only then, leaning next to a sandy wall that she allowed herself even the smallest of sobs.

* * *

The rest of the day was the possibly the worst Sakura had ever experienced. She spent the majority of it wandering aimlessly about the village – the knot of anxiety in her stomach now so tightly wound she wondered if it would stay that way permanently. This was worse than any exam, worse than any of the missions she'd been on! The only other time she had felt this helpless was when Sasuke had left.

Sasuke. She paused in the centre of the empty street, frowning hard. The days of Team 7 seemed almost like a dream now, a dream of a happier time and a better place. Nothing could ever go back to exactly the way it was, yet Sakura still hoped it would, if only for Naruto's sake. She wondered how Sasuke would look now – he would be taller and his face would not be so childlike perhaps. She sighed. She hadn't seen him in over two years. Who knew what he'd be like now.

She chastised herself for going off on a tangent at such a time and forced herself to think of strategies and tactics; anything that could help for tonight.

She rounded the corner and suddenly found herself in the middle of the market place. She weaved in amongst the stalls, automatically finding gaps in the press of bodies that crowded around them as her mind wandered elsewhere. The cacophony of voices – of traders and buyers, mothers and children, friends and old acquaintances was nothing more than a distant buzzing in Sakura's ears. She swept pass the stalls without a passing glance; it was only by detecting the distinct smells of certain foods that she was even vaguely aware of what they were selling.

She supposed she should have been glad of the extra time the cancelled healing session gave her to scout out the parts of the village she wasn't familiar with but she'd have much rather spent it with Deidara than dwelling on all the things that could go wrong. Scouting out the area was a waste of time in any case. The Konoha medic could barely focus. She stared unseeing at the passersby, completely oblivious to the shoppers that jostled her as they made their way through the market. A blind panic was settling in now – numbing her brain and making it impossible to think.

She couldn't breathe! She had to get out of there!

She pushed people aside, ignoring the cries of "Watch it!" and "What the hell do you think you're doing?" and eventually reached the edge of the crowd away from the hustle and bustle of the market.

She leant against a sandy wall which crumbled slightly at her touch and took a few deep, shuddering breaths of clean, unpolluted air. She was going to have to get a better grip on things if she wanted to achieve anything tonight.

Several hours later, Sakura retreated to her room and began to pack her bag full of all the necessary things she needed for the unofficial mission she'd set herself. She then proceeded to change into her spare outfit – she quite liked it but never had had much occasion to wear it before. It was black and tight fitting which made it perfect for a covert operation such as this. She wore a long black round-necked, short-sleeved top which clung snugly to her figure – the Haruno crest on the back clearly visible, a black skirt and her usual boots.

For a long moment, she stared at her reflection in the mirror. It was funny how her reflection looked a lot more confident than she felt, Sakura thought moodily. Perhaps it was a sign things would go well?

She imagined smashing the white-washed wall of the medical centre – bricks and debris flying everywhere; Deidara's stunned expression; both of them escaping the walls of Sunagakure, undetected and unharmed. Of course she would have to double back so as not to arouse suspicion and Deidara's wounds would be a problem but aside from those gaping flaws in her plans…

She breathed in deeply.

"Okay, I can do this" she told herself mentally, ignoring the little voice in the back of her head that told her she was being incredibly rash and foolish.

She glanced once more at her reflection, tucking a lone strand of hair behind her ear and she did so and then sighed. It was time to go.

The cool night air gave her mind an odd sense of clarity as she set off silently across the rooftops, wary of any guards she might have missed. The night was a deep velvety blue, dotted with stars that twinkled brightly like encrusted diamonds. Everything was still; Sakura was constantly on alert for the sound of crunching boots, the swish of a cloak, a hint of chakra but to her utter bewilderment she sensed nothing. Perhaps she'd planned her route better than she thought.

She began to wonder if Deidara would be angry that she went back on her promise. She sighed. That was a categorical "yes" if there ever was one. Still, knowing that she'd take back her promise a thousand times rather than witness the alternative was encouraging.

The distinctly white building was now in view and Sakura's heart quickened at the thought of what she was about to do. There could be no mistakes, no more planning. And no turning back.

* * *

Deidara rolled uncomfortably onto his side for what felt like the hundredth time that evening. It was almost impossible for him to get to sleep and it didn't take a genius to figure out why.

It was as though his whole body was rebelling against the fact that his death would take place in less than ten hours. What was the point in sleeping when it only served to hasten the inevitable? His heart beat furiously as though it knew its heartbeats were numbered and faint tremors racked his body every time he lost control. His wounds throbbed at intervals but he paid them no heed. They were of little consequence after all.

How much longer would he have to endure this? The wait was almost unbearable. He half wished they'd come early and get it over and done with. Deidara was never afraid of death in the heat of battle – it often gave him an odd thrill to know that he was within inches of dying – but this was different. Once he had the time to stop and think about it, staring death in the face like this was an entirely different matter.

A faint noise outside the window jerked him out of his train of thought. Sakura! He couldn't believe she'd come back for him even after he'd made her promise! He slid off the bed noiselessly and sneaked towards the barred window.

"Sakura, what are you doing?" He hissed angrily through the bars. "I thought I told you not to come back, yeah!"

He expected an angry retort from the pink-haired kunoichi about how she was risking life and limb to come here and didn't even receive as much as a thanks, but none was forthcoming. Deidara squinted through the piercingly bright moonlight, just able to distinguish a dark outline against the night sky. She appeared to be huddled on the ground.

"Sakura?" Deidara asked worriedly.

"Who's Sakura?" A deep voice asked indifferently from somewhere in the middle of the huddle. Deidara's blue eyes widened with shock. He knew that voice. He could recognise those deep, guttural tones anywhere.

"Sasori?" Deidara didn't trouble to keep the astonishment out of his voice. "What are you _doing_ here?"

* * *

**A/N:** Sorry, couldn't resist leaving it on such an evil cliffhanger! The next chapter is going to be so fun to write! Oh and did I mention that the first character death takes place in it?


	9. We All Break The Same

**A/N:** Thanks a million to **xMidnight-Spiritx**, **Meira Evenstar**, **Cold Fyre**, **Sea-Glass88**, **GRAY SKIES AHEAD**, **Keiri Bradon** and **Angel's Wiings** for reviewing - I really appreciate you taking the time to review. I absolutely love feedback and it inspires me further in writing this story.

Also I am planning on _**writing another Naruto story**_ sometime in the near future. Please take the time to do the poll on my profile so I know what pairing my readers would like to see the most before I start planning it. I promise to write a story about the one that wins, even if it's not the one I have the most ideas for. So please take the time to vote.

Sorry for making you wait so long for this chapter. I meant to get this out earlier but university work among other things limited the amount of free time I had. But it's here now, so have at it!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto

* * *

**Chapter 9: We All Break The Same**

* * *

"What are you doing here, yeah?" Deidara repeated angrily once he'd recovered from his initial shock at seeing his old partner. He stared with dislike at the puppet master's impassive face, or rather the face of the puppet, Hiruko which he was encased inside of.

"You kept me waiting Deidara" Sasori growled with a familiar bite of impatience in his voice. Joints creaking ominously he ambled closer to the wall, as a great scorpion's tail emerged from Hiruko's back, poised like a cobra ready to strike. Almost lazily the tail flicked across the white-washed wall. A thin groove appeared on the otherwise nondescript wall. Deidara barely had time to register the second flick of the tail before the wall came crashing down. He stumbled backwards, choking on the brick and dirt that clogged the air.

Sasori entered the room unfazed. A small thing like dust wasn't going to affect him; he was almost entirely a puppet after all. There was barely any human left in him! Deidara privately thought there had never been any to begin with. Anyone would have to be truly insane to commit that kind of atrocity to their body. Life was supposed to be fleeting, transient like art but then neither of them had ever seen eye-to-eye when it came to that particular topic.

It wasn't long before the chakra bands clattered to the floor and Deidara was finally free. He rubbed his wrists instinctively where the bands had chafed against his skin, a smile just visible upon his lips.

"We're leaving now" Sasori said impatiently, jerking Deidara out of his thoughts. With that came the realisation that someone must have heard the break-in by now and it would only be a matter of minutes before the place was swarming with Suna nin. They would be pursued sooner or later and Deidara didn't fancy his chances unarmed, without his clay.

"I'm not leaving without my stuff, yeah" He said obstinately. He thrust his hand through the door and broke the lock easily. He smirked at the ease of it.

"Don't take too long Deidara. You know I hate to wait" Sasori warned as he began to sneak up the corridor, noting the absence of the usual guard. From the looks of things Sasori hadn't disposed of him so Deidara could only assume he'd run off to get help.

_Coward_, he sneered, disappointed that the shinobi hadn't stuck around. Deidara sensed that killing him would have been immensely gratifying. Plus help would now arrive sooner than expected but Deidara was unconcerned. In fact he relished the idea of cracking a few skulls. The ones that had interrogated him in particular.

Before long he reached the storage unit. This was where Deidara's gear had been stashed, he was certain of it. He had passed it enough times on the way to the interrogation unit to guess what it contained. He broke the lock effortlessly, pleased to see that he was right.

Within moments he'd collected all his gear and strode back down the corridor. Yet something didn't feel right. Deidara couldn't place his finger on it but now he thought about it there was definitely something suspicious about Sasori's arrival.

From the time they'd spent together, Deidara had gleaned certain aspects of Sasori's personality – which was difficult considering he had the emotional range of a pea. He cared about no one and nothing except his precious art. Sasori would probably welcome the untimely demise of his partner for he preferred to operate alone; any company was a nuisance. That coupled with his intense hatred of being made to wait meant that Sasori had almost certainly not chosen to come here of his own free will. He wondered what that meant. It was an unspoken agreement among Akatsuki members that while they might work together, anyone who fell behind was left behind. The weak would not be tolerated.

His mind worked furiously. The only feasible explanation was that they had something big planned. And they needed him for it to work. Deidara could've cared less what underhand scheme they'd cooked up this time involved as long as he had no part in it. Unfortunately it looked like he didn't have a choice.

Deidara sighed. Aside from being held captive, he had quite enjoyed the brief respite from the Akatsuki and everything it included. He would quit in a half beat if given the chance but _no one_ quits Akatsuki. Without the protection of a village he'd be dead within a month, if he was lucky. He wondered vaguely how Orochimaru had done it. On second thought, he decided he'd rather not know.

Sasori was tapping his foot in irritation when Deidara re-entered the room.

"Got everything?" The red-head asked coldly from inside his wooden armour.

"Yeah" Deidara replied, eager to taste the sweet night air for the first time since his capture. They exited through the collapsed wall without a backwards glance.

His first lungful of air felt like the first he'd ever inhaled. He stood still for a few seconds revelling in the cleanness and freshness of the air that passed smoothly through his system. It was incredible how stagnant and stuffy the air in the cell he'd been confined to felt compared to the purity of the outdoors. Rejuvenated, Deidara took his first steps towards true freedom as he followed Sasori down the narrow streets.

His last thoughts were of Sakura. He almost wished that he could abandon his plight and search for her one last time but their paths were sundered. It would be better if she never saw him again. He swallowed the prick of regret that tugged gently at his innards and turned his back on her, facing the horizon and the new dawn.

* * *

"Deidara?" Sakura's quavering voice was barely more than a whisper as she peered around the edge of the gaping hole that dominated the entire wall. Her eyes attempted to pierce the gloom, unable to make out anything outside the circle of light the moon cast upon the small patch that was totally exposed to the elements.

Almost fearfully, she cast out her senses questing for the chakra signature that had she had come to recognise like the palm of her hand. The room was devoid of life, empty like a blank canvas. Still she had to make sure.

She climbed over the wreckage, noticing that what had destroyed the wall had cut cleanly through the iron wires that formed a crisscrossed infrastructure inside the wall. It was apparent the moment she'd entered the room that whoever had been there was long gone and Deidara with them. A discordant noise – a strange cracking sound that was different from the crunch of her boots as they trampled the brick and mortar – alerted her attention to a circular band half-hidden among the dirt. She recognised it immediately. It was one of the chakra wristbands snapped cleanly in two. The ethereal green glow that usually emanated from it had faded, further proving that the band was no longer functional. She brushed the band with her fingertips; it was still warm. Perhaps they weren't far ahead, she pondered with renewed hope. In any case being found at the scene of the crime was something she'd rather avoid.

Before long she was flying across the rooftops, hot on their trail as the voices of Suna shinobi arriving at the scene echoed throughout the village. The east gate was closest. She was sure that was the route they'd pick.

Who were "they" though? It was clear that Deidara had at least one accomplice in the escape. He would not have been able to remove the chakra bands on his own. But if he had friends who could bust him out then why didn't he just alleviate her fears by telling her? Or perhaps he didn't trust her? Or was it all a lie? Sakura didn't know what to think.

A sharp flare of chakra spiked from somewhere ahead and the kunoichi dropped back into the shadows taking extra care to conceal her chakra. Once she was certain she was completely hidden, Sakura peaked at the scene unfolding further down the street. Deidara and a squat figure who wore a black cloak adorned with deep red clouds were facing her way but they appeared to not realise that they had an audience. So his accomplice was a fellow member of the Akatsuki then. Sakura felt a brief prickle of fear for her friends. Weren't they supposed to be tracking this man?

"Like hell I will! There's no way I'm letting you leave!" The third figure shouted. Sakura gave a start. She had been so intent on the man next to Deidara that she'd completely overlooked the sand shinobi with his back to her that faced the two wanted criminals alone.

"Oh and I suppose you're going to stop us, yeah?" Deidara replied sardonically. Sakura froze. Two titanic forces inside her were grappling with each other: one was telling her to flee, to get away from all this before it consumed her; the other was clamouring for her to reveal herself, to unleash her anger and force the truth out of Deidara. All she knew was that she couldn't stay pressed up against the wall, watching events fold out in front of her.

"We don't have time for this, Deidara." A low guttural voice interjected.

An audible sigh reached her hiding place. "Yes I know," Deidara replied in irked tones. They both ignored the shouts of the sand shinobi. "Do you have to remind me constantly? Let's just finish this before more sand shinobi show up".

"You'll pay for what you tried to do to my brother!" The shinobi glared as he began to remove the three heavy scrolls from his back. Sakura let out an inaudible gasp. She had thought that voice had sounded familiar.

"As you wish" Sasori said in answer to what Deidara said chuckling slightly. "I'm sick of waiting in this infernal village. The very sight of it makes me nauseous".

_Please don't fight them_, Sakura thought desperately. _You'll only get killed!_

But unsurprisingly Kankuro never heard her silent pleas. He was not a mind reader and at that moment all of his focus was spent on the two infiltrators before him. A few quick hand seals later and three puppets were summoned to the dusty streets of Suna. For some reason the squat figure found this amusing.

"What's so funny?" Kankuro demanded angrily. There was no reply. "Fine, don't answer then," he glared as he slid into battle position.

Without warning the first puppet launched itself at the duo controlled by the deft movements of Kankuro's fingers. A clash of steel rang out across the village and Sakura gasped. A colossal metal tail –shaped like that of a huge scorpion's – protruded from underneath the stranger's cloak and wrapped in its coils was the hapless puppet swaying uselessly in the light breeze. Kankuro looked as shocked as Sakura felt. The action had been so fast that she'd completely missed it. Clearly this man wasn't playing around.

With a flick of his wrist, Kankuro pulled the puppet apart and instantly reassembled it when it was out of the scorpion tail's clutches. His fingers twitched again; the signal for all three of the puppets to swoop down upon Sasori, launching an all out offensive. Almost lazily it seemed to Sakura, he blocked all of Kankuro's attacks. No matter what combination of attacks Kankuro threw at him, Sasori managed to block every single one without a single scratch. Even his clothes were intact.

It was clear to the pink-haired kunoichi that Kankuro was outmatched in every way possible. It was as though the Akatsuki member could read his thoughts rather than his moves. Sakura knew that she should help him but her legs wouldn't move. A combination of fear and uncertainty had locked them in place. It was all she could do to watch with growing horror.

"How-," whispered Kankuro weakly, quite unable to believe that he was so outmatched by this man.

A resounding crack signalled the shattering of the last of Kankuro's puppets, leaving him defenceless. Suddenly the feeling surged back into Sakura's legs. Without any conscious thought she propelled herself forwards. She had no plan, no idea, no nothing; just one single thought that kept circulating around her brain. _This has to stop, now!_

She ran on, heedless of the danger that being in close proximity with two wanted criminals bought. A stray kunai flew towards her and she parried it easily. It was then, pushing a few strands of hair out of her eyes that she caught the shocked expression written all over Deidara's features. Without meaning to, her legs slowed and came to a standstill but before she could even contemplate a course of action her mind was jerked back to reality by something much more pressing.

She heard it before she saw it. The whistle of an object as it hurtled through the air then a flash of metal right before it hit its target. Sakura's jade orbs widened in shock as she watched the metal tip of the tail slice though Kankuro's flesh like it was butter. A cry tore from her lips as she ran towards him, catching him just before he reached the floor.

"Kankuro?" She whispered fearfully, not bothering to staunch the gaping hole that passed right through his body. Tears unbidden welled up in her eyes, spilled out onto her cheeks and trickled to the ground leaving glistening trails in their wake. He had only moments to live and it was all her fault. "I'm so sorry! I- I should have got here more quickly!"

Through a haze of pain he managed to focus his brown eyes on hers with great effort. "N-No i- it wasn't your f-" He struggled to form the words, while fighting to stay conscious. With every passing second more blood leaked from the hole in his chest soaking Sakura's clothes and staining the sand red. His eyes met hers for one last time as he gave a great shudder and lay still.

"No!" She turned around to face the two Akatsuki members but they were gone. "What the hell is wrong with you!?" she shouted aloud, not caring if they could hear her or not.

She turned her attention back to Kankuro, tears still flowing and wracked with a terrible guilt. She gently closed his eyelids and smoothed back his fringe with a faint caress. If only she hadn't frozen back there! He might still be alive! But a little sarcastic nagging voice in the back of her head replied that if she had there could have been two corpses lying in the dirt instead of one.

No! Surely not! Deidara would have never allowed that to happen, would he? Would he? Sakura found she wasn't sure of anything anymore. All her choices seemed to backfire. She wondered if she should have followed them but to what end? What would that achieve? She would be alone, facing two armed and dangerous shinobi with no backup. Just like Kankuro did she realised with a fresh wave of guilt.

The grit dug painfully into her bare knees but she never bothered to change her position. Equally pointless – at least to Sakura's mind – would be to stem the river of red that soaked her clothes, staining the dark material. Kneeling by his side felt like the least she could do.

Minutes, hours or even days later, Sakura heard the sound of approaching feet and the exclamations of stunned shinobi as they approached the scene.

"We've found them!"

"There in the middle of that street!"

"Where?"

"Over there!"

Sakura was only dimly aware of what they were saying. Her mind seemed to be having trouble placing meaning to the words. She felt numb, hollow and insecure. Her entire world had come crashing down around her and she was left to pick up the pieces, whatever they may be. She wished bitterly that she'd never come to Sunagakure, much less heard his name. And now Kankuro was dead because of her.

"One is the Konoha medic and the other seems to have suffered from a fatal wound! He isn't moving!"

The voices were much closer now.

"Oh my God! It can't be- No! It's Kankuro! He's _dead_!"

"He's dead? Kankuro's dead? _Impossible_!" Murmurs had broken out among the other shinobi as they neared the scene, each not quite able to believe their ears. How could the Kazekage's brother have been beaten so soundly they wondered, eyes taking in the ruined puppets and the gaping wound in his chest.

"Someone get the Kazekage quick!" One of the sand shinobi attempted to ease Sakura away from Kankuro's body but she wouldn't budge.

"But we can't let him see him like this…"

"Too late".

Sakura raised her head. Sure enough the Kazekage surrounded by his usual bodyguards approached the scene, striding purposefully towards the disaster, dark eyes narrowed slightly, unaware of the tragedy that awaited them. Surrounded by all the dark-haired shinobi of Sunagakure, Gaara's red hair made him stand out like a fox among sheep. His distinctive crop of burgundy hair was considered unusual even by Suna's standards and that was without mentioning the outfit that symbolised his status as leader of the village.

The tugging at Sakura's sleeve became more persistent and so she relented, allowing the shinobi to lead her away, sensing even in her current state that it would definitely be within her best interests to leave. The world had taken on a surreal quality; her vision became blurred, she was barely aware of the people and buildings that rushed by in varying shades of grey and black. She trusted wholly in the smooth, firm grip of the brown hand that guided her among the scattered formation of houses that fashioned the haphazard streets.

"Are you hurt?" The shinobi turned to face her when they were a few streets away.

"No" Sakura replied, staring curiously into his face. It seemed strangely familiar to her; like the face of one from a distant past or another lifetime. A white tarpaulin scarf covered his head completely and loosely concealed the left side of his face. Strange red marks – that oddly reminded Sakura of Kiba – adorned his visible cheek. She gestured at the blood. "It's not mine," she explained hollowly.

"Ah, I see," was his only response. He did not pursue the topic, for which Sakura was grateful.

She glanced back the way they came, wondering if Gaara had reached his brother yet and expecting at any moment to see the colossal shape of Shukaku erupting from the buildings behind her. She shivered remembering her last encounter with the beast. Out in the woods away from civilisation was fine but in the middle of a populated area? Some of her trepidation must have shown on her face for her companion sighed.

"Do not worry. Kazekage-sama will never harm this village," he said in an attempt to pacify her feelings.

"How do you-," Sakura questioned, not entirely convinced but she was interrupted almost immediately.

"Do you really think so little of him?" the man replied, a hint of exasperation colouring his tone. "He is our Kazekage. We would not have chosen him to lead this village lightly." Sakura was surprised by the strength of his conviction. "A kage's first duty is to protect the village, is it not? I am confident that he will not fail. He is not the angry child he once was. He has come a long way since the Chunin exams Sakura".

It was then that she remembered. He was one of the overseers for the Chunin exam and part of Suna's advisory council, she realised. He must have been one of the few to see Gaara progress as a ninja and a person, perhaps being one of the few in the village that had the opportunity to get to know him on a personal level.

"I- I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that," she stammered, thoroughly embarrassed.

It was then that a threatening swirl of sand whipped down the narrow passageway, pinching at their garments and hair. Gaara had discovered his brother seemingly.

"Lets finish this inside" Baki gestured at a nearby office block and Sakura nodded her head gratefully.

* * *

Sakura swirled the dregs at the bottom of her fourth cup of tea absentmindedly, watching as it formed a mini typhoon, a miniature version of the sandstorm that had howled and raged outside for the better part of an hour. She stared listlessly at the shiny, plastic table in front of her, gripping her mug so hard it nearly broke.

Baki had departed from the building twenty minutes ago, stating that he was going to fetch a woman named Chiyo and leaving the pink-haired medic to her own devices. Sakura found she didn't mind. She was still digesting the events of tonight. Her mind wandered, alternating between a reiteration of the conversation Baki and her had shared and replaying the scene that had occurred minutes before.

_"How did it happen?" were the first words Baki had uttered in the last ten minutes. Upon arriving at the building he had proceeded to make them both a very strong cup of tea, allowing Sakura to compose herself before she recounted the events that had just unfolded._

_She had described the member of the Akatsuki who had blocked Kankuro's every attack with ease, the metal tail protruding from under the cloak, Kankuro's final moments. Her voice died in her throat, preventing her from continuing._

_"And the criminals, they just left?" Baki asked sceptically._

_"Yeah," Sakura frowned, mentally adding that question to the list of things she wanted to ask. "Perhaps they thought they would be discovered if they stayed."_

_"Perhaps," Baki echoed._

_"I don't understand. Why would they wait so long to free him? The night before he was to be executed? That's cutting it a little close, don't you think?" Sakura's wide eyes gazed imploringly at the weather-beaten face, evidence of one who had been subjected to the harshness of the desert many times over the years._

_"Did you received no hint of the prisoner's intentions?" Baki asked. "No change in mood that might have indicated-"_

_"No there was nothing," she shook her head. "What about during the interrogation?"_

_Baki stared at her evenly for a moment before replying. "No. He was a very hard man to break," he divulged reluctantly; clearly the interrogation was something he did not wish to discuss. It had been almost a complete waste of time after all. Even Sakura could not boast that she had discovered a great deal about the Akatsuki from him. The topic had rarely been breached in all the long hours the medic had spent in that room. Deidara seemed to have played his cards very close to his chest, right until the end._

_"Do you have any theories as to why they'd wait, Baki-san?" Sakura questioned._

_Baki looked at her for a moment, taking in her dishevelled appearance and defiant eyes. _

_"Alright," he conceded. "I believe that it wasn't an accident that Kankuro was the first to discover the two criminals."_

_There was a sharp intake of breath from the woman across him. "What?"_

_"Think about it for a moment," Baki explained. "Do you not think it ironic that out of all the shinobi in this village it was Kankuro that found them? Killing him would definitely slant in the Akatsuki's favour because out of all the shinobi in the village, Kankuro's death is one of the few that would affect Gaara the most."_

_He paused for a minute, taking the opportunity to stare at the maelstrom of grief and rage that still roared outside and then continued. "We cannot assume that just because one of their members was captured by the village the Akatsuki's motives have changed. Which means Gaara-sama is still a prime target. With all the extra security in the village it would be impossible for them to target him in the same way again. Within the confines of the village, Gaara remains – for the most part – untouchable."_

_"However," Baki breathed a deep sigh. "The same does not remain true for his siblings."_

_"They needed a way to draw Gaara out," Sakura said grimly._

_"Indeed. So far their plan has succeeded," he gestured to the sandstorm outside. "No amount of convincing will sway the Kazekage's mind now. He will be determined to avenge his brother's death personally. He is exactly where they want him: angry, irrational and emotionally involved. I doubt any of us could stop him now. All we can do is attempt to protect him as best we can."_

_Sakura mimicked Baki's action; her green eyes watched the sea of grit and dirt flail threateningly outside, separated from them only by a sheet of glass. She had to admit Baki's words made perfect sense. The trap had been well laid._

_"One thing remains," Baki said, jerking Sakura out of her thoughts. "Whether Deidara's accomplice was indeed a member of the Akatsuki – though I do not doubt it at this point. How were you sure?"_

_"His cloak," she supplied readily. "All members of the Akatsuki wear a black cloak adorned with red clouds."_

_She gave the Jonin a brief description of the squat figure with a gravelly voice._

_"He had the symbol of a red scorpion? Are you sure?" Baki pressed anxiously, cutting her off mid-sentence._

_"Yes," she confirmed. "Why-?"_

_"I'm sorry Sakura but there's somewhere I must be," he apologised. "If you are correct then that man must be Sasori of the Red Sands. He was a citizen of this village once upon a time. One of his relatives still survives; an elderly woman that goes by the name of Chiyo. Perhaps she can shed some light upon this."_

_At the door he paused. "Feel free to make yourself another cup of tea if you wish. The kitchen is just through that door and there are some biscuits in the cupboard if you are hungry."_

_Sakura murmured her thanks. The noise level increased as he opened the door – the wind howling as veraciously as ever – and a smattering of sand littered the floor. Then he was gone._

In fact, she had made three cups of tea in the time he had been gone but the biscuits in the tin remained untouched. Her stomach churned horribly and she wasn't hungry enough to risk eating just yet.

She had decided to mention nothing of the relationship that had begun to blossom since she had entered the Sand to Baki and when asked about why she was out so late she had even managed to come up with a half-decent excuse – that she was intending to visit the training grounds situated outside the village to brush up on her skills. A stroke of brilliance that Sakura wouldn't have believed was possible in her near comatose state.

It was just another one of her nightmares, she tried to convince herself. Any moment she would wave up to the sound of her mother's voice, the delicious smell of fried eggs and bacon wafting up her nose.

But this was reality; her reality. And that was something no amount of convincing could ever change.

Even now she could still feel Kankuro's blood on her hands. She had scrubbed her hands until they had turned a dusky pink, until her hands had become raw and tender yet Sakura could still feel his blood lingering there on the surface. They felt permanently stained.

Every now and then, Deidara's shocked face would pierce her thoughts and she would wince as though an internal blow had struck her. And each time she blocked it out again, with increasing vigour. Why had he looked so shocked to see her? Surely he would have realised that she wouldn't have abandoned him? It hurt to think of him now.

She gritted her teeth as anguish gripped her body, ripping right through her. Pain laced her body, coursing through her like a deadly poison. Her heart pounded furiously as she stood up. Staying here an instant longer was out of the question. She refused to wait for news. She was leaving.

* * *

Sasori sighed, raising an invisible eyebrow and turned around to face his partner who was – once again – lagging behind. One of the things Sasori liked about concealing his face behind Hiroku was that it made it possible for him to exude an air of indifference at all times. Therefore no matter how incensed, displeased, irate, outraged – call it what you like – he was, he could do all this and to an outsider appear to not even bat an eyelid.

"A snail could move faster than you," he growled through his mask of perfect indifference, sparing not one iota of concern for the blonde-haired teenager who straggled along some distance behind him. "I don't like to wait and I don't-"

"-Like to keep people waiting. Yeah I know," Deidara snapped at the puppet master as he forced his muscles to work angrily. At first, what had seemed like an innocent dull throb in his left leg had quickly developed into a sharp, excruciating jab of pain each time his foot touched the shifting sand. Without the healing power of a medic the day before, his wounds had had to heal at a natural pace and deprived from the luxury of rest and recuperation, they had become steadily worse with each step he took. "If you weren't so damn paranoid about wasting the clay I could have flown there!"

"Maybe you shouldn't have wasted so much on your fight with the Kazekage then," Sasori's rebuke was cutting and riddled with impatience. "Perhaps the higher-ups will think twice next time before sending in an incompetent fool like you to do the job half-assed," he hissed.

Deidara glared, his face contorted with fury but in his current state he could do nothing and sensed it wouldn't be wise to try. It was almost like being back in the interrogation room again; furious and yet unable to lash out at anyone in the vicinity. Escaping with Sasori provided only the illusion of freedom and Deidara was no fool. His options were few. Either stay in Sunagakure and be executed or go with Sasori and submit to the will of Akatsuki once more. Once might call it Hobson's choice – or no choice at all. Though the chakra bands had been long since removed from his wrists his hands were still tied in chains. Invisible chains they might be, but they were still chains.

The plan rankled him – sneaking around just wasn't his style. Besides he was beginning to take an apathetic view towards the success of the mission. What did it matter if they caught the Kazekage really? He supposed the one thing he should be glad of was that at least Sakura didn't get involved in all of this. No one would survive this second encounter with them. But it was hard to be appreciative of that fact when every step forward caused his nerves to shudder angrily in response to the movement. He hoped that wherever Sakura was, she'd have the sense to stay away.

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**A/N: **Please click the pretty review button at the bottom of the page. It would really make my day :)


	10. Picking Up The Pieces

**A/N:** Thanks a million to **XxXWolvesInTheNightXxX**, **Angel's Wiin****gs, Cold Fyre, Kagome873, Cassange, Miera Evenstar, QueenVamp, .Hated-, Okami X Ko X Bites** and **Millenium Ring** for reviewing - I really appreciate you taking the time. I was very happy when I discovered this was the most reviews I'd ever got for a chapter! Your input means the world to me :)

I'm sorry that I didn't get chapter 10 out sooner but I had severe writers block and well, I'm sure you don't want to hear all of my other excuses. Oh and there's no way of getting around the fact that this is a filler chapter but it had to be written. As much as I'd like to jump to my favourite parts the story would make no sense if I did!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

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**Chapter 10: Picking Up The Pieces**

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"I don't care". The words were spoken with a quiet force; anger – barely containable – simmered dangerously beneath the surface. The words were spoken quietly but easily heard by everyone in the vicinity. A few appeared to be on the verge of reasoning with the furious redhead but accomplished nothing more than opening their mouths uncertainly and then closing them again. None could withstand his gaze.

"I don't care!" The words were louder this time and this time it was easy to detect the feral growl that emanated from deep within the Kazekage's throat. Several council members shifted nervously. "He was my brother damn it!"

Gaara's dark eyes flashed dangerously as he surveyed the room a second time. His pale hands – unnatural for one exposed to the ferocity of the sun on a daily basis – were shaking slightly despite the fact that at this moment they were tightly furled into fists; four sets of nails dug unconsciously into the quivering palms.

To Sakura's relief it hadn't been at all difficult to locate the Kazekage upon leaving the stuffy office building twenty minutes ago. The swirling vortex of sand threatening to overwhelm the council building was a big enough clue of where to find him. On recollection of this, Sakura gave a slight sniff of disgust. It was unlikely that she'd ever be free of the sand that had crept uninvited into her hair and the lining of her clothes. Even the slightest movement aggravated the grit causing it to scratch abrasively across her skin. It was very uncomfortable to say the least. Whatever happened, she hoped she'd have time for a shower and a change of clothes.

She leaned into what she hoped was a more comfortable position against the sandy wall as the heated discussion progressed further with no signs of abating any time soon. She had been surprised upon entering the building demanding to find out what was going on that she'd even been allowed inside the council chambers. She had strode purposefully into the building – doors swinging violently behind her from unexpected force it had come into contact with moments before – demanding to see the Kazekage. Her cheeks had reddened quite substantially when her outburst was met with a quiet assent of "of course" before she was politely led away by the young assistant to meet the council.

Initially, the pink-haired kunoichi had been rather taken aback by this quiet admission – it was standard procedure that every guest needed a signed sheet – but it was apparent upon entering the room why she had gained entry. Almost immediately she had been bombarded with questions – it made little difference that Baki had briefed them on the matter; they wanted to hear it first-hand. Throughout this exchange, Gaara had been the only one to remain quiet but Sakura had not looked his way very often. She had found his gaze unnerving.

She had not been ordered to leave the room once the council was satisfied with her answers and so she saw no reason to leave. She had wanted answers and now she would get them. Sakura wished they had thought to offer her a chair though as the wall was rough and uneven but to all intents and purposes she was invisible to the council members the moment she ceased to be their object of interest.

She peered out of the window and stifled a yawn. The sun had begun to rise about an hour ago and as it progressed through the sky, Sakura watched it transform the inky, dark world into a glittering, golden paradise in a matter of minutes.

Gaara was speaking again. Sakura brought her attention back from the window in time for him to say, "I know how it sounds. There is a good chance it will be a trap but I cannot wait here for the results. As long as there are enough shinobi at-"

"You don't know that," a dark-skinned representative interjected, rather rudely Sakura thought but then again they had been debating this same point for well over an hour.

Gaara turned his dark-rimmed eyes on the man for a second. "As I said, if there are enough shinobi assigned-"

There was a subtle knock on the door before two people entered the room unannounced. One Sakura recognised immediately as Baki – the jonin that had questioned her mere hours ago – and the other was completely unrecognisable. Sakura watched as a squat old woman with short, stout grey hair followed him into the room, a look of contempt upon her aged face. A few poorly concealed sighs punctuated the air.

Sakura rearranged her position on the wall so as to have a better look. This was clearly the woman Baki had mentioned. She was curious to see the sole surviving relative of Deidara's partner, Sasori and upon comparing her face to his was disappointed to find no resemblance whatsoever.

"Sorry, for the interruption," Baki spoke to the silent crowd. "I'm sure most of you know Chiyo-baasama," he paused as he gestured at the motionless woman beside him. "She is here at my request to shed some light on the situation and she tells me, to assist in the elimination of the two infiltrators".

Sakura heaved a great sigh. So it was already decided what to do with Deidara and the other member of the Akatsuki on coming into contact with them. She must have missed that part of the meeting but she wasn't wholly surprised. After all they had planned on executing Deidara at sunrise. She realised with a jolt that it would have already been carried out by now if that had been the case. She rifled though her chaotic emotions in an attempt to make sense of the tangled web inside her – thoughts and feelings all clamouring to be heard. Had she been wrong? Had the Sand shinobi been right in sentencing him to death? She was adamant to see him again. The truth was all that mattered now.

Through her musings, Sakura had missed almost the entirety of the conversation that took place between the elderly woman and the council. She found she didn't particularly care. A sense of restlessness was upon her; she was itching for the council to come to some sort of decision and then they could leave. Aside from the desire to seek reassurance from Deidara and simultaneously want to punch his head through a brick wall, Sakura's thoughts began to dwell on her teammates. As far as she was aware nothing had been heard from them as of yet and she wrestled with the pit of anxiety in her stomach that expanded as her fears exacerbated. She refused to think about Kankuro, lest she lose control again. Even now, she was unsure why she had gone to pieces like that; after all he was not the first shinobi she had watched die.

When she tuned back in she found, to her disappointment that they were back to the same old argument.

"Be as that may, we need you here in the village Kazekage-sama! The village needs-"

"Might I suggest," Chiyo interrupted looking thoroughly annoyed. Many members looked around with a start; they seemed to have forgotten she was there. "Might I suggest that the Kazekage is unlikely to fulfil his duties in such a situation. He is hardly likely to care about paperwork when his own brother was murdered in the early hours of the morning and his killer is still on the loose just a few scant hours away".

"Yes, but that's no excuse to-"

"Furthermore," she raised her voice slightly and Sakura was surprised to hear a steely edge to it. "As Sand Shinobi will undoubtedly be dispatched to combat the members of the Akatsuki, the Kazekage should be allowed to join them as a member of the Sunagakure. He has as much right as anyone else."

"But Chiyo-baasama-"

"And finally," Chiyo fixed her beady stare on all of them. "Do you really think any of you can stop him? I can only see two choices before you; allow Gaara-sama to pursue the Akatsuki with a heavy guard consisting of some of our best shinobi or forbid him and he will go regardless, without the protection of this village".

As the council members finally agreed, Sakura couldn't quite suppress the small smile which sprung to her lips.

The council had given them one hour. One hour in which to prepare for the imminent conflict and convene at the east gates. That gave Sakura enough time to have a quick shower and change out of her filthy clothes. Fortunately her gear was already packed thanks to her preparation for her unofficial mission to help Deidara escape. Her nerves jangled as she slid into her customary outfit which she had not worn since she first arrived. She had made her decision but it was not enough to quell the butterflies that tickled the lining of her stomach.

More than half the shinobi had arrived when Sakura caught site of the big yellow gates that led to the outside world. Most were milling around, bored and restless, but the Kazekage could be seen staring out towards the tumultuous sands that raged beyond the safety of the village. Sakura only hoped that Gaara would stem the violent storm that seethed wrathfully across the exposed desert. She was not keen to have another encounter with the gritty sand.

It was after ten minutes of hovering around uncertainly that Baki noticed her. She was quickly assigned to the third team until the rendezvous with her own teammates. Her feet welcomed the relief as she settled down comfortably on the floor, waiting for the signal to move out. The men she'd been assigned with had taken the news of the temporary addition to their group without the barest flick of emotion. They were grim-faced and unusually quiet. Everyone it seemed was waiting for the signal.

Sakura began to grow bored. The sun was already more than a third of the way through its cycle across the sky and the air took on a stuffy quality as the ground began to heat up. How long did it take for a group of shinobi to be dispatched in this village she thought, almost bored to tears. She swatted away an irksome fly, wishing that any moment now Gaara would give the signal to move out. At least the storm had abated.

A sudden commotion to the left piqued Sakura's interest. She was just in time to see a red angry-faced Temari push through the crowd and march straight up to Gaara, her face contorted with fury and her wild bushy hair no longer restrained by the two hair bands that normally bound them.

"Gaara!" Sakura noted the apparent disuse of his title. "What the hell are you thinking? If you-"

The wind picked up in volume and Sakura had to strain to hear the next few words.

"…can't stand it! I can't stand losing both my brothers in one day!"

Her voice clearly borne on the wind was loud and shrill; her tone slightly hysterical. Gaara's muttered response was unintelligible over the oncoming gale. Despite the fact that most shinobi barely even raised their heads, Sakura could tell that they were listening hard. Several even openly stared at the siblings, not even pretending to conceal their interest.

Contrary to her companions, Sakura ceased to listen to the siblings bicker, reflecting briefly that she'd witnessed enough pain and worry to last a lifetime. She dragged a single finger through the sand, disrupting the tiny little stones with one single swipe.

"… if you refuse to back down then I'm coming with you!"

Disjointed phrases and heated retorts filtered back to Sakura's ears over the chilling wind. She screwed her eyes shut in concentration.

"No. That's out of the question". Gaara's voice had risen an octave in response to Temari's frantic tones.

Some courses of action – though seemingly insignificant at the time – could have enormous repercussions. Was it really possible to gauge the effects of a single random thoughtless act, Sakura wondered. Had she been more vigilant, would Deidara's true motives have eluded her? Had she more courage, would Kankuro be alive and well?

"But-"

Sakura shook her head tiredly, dislodging a few stray grains of sand that had somehow become wedged in between the pink strands of hair as she did so. She ignored the snatches of conversation floating back to her borne on the wind, now totally submerged in her own musings.

_No_, she reprimanded sharply. It would be foolish to wonder what could have happened now. Hesitation would most likely get her killed in battle. She could not afford to waver indecisively when faced with a potential enemy, no matter who they were.

_Even if it was D-_

"No!" The fiercely spoken word broke her train of thought. "That's not something you can ask of me Gaara!" Temari continued, now close to tears. "That's just something I cannot do!"

"I'm not asking, I'm telling".

"Gaara-"

"That's an order!"

She sent him a look of deep resentment and turned on her heel. "I won't forget this".

Sakura looked up in time to register an irate Temari storm back towards the village. Vaguely she wondered exactly what had occurred between the two siblings but before her thoughts were even half-formed people were beginning to stand up so she abandoned them. She brushed her garments clean of sand and joined the throng of shinobi making for the exit, not alone in expressing her relief that the wait was over at long last.

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"Sakura-chan!" The ecstatic shout echoed, strangely magnified across the blisteringly hot desert. A smile tugged at Sakura's lips creating a strange sensation in her mouth as she worked the foreign muscles. It felt like years ago that she had last genuinely smiled and not just a couple of days.

She shielded her eyes against the burning sun, scarcely managing to discern the dark outlines of six shinobi approaching through the glaring light. She blinked and the foremost shape came into focus, his brilliant golden hair gleaming in the sunlight.

Yep, there was no doubt about it. It was definitely Naruto. The smile that was threatening to overwhelm her features turned into an all-out grin. Despite this, her brain was having difficulty processing the fact that they were all alive and unharmed. She had been certain that something had befallen them on their mission, certain that the scenarios played out in her dreams would have become reality. Slowly a feeling of relief swept over her, like a friendly gust of wind banishing a formidable, dark raincloud that threatened to engulf her. She was pleased to see that her fears had proven unfounded.

Several stunning sunlight minutes later and the two bands of shinobi converged on one another. Without preamble Sakura crossed the gap separating them, not sorry to leave behind the stoic team to which she had been assigned. The sudden appearance of her friends had breathed new life into her; footsteps that had dragged reluctantly across the sand minutes before now danced lightly over it. A warm, fiery golden ball of hope had ignited inside her; temporarily washing her clean of her doubts and fears.

Her sharp jade eyes surveyed the scene critically, noting that the others; Gai, Lee, Ten Ten and Neji hung back allowing the reunion as much privacy as the situation allowed and – her breath almost caught in her throat – they all bore the tell-tale signs of being in battle. However, upon closer inspection her fears were assuaged as it appeared that the majority of damage sustained was limited to ripped clothing and cuts and bruises – they were relatively unharmed. Sakura breathed again.

"Naruto-kun, Kakashi-sensei!" she gushed excitedly. "I didn't expect to find you here!"

"Hello Sakura," Kakashi gave her a crinkled one-eyed smile while Naruto simply grinned.

Within moments Gai and Kakashi detached themselves from the group with the intention of speaking to the Kazekage and Sakura used the opportunity to sidle closer to Naruto and bombard him with questions.

"How did you know where to find us?" she asked curiously once she was sure they were no longer the centre of attention. She glanced towards the members of Team Guy once more, almost as if to make sure they were there. The situation seemed surreal-like, almost as if she was dreaming.

"We crossed paths with one of the scouts this morning," Naruto supplied, flashing one of his famous smiles. "We were on our way back anyway".

"I was so worried," Sakura said quietly. "When there was no news I thought..." she trailed off, instinctively shying away from voicing those unspoken words.

"There's no need to worry about us, Sakura-chan," Naruto said with his usual enthusiasm, blue eyes sparkling. "We can take care of ourselves!"

"Hmm," Sakura wished she had his confidence. Perhaps it was lucky that Kakashi chose to come back at that moment for Naruto was showing signs of wanting to question her about her last few days in Suna. She found it was still quite a sensitive topic.

"We're leaving now," he informed them, as people started to move all around them, preparing to head east once more.

"You didn't talk for long," Sakura noted. "What did Gaara tell you?"

She glanced back towards the Kazekage, barely visible amongst the guards; a furious look marring his features. Perhaps it was Sakura's imagination or was there a mini tornado swirling around his feet?

"The bare minimum," Kakashi replied. "He seemed to think it would be quicker if you filled us in on the way".

"Great," Sakura kicked the sand despondently. "Just great".

Kakashi looked as though he was about to say something but decided against it.

The three of them walked in silence for a while, each lost in their own thoughts. Sakura was shocked that Naruto had for once learnt some tact, at least until she realised that his silence was due to his preoccupation with shielding some food from a sudden flurry of sand rather than out of consideration for her feelings.

Soon she could stand it no longer.

"Did you find him?" The words tumbled out of the pink-haired kunoichi's mouth as she sought for some kind of answer in her sensei's face. She fought to remove all traces of eagerness from her face as she waited for his reply, practically burning with curiosity.

He appeared to contemplate the matter for a moment before shaking his head.

"You didn't?" Sakura turned her attention to the others several paces behind them, hoping they would contradict her but no one did. Kakashi's reply was mirrored in each of their faces.

"But you fought someone," she grabbed onto that knowledge desperately, hoping that she could unravel at least part of the mystery surrounding the events of the previous night. "Didn't you?"

"Ey weret wareen a coake wih couds," came a muffled response from somewhere to her right. Naruto appeared to have won the battle for his food. "Sorry, I mean they weren't wearing a cloak with clouds".

"They weren't?" Sakura was confused. She couldn't think of anyone else who would attack Konoha ninja on Suna ground.

"What Naruto means to say," Kakashi interjected smoothly. "Was that we didn't see anyone per se. Our injuries were sustained from a number of traps laid to slow our progress back to Suna". His dark eyes cast outward over the desert; a look of concern glinted in their murky depths. "Clearly someone wanted us out of the way," he spoke aloud.

"Yeah that makes sense," Sakura agreed. "Sasori wouldn't have wanted to meet reinforcements once out of the village".

She gazed ahead thoughtfully, wishing she could pierce the vast expanse of desert with her eyes alone and imagined the sight of the two Akatsuki trundling on ahead, heads bowed against the wind. Had they reached the edge of the desert yet? Would it prove impossible to follow them or was it like Baki said? They were only biding their time, waiting for the arrival of the Kazekage. And what then? What would Sakura do if she was forced to face Deidara in battle?

To that she had no answers.

"Who's Sasori?" The words filtered back to her as though through deep water, dislodging her from her train of thought.

She shook her head in an attempt to bring herself back to reality. It was with surprise that she found Naruto's bright blue eyes watching her curiously, evidently waiting for an answer.

"I'm sorry, what?" she asked distractedly, unable to banish the image of her and Deidara on opposing sides of the field from her head.

"Who's Sasori?" Naruto repeated impatiently. "Is he the guy we were tracking?"

"Yes," Sakura said tiredly. "He was the other member of the Akatsuki. Last night he helped Deidara escape and," she sighed. "We're tracking them now". She wondered if she could get away with explaining it that briefly.

"How do you know his name?"

Apparently not. She sighed, resigned to recounting the entire story, or as little of it as she could get away with.

"I gave a description of him to Baki-san – he's a jonin in the Sand village – and he told me that the red scorpion is his symbol. Apparently Chiyo-baasama – that elderly woman over there," she pointed unnecessarily "is a relative of his. That's why she's here".

"Oh," Naruto's curiosity seemed sated for the moment and Sakura heaved a sigh of relief but it was short-lived.

"You saw Sasori then?" Kakashi asked curiously. "Were you alone or were there others with you?"

"Well there was Kankuro but..." She took a deep steadying breath and willed herself to continue. Once she had mustered the courage to start talking again she immediately felt better; the word flowed from her lips effortlessly. It felt wonderful to pour out everything she was feeling – or almost, she refused to enlighten them on the past week or so she spent with Deidara – it was as though her teammates acted as a siphon for her fears and regrets.

Ten minutes later and she fell silent, looking up into their faces for the first time since she started talking: Kakashi looked worried; Naruto furious.

"That explains a lot," Kakashi mused thoughtfully. "I wondered why the Kazekage was here. It appeared to me as though Suna wasn't taking this threat seriously. Now I understand".

"They tried to stop him coming," Sakura said with a half-glance at the Gaara. "But he refused to back down".

"Kankuro's dead?" Naruto snarled disbelievingly, having not listened to a single word of what the other two said. "He's dead?"

Sakura noting the warning signs grabbed his arm.

"Look there's nothing we can do, okay?" Sakura wondered who she was trying to reassure; Naruto or herself? "You'll get your chance later, if Gaara doesn't beat you to it," she added grimly.

"It looks like we'll have to wait until tomorrow anyway," Kakashi commented lightly. "It's getting late".

It was then that Sakura noticed that they were fast leaving the desert behind. She had been so immersed in their conversation that she hadn't realised. The horizon was no longer flat and smooth; instead fantastic rock formations littered the skyline. A smattering of trees brought colour to the otherwise barren land and the ground was firm and unyielding under her grip. Looking down Sakura was surprised to see rough tufts of grass had sprung up everywhere like weeds, choking the small pebbles that coated the floor. Last of all, Sakura's eyes settled on the sky which was steadily growing darker by the minute. Kakashi was right. They would go no further today.

As if to enunciate that fact, the company came to a halt. It was a good place for a camp, Sakura thought as she surveyed the area. They were standing on a flat piece of ground between two colossal rocks which protected them from the wind. A brook gushed through the valley, keeping up a constant stream of chatter as it flowed over the stones and the turf was light and springy.

She was so exhausted from a day of high emotions and tensions that she barely registered the flurry of hand signs from one of the Sand shinobi a few paces away as he released a number of shabby tents from a heavy scroll partially unfurled on the floor. The sensation of people jostling past her finally brought her back to her senses and so she picked up the first tent she laid hands on and marched off to the edge of the camp choosing a smooth patch a little ways from the rest of the tents. She turned the brown canvas over in her hands. It was small and smelt faintly of mould but she was pleased to see that at least her tent did not have gaping holes in the roof like some of the others.

Most people had already erected their tents by now so it was with mounting impatience that Sakura hunted through the canvas bag for the wooden mallet. After several moments of furious searching, her fingers grasped something large and heavy which she pulled out of the bag with a flourish. The next moment she dropped it with a sigh of exasperation. The wood was splintered down the middle and Sakura knew instantly that one good whack would render the mallet unusable.

"Stupid hunk of crap," Sakura sighed and threw it into a nearby bush with unwonted venom. She then proceeded to ram the wooden pegs into the ground with the base of her fist, secretly glad of her superhuman strength.

A sharp crack emitted from the sixth peg and Sakura examined the wooden stick in the failing light. It was snapped cleanly in two.

"Guess I applied too much chakra," she observed dryly, pulling the sad remains of the peg from the ground. She walked over to the canvas bag to check for spares and wondered vaguely if she could steal one off Kakashi's tent without him noticing.

"Do you need help with that?" An overly enthusiastic voice made her look up. It was Lee. "Don't worry Sakura, I shall find you a new peg! Just leave it to me! I'll make sure you have the best tent in the camp!"

"Great," Sakura tried to sound pleased. "I'll be back in a minute. There's something I need to do".

"Sure Sakura-chan," Lee replied. "I shall finish the tent in your stead!"

"Thanks".

Sakura heaved a sigh of relief. She supposed she should feel guilty that she lied but all she felt was a sense relief at being freed from the company of others. No one had even an inkling of what she was going through. They couldn't understand so she'd rather be left alone.

There was still half an hour of daylight left so Sakura decided to climb a small rocky mountain in the distance – larger by far than the two the camp was sheltered by. It seemed preferable to milling around the camp where she would be undoubtedly be subjected to Lee's incessant chatter and the questioning gazes of her teammates once they realised she hadn't told them everything.

It took her ten minutes to climb up the precipice but Sakura relished in the physical exercise. She smiled as her muscles burned with fatigue and her fingers instinctively sought for crevices in the rock face, pausing only to catch her breath on ledges scattered sporadically along the ascent. She refrained from using chakra, revelling in something that was totally non-shinobi. It was just her against the elements and she liked it that way.

Almost too soon it seemed she reached the summit. But there was already someone there.

"Who is that?" Sakura called out, fear clutching at her throat. She stumbled backwards as the silhouette – outlined clearly against the setting sun – straightened up from their sitting position on a smooth, flat boulder.

"Don't be frightened child, I mean you no harm," the shadow advanced on her slowly and Sakura backed away alarmed.

"Who are you?"

"Honestly girl, don't you recognise me from the meeting in the council chambers? Or are Konoha shinobi as dim-witted as they look?" Sakura blinked and her vision cleared. She found herself face-to-face with a squat elderly woman bent with age who proffered her a gnarled hand. She took it hesitantly. The woman had an amused smile on her face.

"Looks like I wasn't the only one with this idea". The words were not harsh or bitter, just stating a simple fact. The woman – Chiyo stared out across the vast expanse of wilderness thoughtfully. "You came up here to think. Am I right?"

"How can you tell?" Sakura asked with a hint of alarm. Was it really that obvious?

"Everyone who comes here does," Chiyo replied simply, eyes fixed upon the horizon. "My husband proposed to me on this hill".

"It seems like the perfect place," Sakura said, taking in the stunning sunset vista which casted elongated shadows over the rock formations, gnarled trees and rolling hills. Her keen jade eyes spied a rabbit as it darted through the trees far below. Some might call this place ugly but Sakura thought it was beautiful; a rugged, barren, wild kind of beautiful but beautiful all the same. Very much like the woman next to her, she realised.

"It was," Chiyo sighed, settling down on the rock once more. "But it was all so long ago. If only he could see me now". The last few words were uttered under her breath and Sakura was quite sure she was not supposed to have heard. She watched the elderly woman for a few moments whose steely grey eyes raked the skyline, the wind whipping grey tendrils of hair across her aged face.

"You're the kunoichi who was assigned to heal the prisoner?" Chiyo asked abruptly but not unkindly. She seemed merely curious.

Sakura nodded silently.

"And you're related to that other Akatsuki member?" She wondered briefly whether she should broach what could potentially be a very sensitive topic for the old lady but curiosity won out in the end. And Sakura was tired of been left in the dark.

"How do you know that?" Chiyo asked, genuine surprise written all over her features. The question had caught her off-guard. Sakura hoped she was simply shocked and not angry. The expression on her face was unreadable.

There was no point in lying.

"Baki-san told me back in the village".

"That old coot! Sticking his nose in where it doesn't belong," Chiyo scoffed contemptuously, her eyes flashing.

"I'm sorry," Sakura apologised, thoroughly embarrassed. "I shouldn't have said anything. It's none of my-"

"Don't you worry about that," Chiyo waved the apology aside. "You have nothing to be sorry for". She took a deep breath and continued "The man who stole into our village last night and murdered the Kazekage's brother is my grandson".

"Oh," Sakura couldn't think of anything to say as she slowly digested this new piece of information. "I'm sorry," was all she could manage. It seemed like an inadequate response but, she reasoned, what _could_ you say to someone in such a situation?

Thankfully she was spared any further thoughts as Chiyo rose from the smooth rock once more and indicated Sakura should do the same. "It's getting late. We should head back".

Sakura nodded in assent. "I'll be along in a few minutes. I just need some time to think".

* * *

Sakura left the hill quite a while later she than had intended and found to her dismay, that the warmth from the sun had vanished quite suddenly, leaving the rocks icy cold. By a stroke of luck she discovered a rockier, trouble-free descent on the northern spur and apart from circumnavigating the patchy gorse bushes that grew along the ridges she was able to reach the ground without much incident. It was much darker on the ground than up on the precipice and Sakura shivered slightly. She couldn't shake the feeling that she was being watched.

She began to head south, in the direction of the camp. A gurgling, bubbling noise led her to a small, dark stream that wove its way through the little grove of trees. She paused for a second and dipped her slender fingers into the cool, fresh water. Slowly she brought her cupped hands up to her mouth and drank deeply, enjoying the sensation of water trickling down her throat.

It was only once she had drunk her fill and turned to leave that she felt it. A brief prickle of chakra, barely discernable and damn near impossible to identify flared behind her. She spun on her heel, hands flying instantly to the pouch of kunai at her waist.

It was dark among the trees. Sakura could barely make out their ghostly shapes, let alone the potential enemy hiding between them. Reason told her that it was possibly a sentry patrolling the area but instinctively she knew that this was not the case. Nervously she unhooked the strap of her pouch and pulled out a kunai, taking slight comfort in the familiarity of the cool metal poised in her right hand. She reached out her senses, questing for the elusive chakra while her eyes scanned her surroundings.

There was a slight movement in the periphery of her vision and the kunai flew from her fingertips. A dull thud echoed around the clearing that Sakura never registered. Her eyes were fixed on a point to the left of the tree in which the kunai had embedded itself. A man entered the clearing as casually as if it was just a walk in the park, a slight smirk lingering on his lips.

Sakura stumbled back a few steps, completely thrown by his sudden appearance. Her mind was blank, uncomprehending yet she couldn't take her eyes off the familiar figure before her.

"Deidara," she whispered, gazing at his motionless form almost fearfully. The second kunai slipped to the floor unnoticed by either of them.

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**A/N: **Please click the pretty review button at the bottom of the page. It would really make my day :)


	11. Trust

**A/N:** Hello everyone! This chapter is extra long to make up for the long wait between the this update and the last. Also one of my reviewers pointed out to me that some of the earlier chapters were a little fast which was something I'd been thinking anyway so_** I have posted completely rewritten versions of chapter two and three which i highly recommend you check out! **_You'll find a lot of changes; some new scenes and some you'll recognise but different than before and more importantly, more DeiSaku! I am also doing a rewrite of chapter four so watch out for that sometime in the near future. I shall post it in an authors note for a new chapter and my profile page when I have.

Anyway, I hope you all enjoy!

A big thanks to XxXWolvesInTheNightXxX, Okami X Ko X Bites, Angel's Wiings, .Hated-, Doll-Fin Chick, Meira Evenstar, .67, Tadashi Satsu, Sea-Glass88 and Psycho-Killer-Freak for your reviews. They were very much appreciated! :)

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto

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**Chapter 11: Trust**

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A light, soothing breeze ruffled amicably through the coarse tufts of grass like a small child threading its fingers through a thick furry hide – a breeze that brought with it the smell of fresh, wild flowers and a hint of woodland. The sweet scent suffused through the pink-haired medic's nostrils; the overpowering aroma almost overriding her senses as she took deep shuddering breaths in an attempt to control her erratic breathing and thudding heart. Small tremors rippled over her skin in waves yet her eyes remained steadily fixed upon the blonde-haired figure that watched her calmly from the tree line.

An owl hooted softly from overhead, hidden by the dense canopy of leaves which encased the surrounding woodland in a thin membrane of foliage and left the clearing open to the elements. The sky had long since darkened to a deep midnight blue, unbroken except for the tiny pinpricks of light which marked the heavens but these natural wonders were lost on the two shinobi that faced each other. They had eyes only for each other.

Sakura watched the man across the clearing warily, refusing to take her eyes off him for even an instant. Her mind struggled to comprehend why the wanted criminal would dare to reveal himself to her so openly. She was a Konoha kunoichi. He knew that. He should also know that she wouldn't hesitate to turn him in if he turned out to be a threat, which was looking more likely with every passing second.

A slight movement from the man had Sakura moving fluidly into an attack position without thought before she realised that he was simply walking across the clearing – with all the time in the world, apparently.

As he came out from under the safety of the trees he was bathed in pure, incandescent moonlight which accentuated his features turning his hair a pale silver and not for the first time Sakura was struck by how attractive he was right down to that infuriating little smirk he favoured but she shoved the unwelcome emotions into a small recess at the back of her mind to deal with later, if she chose. The moonlight served another purpose; highlighting his garments for the first time. Sakura hissed and clenched her fists instinctively for there was a cloak shrouding his clothes. A cloak covered in red clouds. A sharp pang of sadness jabbed at her insides upon realising which path he'd chosen. She chastised herself mentally for leaving herself open to such vulnerability. He was a member of the Akatsuki, she reminded herself. She should never have trusted him to begin with!

"What do you want?" The medic sent Deidara what she considered to be a well-deserved glare, full of open hostility and as she'd expected, that glare halted his slow progress across the glade.

"Sakura-," he breathed. His eyes widened in shock at her rebuff but she knew it was all an act.

"Don't-" she cut him off sharply, weary of his incessant lies. She exhaled deeply and took a moment to compose herself before speaking once more. The underlying anger in her tone was impossible to mistake. "You have some nerve showing your face again after what you did," she spat out venomously.

She expected him to deny it, to make excuses and promises he couldn't keep, but not a sound passed his lips. He only looked at her with his unerring blue gaze and began to wend his way through the tall grasses, cutting a green, dewy path through the undergrowth and effectively lessening the gap between them. To her horror, Sakura felt slightly disappointed. A small part concealed deep inside her had _wanted_ him to lie to her, to tell her that everything was going to be okay; but that was all it would be. A lie.

Her eyes stung with anger and betrayal as she watched the blonde, now only a few metres away. She spun on her heel and faced the stream, unable to look at his face any longer. A deep ache throbbed inside her chest and she was suddenly gasping for air.

"Sakura". She ignored Deidara's murmered words and lifted her head skywards, jade eyes tracing the celestial pattern of stars across the sky as they burned with anger and humiliation. She jerked away when he touched her pink hair with a soft caress, re-establishing the distance between them. It was too much. How could he expect to come back and for everything to fall into place? For everything to be as it was? It would never be the same!

"Don't touch me!" She seethed, swatting his hand away furiously. "I believed you Deidara! I _trusted_ you! And all this time you've been plotting-"

He shocked her into silence with the simple act of grabbing her wrists. A strange expression played across his face, an emotion akin to regret but Sakura, furious at his lack of respect for her personal space failed to notice. "Believe me I never wanted this," he muttered urgently. It was crucial for her to understand. "I never plan-"

"Get away from me!" She spat, recovering from her initial surprise. She wrenched her wrists from his grasp and glared at him with naked fury in her eyes. "You lying, cheating-"

She wasn't even vaguely aware of how loudly she was shouting. The woods rang with her words as she siphoned off her anger and rage into the only outlet that was available, the source of her pain: Deidara. In that moment she didn't care if the screams and shouts brought down an entire patrol of shinobi or even several. She was literally shaking, her voice raw with anger.

"Sakura, please listen-" Deidara pleaded desperately, very conscious of the fact that their chance meeting might not stay secret for long. "Listen to me!"

"No! If you think that for one minute I'll stand to listen to your lies then you're wrong!" Sakura deflected his words instantly, unwilling to give the Akatsuki member even an inch of leeway.

"You don't understand!"

"What don't I understand!" She replied, now dangerously close to tears. "All I know is that you wouldn't trust me enough to tell me what was going on! You never trusted me enough to let me on your plan to escape! You let Sasori kill Kankuro! You're a member of the Akatsuki! It doesn't matter to you who you hurt or how many people die just so you can live, I can't believe how stupid I was for thinking you were different!"

"It wasn't like that, yeah!" Sakura's words had hit a nerve seemingly. Deidara's breathing was ragged and shallow and his hands were balled tightly into curled fists. "I have never lied to you! I was no more expecting Sasori's arrival than you were!"

"I don't believe you," Sakura retorted, ignoring the seed of doubt that had begun to niggle away at her brain.

Deidara heaved a great sigh and ran a hand through his hair distractedly. "Look, I didn't come here to argue. I want you to leave. It's too dangerous for you to be here, Sakura".

Sakura threw him a look she reserved only for her mother whenever she suggested that perhaps it was time for her to stop this kunoichi nonsense and settle down with a nice young man.

"You expect me to believe that?" She laughed humourlessly. "Even if you're right and it is too dangerous, I would stay regardless. I won't abandon my friends".

Deidara looked like he was about to argue but at that very moment he stiffened in surprise.

"Someone's coming".

"I guess you'd better get going then," Sakura replied faking nonchalance. She struggled to meet his sapphire-eyed gaze which reminded her so strongly of the constant, yet ever-changing ocean. She couldn't bear to stare at a concrete reminder of all her recent mistakes any longer. He had once called her naive. He had been right. Well, she had learned her lesson.

Deidara opened his mouth and then closed it again.

"Fine," he conceded, albeit reluctantly. "Fine, just take this".

Sakura's fingers instinctively curled around the hard, cool handle of a kunai which had inexplicably found its way into her hand as Deidara reached for a small, black leather pouch at his waist, previously concealed by the dark fabric of his cloak. The idea of threatening the Akatsuki to stop what he was doing with said kunai crossed Sakura's mind several times but indecisiveness held its sway over her and by the time she had decided, a small lump of something soft and malleable was sitting in the palm of his hand. She squinted through the gloom curiously in an attempt to discern the properties of the unknown object but before she even had a chance, a moist pink tongue protruded from the palm and curled itself expertly round the object. In a flash it disappeared. Sakura barely had time to wonder – time in which was spent observing the surface of the palm which chewed and munched much the same way as any normal mouth would. She would have been appalled – had she known it – to discover that her mouth opened slightly in shock. The only indication that Deidara noticed was a slight lift to the corner of his mouth. Some people, he thought wryly, were just too easy to please.

After several seconds of chewing the palm quivered and fell still. Sakura tried and failed to wipe her face clean of a rapt expression as the pink tongue made its reoccurrence to spit the object out onto his hand. Unconsciously, Sakura moved closer, eyes fixated on the small shape in the likeness of a bird that rested on his outstretched palm. It was clay, she realised. A small, beautifully crafted clay bird.

"It's beautiful," she complimented in spite of herself, a smile unbidden played across her lips.

"Just remember what I said, yeah," Deidara cautioned and placed the still-warm sculpture into her unwary palm. It was only as she turned it over reluctantly in her palm that the reality of the situation hit her with all the force of a battering ram. Her anger, only kept at bay by the curiosity that had dominated her thoughts for those few crucial seconds flooded back in full force. She raised her head furiously, torn between giving the bird back and smashing it against his thick skull only to discover that he had vanished.

The girl exhaled noisily – a clear sign of deep irritation. She suppressed her natural instinct to clench her fists having learnt from experience that most objects she held shattered when subjected to such extreme pressure before she remembered that it was only Deidara's clay bird. She wavered between two equally appealing choices; crushing the bird to dust or dropping it in the fast flowing stream and watching it as the water's course buffeted it against a myriad of obstacles including stones and dead branches. She did neither of these things however and for reasons unknown to her; she set it alongside her medical kit and kunai in the small pouch belted to her waist, ignoring the nagging voice that cautioned the wisdom of accepting objects from strange shinobi.

Her scrutinising gaze surveyed the small patch of trees where Deidara had appeared with a hint of scepticism. He appeared to have left but Sakura wasn't as arrogant as to presume that she was the better shinobi. She sighed. What was the matter with her? When had she transformed from a dutiful shinobi of Konoha to one that accepted strange clay birds and considered freeing a wanted criminal from a neighbouring village? And the worst part was that she had wanted to believe him, had wanted it to be all a misunderstanding. If he'd lied, she would have believed him.

She ignored the numbing, pricking sensation that spread up her legs as the night deepened around her statuesque form. The chill night air clung to her arms and the nape of her neck like a little lost child. She shivered, feeling goosebumps form on her exposed skin and turned away. She had already stayed far too long.

Halfway to the camp she froze, remembering two fatal words. Deidara had definitely said someone was coming but she'd seen no sign of them. The knowledge sent cold dread running up her spine as she evaluated the possibilities. It was possible he had lied of course but to what purpose? For the life of her, she couldn't think of any reason why he would. That left the other, more disturbing possibility. Ice flooded her veins and she trembled at the very thought. She hadn't sensed anyone in the area but she knew there were many much more skilled shinobi out there who were perfectly capable of concealing their chakra from her. If someone had seen!

She took deep, calming gulps of air in order to regulate her panicked system and instead forced herself to take a logical stance on the matter. She was getting worked up over nothing, she assured herself. She had no proof that someone had seen her and to leave the camp would only arouse suspicion. Even if someone _had_ seen her, there was no guarantee that they had seen or heard any of her conversation with Deidara.

However, to be on the safe side, she resolved to keep a closer watch on the camp from now on. She only hoped she'd made the right decision.

* * *

Sakura awoke the next morning to stiff and aching bones. The effort of peeling away layers of blankets required a conscious effort and so the kunoichi made no attempt to work her muscles, content to remain motionless like a marionette whose strings had been cut. Her eyes traced the brown canvas roof of her tent through which she could pinpoint the exact position of the sun as it filtered through the gaps in the woven material before realising what it was she was staring at. She only required a few more moments to remember why she felt so angry and confused. Suddenly the prospect of rising from her warm, inviting blankets seemed much more daunting.

A passing cloud blotted out the sun momentarily, causing the interior of the tent to darken substantially and objects took on a grainy, surreal quality. Sakura sighed. The weather mimicked her melancholic thoughts perfectly. However, even the current climate could not detract from the fact that as much as she'd have liked to hide out in her tent all day, it would be practically impossible and besides, the air was becoming rather stuffy which dampened the attractiveness of the plan. After several minutes of fumbling around for her clothes Sakura exited her tent sleepily, painfully aware of every ache and bruise she'd acquired from a sleepless night of tossing the blankets this way and that, determined to bully her mind into submission before eventually passing out just as the sun had begun to peek over the horizon.

The majority of the encampment comprised of a motley collection of brown canvas tents in tight-knit circles however Sakura only had eyes for the colossal tangerine tent – more like a marquee than anything – she must have missed under the cover of darkness. It dominated the camp, like a cathedral in amongst small ramshackle houses. Sakura had no doubts about who owned that particular tent.

As the medic cut across the camp in search of water, she noticed a pair of sentinels posted its entrance. Instinctively she gave them a wide berth despite her constant reassurances that if news of the impromptu meeting last night had reached their ears, she would have heard about it by now.

The familiar bubbling laughter of water dancing over stones and swirling in little eddies greeted her ears as she approached the fast-flowing brook. A sudden outburst of laughter alerted her to the presence of a number of shinobi occupying its sandy banks. She grimaced and wandered over to a quieter part of the river where she was content to watch the light catch upon the surface, fragmenting into a thousand reflections which shimmered like diamonds across the silent body of water. It was calming and peaceful away from everyone else; Sakura found that breathing came easily in this quiet, secluded place and she began to think more rationally. She stared out across the water, dipping her fingers into the swirl of liquid lazily, feeling its cool, gentle touch on her skin.

Half an hour later, she trekked back across the campsite cradling a heavy saucepan laden with water when she heard a sudden shout.

"Sakura!" Her head darted up and she stumbled backwards in surprise, slopping a substantial amount of water down her front. She breathed a sigh of relief and attempted to calm her racing heart when her eyes took in the familiar ecstatic smile and open, honest eyes of her teammate; Naruto.

"I've got some water," she gestured to the pail, only managing to muster a half-hearted smile while ignoring his barely controlled sniggers. A sudden idea struck her and she suppressed a grin. "You can carry it back, if you like". Her eyes glinted with mirth.

Swiftly, she tossed the metal bucket at the unsuspecting shinobi, watching with some satisfaction as it sailed through his outstretched hands and hit him hard in the chest. The impact caused a torrent of water to slosh over the rim of the bucket, creating a dark patch of water which spread rapidly across his orange t-shirt; matching Sakura's equally soaking top. Both of them stared at the empty bucket in Naruto's hands. Sakura eyed her handiwork smugly. Now they were even.

Unfortunately Naruto seemed to be thinking along the same lines because he darted back to the river, clutching the bucket like a life-line. A broad smirk written all over his features.

A second later and Sakura realised what he was planning.

"Hey, wait! Come back!" She called, half-frantic, half-laughing as she sped towards the brook, hot on the heels of her teammate. She reached him about the same time that he slowed down, her sandals flooding with water as they splashed through the crystal clear shallows. Her outstretched fingers were a mere hairsbreadth from her quarry when he spun around, drenching her with the newly filled bucket of water. She spluttered, blinking wet hair out of her eyes and met his anticipatory gaze with a wry grin.

"Oh now you're going to get it," she splashed flecks of water at the laughing boy who waded out of range, dipping the bucket into the river's cool depths for a second assault.

Sakura didn't wait for it to come. She ran through the water, momentarily freeing large droplets of liquid from its collective body. She caught the handle as it rose up to greet her and the metal buckled under the force of her grip. She grinned, putting all her weight behind wresting the metal container away from Naruto. A loud snap sent her reeling backwards with a splash as the pressure vanished. She glanced down at her still-curled fist to see that handle within her grasp had separated cleanly from the bucket. Unfazed, she stood up, regaining her footing on the river bed as little rivulets of water cascaded down her. Naruto stood several feet away grinning. She couldn't help herself. She grinned back, full of determination to win back the bucket.

Half an hour later, Kakashi extracted an extremely dented, abused piece of twisted metal from his two sopping wet students who were both trying and failing not to look pleased with themselves."Remind me never to send either of you out for water again," he reprimanded, shaking his head but his lips quirked into an unseen smile and his eyes glinted.

The rest of the morning and much of the afternoon followed without much incident. Sakura likened the hustle and bustle of the camp to an ant hill; patrols of shinobi constantly departed and arrived back at the site but from their expressions she was able to deduce that nothing major had occurred. Surprisingly the water fight had been refreshing and exactly what she'd needed. It had never occurred to her how badly she had needed some time out of her hectic schedule – time to breathe, relax and a respite from the chaos that had ensued over the past few days.

It was only when sorting through her tent for some supplies that her hands clasped around an unfamiliar object and she drew it out from a small leather pouch, hidden under a bundle of clothes she'd stuffed roughly in the corner. It was the miniature clay bird. She sat back on her knees with a sigh and examined it closely in the palm of her hand, having not had the opportunity or desire to do so before. It was rather unremarkable, she realised as she turned it over, scrutinising it carefully. It did not appear to be dangerous or to have any function that she could detect, although there was an unusual amount of residual chakra left over from its making. She sighed and returned it to its pouch.

It irked her that Deidara would have the gall to leave her something so small and inconsequential but at the same time potentially problematic. She wondered why he had wanted her to have it so badly. She ground her teeth angrily, wondering why she cared. At the time he had appeared nonchalant but looking back, she knew he had been anything but. She bristled at his incorrect assumption about her; that she would willingly accept whatever he gave her despite the barrier that lay between them. She had no intention of keeping the bird and – she thought with fresh determination – she would make sure he knew! Feeling better for her decision, she straightened up and exited the tent with one destination in mind: the secluded glade where they had met the night before.

The clearing was deserted.

The pink-haired kunoichi settled down on a large flattish white rock by the banks of the stream, attempting to hold back a wave of bitter disappointment. It was stupid, but she had been positive, beyond a doubt that he'd be there. She regretted ever coming, unconsciously clenching her fists out of frustration and self-loathing. She should have informed the Sand of her encounter – leaving out the specifics of course – instead of accepting a potentially dangerous gift and returning to the scene, hoping he'd come back! So why had she?

Sakura found that was a question she didn't really want to answer.

There was no point in staying any longer, she thought dolefully. Deidara had not reappeared – although that was probably a good thing – and she had made the wrong choice in returning. She supposed she should be thankful nothing worse had happened. As was her custom, the medic gave a cursory glance about the clearing and made to leave. She was halfway across the clearing when a deep, velvety voice cut across the silence, freezing her in mid-stride.

"Looking for someone?"

Sakura spun around in shock, fear clutching at her throat as she turned to face the very man she'd been waiting for. In spite of her fear, the kunoichi couldn't help but notice how reminiscent of the night before the scene was. She surveyed him angrily, eyes tracing his figure and reading the wariness in his face. He appeared to have lost some of his cocky attitude. His face was unusually pale, accentuating the dark circles under his eyes.

"What do you want?" She asked abruptly, disapproval of his words seeping into her tone.

"Isn't that what I should be asking you?" Deidara replied with less zeal than before. Years of practice drew her attention to the subtle way that he transferred most of his weight to his left foot. His wounds were still affecting him, she calculated, not wholly surprised.

"I came to give you this back," the kunoichi answered resolutely. She chided herself for being distracted so easily. If he was suffering from an injury that was his business, she reassured herself, quashing the urge to heal his wounds. He was no longer her patient. She would do well to remember that.

"Is that really the reason you're here, Sakura?" Deidara replied, his keen gaze cutting through her own and rendering her speechless. It was all she could to gape at him unattractively as she pondered the meaning of his words. What _was_ the reason? No, she could not afford to be side-tracked. One mistake was all it took. She had to remain focused!

"I don't know what you mean," Sakura countered airily. "I only came to give you this back. I have no ulterior motive, though I can't really say the same for you". She paused, letting the words sink in. "I've been here for less than ten minutes and you show up, out of the blue. Tell me, were you waiting for me to return or is your camp conveniently close by? Somehow I doubt it's the latter".

"You shouldn't be here," Deidara announced, his expression turning from one of mirth to cold and something Sakura couldn't quite distinguish. Inwardly she groaned at his denseness. You'd have thought I'd got it the first time, she thought heavily, her thoughts laced with irony.

"You keep saying that, but you don't seem to want to tell me why. Why then should I believe you?"

"I can't tell you that". His expression became shuttered, like that of an empty house with boarded up windows.

"Well then I guess we have a problem," Sakura sighed, wishing inwardly that everything could be simple and straight-cut. She wished that Deidara would be straight with her, she wished that this conversation had never occurred and she wished that her heart would not beat out a violent tattoo against her ribs at the mere sight of him.

Deidara said nothing. It seemed he had run out of things to say. In truth, he was running over a myriad of things to say, each less likely than the last. He couldn't bear to tell her the truth, but if she stayed she would die and Deidara could not stand to have that on his conscience.

"Take it," Sakura startled him out of his thoughts in time for him to see her proffer the little clay bird of his own making. He glanced at it briefly.

"No," he shook his head. "It's yours".

"Just take it, Deidara".

He glared at her, fists tightening in unmistakable anger as his short temper frayed. "Why do you have to make everything so difficult, yeah?"

Sakura huffed and crossed her arms out of sheer irritation, willing herself not to rise to his bait. He watched her with blazing eyes, almost willing her to fight back, to release some of that fiery spirit which had drawn her to him in the first place. He hated seeing that lost, helpless expression she'd worn upon her face moments before he'd chosen to reveal himself, knowing that he was likely one of the main causes of that. She had closed herself off to him. He had lost her trust and that made him angry. Angry because he knew he had only himself to blame.

"You won't even give me a chance to explain!" He fumed, as he paced up and down, beside himself with rage. "And anything I would say, you'd disregard because you don't even trust me to tell the truth!"

"Of course I don't!" Sakura countered. "You are an enemy of Konoha, therefore we are enemies by default. That's what you said wasn't it?"

"Sakura-" Deidara protested.

"No Deidara. I'm sick of hearing your lies," she choked out, turning her back so that he couldn't see her expression.

An audible crunch shattered the silence of the glade as she reflexively folded her fingers into a fist, grinding the shell of the clay bird into dust. Surprised, she let the fragments slip from her fingers and become lost in amongst a forest of green blades. She strode away, half expecting him to stop her, to feel his hand grasp her wrist or to hear him call her name but she was disappointed. She reached the edge of the clearing unhindered, not daring to look back.

A little while later Deidara left the clearing.

* * *

"So did you persuade her?" The red-head asked dryly, pausing half-way through cleaning and modifying his man-sized puppet, Hiroku. To his distaste, grains of sand had wedged themselves inside the contraption, clogging up the wooden joints. Sasori scowled. It was a large job, made no less easy by the number of components and joints that made it up. In short, it was absolute murder to clean. Certainly, it was not a task he'd ever dream of delegating to anyone other than himself as fixing the puppet took time, steady fingers and a degree of trust.

The puppet-master so fixated upon his task, barely raised his head when Deidara came storming back into camp with a face like thunder, nor did he stir when the blonde kicked an empty tin that happened to be in his path. Emotions were so... troublesome, he observed stoically.

"No," Deidara's heavily laden tone of voice left no room for explanation. He settled down onto a large piece of fallen debris nearby whose splayed branches groped skywards mournfully and ignored the constant snap and crackle of the fire, preferring to mull over the events of several hours earlier. The light reflecting off the dancing flames were mirrored in his wide, unseeing eyes. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he dimly registered the weight of Sasori's impassive grey eyes watching him silently from across the camp fire. A scowl unbidden, leapt to his face.

"It was foolish," the puppet-master stated coldly. His voice was unconcerned and disinterested, bordering on apathetic. "You could have been seen". When those words were greeted with silence, he added without inflection, "how's your leg?"

"I'll live," Deidara snarled, ripping back his trousers to reveal heavily bloodstained bandages which he tore off with unwonted abandon, ignoring the stabbing pains which ricocheted up the entire length of his leg.

"Well I won't hold my breath," Sasori said sardonically, not bothering to lift his head this time.

"I wish you would," Deidara said sourly, deliberately keeping his voice raised. Only a faint narrowing of his companion's eyes told Deidara that he had heard.

With a sigh, the blonde leaned forward to observe the wound under the fierce, orange flickering light of the flames and grimaced. The blood had congealed, preventing further blood loss but it was healing much too slow for his liking. Any heavy exercise would force the wound open again, he concluded wearily. Unfortunately, fighting fell under that category and it was inevitable that fighting would occur in the next few days. Trying not to think about that too much, he proceeded to clean the wound with a cloth soaked in water from a pan sizzling over the fire, wincing occasionally. Once he was satisfied, he retrieved a roll of sterilised bandages from his pack in the tent behind him and bound his leg with little skill. After much cursing and several long minutes of unravelling and reapplying the bandages he decided it would do.

Reluctantly, he had to admit that the exchange between himself and the pink-haired medic had not at all gone to plan. It had been with some surprise that he'd sensed her chakra in the vicinity as – based on their previous meeting – he had assumed that she had wanted nothing more to do with him. He wasn't far wrong. He toyed with the idea of seeking her out one last time, to make her _listen_ to what he had to say, to make her _understand_ why he had acted the way he did. He sighed and shook his head. Tempting as it was, Deidara knew it would be a mistake to return.

That left one option.

"I'm not doing it, yeah". His point-blank refusal barely carried above the merrily crackling flames but its meaning was by no means diminished. The puppet-master sighed and an understanding passed between them as his eyes met the gaze of the determined explosives expert.

"Can't or won't?" From under a crop of dark burgundy hair, Sasori scrutinised the blonde.

Deidara let out a low growl and tightened his fists. "What does it matter? There are other ways to achieve our goal!"

We've been through this," Sasori replied in extremely irked tones, more because of the interruption than anything else. "It's the best plan by far and will ensure that we capture both of the jinchuuriki".

"But Sakura-"

"She made her choice, as did you when you joined the Akatsuki," Sasori reminded him evenly; tone completely devoid of empathy and mind already returning to the task at hand which was – in his opinion – much more interesting than the troubles of others.

"You know full well I had no choice," Deidara grumbled, eyes flashing at the mere mention of that day.

"And I say you've taken a ridiculous view from the beginning," Sasori reprimanded. "It's not like you had anything to go back to".

"That's not the point," Deidara returned bitingly, involuntarily clenching his teeth at the unpleasant turn of conversation. Sasori's gaze hardened. Deidara's lack of cooperation irked him to no end and so he returned to polishing his puppet with renewed vigour. "I don't see you risking your neck for this damn mission, Sasori!"

Sasori set down his rag and sighed. He knew from past experience that Deidara was as stubborn and immovable as an old mule. It would be almost impossible to convince him to change his mind. "Alright but you'd better have a good alternative, Deidara".

"Sasori-".

"Don't misunderstand me," Sasori cut across his partner sharply, his ears already weary from conversation. "This is not something I want to do. But as much as it pains me to say it, the mission won't work without you. There is no other choice but to abandon the plan".

"Don't say anything to the others, yeah," Deidara replied, relieved that the puppet-master had agreed to forsake the plan. "I don't want any of this getting out".

"No I suppose you don't," Sasori smirked. He seemed to contemplate this for a moment. "Fine, but when the time comes I shall ask a favour of you Deidara".

After a moment's pause, Deidara reluctantly agreed.

* * *

"Where were you?" Naruto blurted out upon meeting a weary and dishevelled Sakura halfway across the darkened camp. The sun had set only minutes before but already she could feel a chill breeze creep down the nape of her neck. The dry bracken crunched under their feet as they wended their way through the sea of tents towards the eastern edge of the camp. After several moments of silence – filled only with the swish and crack of dry branches – Sakura shrugged.

He continued to stare at her expectantly so she fobbed him off with as vague an answer as she could muster: "Out for a walk" and kept her eyes fixed on the horizon which still glowed faintly as the last remnants of sunlight slipped away. In her mind's eye, she was reliving the conversation with Deidara. She remembered his hard, blazing look, of the fury that had contorted his face when she'd dared to offer him the clay bird back. She shivered. Of one thing Deidara had been adamant. That it was dangerous for her to stay. She pondered the potential meaning of those words apprehensively, sensing that – due to the sensitive nature of the topic – it could be likened to poking a sleeping lion in the eye or pulling out a very sharp thorn.

She sighed. Could it mean that he still harboured feelings for her? A swooping, hopeful emotion soared briefly in her chest before she quashed it instinctively. No. He would never have done those things if he'd cared, she chided herself sharply. She would do better to forget those long days in the hospital under the burning sun. Those days were gone.

"I'm off to find Kakashi," Naruto announced as they neared their destination. "See you later, Sakura," he walked off with a confident wave of his hand. When he was gone Sakura let out the breath she'd been unconsciously holding. She wondered for how much longer her mysterious behaviour would go unnoticed. She could feel the charade she had hastily erected cracking at the seams. When it broke, she feared what lay underneath would be laid bare, for all to see.

She paused at the break in between their little ring of tents, unsure whether to step out of the shadows and into the warm, bright firelight. She could distinguish three distinct, huddled shapes bunched around the small campfire at the heart of their circle of tents and as she neared, she was able to identify them as members of Team 10: Neji, Ten Ten and Gai. They would notice her sooner or later, she realised and so she took a deep breath and relinquished the safety of the shadows. Almost immediately, her quick gaze perceived that all of the logs were occupied by at least one person and so – wincing inwardly – Sakura sat down next to Gai, feeling numb.

"Are you alright Sakura?" Gai startled her out of her reverie. "You look a bit down," he continued, a little too astutely for her liking. She contemplated answering but then realised she really had nothing to say. Gai stared at her for a second and then brightened visibly. "I know exactly what you need; one of my famous pick-me-ups!" Sakura stared at him incredulously as he excused himself, presumably to make said pick-me up.

"I'm sorry," Ten Ten apologised once he was out of range, her smile altogether too understanding. "He can get a bit much sometimes".

"No it's alright," Sakura managed to smile faintly. "How do you put up with him all the time?"

"Them you mean?" Neji intoned suddenly, gesturing to the two Konoha shinobi sporting green spandex outfits. "I have no idea".

Sakura giggled, unable to help herself. Their joking, easy tones calmed her mind, putting her strangely at ease. For the first time since she'd returned to the camp, her heart felt unburdened by the worries that had plagued her since before leaving Suna.

Feeling marginally better, she shifted into a more comfortable position on the mossy log, uncoiling her tightly wound shoulder muscles as she relaxed her guard.

She chose to listen to Ten Ten and Neji's amiable chatter rather than join in, enjoying the short liberation from her poisonous thoughts. Somehow, the whole situation seemed more bearable with people she knew surrounding her. She was comforted in knowing that Kakashi-sensei and Naruto would support her at the very least.

At that moment, Gai chose to make his reappearance, entering the circle of firelight holding a tin mug of something that had a strangely aromatic scent. Sakura took the mug with a smile of thanks and sniffed it gingerly, the heat from the liquid warming her chilled fingers. She deduced that it was a herbal tea of some kind, although she couldn't identify the ingredients by scent alone.

"What's in it?" She asked him, eying the concoction suspiciously.

"Ah, now that's a secret!" He said with a grin, wagging his finger at her knowingly. "If I told you then soon everyone would be stealing my uber-cool herbal drink!"

"Right," she replied, privately thinking that she'd rather pass judgement once she'd tasted the so-called uber-cool drink. She hesitantly brought the tin mug to her lips and took a tentative sip, taking care not to burn her tongue from the scalding hot liquid. A sweet, floral flavour pervaded her senses; it put her in mind of woodlands and sweet pastures. She was surprised to discover that she liked it. The medic took a second sip, savouring the flavour this time. She could detect camomile and a hint of lemongrass along with some other ingredient she failed to identify.

"This is really goo-," she exclaimed, turning round to compliment Gai on his brilliant tea-brewing skills but for once he wasn't listening. None of them were.

Sakura followed their line of sight, seeing what had caught their attention almost immediately. The entire camp had been roused like a hive of angry bees. Shinobi were abandoning half-finished meals at firesides, others were shouting orders as they ran across the packed site and many more were converging upon the patch of cleared ground in front of the Kazekage's tent. It was not long before Sakura and the others joined the rear of the expanding throng. The air was rife with alarm and confusion. An uneasy feeling settled at the bottom of her stomach as she caught echoes of the infectious emotions which rippled through the anxious crowd. She chanced a glance at the others but their eyes never strayed from the head of the crowd as a silent authoritative figure made his appearance. Sakura watched him too.

The man raised his hand and the murmurs subsided.

"The sentinels guarding the Kazekage's tent have just given me some very disturbing news," he informed the waiting crowd, many of whom had already begun whispering half-formed theories to their neighbours. "Up until moments ago, they had been unaware that the Kazekage has been missing for over an hour! It appears that he and his personal guard vanished right after dinner; apparently he was intending to take a walk to stretch his legs and never returned".

The buzzing increased in volume until it reached a crescendo. "Vanished? What does he mean vanished?" Sakura whispered to a startled Neji, taking advantage of the confusion that ensued. "Do you think that the Akatsuki-"

But Neji hushed her to be silent.

"I want everyone to remain calm," the speaker shouted, struggling to make himself heard over the hubbub of noise. Gradually the shouts of outrage and mutinous muttering subsided and Sakura was able to hear what he was saying. "Meet back here in five minutes where you will all be sorted into teams. If you find the Kazekage send up a green flare, if you find the Akatsuki send up a red flare," he instructed. "Well? What are you all waiting for?"

Under his stern glare, the astonished shinobi hurried back to their tents, quite unable to believe what was happening.

* * *

**Please review and don't forget to check out the rewritten versions of chapters 2 and 3!**


	12. Hide and Seek

**A/N:** Sorry for the really long wait guys! Thought i owed it to you to update although i had a real writers block on this one. Finally its done! I hope people still read this. It's been almost a year... Anyway! Enjoy!

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Naruto

* * *

**Consequences**

**Chapter 12: Hide and Seek**

* * *

"I've found another one," Sakura spoke wearily into a small, discreet microphone reserved for reconnaissance missions. Her rough, ragged tones betrayed the weariness in her voice and the tiny tremors that ran in waves down her fatigued limbs only served to enforce that fact. Dark, wafer-thin leaves clung to her hair like glue and her clothes were smeared with dirt after a hard day of tracking false trails though the undergrowth. In short, she was shattered.

Well, it was to be expected, she thought resignedly as she smoothed back the dry bed of leaves coating her unwelcome discovery. She ignored the uncomfortable thudding in her ears as her heart raced and she was gripped by the now familiar nausea which she endured each time the trail ran cold.

She jumped, touching a blood-stained, icy hand as the microphone crackled to life.

"Stay there," replied the calm, smooth voice of her team leader, though not without sympathy. "We'll come to you".

She nodded her head silently before realising he couldn't see her.

"Okay".

She sat back in the long grass and gazed around the secluded clearing contemplatively. It would be several minutes before the rest of the team reached her spot so she had ample time to sit back and relax her aching bones. Unfortunately, time alone with her tumultuous thoughts would probably inflict more harm than good so within seconds she was on her feet again, racking her brains for something, anything to distract her from her thoughts. After a minute of pacing, her eyes alighted on the corpse and she sighed, settling down next to it once more. She might as well make herself useful by ascertaining the cause of death, she thought wearily, for the moment forgetting that it was her job as the only medic on the team.

As she examined the man, her eyes were inadvertently drawn to his muddied face, matted hair, his permanently surprised expression. Vaguely, she wondered what kind of man he'd been; if he'd been the kind to crack jokes, a committed shinobi, if he'd had a wife and children.

A small sigh of relief escaped her cracked lips as she finished her examination. Poison. The cause of death had been poison. A moment later she felt guilty. Just because it had not been Deidara who had killed this man, it did not make his death any less horrible. She had no right to be relieved that the blonde hadn't a hand in the heinous act when it had been his associate that committed it. A fresh wave of pain, mixed in with several intangible emotions washed over her and she groaned emphatically.

Deidara. They were completely and irrevocably on different sides of the chessboard now and Sakura could think of no way for him to reconcile with her. In fact, she was beginning to understand that she might not want him to. She barely knew the man, she reasoned with herself. Might it not be better to forget that the whole thing happened and view Deidara as the threat that he was? He was her enemy now. She tasted the bitter word on her tongue curiously, disliking the strange feel. It seemed wrong somehow.

Still, she couldn't shake the feeling that she was waiting for him to change his mind, to say that it had all been a misunderstanding, for none of this ever to have happened. But it had. He couldn't change the things he had done and she couldn't forget them, as much as she wished to.

"Where is he?" A deep voice jerked her from her musings and she turned to see that the rest of the team had arrived.

"Over there," she said, pointing to the knot of bushes vaguely as she answered her team leader: a dark-skinned man by the name of Haru. He sent her a curt nod and strode off to examine the corpse first-hand, along with two other unknown shinobi. Reluctantly Sakura followed, keen to keep her distance from the body as its pungent smell travelled a fair distance in the sweltering heat.

"That's the third one today," the left-hand shinobi muttered to his partner quietly upon observing the body.

"No, Aiko's group discovered one about an hour ago," the second shinobi corrected his friend softly. "They-"

The pink-haired medic lost interest, tuning out their mediocre conversation almost instantly. What did it matter, if they came no closer to finding Gaara? They hit dead ends everywhere and not even Kakashi's ninken were able to pick up even a whiff of his scent. Unconsciously Sakura nursed a growing fear that next time there would be a red-haired shinobi lying lifeless among the trees. His auburn hair tangled with twigs and leaves, his blank empty eyes facing skyward.

Abruptly her ominous train of thought was cut short when she realised, to her chagrin, that the three shinobi were watching her expectantly.

"The cause of death," Haru repeated impatiently. "What was the cause of death?"

"Poison," she supplied dully but they were already turning away. Their faces resembled those of men carrying out a tedious job because they must rather than those of a rescue mission. Obviously, they expected not to find their Kazekage. Alive anyway.

* * *

The soft sloshing of a questionable piece of meat as it slipped from her fork brought the unresponsive medic to her senses. It was nightfall and the shinobi had made camp in the shelter of a bowel of trees, savouring their evening meal under the starry sky. Well perhaps savour wasn't the right word, Sakura thought as her jade eyes cast around the campsite watching her fellow ninja pick at through their stew with similar morose expressions. Based on the fact that the food's reception was less than pleasurable, one could surmise that the meal was anything but satisfactory. Though, she thought with savage irritation as she stabbed the elusive, rubbery chunk of meat, anyone could have guessed that by appearance alone.

Her insides churning, she pushed the culinary failure aside. A substantial amount slopped over the log she was sitting on but rather than lament the loss of her stew she felt a sense of relief.

"Oh, come on. It's not that bad," said Naruto bracingly as he shovelled a loaded forkful into his mouth with an unconvincing look of satisfaction. Upon swallowing it, he patted his stomach with an attempted grin. "See, it's nice," he continued, ignoring the way his belly gurgled in protest. "Very tasty".

"Good, you can have mine then," Sakura answered swiftly, pushing the remainder of her stew towards the blonde-haired boy before stalking away. Naruto's face fell.

"Wait," he called after her, abandoning his meal a little too eagerly in his haste to catch up with her. "What's the matter with you? You've been really off ever since we left Suna".

Upon hearing those words, the pink-haired medic halted her progress across the glade, a look of dread marring her smooth features. This was what she'd been afraid of. What surprised her most was that it came from Naruto of all people. He was not the most observant person she'd ever met and so for him to express concern over her behaviour meant that it must have been glaringly obvious to everyone else.

"I don't know what you mean," she said stiffly, eyes staring off into the distance.

"Yes, you do," Naruto insisted for once ploughing on determinedly, perhaps taking reassurance in his theory from the way her face had gone very pale. "You won't even look at me!"

Sakura swallowed but remained silent, resolutely gazing at the trunk of a tree not ten feet away.

"Is it Kankuro?" The blonde continued, oblivious to the way she winced upon hearing that name. "Or that Akatsuki guy, the one you had to heal," he paused for a second, clearly thinking hard. "Dendei, wasn't it?"

"Deidara," Sakura corrected without any inflection. It unnerved her how close to the truth he was getting so she decided to steer the conversation out of dangerous waters. "Look, it doesn't matter. Can't we just forget about it?"

Naruto eyed her appraisingly for a moment before slowly shaking his head.

"Look, if you don't want to talk about it with me at least talk to someone else," Naruto said exasperatedly.

"Like who?" she asked dully. "Who else could understand what I'm going through right now? Kakashi? Lee? Ten Ten?" She shook her head. "Somehow I don't think so".

"Well if you explained what was going on, maybe we would," he insisted, ignoring her obvious reluctance to pursue the topic. "We're your friends Sakura".

The scathing remark that she'd been ready to unleash just a moment before balanced precariously on the tip of her tongue.

_We're your friends._

Loathe though she was to admit it, Naruto was right. To take out her anger and frustration on him would serve only to promote ill feelings between them. Was she, Sakura willing to jeopardise her relationship with her old teammate for the sake of a man whose betrayal she should only have expected? It was her own selfish emotions that had got her into this mess and her indomitable pride which refused to involve anyone else in the matter. And in light of the severity of the situation she was disinclined to confess what had actually occurred in the healing sessions.

"I appreciate what you're trying to say, but this is something I have to figure out on my own". Her tone left no room for argument.

"But-"

"Naruto, stop," she pleaded, haunting green eyes shimmering in the incandescent moonlight. "Please, just stop".

To her surprise, he obeyed. His unwavering blue eyes locked with hers; the disappointment within them was almost palpable. Sakura felt like she should say something but her mouth was inexplicably dry. She licked her lips in a fruitless attempt to bring some moisture to them but judging by the expression on his face, she'd taken too long to answer.

"Fine," he replied, turning on his heel to stroll back to camp.

The temperature dropped several degrees.

* * *

"Deidara?"

The words were tentative and unsure as though the speaker hadn't fully committed herself to them. Hesitant jade eyes cast uncertainly about the clearing as though expecting a dark-cloaked figure to stride casually between the gnarled trees. Teeth chewed involuntarily on pale cerise lips while two small hands bunched defensively into fists.

"Deidara?" she called a little stronger this time.

He had never failed to appear in the glade she'd unconsciously dubbed as "theirs" before. But she had to remind herself that was before she as good as told him that under no certain terms was he ever to contact her again. He was so stubborn that it never occurred to her he'd listen.

"Deidara!"

She was angry now. A small flock of birds erupted from the tree they'd been roosting in but aside from that there was no other sound. Gradually a sense of foolishness washed over the young medic as the blonde-haired man failed to make his entrance.

Desperation: that was what had led her here. Out of a tangible fear for the Kazekage she had forsaken her pride in a moment of weakness, hoping that the elusive Akatsuki would reveal himself simply because she wished it. She wondered what she had hoped to accomplish by such a meeting. Who was she fooling? Deidara would never have caved to her demands, of that she was certain. She sighed.

"A rather odd choice for a meeting place, don't you think?"

Heart fluttering like a hummingbird, Sakura pivoted on the spot with a chakra-laden fist, searching for the unexpected, distinctly feminine voice. It sounded like...

"Relax child, if I was an enemy I wouldn't have stopped for a quick chat," Chiyo said genially, a small smile touching upon her wizened features. She strode slowly across the clearing, bright black eyes scrutinising the medic closely. Sakura loosened her fist slightly, all manner of suspicions running through her mind which was on hyper-alert. Chiyo might be an old woman but if there was one thing the medic had learnt over the years it was never to judge by appearance. "You were calling someone just now. I heard you".

Sakura opened her mouth to deny the accusation then closed it again. It appeared the old woman had heard the whole thing. To lie would be pointless.

"I was," she answered helplessly. A sudden vulnerability swept over her. Here was a woman who could expose her, if she chose to.

"Please!" She blurted before Chiyo had the chance to speak. "Please, don't tell anyone! I'll-"

"Sakura," The elderly woman raised a wrinkled hand. "I have no intention of telling anyone else about this evening. Please sit down".

This was so unexpected that it was all she could do to gape unattractively at her before complying with her request. Seconds later the elderly woman joined her on a sunken mossy log. Sakura became suddenly very interested in her knees, ignoring the curious mixture of shame and fear that coursed through her.

"I sensed there was more to the story than what you told me that night on the hilltop," Chiyo began slowly. "At first I thought I'd imagined it. It wouldn't be the first time. Then I saw you sneak off after your confrontation with that loud-mouthed blonde. Curiosity got the better of me," she shrugged. "Would you like to talk about it?"

"Not really, no".

"That's good," said Chiyo, sounding pleased. "You should never reveal your weaknesses to others. Even your allies".

"Why?" Sakura spoke to the ground. "Why won't you tell anyone? You have every reason to report my doings if you believe that I'm..." she searched for the right word, "fraternising with the enemy".

"You are right of course," she replied as Sakura's stomach took a sharp plummet. "It would be the right thing to do. However, that would make me little better than a hypocrite and I despise hypocrisy in all forms".

"Er-," she said, so surprised that she was unable to articulate a response. "So... as long as turning me in would make you a hypocrite, this stays between us?" Her mind fumbled over the awkward choice of words as she struggled to comprehend the confusing situation.

"Quite," Chiyo smiled, apparently enjoying the perplexing exchange.

"Can I ask why it would make you a hypocrite?"

"You already know the answer to that," the aged kunoichi replied with a somewhat cheerful grin.

"I do?"

Chiyo let out a sigh of feigned exasperation. "Come on child, it's not that difficult. You asked me about it last time we spoke".

"Your grandson," Sakura supplied, wondering why she hadn't made the connection before.

"Precisely," she closed her eyes, a rather pained expression on her face. Sakura waited patiently, having received the impression she was remembering events of many years ago. Eventually, the elderly woman spoke.

"He was more like a son than a grandson," she explained heavily. "His parents died when he was very young and so I took it upon myself to take care of him. He was an unusual child. He never played with the other kids but I believe that was because he was rather jealous of them". She paused. "At that age, Sasori was obsessed with having parents to love him, the way he saw with other children. I thought it was unhealthy so I began to teach him the art of puppetry to distract him from his fixation. But I'm afraid I intervened too late".

"What happened?" Sakura asked softly, leaning forward in spite of herself.

"I remember how proud he was when he completed his first puppets. I would have perhaps shared his enthusiasm if it weren't for the fact that they resembled his parents". Sakura took a sharp intake of breath. "I tried to encourage him to get involved in other activities but he wouldn't hear any of it and in time, he came to realise that the puppet parents could never replace his real ones".

"From thereon, he started down a slippery slope. His fascination with puppets grew and I believe that in time he began to hate the village. He viewed it as their fault that his parents died, you see. Anyway, eventually he left the village and I haven't seen him since. I have no idea what he's been doing for the last twenty years but somewhere along the line he joined the Akatsuki. As I am the only one who is familiar with his techniques I offered to come along..."

She trailed off, dark eyes reflecting the starry heavens above.

"I'm sorry," Sakura offered, realising how meaningless and trite her apology must sound.

The old woman never stirred. Sakura wondered if she'd even heard her. Minutes passed in silence and long after the medic's feet were beginning to protest from the cold, Chiyo spoke.

"This Deidara, do you trust him?"

Good question, Sakura thought silently. Her initial answer was no, completely and irrevocably no. However, something about that answer made her feel ill at ease. She let out a long, slow sigh as her eyes slowly drank in the quiet clearing contemplatively. Try as she might, she could not completely eradicate the sense that something almost alive had been created in the time they'd spent together. Invisible strings tied her to him in a way she couldn't quite understand. It was a sensation quite unlike any she'd ever experienced before and then it hit her: distrusting him simply wasn't an option.

"Yes," she replied torn between a strange mixture of fear and excitement at uttering the verbal confirmation. "Yes I do".

"Well I hope you're right," Chiyo straightened up from her position on the log with a grim smile. "For both our sakes".

The medic simply stared at her, anxiety wavering in her jade green eyes as she assessed the elderly woman. The lines which defined her prominent features appeared deeper if possible and there was a certain weariness to every movement. An emotion which Sakura recognised but couldn't put a name to shimmered in the depths of her eyes. After what felt like minutes but could only have been a couple of seconds, the burning question burst forth from her chilled lips, releasing a long-inhaled cloud of vapour with it.

"What are you talking about?"

A slither of guilt surfaced on the woman's face before being instantly quelled.

"I have an idea of where they might be".

"What?"

* * *

"So this is the place," Sakura said slowly, voice lowered so as not to carry far in the eerie pre-dawn light. Eyes alert for the slightest flicker of movement probed the surroundings carefully. Abruptly the forest of trees ended, opening up onto a wall of thick mist. The medic slowed instantly and glanced at her newfound companion, watching the old woman for a sign. Sensing her questioning gaze, Chiyo appraised the medic briefly and gave her a thin-lipped smile which – Sakura realised – was probably intended to be encouraging.

Without waiting for a response, the old woman struck out across the exposed foggy ground and through the impenetrable wall which eagerly rose up to engulf her hunched figure. Sakura stood alone at the cusp of the forest, fighting rising signs of anxiety as her frozen limbs struggled to respond to her thoughts.

It was impossible to ignore the sickening wave of unease that had assailed her from the moment she'd actually stopped to consider the plan. Now she was so close, the crushing weight forced her to gasp and seek the firm, solid feel of a nearby oak. For the first time, she wondered how Deidara would react. Troubling scenarios, each more unlikely than the last danced through her panicked mind.

With a small sigh, she forced herself to walk forward through the swirling mist. It was too late to turn back now, she reasoned. She should see this through to the end, at the very least.

Grey, insubstantial shapes rose out of the mist so fast that the medic drew back in surprise. She had never anticipated the possibility that they had not yet reached the end of the forest for sure enough, there were more trees perched precariously on the lip of what appeared to be a colossal cliff face. Lowering her line of sight, she spotted Chiyo examining a large boulder at the base of the cliff. To her dismay, a chakra tag clung to the face of the rock. Apparently brute force would not serve in this instance but on the upside, it proved that Chiyo had been right.

"How did you know about this place?" Sakura whispered, eying the towering rock face suspiciously.

"My grandson and I used to come here all the time," Chiyo replied, not troubling to keep her voice down. "We would practice puppetry away from the confines of the village".

Sakura sighed, irked by the woman's apparent lack of concern for safety. She might not care about alerting Sasori to her presence but the medic did.

"How are we supposed to break through this?" Sakura asked, gesturing to the solid rock face hopelessly.

"We're not," Chiyo replied with a hint of smugness. "There's a secret entrance at the back where I used to hide my most valuable tools. Others beside us knew about this cave. I wanted to make sure my belongings were safe".

"And Sasori never knew about this entrance?"

The elderly woman gave an indifferent shrug. "He might have done but we won't know until we take a look, will we?"

Unable to shake the feeling that Chiyo was deliberately withholding information, Sakura fell in line behind the old woman hoping that she hadn't made a serious mistake in allaying herself with someone she knew almost nothing about. Her sensei would most certainly be having a few words with her if word of it ever reached his ears.

With the agility of a much younger woman, Chiyo sprang up the cliff face. Sakura couldn't help but feel slightly amazed as she watched the elderly woman scale the cliff without any means of chakra to steady herself, cleverly using the natural footholds and precipices to support her. The medic watched with apprehensive eyes, mapping the route Chiyo took up the cliff face. Then, it was her turn.

Several breathless minutes later Sakura crested the last hurdle, immensely relieved to be back on even ground again. Apart from one minor mistake half-way up where she spent several frantic moments trying to locate the next foothold, the journey had been relatively smooth. She realised she was breathing hard.

"Where to next?" she asked a stationary Chiyo.

Wordlessly, the woman pointed a gnarled finger in the direction of a line of trees.

"It goes quite far back," Chiyo said matter-of-factly. "I hope you don't mind a little dirt. You aren't claustrophobic, are you?"

The pink-haired medic shook her head as she unconsciously adjusted her fingerless gloves. "Let's go".

The secret entrance was much smaller than Sakura expected, and well hidden. Smoothing aside the dead bracken, she decided that it reminded her more of an animal hole than an entrance. She eyed the hole nervously, wondering whether she could fit into such a small gap in the earth but before she had time to voice her concerns, Chiyo was sliding into it. With a small sigh, Sakura followed suit.

Her ankle threatened to buckle as she hit the bottom surprisingly fast and spent several seconds scrabbling against dirt as she fought for her balance. Inky blackness pressed in on her from all sides and from what her body was telling her, it felt as though she were standing at the bottom of a well rather than the entrance to a tunnel. She swallowed rising panic. Where had the old woman disappeared to? There wasn't enough space for two. Almost instantly, she felt a slight breeze wash over her exposed toes and with a little probing she discovered a small tunnel leading downwards.

Resignedly, she crouched down in the dirt and began to crawl through the cramped tunnel. The walls closed in over her, cutting out all sounds of the forest outside. Deprived of all light, Sakura was acutely aware of the damp earth lining the walls and ceiling. She dared not touch the walls after finding that a large clump of earth crumbled away at her touch but she couldn't prevent her shoulders knocking against it in the enclosed space. Her breathing sounded abnormally loud in the dark and she could feel her clothes were soaked, if not stained brown by the mass amount of dirt surrounding her.

Minutes, hours or even days later the medic sensed that the tunnel was beginning to level out. She was grateful. Her knees felt cramped and sore from the ordeal. A faint chink of light drew her eyes and she watched as it slowly expanded. So absorbed in observing it, she almost bumped into Chiyo who was crouched near the entrance of the tunnel.

"This tunnel leads into a small side cavern off the main one," the elderly woman whispered. "There used to be a crate blocking the entrance but someone has moved it."

"So Deidara and Sasori know about this tunnel?" Sakura replied, fighting rising signs of alarm.

"It is quite possible, yes".

"We should turn back," Sakura said, inching away from the light. "We should contact the others and tackle this differently".

"No," Chiyo whispered adamantly, gripping Sakura's sleeve in an attempt to stop her. "This is the only chance you'll get to speak to him".

Sakura glanced at the old woman sharply. There was desperation etched in every line of her face and her mouth was drawn into a tight, worrisome knot. Vaguely she wondered at the lengths a grandmother would to go for her grandson; a grandson who was more of a surrogate son than anything. Without waiting for a response, Chiyo edged towards the lip of the tunnel and the cave beyond.

"Wait! I don't think we should wander blindly into this!"

"We're not," she called back. "I know what I'm doing".

"Yeah, but I don't!" Sakura whispered at her retreating back. "Hey! Come back!"

She scrabbled forwards, expelling a mass amount of dirt in her haste. Abruptly the tunnel came to an end and she stood blinking in the gloomy cavern, eyes struggling to make sense of the comparatively bright light. They were in a small cave littered with what appeared to be the remnants of a hastily cooked meal. After a brief examination, she concluded it was only several hours old. Fighting signs of rising apprehension, she located Chiyo near to the natural archway leading into what must be the main cavern. Without the crate to conceal it, the tunnel was glaringly obvious to anyone who searched the small cavern. It was certain that Sasori and Deidara would know about this entrance.

Clenching her fists in anticipation, Sakura edged closer to the archway. Her pulse quickened as she neared, unable to shake the feeling that this was an extremely bad idea. Instinctively she cast out her senses into the gaping void beyond the archway, sensing for the tiniest pin-prick of life. Inexplicably, she sensed nothing.

"They're not here?" Sakura breathed. "How is that possible?"

"They must be," Chiyo answered, sounding a little unsure. She rose silently from her crouched position by the door. "Perhaps-"

The old woman paused in mid-sentence as a flicker of movement caught her eye. Sakura was striding through the archway determinedly, straightening her gloves as she did so.

"Don't be a fool, Sakura," Chiyo hissed in alarm. "Come back".

Sakura refused to acknowledge her, her mind focused on one single-minded thought. She'd been avoiding Deidara long enough. Now was the time to confront him. To tell him what she truly thought and not what she was supposed to think, and to finally hear what he'd tried to tell her in the glade.

Immediately upon entering the cavern, she felt a change in the atmosphere. The air felt cooler and less stuffy. She could almost sense that the height of the ceiling was suspended many metres above her head. The slow steady drip of water trickling down stalagmites reached her strained ears as she searched for the faintest echo of a sound that didn't belong. Dark shadows moved at the periphery of her vision but vanished as soon as she turned to confront them. She hoped they were the product of an overactive imagination and _not_ the alternative.

The unmistakeable clatter of a solitary pebble rolling across the floor, made her spin around in alarm, heart thudding unnaturally fast.

"Show yourself!" The words burst from her lips angrily and bounced off the walls creating the illusion of many voices shouting the same thing. Before the echoes had quite died, she thought she heard a chuckle of laughter.

A brilliant light illuminated the cavern, creating spots of light which danced across Sakura's vision. Squinting through the glare, she thought she saw a dark shape crouched upon the wall. However, upon closer inspection it vanished.

"Sakura!" she heard Chiyo's strained aged voice from the direction of what appeared to be a flare. "Are you alright?"

"There's someone here," she replied shakily. "I didn't see who-"

"You took so long I was beginning to think you weren't coming," a deep, gutteral voice punctuated the air. The voice was rough and course which strangely reminded Sakura of a threatening desert storm. She had only heard that voice once before; on the night Kankuro died.

"Sasori?" Chiyo croaked, confirming Sakura's suspicions as her eyes searched the pitch black corners of the room for her beloved grandson.

"That's right," the puppet-master replied. Cold amusement punctuated every syllable sending shivers down the medic's spine. A cascade of echoes disguised the point of origin from which the voice originated, meaning that Sakura was unsure from which direction she should defend.

Defence was the least of her concerns however. Only one single thought existed in her mind; repeating itself over and over like a broken record. Vaguely she sensed it would be better to say nothing but the longer that question remained unanswered, the more agitated she became. She simply _had_ to know the answer!

"Where's Deidara?"

There was a slight pause, which seemed to span across several decades to the frustrated, impatient medic. She felt a presence behind her; a malicious, dark presence intent on deciphering the hidden meanings in her words. She felt exposed, vulnerable. In that moment, it was as though he knew exactly what she hadn't said and how far she would go to get the answers she was looking for.

"Ah, so you must be Sakura". The words were cruel and mocking. A verbal provocation aimed to goad the medic into sudden action. She clenched her fists in annoyance. It was the oldest trick in the book and Sakura was determined not to fall for it.

"Where is he?" She repeated, her tones laced with impatience.

The laughter was back again. Sakura ground her teeth in agitation, hoping that despite his amusement he would answer her question.

"That's really none of your concern," he replied smugly. "And I wouldn't worry about him if I were you. I'd be more worried about surviving this battle".

"Why, you-," the medic snarled, marching towards the source of the voice, her eyes flashing. But before she'd even made two paces she felt an unexpected resistance.

"Leave it".

Chiyo gripped her arm tightly, her eyes stern. It was not a request. It was a command.

"Sakura, be smart about this," the old woman hissed urgently in her ear. "He's not going to tell you anything unless he wants to. By allowing him to anger you, you are playing right into his hands. You won't last five minutes against him without a strategy".

"Oh and I suppose you have one?" Sakura asked sarcastically.

A ghost of a smile flittered across the aged, worn face. "Actually, I do".

* * *

A deafening bang shook the entire cavern as one of the walls collapsed in an explosion of rock and dust. Sakura squinted through the brilliant light shining through the gap in the cavern, unaccustomed to the bright sunshine. She spluttered uncontrollably as she inhaled a large amount of dust. Rocks littered the ground, transforming the cavern floor from the sturdy, smooth surface to an unpredictable, uneven floor.

"Chiyo?" She called urgently, shielding her eyes from little clouds of dust. "Chiyo!"

She rose unsteadily to her feet, leaning against one of the rocks for support. The Akatsuki was extremely skilled and she'd been hard pressed to dodge every single one of his weapons, which had all been dipped in the same deadly poison that had killed Kankuro. She knew that without Chiyo, she'd have been dead a long time ago.

The elderly shinobi had controlled all her actions from the sidelines, allowing her to dodge his every attack and calculate his technique without actually sustaining any damage. It had come as a shock when one well-placed chakra-laden fist found its mark, shattering the puppet Hiruko which Sasori had been encased in all along. A pregnant silence had ensued, in which Sakura had gaped at the teenage boy who appeared to be barely older than herself. One quick glance at Chiyo showed that the old woman was just as stunned as she was.

"How?" the old woman had croaked. "How is this possible?"

Sasori had then gone on to explain that he had preserved his body by means of turning it into one of his hideous puppets and so, making him effectively immortal. Sakura was repulsed by the very notion and had stared at the red-head with distaste before attacking him once more. Now most of his puppets had been dismantled so it was just the three of them: Chiyo, Sasori and Sakura. Or at least it would be if Chiyo had survived the explosion.

"Chiyo!" She repeated, her voice echoing off the cavernous walls. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, child," came a feeble reply somewhere behind her. Sakura spun around to see Chiyo emerge from a pile of rubble, looking battered and bruised but very much alive. "Where's Sasori?"

Sakura pointed a finger towards a mountain of rocks under which the puppet-master lay. Chiyo appraised it briefly.

"That won't hold him for long," she answered. "I suggest you leave to find some help".

"Don't be absurd!" Sakura replied, aghast. "I'm not letting you deal with him alone. I'm staying".

As if to reinforce that statement, a shattering of rock behind them announced Sasori's return to the battle field.

"You'll pay for that, little girl," he snarled, twisting his boyish features into an ugly look. The puppet-master was furious that such a young, weak shinobi and his grandmother could prove such a match for him. He was Sasori of the Red Sand; not a foe to be taken lightly.

"Get ready, Sakura," Chiyo called, attaching chakra strings to the medic's body once more. She merely nodded and straightened her gloves, a determined look in her eye.

Footsteps sounded on the gravel outside. _Reinforcements!_ Sakura thought, as her heart soared. But she couldn't have been more wrong.

"Sakura!"

She need not ask who had spoken. The deep, velvety voice was comforting and familiar. She had not heard it for a few days and yet it had felt an age since she last heard it. Distracted she turned, an intentional smile forming on her lips.

"Deidara," she breathed, taking a few steps towards him.

Bathed in the midday sun, he looked stunning. Light danced off his golden hair, illuminating his body in an almost heavenly glow. The tight-fitting mesh top only served to accentuate his toned body. And his eyes; his brilliant, cerulean blue eyes seemed to pierce through her very soul, full of happiness at the sight of her before gradually turning to horror.

"Sakura, move!" He yelled, as she heard the tell-tale swish of an object flying straight through the air. She spun in the direction of the sound, sighting the needle as it was almost upon her. There was no time to react. It was moving too fast. She couldn't possibly avoid it. She closed her eyes.

Something warm and solid sent her flying the instant before impact and she fell sprawling to the floor. A grunt of pain reached her ears. Deidara! He had moved faster than she had thought possible. Why had he done that for her? Why would he risk everything to save her life?

An instant later she was on her feet and at his side. She saw instantly that the needle was embedded deeply into his side and a widening pool of blood was staining the rock on which he lay. A sudden wave of nausea gripped her, which had nothing to do with the injuries she saw and everything to do with the identity of the person dying in front of her.

"You are fool, Deidara," Sasori's surprised but slightly amused voice echoed throughout the cavern. "Why throw everything away for one silly, little girl?"

Deidara ignored him, focusing on the medic crouched over him instead. A small smile spread across his lips which she returned, her lip trembling.

"Sakura," Deidara whispered, moving his hand up to her face to brush a few stray pink strands aside. She shrank at the contact, appalled at what he'd done for her. The pain that he was so desperate to conceal was revealed plainly to her in his brilliant blue eyes. She couldn't bear to watch. Angrily, she brushed a few stray tears aside.

"Don't move," the medic snapped, angry that he had taken the blow for her, that he was in pain _because_ of her and most of all, because he'd made her care.

Praying that Chiyo would keep Sasori busy, she risked a quick analysis of his wound. Miraculously, none of his vital organs had been hit. Under normal circumstances, Sakura was certain he'd live. Whether he'd survive the poison however was another matter. He needed medical attention. Instantly.

"Why did you do that?" She asked incredulously; numb disbelief washing over her tired features. "Why would you do that for me?"

Deidara opened his mouth to speak, but turned aside at the last second, coughing uncontrollably. Sakura was alarmed to see flecks of red litter the stone floor. Once he'd finished, he used his sleeve to brush the scarlet liquid from the corners of his mouth.

_No!_ Sakura thought desperately. She had no idea how fast acting the poison was. Kankuro had died almost instantly because of the sheer amount that had entered his system. The large wound had damaged several organs, allowing the poison to run rampant through his body, ensuring his death within minutes. Deidara had longer, but how much longer Sakura couldn't tell. She stared around desperately, looking for any signs of help.

"The Sand shinobi I fought should be here soon. You should leave, Sakura," Deidara choked suddenly. Instantly, she sought his eyes again and fixed them with an unwavering gaze.

"I'm not going anywhere," she promised, squeezing his hand gently.

"Sakura, get him out of here!" Chiyo called. "I'll be alright. If you want to save his life, you need to do it now!"

"You're wasting your time," Sasori's mocking tones reached their ears. "There is no cure for that poison".

"How can you be sure?" Sakura shot back angrily. "If there's a cure, I'll find one because I'm never giving up!"

"Hmph," Sasori replied, clearly having lost interest in the conversation. "Do as you wish".

Sakura ignored him, instead turning her attention to the man on the ground.

"Can you walk?"

"I can try," he answered, gripping the edge of a nearby rock tightly in an attempt to hoist himself up off the ground. Halfway to standing, he swayed and would have fallen if Sakura hadn't grasped his arm at the last second.

"You'll have to lean on me," she told him, putting on a smile that was braver than she felt. "I'll get you out of here, don't worry".

Stumbling under Deidara's heavy weight, Sakura guided him towards the exit. She ignored his frequent grunts of pain and focused on navigating the easiest route through the fallen debris. At the exit, she looked back at Chiyo and her grandson locked in battle.

"Thank you," she whispered.

* * *

**Please review :) It really makes my day!  
**


	13. Sanctuary

**A/N:** Surprise! A new Consequences chapter! Had such bad writers block with this one, had to re-write a lot of it. Hope it was worth the wait. I'd love to hear your feedback!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Naruto in any way shape or form.

* * *

**Chapter 13: Sanctuary**

"Come on!" Sakura grit her teeth furiously as she urged her fatigued muscles to strive harder. Slowly, painfully, they struggled onwards, gaining ground inch by inch as Sakura strained against the weight laying heavily on her shoulder. A stone in the road - a relatively minor obstacle - caused Deidara to stumble and he would have fell if she hadn't caught his stained, ripped shirt in time.

"Careful," she murmured, wincing as his ragged, gasping breaths punctuated the air. She half-expected him to answer with an aggravated "I know, yeah!" but instead she got silence. She shifted his weight further onto her shoulder and steadied him with one sweaty, bloodied hand, never once complaining that she'd got the lion's share of the task. It was her fault he was in this mess, after all.

She glanced back the way they came, amazed that they had made it even this far. The dusty trail wound and twisted through the ancient trees, shielding them from view and she hoped against hope that her little trick with the river had bought them enough time to get safely away. She peeked worriedly at her partner. Tiny rivulets of bright, red liquid trickled down his side and splattered the pale, luminous blades of grass.

"How long has this been happening?" She accused the semi-conscious blond, anger unintentionally leaking into her tones. The medic sighed. She was bone-tired and close to cracking under the stress but that was no excuse to take it out on him.

Deidara shook his head exhaustedly. "I don't know, yeah". He gripped her tighter, attempting to control his erratic breathing. "About five minutes," he guessed.

"Next time tell me straight away," Sakura reprimanded as she gently eased him onto a nearby boulder and examined the weeping wound. Deidara didn't bother to answer. He could barely focus on the ground beneath his feet, let alone some tiny drops of red fluid that might fall onto it.

"This bandage needs changing," she muttered to herself as she fished around in her pack for another roll. "Here," she handed him a sterilised cloth. "Press this against the wound while I change your bandages. It will staunch the bleeding for a time".

As swiftly as she could manage, the bandages were replaced and they were ready to set off. Sakura grasped his large, tanned hand firmly and half-pulled, half-hoisted him to his feet. He was barely upright when he swayed, his vision unfocused.

"Don't give up on me now, Deidara," she warned. She made an effort to smile but was unsure whether it had had the desired effect. It had felt incredibly like a grimace.

The sun beat down furiously on the two travellers as they slowly progressed across a vast grassy area, the sanctuary of the trees long gone. Sakura felt her exposed skin begin to burn under the continued exposure but she was more concerned about the effect the sun was having on Deidara. He had drank the last of their water over an hour ago and although the bleeding had finally abated, his condition was worse than ever. The ragged breathing had transformed into an unhealthy wheezing and Sakura couldn't help but notice the way he clutched his chest tightly as though each breath caused him pain.

"Just a little further," she said cajolingly, but her words rang hollow even to her own ears.

Beads of sweat trickled down her forehead and her top was sticking to her back. She lifted her head wearily, suddenly spying a group of trees in the distance that wavered and danced through the lines of shimmering heat. "You'd better not be a mirage," she muttered savagely.

Time lost all meaning as she struggled on with her heavy burden, towards the line of trees. Her whole world was reduced to the bulk of his weight on her shoulder, the combined sounds of their laboured breathing. After what seemed like an age, Sakura staggered to a halt beneath the shade of a huge, hoary oak and tenderly laid Deidara against its rough trunk. The sight of his fevered brow contorted with pain caused her chest to constrict with worry.

"Deidara?" Sakura softly wiped the beads of sweat away, watching his face uncertainly. His eyes were closed and he seemed not to hear her. With trepidation, she lifted the stained, stinking bandage from his body. It was as bad as she'd feared. The wound had gone a funny colour and it was oozing thick, yellow pus. Sakura could waste no more time. It needed treating immediately.

It seemed to take forever for the little fire to light and heat the spring water she'd mercifully found. When it began to bubble, the medic could have sighed with relief. She treated it as best she could, the civilian way, not daring to use huge amounts of chakra until she was sure they couldn't be tracked. She knelt on her knees, weighing her options. For Deidara to have even a chance at survival, she needed to find a suitable place to heal him, a cave or some such, somewhere with shelter from the dark rain clouds that were slowly moving across the sky. The second thing she needed to do was conceal their trail and lay false ones, but his condition was critical. She couldn't leave him now. Which meant... her hands flew in a flurry of complicated movements and a second later, six clones stood before her.

"You know what to do," she said. They nodded and shot off in different directions.

The sudden dip in her energy levels caused her limbs to sag alarmingly. She blinked at the fatigue and fumbled through her bag for a small pack of her homemade soldier pills. If truth be told, she hadn't actually tried them out yet except on Naruto who'd claimed they were disgusting but she expected that he'd been exaggerating.

She popped one in her mouth and started to chew automatically. As soon as she bit into the pill, it released an overwhelming, indescribably revolting flavour that forced her to gag reflexively. Hurriedly she swallowed the pill, washing it down with some water. Unfortunately, the aftertaste was harder to get rid of.

"Urrgh," she spluttered. "Naruto was right. These _are_ disgusting!"

Despite their abhorrent taste, the pills seemed to have done their job for Sakura felt perfectly alert and full of energy. She made a mental note to change the recipe in future but for now she'd have to put up with the taste. She had a feeling she'd need to take some more before the day was out.

She sat back and lay against the rough tree next to Deidara, fighting off the worry that clawed at her insides. She realised that she'd interlaced her fingers with his own and was alarmed at how fevered his skin felt. He was burning up faster than she'd anticipated.

At that moment, a clone skidded to a halt in front of her, panting for breath.

"I've found somewhere we can stay for the night," the clone motioned for her to follow. "It's a bit dusty but it will have to do".

* * *

_Heat. Scorching, blistering heat. The desert had found a way inside him, choking him. Burning and searing the soft pink walls of his throat. It was agony. Each breath was as though he was inhaling a mouthful of hot ash. It was almost impossible to overcome his natural instinct to breathe in the oxygen so vital to his survival. His body was still fighting, but Deidara had given up._

_The intense torture had all but blinded him to his surroundings. He was aware only of the fierce heat. A great, raging inferno which started at his midriff and had spread slowly, torturously, like poison to the rest of his body._

_Where am I?_

_Oblivious to his surroundings, he could no longer tell whether it was soft, springy grass beneath him, hard rock or sand. Even the ability to discern whether it was day or night escaped him. He tried to call out but the intense heat was suffocating: he could barely draw breath._

_Hours, days, weeks, months passed with no release. Deidara had become a prisoner in his own body and he no longer had the strength to endure. His thoughts came sluggishly, with little sense or reason. He could only watch with increasing impotence as the last vestiges of energy left his body._

_And then the darkness was complete._

* * *

"No!" Sakura growled, biting her lip so hard it drew blood. "Come on! Live!"

She pumped his chest furiously, salty tears mixing in with the loose pink strands which had fallen out of her bun. Her arms burned from the effort but she refused to let up, refused to let him go.

"No," she said to herself angrily, as if saying it would make it true. "He's not dead! He's not!"

As she worked she sent out tendrils of chakra to assess his heart, but it remained silent. This was the second time his stuttering heart had failed, but last time she had brought him back in under a minute.

"Deidara," she pleaded, half choking on the words as tears splattered his chest. "Please come back. Please don't leave me".

Her limbs were shaking violently and she was acutely aware that his brain could only survive so long without oxygen. She knew that she must stop soon or risk bringing back someone with potential brain damage.

"Deidara," she begged, her voice trembling with grief and anguish. For the last time, she injected as much chakra as she dared into his heart and miraculously it began to beat again. Sakura sank back into the small rickety chair and shakily wiped the sweat from her brow. That had been too close, much too close for comfort.

She allowed herself a couple of minutes of relief and waited until her limbs stopped quivering. She felt nauseous and mentally drained yet despite this, she knew that she mustn't stop. Getting his heart to restart had only been half the battle. She still had to find a cure to the poison that attacked his system so ruthlessly. By drawing some of the poison out, she had managed to slow the advance and buy him time, but what good was time when Sakura had no antidote to administer to him?

The little chair squeaked ominously as the medic rose wearily and crossed the bare floor of the small hunter's cabin to the window. Rain lashed relentlessly at the thin pane of glass, making it almost impossible to peer outside into the inky blackness. It was a miserable sight and Sakura turned away from it hastily, wanting to consult her gigantic medical tome one more time. Yet what good was that when the characteristics of this particular poison were not mentioned, not once in over a thousand pages. Even worse was that there wasn't a poison that came close to this one. The medic had hoped that by treating him with an antidote for a similar poison that it might work. But those hopes had been dashed long ago.

Sasori had boasted that there was no cure to that poison and Sakura - ever optimistic - was starting to believe him.

She returned to the bed, feeling disheartened and sick with worry. She had to admit it was not the most savoury of places to treat a patient, especially one with a condition as critical as Deidara's. The curtains were lined with mildew, though thankfully the thin, ragged bedding she'd discovered in a cupboard had been spared that same fate. Bear traps caked in rust hung malevolently from one wall and the matt covering the wooden floorboards had almost disintegrated at her touch and now lay dejected on top of the compost heap. There was an old cracked sink in the bathroom and a porcelain tub that looked as though it hadn't been used in years. However, the roof was sound and apart from a little crack at the window, no wind could enter the cabin.

Concernedly, she checked his vital organs as she continued to draw poison from his system. Nothing had been permanently damaged yet but it was only a matter of time. He stirred feverishly and his brow knitted together. She dabbed at his forehead with a damp cloth, wishing to smooth those lines away, wishing there was something else she could do. The herbs and plants in her pack were standard, common ingredients. If only she had thought to pack some of the more unusual varieties.

Sakura jumped to her feet, heart pounding. But she _did_ have some unusual plants in her bag! She'd bought some from the woman at the stall in Suna. It was a long shot, but it was possible one of them might be the antidote she so desperately needed.

Wasting no more time, she ran to her bag and pulled out the herbs and her testing equipment. A square wooden table laden with various magazines lay in the corner. Shoving aside a three year old edition of Naughty Ninjas and several peeling copies of Guns and Ammo, Sakura finally had a space to work on.

At first glance, it appeared that these herbs had been grown and cultivated in Suna, but it quickly became obvious that this was not the case. In fact, Sakura had no idea where these herbs might have come from. They certainly had the most unusual properties. For example, one had an immediate calming effect on the consumer and another appeared to reduce inflammation. On the second to last herb when she was starting to get desperate, she struck lucky.

She wasted no time in mixing the stringy, purple-coloured herb into a paste with her pestle and mortar, then heated it briefly over the kerosene stove she'd found and combined it with water to create a very unattractive looking fluid.

"I hope this works," the medic whispered as she poured some into Deidara's mouth. He instinctively swallowed and Sakura poured in some more. Eventually the glass was empty. Struggling valiantly to stay awake, she discovered some spare blankets in yet another cupboard inhabited with spiders. Impatiently she brushed them aside and wrapped a blanket around herself, forming a cocoon-shape and within seconds she was asleep, cuddled up against the hard arm of the spindly chair.

* * *

Hours later, Sakura awoke with a jolt. Her deadened arm had begun to prickle with the tell-tale sign of pins and needles but it wasn't that which had awoken her. The torrential downpour had halted to a mere drizzle. Strangely, Sakura missed the sound of the soothing, relentless patter of rain on metal. She stretched awkwardly on the chair and decided to go and check on her patient. And then she heard it. The sound which had woken her.

Someone was knocking on the door outside, wanting to come in.

Every muscle in the kunoichi's body tensed and chakra flickered at the ends of her fingertips. It could just be a harmless civilian seeking shelter from the rain or it could be the owner of this cabin who would be certain to notice the broken lock on the front door. Somehow Sakura doubted it.

Edging closer to the door, her heart beating out a tense rhythm, Sakura peered through the dusty window. The moon was hiding behind the clouds making it impossible to see. Quick as a snake, she darted towards the door and wrenched it open.

Standing a few paces away, his face grimmer than she had ever seen it stood Kakashi. For a moment, neither one moved. Sakura's face was full of shock as she scrutinised the familiar lines of her sensei's face. He was watching her silently as though waiting for something.

Finally, in deeply disappointed tones he said, "we need to talk". He motioned to an area away from the cabin and she reluctantly followed. It was chilly outside and Sakura almost considered bringing her blanket out with her but she didn't want to risk him seeing Deidara lying asleep and defenceless on the bed.

"Sensei, I-" she began with no idea of what she was about to say.

"I don't want to hear your excuses, Sakura," her mentor said tiredly, his words cutting through her like a knife. "We only have a few minutes. I cannot linger here".

Sakura stared at her feet, unsure of what to say. Finally she said, "Why did you come?" She sank despondently onto an upturned rusted bucket. "I had no intention of dragging you into this," she continued. "If you're seen with me-"

"I don't intend to be seen". Her mentor sent her a crooked smile. "I came to give you some advice and I can only hope you'll listen to me, Sakura". He lifted her chin gently, forcing their eyes to meet. "I failed with Sasuke. I do not want to make the same mistakes with you". Deep regret glistened in his grey eyes.

Sakura looked away uncomfortably. Bringing up the Sasuke card was a low blow and Kakashi knew it. She searched his tired, grey face for answers. He must be really serious about convincing her to leave. However he would need to be prepared to fight dirty, use every trick in the book to have even the slimmest chance of persuading her to leave. Kakashi would never sink that low, she knew. She almost breathed a sigh of relief.

"I'm not like Sasuke," Sakura answered seriously. "I would never attempt to force everyone I cared about out of my life to follow one-single minded goal. I would never betray any of you". She pushed her hair - which so reminded Kakashi of the colour of cherry blossoms - out of her face anxiously. "It's because I care that I must do this. I can't let him die".

"Sakura," he said gently, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. "You can't save everyone".

"No," she persisted, pushing his hand away and standing to face him. "You don't understand".

His pale eyes were fathomless and she could see the sorrow and pity vying for attention in their depths.

"No, Sakura," he continued. "You don't understand". He paced up and down agitatedly like a caged beast. "Do you think," he said, brushing his fingers worriedly through his hair, "that if I hadn't been there to distort your trail that you would have ever reached this place? I cannot lead them astray forever. Eventually they will find you, and when they do-"

"Don't worry, sensei," Sakura smiled a brilliant, disarming smile that was more confident than she felt. "I've got it all under control".

"There's still time," Kakashi argued, ignoring her comment. "If you leave now, there will be little consequence. You have a good heart Sakura, I know what you did was out of guilt. He saved your life and you felt like you owed him. No one will blame you for that," he held her hands in his. "Please don't ask me to watch as they hunt you down like an animal".

Sakura slowly took her hands from his, her heart wracked with guilt. She had never truly considered the consequences her actions would have for her friends up until now.

"Kakashi, do you remember when we first became a team?" Sakura said, feeling a sudden rush of remorse for what she was about to do. "You told us that those who break the rules are trash but those who abandon their friends are worse. I can't abandon Deidara".

"Sakura," he shook his head. "Don't confuse the issue. Deidara is not your friend".

"How would you know?" She countered, stung by his words.

Her sensei sighed deeply. "He is your friend because it suits him, Sakura. It sounds harsh but I think you need to hear it. He doesn't value your friendship any more than the lives of those shinobi he killed. When you are no longer useful to him, he will abandon you or betray you. Is that the kind of friend you want?"

Anger boiled up inside of her and she pushed him roughly away. "Deidara would never do that! You don't _know_ him. He never chose this life!"

"Sakura, listen-"

"No," she replied wearily. "I've heard enough." She placed her hand on her forehead, trying to ward off an oncoming migraine. "Just go, please".

"I can lead the others astray for three days, no longer," her sensei's face was lined with worry. "I won't be able to protect you if you are caught. Please think about what you are doing".

She blinked but when she opened her eyes again, he'd vanished.

"I'm sorry, Kakashi," she whispered, brushing away a few tears with the back of her hand. Slowly, she walked back to the hut, the enormity of her decision weighing heavily on her shoulders. Seldom had she ever felt so alone.

It felt comparatively warm inside after the chill night breeze. Sakura automatically checked Deidara's forehead, pleased to see that the fever was abating. She flexed her fingers in an attempt to bring some circulation back to them and routinely scanned his body. The poison was less than before too, she was sure of it and for the first time his breathing appeared almost normal.

A giant bubble of happiness welled up inside her, and feeling emboldened, she snuggled into bed beside him, enjoying the warmth of his skin after the chill outside. She couldn't bear the thought of being alone. Suddenly she grinned and bit her lip, almost laughing at Deidara's imagined reaction when he would wake to find her in his arms. Within seconds she fell asleep, a small smile on her tired face. Tomorrow could wait.


	14. Surrender

**A/N:** Surprise! The next installment of Consequences is here! Please let me know what you think!

**Warning: This chapter contains scenes of a sexual nature. **

* * *

**Chapter 14: Surrender**

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"So this is when I tell you to "go fish", right?"

Sakura glanced up from her set of cards, an amused expression transforming her exhausted features. Deidara sat casually across from her holding his own set, a dubious expression upon his face. The sunlight streamed in through the dirty windows, highlighting the extent of disrepair the cabin had fallen into. She noticed the cobwebs strewn across the walls and made a mental note to dust away the unwanted decorations as soon as possible.

"Right," she smiled, taking one card from the top of the pile and adding it to her already full hand. "It's your turn," she prompted when he showed no signs of continuing play. Deidara didn't move.

"Why "go fish" though, yeah?"

Sakura smiled, suppressing the urge to laugh. Really, that was so typical of Deidara. Once he got something into his head, he wouldn't let it go. He'd been dropping not so subtle hints about the title ever since they'd started the game. The medic began to wish that she'd not been so quick to suggest that they play with the musty old cards she found in one of the draws. "Trust you to over-complicate such a simple game". Their eyes met as they shared a smile and a tingle ran up her spine. "Got any fives?"

He handed two over, not at all sorry that he was losing the game. "How about "go fuck yourself"?" He grinned. "That's what I'd say, yeah".

Sakura shot him a half-hearted stern look, ignoring the swooping sensation that flooded her stomach. Deidara's piercing blue eyes seemed to cut right through her and she dropped her gaze quickly, afraid that he might read the desire in them.

They had not spoken about the events of the night before; of how Sakura had intended to rise early so that Deidara would be none the wiser, of how he had awoken to find the kunoichi fast asleep in his arms, no doubt worn out from the rigorous healing session. Gently, he had eased himself from the bed, not wanting to disturb her and took a long, cold shower from the rusty showerhead installed in a tiled area a little way from the cabin. Upon returning he discovered her cooking pancakes on the stove, a curtain of hair concealing her expression. He had decided not to broach the subject with her and gingerly crossed over to the bed, trying not to wince and blinking fiercely as his vision blurred but too prideful to say anything.

"You have a terrible poker face, yeah". Deidara smirked, watching Sakura closely. "Admit it, you like my version of the game".

"My poker face is just fine," Sakura countered, drawing herself up straighter and forcing her face to assume a blank expression.

"You know what?" Deidara smirked even more broadly. "I'm inclined to test that theory, yeah". He shuffled his cards back into the deck and held out his hand for hers. Reluctantly she handed them over. "You ready to play a game of poker?"

"But we don't have chips to play with," she protested weakly. Her eyes scoured the room as though hoping some would materialise. She had a vague inkling of where this was going and she had a feeling she wasn't going to like it.

"I'm not talking about that kind of poker, Sakura". His intense gaze gave her butterflies and then his meaning came home.

"You can't be serious?" She fought down equal parts excitement and embarrassment as she forced herself to meet his eyes, her heart beating furiously. A wave of anxiety gripped her as she contemplated the thought of him seeing her naked. No man had ever seen her naked before.

"Deadly," he answered, his eyes dancing mischievously. "Aren't you curious to see if you can beat me?"

"Nope, because I'll win," she replied, hoping to sound cool and unconcerned. In fact, she only had a loose understanding of the game and was banking on beginners luck to win. The stakes didn't look good but she was too stubborn to back out now.

"I doubt it". Deidara's laughter ended in a yelp of pain as Sakura punched him squarely in the arm.

"You sure know how to punch, yeah," he grumbled irritably as he rubbed his aching arm. He stood up to fetch some much-needed ice, swaying slightly and blinking in surprise as three Sakuras wearing concerned expressions swam before his eyes. He took two cautious steps forward and faltered, a look of frustration crossing his face.

"Deidara," the medic called worriedly, rising hastily from her seat and placing her hands against his bandaged chest to steady him. "Take it easy ok?" She guided him slowly to the bed where he slumped on the edge, close to passing out.

"How long have you been feeling like this?" she asked, checking his pulse and his forehead for signs of fever.

"All morning, yeah," he said, grimacing slightly as she accidentally brushed against the tender bruise on his arm. "I thought it would pass, yeah. In time".

"You're an idiot, Deidara," she said, her voice shaking slightly. "You're in no condition to be walking around. I should have checked you earlier. I assumed-"

She paused, worry and anger knotting her brow. The hopeful bubble that she had been nursing in her chest was slowly deflating. She had wrongly assumed that Deidara's promising start was a result of the medicine and not his indomitable sense of pride. The realisation that she had erred was like a smack in the face. It was unrealistic to assume that he would make a full recovery in just three days.

"Hey," Deidara reached out to grab her limp hands reassuringly, reading the anxiety in her green eyes. "Don't blame yourself, yeah."

"Yeah," Sakura attempted to smile, hoping to convince him that all was well. "I know".

She handed him another glass of the sweet-smelling concoction and he drained it in one and pulled a face.

"Not your favourite drink?" Sakura teased, taking back the empty glass and putting it in the sink alongside some dirty plates.

"Not really". He lay back on the pillow and pulled out a few stray feathers that were poking through the material. "But I think it's a small price to pay, yeah".

He smiled wearily at her, sending butterflies through her stomach and closed his eyes.

"I'll wake you in a few hours," Sakura said, intending to make the cabin fit for habitation in the meantime. "You'll need another dose of that medicine".

Deidara nodded his head to indicate that he'd heard and she resisted the urge to sweep the hair out of his eyes affectionately. With some effort, she pushed aside her worries and decided that for now she would concentrate on the present. First things first, she would tackle those cobwebs and clean that awful sink in the corner.

* * *

It was nightfall by the time Sakura had finished cleaning. She was seated on one of two freshly-chopped logs beside her hastily-erected campfire. A young deer was roasting slowly on a spit and every now and again, the young medic got up from her position on the log to turn the meat. The slowly emerging stars created a dim light by which to see as the trees swayed softly in the breeze. Sakura watched the glowing flames dart upwards, licking the meat tenderly and listened the comforting sound of the logs crackling in the darkness.

"Smells good," Deidara interrupted her train of thought, having finally emerged from the confines of the cabin.

"How are you feeling?" Sakura asked, rising slowly from her seat to probe his chest for signs of recovery. Her hands lingered there long after the chakra had faded from her fingertips and found herself staring into his eyes, unable to tear away. She lost herself in those infinite depths, forgetting where she was. She could feel his heart beat through the thin material that covered his skin. She took a step closer. Their faces were now almost touching and she trembled with unconcealed desire as she felt his warm breath upon her lips.

An owl hooted from a nearby tree and Sakura stumbled backwards in surprise. Swiftly, Deidara wrapped his arms around her to prevent her from tripping over the log.

"Sakura," he said softly, his eyes conveying across all the suppressed emotion he felt.

She closed her eyes almost instinctively as he kissed her tenderly. The skin of his lips were soft and yielding as they pressed against hers. A hot, swooping emotion like a phoenix erupted inside her at his touch. Smiling, she kissed him back harder, changing their tender kiss into something more desperate and passionate. She pressed her body against his as their lips moulded together seamlessly. Her fingers ran desperately through his hair as pulled her onto his hips and pressed her up against a nearby tree.

Sakura gasped for breath, enjoying the sensation of their closeness. She could feel him hardening underneath his trousers. It incited a desire in her stronger than anything she had previously experienced, her underwear suddenly wet from anticipation. Their lips crashed together once more. One hand slipped up her top and she gasped as he pinched her nipple, accidentally tearing her lips away from his in surprise.

It was then that she noticed their dinner cooking on the spit.

"Deidara," she said reluctantly, trying to ignore the light kisses he was now placing along the line of her neck. "Wait".

He stopped, watching her cautiously as though afraid he'd done something wrong. Thick strands of hair had fallen from her hair band, framing her face and Deidara's mesh shirt lay crumpled at his feet. Sakura couldn't remember pulling it off. Both of them were breathing heavily.

"What's wrong?" He followed her gaze to the camp fire. He swore when he saw what she was looking at. "I forgot the damn deer," he growled. He crossed over to the fire, irritation clear in his every move. "It's not burnt," he confirmed, "but we'll have to eat it now, yeah".

Sakura fetched some plates, ignoring the way her heart thudded erratically as she entered the darkened cabin. Strangely, she felt like doing a little jig but decided not to risk it. Knowing her, she'd probably break something. Her heart as light as her feet, she skipped outside and settled down next to Deidara on one of the logs. He passed her a sizzling joint of meat, the excitement not quite faded from his eyes.

For some minutes they ate together in silence. The meat was slightly overcooked and chewy yet somehow managed to still taste delicious. It put her in mind of wood-scented forests and pine cones. She glanced over at Deidara who appeared to be tackling his portion with slight difficulty. Sensing her gaze he looked up smiling which she returned automatically. There was no need for communication. They understood each other perfectly.

When the plates were scraped clean and their bellies full Sakura turned towards Deidara, their knees almost touching.

"You know," she broke the silence with a smile. "You never told me the story of how you became a shinobi. I told you mine, remember? Fair is fair".

"Sakura, I was in agony when you told me, remember?" Deidara smirked. "I couldn't focus on what you said, yeah. It's not my fault if your story wasn't interesting".

"Quit messing around Deidara, I know you heard me," Sakura grinned back, giving him a friendly shove. "It's not my fault if you're a poor liar".

"Alright," Deidara sighed staring off into the distance. "It's not some cute little rivalry story though, yeah". He took a moment to compose himself before he began. "My village was Iwagakure, as you correctly guessed. My father wasn't a shinobi but he was high up in the political council. My bloodline limit hadn't manifested in either of my parents and my father," he paused, taking a deep breath, "my father was never fully convinced that I was his child".

He fell silent. His eyes reflected the embers of the dying fire as he stared unseeing.

"There are DNA tests designed to determine that," Sakura said, resting a hand lightly on the crook of his arm. "If your father-"

"He did," Deidara replied bitterly. Sakura noticed that he'd dropped the unconscious "yeah" as his tone became more serious. "One night when I was ten, my father came home late. He'd been drinking". He heaved a great sigh. "It was only later that I found out that he had taken a strand of my hair to test my parentage. The test confirmed that I wasn't his son".

"What happened?" Sakura asked concernedly, taking her hand in his.

"He tried to kill me," he answered tonelessly. "My mother tried to protect me and in his rage, he killed her".

Silence greeted these words. Sakura was at a loss for what to say.

"The police arrested him," Deidara continued harshly. "But he was only detained for a few weeks. They let him off lightly because of his connections within the government". His eyes softened as he glanced at Sakura and his tone was much more gentle when he spoke. "Imagine wandering the streets of your village at ten. A place you've always viewed as safe. You've just watched your mother be murdered by your supposed father and you have nowhere to go, yeah".

"I can't imagine," said Sakura, her voice little more than a whisper.

"It's ok, yeah," Deidara sighed. "It was a long time ago".

Sakura sidled closer to him and wrapped her arm around his middle. "Where did you go?"

"The only place I could," he replied. "I applied to become a shinobi and they jumped at the chance to take me on because of my rare bloodline limit. I showed promise so I soon joined the ranks of the Explosion Corps but I could never forgive my village for what they had done, yeah".

He threw a log on the dying fire and watched it ignite. "The political system was corrupt to the core. My step-father should never have been allowed to walk free, yeah. So, I detonated the entire government building to free my village from corruption".

"So then you had to leave?" Sakura finished for him. "That's why you became a missing-nin in the first place".

"Yeah," he answered, watching her as though waiting for a reaction. After a couple of minutes he said, "tell me what you are thinking".

Sakura was rather taken aback. She realised that he must be wondering what she thought of him. "I think," she said, choosing her words carefully, "that you did what you had to, Deidara. What happened with your family was out of your control and if the government was so corrupt, then I can understand why you did it".

"Yeah," he sighed and leant back to stare at the stars.

"What happened to your step-father?" Sakura ventured to ask.

"He drank himself to death about a year after I joined the Corps, yeah," Deidara replied.

Sakura kissed him gently on the lips, guilt burning in her stomach. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to cause you so much pain by asking about your past, Deidara".

"It was my choice to tell you," he replied. "You can understand now why I never told you in Suna, yeah".

"Yeah," she answered softly. "I'm glad you did".

They shared a tentative smile and Sakura stretched out her hand for his. He took it and she led him inside away from the chill air that comes with the deepening night.

Sakura listened to the sound of Deidara cleaning his teeth as she poured another dose of the antidote into a glass still thinking about what he had told her. It seemed remarkable to her that he had suffered so much and yet could have turned out to be one of the most amazing people she had ever met. Of course, he had not come out completely unscathed. He angered easily, had trust issues and rebelled against any kind of authority. It struck her that she might be the only person ever to have heard this story from him. She wasn't sure where the confidence which inspired him to tell her about his past had come from but she was glad he had.

Deidara exited the bathroom and drained the glass she handed him. "Fuck!" he swore. "Never drinking this again after cleaning my teeth, yeah".

Sakura giggled and dodged past him to enter the bathroom. She changed into her usual comfy pyjamas and began to clean her teeth, not looking forward to spending another night sleeping on the hard wooden chair. She cleansed her face and re-entered the bedroom to find Deidara waiting expectantly.

"Are those little rabbits on your pyjamas?" He accused, holding back a snigger.

"They're very comfy," Sakura defended. "I've had them for years".

"I can tell," he smirked as she crossed over to the wooden chair. She picked up the pillow and the woollen blanket and attempted to arrange them into a comfy position on the chair.

"What are you doing, yeah?" Deidara asked, a hint of annoyance in his tone.

"Trying to make this chair comfortable," she replied as she pummelled the incredibly flat pillow into shape.

"Don't be stupid," he said. "There's a perfectly good bed over here, yeah".

"Are you sure?" she asked tentatively.

"You didn't have a problem getting in the bed last night, did you?"

"Alright," Sakura smiled as all traces of hesitation vanished. She awkwardly clambered into the bed, acutely aware of his hands around her waist and the soft kiss he placed on her forehead. She forced herself to relax despite the fact that every nerve in her body was tingling in anticipation and breathed in deeply, inhaling his masculine scent.

"Sakura?"

"Hmm?" She turned her head to face him, wondering as she did so when their fingers had become entwined. His eyes were dancing.

"I can't stand those bunnies, yeah," he smirked as his thumb traced small circles on her hand. "They've got to go".

She froze.

"Hey," he said, lifting her chin up gently to gaze into his eyes. "I wouldn't ask you to do anything you're not comfortable with, yeah. It's just," he gave a deep sigh. "It's really hot in here, yeah".

He pulled her into a one-armed hug as Sakura buried her head in his vest top. "You don't mind if I take my top off though, yeah?" He stroked her hair softly, wondering what had caused her to feel so insecure.

She shook her head wordlessly.

"You know you can talk about it, yeah".

"I know," came her soft reply. She sat up and the bed covers fell away. "Three years ago there was someone from back home, a teammate who I really liked. He left the village. I begged him to stay. When that failed, I asked to leave with him and I told him I loved him. But," she paused. "He thought that I was weak and would get in his way. I couldn't stop him from leaving".

"Sakura, I'm not going to leave you, yeah," Deidara hugged her tighter still, quashing the urge to hunt down the unknown man from her past and inflict grievous bodily harm upon him.

"Yeah," her voice shook in spite of the effort she took to keep it normal. She smiled and tried to convince him that everything was alright. Deidara might think he could keep his promise but Sakura knew better. For both of them to survive, he would have to break it.

"You know," she said, attempting to keep her tone light-hearted. "I think it is a little hot in here".

She shot him a bold, mischievous look, trying to inject some confidence in herself for what she was about to do. The medic took a deep breath and kicked off her pyjama bottoms and then nervously reached for the hem of her top. Her stomach was suddenly alive with snakes.

"Sakura," Deidara caught her hand. "Are you sure, yeah?"

"I am".

She gazed determinedly into his blue eyes as she ripped off the top, feeling naked without it. She resisted the urge to cover her breasts with her hands. Instead feeling emboldened, she pressed close against his body, enjoying the warmth of his skin against hers. "Beautiful, yeah," Deidara managed to murmur before Sakura's lips closed over his own. His hand reached up to caress her pale skin and she shuddered at the touch, drawing him deeper into the kiss.

He pushed her back onto the bed and broke the kiss momentarily to plant little butterfly kisses over her abdomen. She bit her lip as his tongue tickled her skin, trying to hold back the giggles as she squirmed unconsciously.

"So you're ticklish?" Deidara grinned, a devilish glint in his eye.

"Come here," Sakura smiled as she pulled him towards her for another kiss. He responded eagerly and she smirked inwardly, having successfully distracted him. She pulled on his lower lip teasingly as her hands ran through his long, blond hair and felt him smile into the kiss.

"I want to fuck you right now," he breathed into her ear, desire evident in his tone as his hand tightened on her left thigh. An intense longing pulsed through her and she quivered in anticipation.

"Do it," she whispered through a haze of desire, "I want to feel you inside me". She pressed herself up against him invitingly; she could feel his rock-hard erection through the thin material of his boxers. Deidara stiffened, as she knew he would. She bit her lip mischievously as he growled and pulled her closer still. She stared into his crystal-blue eyes and he into hers and they both knew it would not go that far tonight. Deidara didn't have to ask to know she was not ready and Sakura knew that he was still suffering from the after-effects of the poison, no matter how hard he tried to hide it. Still, she enjoyed pretending it would.

"Deidara?" Sakura asked later as they lay together on the bed, her head resting comfortably on his smooth torso. She traced a delicate finger over his abs as she spoke, a thoughtful expression on her face.

"Yeah?" His chest rumbled as he spoke, the vibrations spreading through her body.

"I want to do it," she said shyly. As she titled her head to look into his face, her cheek brushed against a fine layer of stubble.

"Do what, yeah?" Deidara mumbled sleepily, his arm around her bare shoulders. Sakura was glad that the darkness concealed her blush.

"I want to have sex with you," she said through gritted teeth, annoyed that she was having to spell it out to him.

He kissed her on the lips hungrily, all traces of sleepiness gone. "We could do it now," he said suggestively, reaching down to hook his finger over the edge of her lacy underwear. Sakura's breath hitched in her throat and her heart began to race.

Realising that she would have to be the sensible one, she wrapped her fingers around his hand and forced it to be still. "Deidara, we can't," she sighed, hating herself for passing up on the opportunity. "You need to get some rest. Your lungs are beginning to weaken again and I'm only making it worse". She raised her head from its position on his chest and slipped out of bed, wincing as her feet made contact with the ice-cold floor. She stumbled across to the table and poured out another dose of the antidote.

"You really need to sleep," she said with some consternation as she watched him consume the purple liquid wearily. He hurled the empty glass against the wall where it shattered into a thousand pieces.

"Deidara," she reached out to him haltingly but he turned away at her touch, disgusted and ashamed of his weak state. She silently slipped into bed beside him but made no move to touch him again. If she comforted him he would feel as though he was being pitied, something which he despised. No, she had learnt that he was better off left alone when one of his black moods took him.

She hugged herself silently, hoping that she could banish the thoughts that flew around her brain by sheer force of will. Deidara's frail state lay heavily on her heart. She knew he would never recover in time and only she knew what was waiting outside their secluded hut. The hut's illusion of safety was just that; an illusion. Deidara hadn't yet broached the topic of how they managed to elude the tracker shinobi. He knew as well as she did that he was in no fit state to travel. Maybe he preferred to live in ignorance rather than face the truth or perhaps he was just waiting for her to bring it up. A single tear trickled down her cheek.

How were they ever going to get through this?

* * *

**So, tell me what you think. Would you like to read an in-depth sex scene in the next chapter or would you prefer it if I didn't go into great detail? This chapter was a bit of an experiment.**


	15. Homecoming

**A/N:** Hello! I've made this chapter extra long to make up for the fact that this is the last chapter I will post for quite a while as I am starting an intense one-year course which means I'll have little time to update. Also I have changed this fic from a T rating to an M rating because of the nature of the last two chapters. Please review! I'd love to hear your thoughts!

**WARNING: This chapter contains M-rated scenes of a sexual nature.  
**

* * *

**Chapter 15: Homecoming**

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Morning arrived too quickly for the Akatsuki member. He squinted against the glare that filtered through the paper-thin windows and rolled over, intending to snuggle closer to Sakura but she was gone. Deidara opened his eyes blearily, confirming what he already knew. The only thing occupying the bed other than himself were some blankets and her pillow. Her side of the bed was cold, indicating that she had been gone for a while.

Deidara sighed and manoeuvred himself to the edge of the bed, acutely aware of his aching limbs. He rolled his shoulder to ease some of the tension, thinking all the while that though the antidote was working, it didn't stop him feeling like he'd been dragged through hell and back. Time for another dose of taste bud torture, he thought sarcastically as he ambled over to the sink and took a quick swig of the vile drink. Immediately, his thoughts felt clearer and as he finished the glass, his thoughts turned to Sakura.

Last night was - he ran his fingers through his hair distractedly - pretty damn amazing, he admitted. He remembered the sensation of running his hands over her silky-smooth, perfect skin, the taste of her mouth, the sight of her naked- Just the thought of it made him hard. He groaned as his hand snaked down his pants to grasp his hard length firmly. The tension was building up uncontrollably; he was desperate for release. A copy of Naughty Ninjas on top of a pile of old magazines caught his eye and he thumbed through it desperately, flicking past page after page of scantily clad blondes and brunettes but not one in over fifty pages had pink hair. The magazine fell to the floor as he lay on the confusion of blankets, pumping furiously. It was difficult to keep a picture of her in his head. He needed something visual - her - to focus on. Gradually the motion slowed as his need slipped away.

His frustration peaked as he gazed unseeing at the worm-eaten rafters. _I want to do it._ The words came unbidden to his mind and he turned over with a sigh. He remembered how nervous her admission had been. Had she meant it? He hoped so. Fuck, if she got his hopes up like that-

"Don't be such a fucking idiot, Deidara," he muttered to himself. Him and Sakura could never work, he reminded himself. She would have to sacrifice everything for him, spend the rest of her life looking over her shoulder. His clenched his fist so tightly that it left small indentation marks on his palm. He could never do that to her.

Suddenly, the room felt intensely claustrophobic. He had to get outside. Vibrations echoed through the floor as he headed towards the exit. The door squeaked angrily as he wrenched it open and was bathed in sunlight. He paused momentarily, inhaling the soft, sweet smell of pollen before hobbling down two cracked, wooden steps to the ground.

He started forward distractedly, blinking in the bright sunlight and almost collided with Sakura who was returning from the woods, arms laden with firewood.

"Hey, you're awake," she said brightly. His head jerked up, noticing her for the first time. Despite the easy smile she'd affixed to her face, Deidara could read the concern in her eyes. An unjustifiable stab of anger ripped through his stomach and he looked away, reluctant to have another repeat of the night before. And there was nothing to smash this time. He clenched his jaw irately, sick of being useless, a liability.

"Yeah," he managed to grunt, realising that she was waiting for his reply. He walked gingerly over to the log bench, not wanting her to witness how badly his frailty was affecting his ego. From somewhere behind him he heard an audible sigh. Choosing to ignore it, he rummaged around in his pocket for a spare piece of clay and began to play with it, transforming it first into a bird, then a spider, then a snake. As his hands worked the soft clay, he began to relax. His hands were almost as adept at shaping clay as the mouths inside them. It was second nature to him and the simple task served a purpose by calming his thoughts.

The log shifted slightly, alerting him to Sakura's presence as she joined him. He didn't look up. All his attention was focused on the tiny lump of clay in his hand as he shaped it over and over.

"Can you mould it into anything?" She breathed, sounding captivated.

Raising his head slightly, he was startled to see how close they were. Automatically he shrank back, having difficulty escaping from her heavenly vanilla-scented skin. The intoxicating emotions of several minutes ago had not quite dissipated and he was disinclined to satisfy them again so soon. He scowled, reluctant to indulge in what he considered to be pure fantasy, no matter what Sakura said. He had to pull himself together.

"I suppose so, yeah," he answered, faking nonchalance. "What shape would you like?"

"Er," she fidgeted slightly on her seat, perhaps sensing his unease. It was maddeningly endearing. "I'm not sure. You decide".

He squashed the miniature sting ray a split second before the pink tongue inhabiting the palm of his hand snatched it up eagerly. He glanced fleetingly at her face. She was watching the small mouth munch the clay with a rapt expression upon her features. Unconsciously she leaned in closer so that they were scant inches apart. His insides began to burn with a possessive need to take hold of her and sheer agony at the thought of what he could never have.

Slowly, he uncurled his fist to reveal a perfect replica of a cherry blossom, balanced steadily upon his palm.

"It's beautiful, Deidara," Sakura beamed, pulling him into a quick hug before he could even think about protesting. He hugged her back, his insides awash with conflicting emotions. Reluctantly he let go, torn between kissing her and pushing her away. "I'll make sure to keep this one," she continued, her smile as bright as the sun.

Something must have shown on his face because Sakura was studying him intently.

"What is it?"

He dropped his gaze, "it's nothing, yeah".

He heard her sigh as she rose from her position on the log, her back turned to him. "I thought we were being honest with each other".

He hated the disappointment in her tone. "You won't like it, yeah," he warned, wondering how he had caved so quickly.

"But it's something you need to say". It wasn't a question and there was no mistaking the determination in her tone.

"Sakura, I-," he ran his hand over his face distractedly, "It's not that I don't want to-".

"Deidara," she cut him off sharply, barely masking the agony in her voice. "I know," she said simply. And then she was in his arms, eyes glistening with emotion. "I know".

"Then you know why we can't-"

"I don't care," she whispered, clutching him like a life-line. An odd trickling sensation originated at the base of his neck, tickling his exposed skin. She was crying, he realised with some trepidation. All the words unspoken locked together in his throat and he wrapped his arms around her more tightly. He groaned internally. It was impossible to keep fighting her. It was selfish but he needed her; the thought of surviving without her was intolerable.

"I promise," he murmured, "never to leave you again". He kissed the top of her head softly.

"You'll have to," Sakura choked, eyes welling up with tears again. "We can't stay here".

In spite of the blazing sun towering overhead, Deidara felt an ice-cold chill dash down his spine. "What do you mean?" He gripped her shoulders painfully tight. "Tell me," he growled angrily.

"The night we arrived here, I thought we were safe," she began unsteadily. She twisted her fingers unconsciously. "I'd been so careful". She inhaled sharply. "Turns out, the only reason we even made it this far was because my sensei had been covering our tracks. He warned me that he would be able to hold them off for three days at the most. This is the second day," she finished dejectedly.

"Damn it, Sakura! Why didn't you tell me this sooner, yeah?"

He kicked a stone aside with unrestrained fury then began pacing back and forth like a winded rhinoceros.

"Deidara," she tried to placate him. "I didn't want you to worry. I've got this under control".

"Like hell you have!" He snarled, repressing the urge to shake some common sense into her. "I suppose you told him about us as well, yeah".

"No," she looked upset at his reaction. "I'm not stupid".

"Well it sure looks like it from here, yeah," he fumed, clenching his fingers rigidly as his palms itched with the need to explode something. "So this Konoha shinobi shows up, completely unconcerned about you healing me and tells you he can give you three days of peace before all hell breaks loose?"

"Not exactly," she muttered, shamefaced. "He hoped he could convince me to come back with him".

"Sakura," Deidara sighed, working hard to keep his temper under control at her idiocy. Although he was secretly pleased she'd decided to stay. "Why didn't you go?"

"Do you really need to ask that?" He flinched at the hurt in her voice. "I couldn't leave you. I l-". She stopped abruptly, apparently unable to go on. She ducked her head to hide her discomfort, her cheeks aflame.

"You should have gone," he told her tonelessly. "Now you've only condemned yourself along with me".

"No," Sakura disagreed, that determined, fiery look back in her eyes. "I will not let that happen," she said resolutely. "I know you don't believe you are worth saving but I know better".

He stared at her wonderingly. How could she articulate how he felt when he barely understood it himself?

"Sakura-"

Without warning she kissed him fiercely, biting his lower lip until it drew blood. The salty, metallic taste filled his mouth and he returned her kiss with equal enthusiasm. As his resolve crumbled, all the arguments circling his head faded into the background. They weren't important. What mattered was being in this moment, right now. He roamed her mouth possessively, in vain trying to satisfy an insatiable desire. He wanted her, now. In the middle of the clearing, on the soft springy grass.

One swift motion and her top lay crumpled on the floor. Instinctively, she pressed closer to him as a light breeze circled the clearing. She shivered and he ran his hand down her arm, feeling goose bumps. She closed her eyes at his touch, hands unrestrainedly exploring his chest through the thin fabric. A slight frown creased her brow and she seized the edge of his vest, mirroring his action. Instinctively, she moulded her lips against his for another mind-blowing kiss.

He marvelled at the power she so obliviously held over him. Recently, their arguments seemed to spark a frenzied reaction in them both. His hand wandered further up her thigh, approving of the short, black skirt that made access to her underwear that much easier. Her breath hitched as he ran a thumb over the flimsy, synthetic barrier that separated her from him. Smirking roguishly, he hooked a finger over the lining of her undies and teasingly tugged them a little lower.

She stared at him breathlessly, her eyes positively aglow with excitement and suspense. The white material adorned with a cute little bow symbolising her innocence, was dampening from anticipation. Curiously, he found the strictly virtuous lingerie arousing. In one bold stroke, the underwear was huddled around her knees. Much better.

Slowly he ran his thumb up and down the small bud of nerves located at the front of her pussy. He could feel her quiver as he circled it tantalisingly slow, heard her half-concealed gasp of surprise as heat flooded her body. She groaned softly and pressed into him as his hand fell into a rhythm. She was unravelling at his touch and it was mesmerising to watch.

A slight tugging at the top of his trousers and the unmistakable sound of a zip being undone brought him back to earth. Sakura eased him out of his trousers, catching his gaze with her provocative green eyes. She toyed with his boxers, fully aware of the effect she was having on him. His heart rate elevated as she traced the outline of his hard length through the inconvenient piece of material and the thought of her touching him was enough for him to want to take her there and then.

Two could play at that game.

He cupped her exposed breast with one hand, working and teasing the dusky pink nipple until it hardened satisfactorily. Sakura sucked in a harsh breath as he took it into his mouth. As he sucked on her nipple, he tugged at it gently causing her to arch with pleasure.

"Don't stop," Sakura begged, bringing her mouth up to capture his in another sweet-tasting kiss. Her hands wended their way unhurriedly down his torso and then slid his tight boxer shorts slowly over his ass, exposing his prominent erection. She ran her explorative fingers over his fully erect length nervously. It was clear she'd never done this before.

She began to pump her hand up and down his length, observing him silently as though trying to gauge his reaction. A soft groan escaped him as she grasped him more firmly, gradually increasing the speed at which her hand moved.

"Yes, just like that," he groaned, as the pleasure built up rapidly inside him. His breaths were rapid and shallow. If she continued much longer like this he was going to come but he didn't want to just yet.

He kissed her roughly, distracting her from what she was doing. Or who she was doing to be more exact. Their bodies were scant centimetres apart, allowing the soft skin of his penis to rest against her navel. Smiling, she wrapped her fingers around it once more.

"I'm not sure where this goes," she began, pointing his hard length towards her belly, "Here?" She moved it slowly towards her sex so it brushed up against it. "Or here?"

"Don't tempt me," he growled, pulling her in for another heady kiss, as his hands roamed her body with quiet urgency. It was becoming difficult to concentrate. If he wasn't careful he might do something really stupid like taking her there and then, in the heat of the moment forgetting that she was a virgin and that he needed to be gentle.

"Deidara," she whispered as she fondled his hard length. "I want you inside me now".

She gazed into his eyes pleadingly. She wanted this as much as he did.

"I know," his smirk hid his enthusiasm while his thoughts silently cried _me too!_

"Asshole," she said affectionately. Her words became a shriek as he scooped her up in his arms and carried her bridal-style into the cramped, musty cabin.

* * *

Sakura nuzzled her head closer to Deidara's bare chest, taking comfort in his strong, muscled arms which were wrapped possessively around her. She could hear his heart as it pounded out an erratic, frenzied tempo. Exactly how she imagined hers would sound right about now. Within moments they had passed into the shade of the cabin and onto the bed. He had angled himself so that he was above her, his fingers entwined with hers which were pinned against the pillow.

"Are you sure you want to do this, yeah?" he asked as he planted a soft kiss on her lips.

She nodded, determined to not show even the smallest sliver of doubt or she knew he would change his mind. As if to prove her point, she guided his hot, hard length towards her entrance. She could feel the tip of his penis pushing against her wet folds as her insides ached at the thought of him being inside her.

Carefully, he began to ease himself inside of her and she involuntarily bit her lip, withholding her sudden gasp of pain. He wasn't even that far inside of her and yet her insides were extremely tender. A fresh wave of pain hit as he shifted slightly.

"Fuck," she moaned, still accustoming herself to the strange sensation of him inside her. "Just stay still until I say so, okay?"

Deidara nodded tightly. She could tell that he was wondering if she was having second thoughts. Gingerly, she allowed herself to relax, trying to focus on something other than the throbbing of her sore flesh. First-time sex was not living up to her expectations. She realised now that it was unrealistic of her to expect it to be perfect when her body was so ill-accustomed to the experience. So far, her impression was that it was rather painful and awkward.

"You can move now," she said after a moment, hoping that the painful part was over.

"Tell me if it starts hurting again, yeah," Deidara answered.

He slowly began to move inside her, agitating her insides once more. Noticing her grimace, he said, "Try and relax, yeah. It will make it less painful".

She bit back a sharp retort, making a visible effort to relax as he eased himself fully inside her and began to move. In time, the pain faded into the background and the new sensation that was left behind each time he drew back and forth was not pleasurable but not unpleasant either. She began to move her hips in rhythm to his but it was difficult to keep in time when it felt so foreign. She felt like she was starting to get the hang of it when Deidara's thrusts began to get sharper and jerkier, as though he was beginning to lose control. Sakura groaned, knowing that he was going to come soon. She clung herself closer to him, lost in the primitive act as he came suddenly. She could feel the hot, wet liquid spurt inside her as he groaned, both their bodies trembling in the aftermath.

They clung to each other tiredly, hearts thumping wildly. Both were content to lie in silence, enjoying each other's company. Sakura lazily thought that - despite the uncomfortable beginning - she would like to do it again.

* * *

"Almost packed?" Deidara asked, unable to keep the tightness from escaping into his tone.

"Yes," Sakura said, dropping her backpack with a sigh as she saw the look on Deidara's face. She put her arms around him reassuringly. "You know it has to be done".

He inhaled in her scent as he hugged her tightly. Tears pricked at her eyes and she blinked them furiously away. She couldn't lose control now or she could never go through with it. Tiredly, she picked up a few spare bandages and packed them carefully back into her medical kit. It was a little past dawn and the sun had barely begun to peep intrusively through the curtained window. They had had sex once more since yesterday afternoon and Sakura's insides ached from the much more rough, frenzied love-making the second time round.

"I'm worried about you, yeah," he admitted quietly. "Something could go wrong and I won't be there to help you".

Sakura straightened up with a sigh. "That's exactly how I feel. At least I've told you what I'm going to do," she stared at him fixedly.

"Point taken," he gave her a small smile. "But it's better if your reactions are real, yeah".

"Please, Deidara-," she began but he cut off her protest with a quick kiss.

"I won't let anything happen to me, yeah," he murmured softly. "I promise".

Seeing as that was the best answer she was likely to receive, Sakura decided to drop the subject. Casting her mind around for another topic, she said conversationally, "Have you seen my underwear?"

"What?"

"My underwear from last night?" She expanded. "It should have been outside with the rest of my clothes".

"Sorry, no," he answered, avoiding her gaze as he passed over some medical utensils. "I'll make sure to let you know if I do, yeah".

"That's everything," she knelt back with a sigh, pushing her fringe out of her eyes as she zipped up the black backpack. She sat motionless, staring at the innocuous-looking bag quite unable to move.

"Sakura". She looked up to see Deidara holding out his hand, a strange expression playing on his face. "Come on".

She took it hesitantly, allowing herself to be pulled to her feet and guided out into the sunlight. Outside it was more difficult to ignore the dawn chorus; small birds, big birds, brightly coloured birds, birds of what felt like practically every species imaginable were chirping joyously; the exact antithesis of Sakura's turbulent emotions. Because yelling at the stupid little creatures would gain nothing, she used the opportunity to drink in Deidara's features. To memorise the exact shape of his face, the sky-blue colour of his eyes, his very kissable lips. She noticed the way his mouth tightened at the thought of saying goodbye, his eyes displayed a number of emotions - pain, longing, sadness, fear and perhaps love? - she cast her eyes down at the floor unable to look much longer.

"I can't do this". There she had said it. Unbidden, a couple of tears slid down her cheeks. She rubbed them away angrily. She had promised herself that she wouldn't cry.

"You have to". Now it was his turn to comfort her. He wrapped her in his arms as though he would never let go, wishing for their situation to be different; a place where neither of them had to run or make sacrifices, somewhere where they could stay together indefinitely. Sakura tightened her grip on him and buried her face in his vest top, unable to hold back the torrent of tears as her body shook uncontrollably. "Everything will be alright," he said. Sakura knew he was trying to convince himself as much as her. "It will all be okay, yeah".

She screwed up her eyes, wishing it to be true. Her yearning was so strong that she almost believed it for one short-lived moment. And then she came crashing back down.

"Yeah, you're right," she forced herself to say. This was harder than she had ever imagined it would be. Her heart felt literally like it was broken - not into two, but millions of fragmented pieces that stabbed unrelentingly at her chest. It was almost unbearable but she had to keep up the pretence that she was fine. She couldn't let him see her this way.

"Will we see each other again?" She had to ask as her voice trembled and almost broke.

"Yes," he said, stroking her pink hair comfortingly. "Of course we will. As soon as it is safe to do so, I will contact you, yeah".

"Good," Sakura felt marginally better. "Remember to take your medicine twice a day," she reminded him. "Take it for the next week just to be safe".

"I will," he promised. He lifted her chin gently, capturing her mouth in his for one last kiss. It was different from all the others. It tasted of desperation and longing. Both were unwilling to break the kiss, not knowing when they would ever get the chance to do so again. Eventually they broke apart. Sakura's lips felt slightly swollen from the intense, prolonged kiss.

"Don't linger," Deidara warned her as she made to leave. She nodded, not trusting herself to speak. At the edge of the clearing she turned back.

"Deidara, please be careful".

He smiled, a heart-stopping, sunlit smile. "You be careful too, yeah".

A light breeze picked up, mingling Sakura's tears with her unruly hair as she walked away from the clearing. Her last moments with Deidara kept replaying inside her head and her heart contracted painfully. When would she see him again?

* * *

In a trance-like state Sakura made her way slowly through the trees, focusing on placing one foot in front of the other. One at a time. Her dry eyes felt sore from the steady trickle of tears that had crept unbidden down her cheeks. She felt curiously wrung out, unable to cry any longer even if she had wanted to. She supposed that this was a good thing. They were bound to pick up her trail soon. All she had to do was keep walking in one direction. And sure enough-

"Stop right there!" An invisible voice commanded from the trees. Sakura froze and lifted her hands warily, indicating that she was not going to attack them. "Stay still," the unknown voice said harshly as a group of Suna shinobi - damn, she was hoping it would be Konoha - surrounded her. She recoiled slightly, reading the hostility in their faces. Perhaps this was going to be harder than she thought.

"Where is the Akatsuki scum?" One asked her ruthlessly as he shoved his way to the forefront of the crowd and rested a kunai against her throat. "Answer me, traitor".

"I don't know what has gone on in my absence but I am not a traitor," Sakura replied vehemently, ignoring the frantic thudding of her heart. "I came here of my own free will. I left _him_ in an abandoned cabin a few miles from here, too weak to move".

"I don't trust you," the commander snarled disbelievingly. "You have three minutes to explain yourself. There had better be a good explanation for this".

"Firstly," Sakura ground out. "You do not have the authority to decide what to do with me. That rests solely with the Hokage and whoever is representing the leader of this expedition. Furthermore my actions were based on purely medical reasons," Sakura continued, outwardly calm but inside feeling sick with fear. "The poison Sasori used is very rare, I was trying to procure an antidote".

"Your antidote is useless. Sasori is dead," the commander replied. "Elder Chiyo killed him".

Sakura blinked in surprise. She hadn't counted on Sasori being dead. She felt a pang of sympathy for the old lady. She couldn't imagine how hard that would have been on her.

"You need to talk to her," Sakura insisted, pushing the kunai away. "She ordered me to leave in the first place".

This was not strictly true, but she was running out of options and she was sure the old woman wouldn't sell her out.

"Chiyo is dead," the commander said, for the first time sounding a little unsure. "It sounds like there has been a misunderstanding here. Lead us to the Akatsuki member and we will sort this out later".

Sakura nodded, feeling curiously numb. She had liked the elderly woman and her quirky ways, her bright eyes which had seemed to understand what she was feeling better than anyone else had. It was hard to believe that she was gone.

She led the way back through the towering trees, hoping Deidara had enough of a head start. It wasn't part of their plan for her to return to the cabin. Anxiety settled in the pit of her stomach; he had made it explicitly clear that she should not return. Feeling uneasy, she stole a quick glance at her companions whose expressions were grim. Attempting to convince them not to go seemed like a bad idea. It would cast even greater suspicion over her actions of the past few days. They would think she was covering for the enemy.

One mile out from the cabin a deafening blast rent the air, causing the trees to whip back alarmingly as the force of the explosion threatened to rip them from their roots. Taken by surprise, Sakura was too slow in summoning chakra to anchor her to the ground. The sudden wind caught her in its clutches like a rag doll and threw her against a tree. There was a sickening crack as her body connected with the smooth trunk but nothing seemed to be broken, she surmised as she checked her body for signs of damage. The extreme wind had died down as quickly as it came and nobody seemed to be hurt - except for the tree which was hanging at an awkward angle, splinters pointing feebly at the sky.

She frowned. A tinny buzzing had infected her ears and she could no longer hear the sound of her own breathing or anything else for that matter.

"Are you hurt?" A Sand shinobi mouthed. When she shook her head, he pointed to the ridge in the distance where the line of trees abruptly ended. The message was clear. _We need to go._

Sakura rose unsteadily to her feet as the shinobi sped off into the distance, fighting the unrestrained panic that clawed at her throat. Throwing all caution to the wind, she streaked off after the receding group of men, only aware that she was crying when she felt her cheeks go damp. He'd promised her that nothing would happen to him, that everything would be okay. Deidara wouldn't have broken his promise to her, would he? He had to be alive. He had to! It was all she could do not to scream his name.

Her footsteps involuntarily slowed as she reached the edge of the crater. It must have been a mile wide. The blast had obliterated the hut in which they'd slept together, the shower block, the camp fire, the clearing and the surrounding trees. There was no evidence that any of it had happened at all. She choked back a sob. It was impossible to tell whether Deidara had been in the blast at all and in any case, she couldn't bring herself to check. She wouldn't go down there.

Slowly she sank onto the ground, clutching her knees as her tears left salty trails on her face.

"If I don't hear from him, then I'll know," she whispered to herself, the buzzing preventing her from hearing the words that left her mouth but she said them anyway more to conserve the remains of her sanity than anything else. "He promised that he would stay in touch".

That was her sole comfort, her one hope. She gazed unseeing at the place where she had said goodbye to Deidara less than an hour before. It felt so surreal. She wished now that she'd told him she loved him. She dug her nails into the soft dirt angrily, thinking about how readily she had believed him, of how naive she had been.

She watched a small, grey bird flutter to the ground a few feet away upon the fresh, upturned soil. Though she barely moved, the bird seemed aware of her presence. Bright, intelligent eyes observed her steadily. She couldn't put her finger on it, but the bird seemed familiar to her somehow.

She leapt to her feet as the bird took to the air suddenly. "Hey, wait," she called but it was already gone. It could have been a product of wishful thinking but Sakura could have sworn that the bird was made of clay.

Heavy footsteps alerted her to the fact that she was no longer alone. Belatedly, she realised her hearing must be returning. Wiping her expression blank, she looked up into the face of one of the sand shinobi.

"Are you alright?" He sounded concerned.

She gestured hopelessly at the muddy wasteland before her.

"That could have been me," she lied. It seemed the right thing to say.

He nodded understandingly. As the other shinobi returned, she let herself be led away back towards their camp, unable to help but nurse the small bud of hope that blossomed inside her.

* * *

"Sakura!" She kept her head down, allowing herself to be guided through the camp, accompanied by ominous muttering from a group of onlookers. "Sakura!" The urgent voice called again, worry seeping into his tone as his attempts failed to get a response from the despondent-looking medic. She wished he would stop; his shrill cries were exacerbating her oncoming headache.

"What happened?" She winced at his shout, accidentally spotting him in the crowd as he tried to force his way past two very surly looking shinobi. She dropped her head again quickly, focusing on the trampled earth.

The route by which she was being escorted led to the Kazekage's magnificent orange tent. Vaguely, she wondered who was waiting for her behind those light and dark patterned orange flaps. She fought hard to control her erratic, panicked thoughts and keep her breathing even. It was crucial for her to appear innocent, merely misguided in her attempts to find a cure for Deidara.

"Wait," Sakura looked up instinctively at the sound of her sensei's authoritative voice. "I must insist on accompanying Sakura inside this tent. She is my student".

With a fierce rush of hope, she saw that they had no choice but to agree. Kakashi fell into step next to the medic, his eyes fixed resolutely ahead. She had half-hoped for his eye to crinkle reassuringly into a smile however there were too many watching to risk an exchange. Kakashi and Sakura entered the tent alone, acutely aware of the increased number of guards posted outside.

Woven, patterned rugs carpeted the floor of the tent while brightly coloured tapestries adorned the walls. Glancing upwards, Sakura noticed an ornate, bronze lantern hanging from the ceiling which cast dark shadows about the room. At the far end of the tent a figure dressed in black and with a shock of red hair had his back turned to them.

A poorly concealed gasp escaped her lips upon identifying the red-haired stranger. "Gaara?" she choked.

"Yes," the man in question affirmed coldly, turning to fix his penetrating gaze upon her. Dark shadows ringed his eyes and his face was paler than usual.

"But how-?" Her mind was in free-fall. Gaara dead and broken in the cave, the life sucked out of him. Gaara standing in front of her, alive and well.

"Elder Chiyo used a very high level jutsu to bring me back to life," Gaara explained. "Unfortunately it requires so much power that it claims the user's life in the process. Chiyo should never have had to make that sacrifice". He settled down onto a red and gold couch with a sigh.

"You have put me in a very difficult position, Sakura," he said sternly. "My men have already informed me that you gave yourself up, of your own free will but there is still the matter that you defied your superiors and helped a known fugitive. Explain yourself".

"When the enemy was hit with a poisoned dart, I saw it as an opportunity," Sakura twisted her fingers unconsciously. "The poison was fast-acting and unique, a potential danger to the whole of our camp if an antidote could not be found. I knew then what I must do". She drew herself up straighter. "As the sole medic, I made a judgement call. It seemed at the time to be the logical route".

"If I may, Kazekage-sama," Kakashi interrupted. "This was Sakura's first mission as the lead medic on a team. She made a mistake yes, but she only ever had our best interests at heart".

"And what would you have done with the Akatsuki if you had found a cure?" Gaara asked her. His hands formed a steeple as he leaned forward in his seat contemplatively.

"There was never any danger," Sakura replied. "If a cure had been found, he would have been too weak to pose any threat unless I administered copious amounts and allowed him to regain his strength. I never intended on letting him live".

"Clearly your calculations were a little out, Haruno," Gaara ground out. "He had the strength to create a massive explosion, almost resulting in the deaths of some of my best shinobi".

"I am sorry," she feigned remorse, staring woodenly at the floor. "I didn't know that would happen".

"Luckily for you, that was pretty obvious," Gaara growled. "I have informed your Hokage and she will decide what the repercussions of your little stunt will be".

"Thank you, Kazekage-sama," Sakura bowed and allowed herself to be escorted from the tent.

* * *

The dirty, cracked mirror hung on the wall of the derelict room reflecting the lumpy mattress which sagged unattractively in the middle, the cheap desk and chair and a pale, sorrowful young woman who appeared to be scrutinising herself in the mirror with a frown.

Sakura sighed despairingly. The borrowed black dress was definitely a little large in the bust which unfortunately gave off the illusion of her having no figure whatsoever. But the funeral was tonight. There was no time to rush out and find something more suitable. Her frown deepened as she began to pin up her pink hair carefully.

There was a knock at the door.

"Hurry up, we need to be there soon," Naruto whined through the keyhole. "How long does it take to put on a stupid dress anyway?"

He at least, didn't seem perturbed by the appalling state of their accommodation. Clearly a snub from the Kazekage, they told that these were the only rooms available and they could either take it or leave it. Sakura suspected the others wouldn't have been included if they hadn't defended her so fiercely on the torturous three day journey back to Suna, but she was grateful they had.

"I'll be out in a minute," Sakura replied through a mouthful of hair grips. Privately, she hoped to drag it out as long as possible for she had no desire to attend the event and if her attendance wasn't mandatory, she wouldn't have bothered going at all. She lightly applied some foundation and mascara and took one last glance in the mirror. It wasn't fantastic, but it would have to do.

The streets were surprisingly dark as Sakura, Kakashi and Naruto exited the poor excuse for a hotel and wandered down the meandering streets towards the centre of the village. The streets were not yet empty; it appeared they weren't the only latecomers. As they neared the village centre, they joined the immense throng of people that clustered around the square. A brilliant blaze was lit at the centre which cast an orange glow over everything. Huge tongues of flame leapt up into the darkened sky as though trying to touch the stars.

A raised, white plinth had been erected before the huge bonfire upon which rested a white, marble block where the body of Kankuro lay. Over half the village was in attendance to pay their last respects to the Kazekage's brother. Though the night was warm, a shiver ran down her spine. A part of her still harboured the notion that she could have saved him if she had reached him in time. She felt distinctly uncomfortable.

An invisible hush fell over the crowd as a lone figure ascended the platform. Even from this distance Sakura had no difficulty recognising him. Gaara began to speak but Sakura was too far away to hear properly. Phrases like "the most generous, kind brother anyone could ask for", "pure of heart", "always valued loyalty", "the likes of which we'll never see again" borne on the wind floated back to her. She lowered her gaze and stared at the forest of legs before her, unseeing.

She should have been thinking of Kankuro, she knew. But instead, her thoughts were drawn irrevocably towards Deidara. She felt hollow inside. It was as though he had taken the best parts of her with him and she was left with an empty, broken shell of a heart as recompense. The more she dwelled on it, the more certain she became that he was alive. She wrapped her arms around her chest as though to ward off the oncoming breeze but in reality it felt as though she was falling to pieces. He had promised her that they would see each other again. She had to hold onto that thought. It was the one thing that stopped her from having a complete melt down.

After the funeral she all but ran back to the flea-infested hotel, relaxing only when she heard the lock click in place. In the last few days Sakura had become an expert at dodging her inquisitive and concerned teammates. For the duration of the journey home, she had made sure always to be in the company of others so that her friends wouldn't catch her alone and force her into a conversation she was not ready to have. She couldn't explain anyway so why bother wasting her breath?

"Sakura!" Naruto banged on the door, furiously. "Open the door!"

Her only response was to bury herself further under the covers.

"Why won't you talk to us?" He shouted urgently through the door. "We know something is wrong".

"Naruto". Sakura straightened up at the sound of her sensei's voice. Their footsteps retreated further down the hall but by concentrating, she could hear everything they said. "If she was going to open the door, she would already have done so".

Sakura imagined Naruto's blue eyes frown in confusion as Kakashi laid a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"But-"

"She will tell us when she is ready, Naruto," Kakashi cut across him. "Until then just let her be".

She heard the blond-haired shinobi slump against the wall in defeat. His voice sounded muffled when he spoke again. Perhaps he was talking to his knees? "It's just that I've never seen Sakura this way before," Naruto said despondently. "She never laughs anymore, or smiles. I sometimes catch her staring off into the distance with a really sad look in her eye. It's like she's not even Sakura anymore, you know".

Inside the bedroom, Sakura winced, stung by those last words. By continuing to act this way, she was only hurting her those who cared about her. She had no idea that her behaviour was such a cause for concern. From now on, she would endeavour never to let her friends witness her pain again.

She focused on the conversation again, aware that what she was doing was not wise but she couldn't help herself.

"-mission affected her greatly and it's not fair to judge when we don't know what happened," Kakashi answered, a hint of concern in his tone. "She is stronger than you think. She will get through this".

"Yeah," Naruto answered. "It's just I'm really worried about her. I'm afraid of losing another teammate".

"That won't happen," Kakashi said firmly. "Stop worrying and go to sleep. She'll be fine".

Their footsteps faded away down the hall and Sakura heard two distant doors bang. She hugged her pillow tightly and hoped that Kakashi was right because right now she felt like she'd never be fine again.

* * *

A few days after the funeral and Sakura found herself well on the way home. She was glad to leave the hot, swirling desert sands behind and the village's caustic attitude. The village was a stark reminder of the time when she was commissioned to heal Deidara for interrogation and the influx of memories made her loath to leave her hotel room for any length of time. It was too painful.

The familiar gates of Konoha appeared on the horizon. She was returning to the village a different person. What had happened in the dusty, stifling cell and the wooden hut in the forest had changed her in ways she couldn't begin to explain. Instead of relief at the sight of her village after a long mission, she felt a vague sense of anticipation. Deidara had promised her they would see each other again. She believed him. Maybe in a week or a month or two, Deidara would slip into the village and knock on her door. It would be as though no time had passed at all. A few quick steps and she would be wrapped tightly in his embrace. Nothing would ever come between them again.

She couldn't have known that it would be a full year before she heard from him again.

* * *

**Please review! Let me know what you think :)**


	16. Little Acts of Selfishness

_A/N: Don't worry guys. Deidara will return! I'd like to thank Raven n pink for spurring me on to write this chapter with her lovely review! I wrote this pretty much in a day so I hope it lives up to expectations and please don't kill me for what happens! Happy reading and please review! It really does make a difference!_**  
**

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

* * *

**Chapter 16: Little Acts of Selfishness**

* * *

With a sigh, Sakura pushed some unruly strands of hair from her eyes and attempted to focus again on the sample through the microscope. Her right hand was poised above the notepad - ready to scribble down her observations - while her left twiddled with the dial expertly. The infected cells magically came into focus and almost instantaneously her hand began to skate across the paper, documenting their properties.

Bang!

"Ouch!" Sakura looked over the top of her microscope for the source of the commotion, rubbing her very aggrieved eye.

The doors to the lab were still swinging dangerously as a dark-haired woman approached her briskly, a clipboard in one hand.

"Ah, so this is where you've been hiding," Shizune sounded relieved. "I must have searched the whole hospital top to bottom. If I didn't know better I'd have thought you came here to avoid company".

"Just yours," Sakura grinned, closing the notebook with a snap. "So, what do you need me for?"

"We're a little short on staff. Three more people phoned in sick today, leaving us with less than half of our usual number of medics," she broke off as a sudden fit of coughing racked her body.

"Are you sure you should be at work?" Sakura asked, concerned. "You can take a day off once in a while you know".

Shizune brushed her protestations aside with one hand. Sakura jerked her lips up into a non-committal smile and quickly dropped her gaze, recognising too late the concerned look on the dark-haired woman's face. It was a look she'd been on the receiving end of a lot recently. Perhaps people were afraid she was relapsing. She wondered if her friends ever discussed her when they frequented the bar. The thought made her uncomfortable.

She glanced up to find Shizune had circumnavigated the table separating them. Tension welled in her gut. Her stance was rigid but her eyes pleaded with Shizune to remain silent. She didn't think that she could take another round of the inquisition today.

"And what about you Sakura?" Shizune's voice seemed a great distance away. "You spend more time down here than any other member of staff. You seem distant and reserved and sometimes you get this look on your face..." She trailed off awkwardly.

Sakura swallowed. She knew Shizune meant well but her problems were her own. The very nature of her problems ensured that she couldn't share them with anyone even if she wanted to.

"I'm fine," she said. The lie sounded more convincing with each passing month which she had to admit frightened her a little. What if there came a day when even she wouldn't be able to tell the difference anymore?

"Sakura-," Shizune protested, instinctively reaching out to touch the girl's arm. Sakura flinched.

"The clipboard please," she stated acidly.

The older woman's shoulders slumped forward in resignation as she handed the clipboard over. Sakura didn't know whether to be pleased or not that Shizune had given up on her so quickly. Six months ago, she would have fought harder. It seemed like everyone had given up on her. Well, everyone but one.

"Room sixteen," Shizune said tonelessly. "Patient has multiple lacerations to the chest and second degree burns".

Sakura nodded, flicking through the pages attached clipboard with a sigh.

"There is one more thing," the dark-haired medic began tentatively. Sakura's eyes flicked to the older woman's face, full of reluctance and self-loathing. "There's been a few complaints from some of the patients. They say that your bedside manner is rather distant and impersonal. I am afraid I have to agree. You will have six weeks to show improvement. I'm so sorry Sakura," she finished apologetically.

"It's fine. I understand". Her voice quavered and threatened to break. "If you will excuse me...".

Her eyes stung as she exited the room as fast as her legs could carry her without actually running. She heard a shout behind her as the heavy wooden doors shut behind her and suddenly she was running. She didn't stop until she reached a deserted corridor on the fifth floor and angrily wiped her traitorous tears away. She hoped Shizune hadn't noticed. That would be sure to start another bout of questions because Sakura didn't cry. She hadn't cried in a long time.

"What is wrong with me?" She asked the silent corridor. There was no reply. _What did you expect? _She told herself bitterly. _Your social life is a disaster. Is it that unreasonable to imagine that your work life is falling to pieces too? Most of the time you can't even look people in the eye. People want compassion and warmth, something that you cannot offer them. Maybe once you could have been a good medic, but now..._

"What should I do?" she asked miserably.

"Well for a start you can get your lazy bum off the floor, forehead," a very familiar voice answered back. Sakura twisted around to find her best friend in her florists uniform looking down at her disgustedly. "What the hell do you think you are doing, Sakura? This is beyond pathetic".

The blonde held out her hand and Sakura allowed herself to be hoisted off the ground. "What are you doing here Ino?" She asked in disbelief, staring at the floral uniform. "Shouldn't you be working?"

"I could ask the same of you," Ino replied grimly. Sakura didn't reply. "Shizune called me," she said by way of explanation. "She was worried about you".

"Yeah her and the rest of the world," Sakura muttered under her breath.

Ino shot her a sharp look. "You know, I expected better of you Sakura. She's just looking out for you. We all are! Everyone has tried to be understanding and give you time in the hope that you'll move on from this but I know better. What you need is the truth, not mollycoddling".

"I don't really need to hear this," Sakura mumbled, attempting to wrench her arm from Ino's vice-like grip.

"Yes you do," Ino shook her fiercely. They were almost at the lobby to the hospital now. "I know what happened to you Sakura".

"No you d-"

"You were raped, weren't you?" Ino said softly in a tone that held total conviction.

"What?" Sakura was aghast. "No I never-, that's not-," she stumbled over the words. "I wasn't raped!" She glared at her friend. A few people further down turned at her outburst. She closed her eyes, wishing the ground would swallow her up as her face turned crimson.

"Okay, I believe you," Ino said slowly, confusion knitting her brow. "I just don't understand-"

"I'm not asking you to," she ground out.

"Point taken," Ino sighed wearily. It appeared as though she had run out of bullets, for now. "Please don't start shouting again but I ran into your boyfriend on the way here and he's waiting in the lobby".

"He's not my boyfriend," Sakura snarled as her mind jumped unbidden to the very person whom she had once hoped to be her boyfriend.

"Okay whatever," Ino seemed tired of arguing. "Please don't take your anger out on him though. He seems really worried about you. I swear that boy is in love with you or something".

Sakura's stomach clenched uncomfortably at Ino's parting words. They had a ring of truth to them which made her uneasy. It was ridiculous to stand in the corridor outside the lobby forever so she took a deep breath, willing herself to stay calm and entered.

The pale green waiting area was so overcrowded with patients coughing and spluttering into grubby tissues and children running about or playing with the building blocks that for a moment Sakura didn't see him. Then she spied him near the entrance, leaning casually against the smooth mahogany reception desk watching the commotion before him.

"Kaito". The dark-haired man turned and smiled when he saw who it was. It took her a moment to realise that she was smiling back. Without warning he wrapped his arms around her in a big bear hug.

"Are you ok?" His deep voice rumbled in his chest. Sakura nodded as she disentangled herself from him. He was at least a head taller than her and she felt strangely at a disadvantage as she stared up into his caring, compassionate brown eyes. _I swear that boy is in love with you._

"Ino shouldn't have told you," Sakura sighed, widening the gap between their bodies as she stepped back a pace. "You have problems of your own. It's not fair of her to involve you in all of this".

"Ah, don't be mad," Kaito replied as they walked out into the weak autumn sunlight. "I don't mind. She did what she thought was right".

"Yeah I know," Sakura conceded, shivering slightly as a gust of wind swirled around them, blowing red and orange leaves across their path. Kaito's sharp eyes missed nothing.

"You didn't bring a coat did you?" He said in accusatory tones, disappointment clearly visible on his face. When she didn't reply he shrugged off his charcoal grey winter coat and draped it around her bare shoulders. She felt dwarfed by its size and had half a mind to return it to him but she _was_ cold. "What would you do without me?"

"Freeze apparently," Sakura replied. "But thanks," she said grudgingly. They wandered down the nearly deserted streets, heads bowed against the oncoming gale and eyes screwed up against the flurries of grit that swirled down the narrow alleyways. She glanced anxiously at Kaito, hoping that her little act of selfishness was not causing him to shiver from the cold. Sensing her gaze, he flashed her an encouraging smile which she did not return. A violent gust of wind hurtled down the alleyway and he involuntarily shuddered. His thin navy blue jumper was not designed to withstand this kind of weather she realised guiltily. She was not quite ready to face home alone yet and one of the things that she loved about spending time with Kaito was that he never plied her with questions. Perhaps that was why they got on so well.

Suddenly she knew that this little act of selfishness was not going to be the last. A bar lay conveniently across the street. Blindly she walked towards it driven by a sudden, overwhelming impulse to drink away her sorrows. Kaito would follow, she knew. He always did.

"Sakura, wait," Kaito had grabbed hold of her arm, jerking her to her senses. "I don't think that's a good idea".

"Okay, so what do you want to do?" she crossed her arms impatiently. "We don't have to drink alcohol, we could get a lemonade or a coke. Besides," she smiled, "don't you recognise the name of this bar?"

"The Loft. It was where we first met," he replied half a beat later. "If it means that much to you I guess we can go in". He sounded uncertain.

"You don't have to worry about me," Sakura said reassuringly. "I'm sick of everyone worrying about me all the time. I want to be treated like a normal person. Please, Kaito".

It was the plea upon her lips that shattered his determination. His eyes softened at her admission and he said quietly, "okay". His hand found hers and gave it an encouraging squeeze. As they walked into the bar she felt the comfortable weight of his arm around her waist and felt her conscience twinge horribly. It was wrong of her to allow him to get so close but she always felt better in his company.

As he collected drinks from the bar, she kicked off her tiny black dolly shoes and put her feet as close to the crackling fire as she dared. She closed her eyes, basking in the warmth of the flames. This she could get used to. Two glasses clinked as they were placed on the square wooden table. Reluctantly she opened her eyes.

"Comfortable?" Kaito asked amusedly, his dark eyes dancing.

"Yes, very," she replied, stretching out and moving her feet away from the fire not one metre away, "but unfortunately I don't want to risk burning my feet".

"Ah, so you do have some sense left," Kaito teased. "I was a little worried for a while back there".

"Are you sure it isn't yourself that you should be worried about?" Sakura countered, grinning wickedly. "I distinctly remember your run-in with the microwave a few weeks ago".

"Hey," he raised his hands up in mock protest, "we promised never to mention that again".

"I forgot," she grinned, trying and failing to look contrite. "It would never have happened if you'd bothered to read the instruction manual". Her eyes fell upon the glass in front of her. "Water. Really Kaito?"

"I figured it would be safer than you and tequila," he deadpanned.

"Yeah probably," Sakura answered, remembering the night almost a year ago when they first met.

* * *

**One Year Earlier**

"Okay, who's up for another round?" Sakura announced to the group squashed into a corner booth at The Loft. The tiny bar was doing a roaring trade that night. It was practically overflowing with intoxicated, uninhibited people clustered around the bar, occupying the seats or dancing in what little free space the place had to offer.

"Definitely," Ino slurred from the corner curled up with her man of the moment, while Naruto and Lee nodded enthusiastically. Shikamaru silently shook his head before lapsing into his brooding state.

"Um," Hinata whispered. "I- I don't think-"

"Great," Sakura grinned, overriding Hinata's stammers. "That's seven tequilas coming up".

She traversed the packed room, almost stumbling into a table on her way to the bar. A firm hand gripped her arm enabling her to regain her balance. She thanked the handsome stranger with brown hair and continued shakily across the room, her killer heels threatening to throw her off balance. She giggled as she held out her hands to steady herself. She felt like she was walking across a tightrope.

"Seven shots of tequila please," she said to the barman as she gripped the sides of the counter to stay steady and tried to look like she wasn't fucked out of her mind. No doubt due to the crush of bodies occupying the room, Sakura felt hot and sweaty. She wished she had opted for a more suitable attire tonight; her dress was too tight and it stuck uncomfortably to her skin.

"You look hot," a voice said to her left, startling her out of her own little world. She turned clumsily to see the man who had rescued her from falling a few minutes ago. He had dark, penetrating brown eyes, brown hair that fell lazily over his face and a strong jaw line she noted detachedly. "Are you sure you are ok? You look like you are going to faint".

"I know what your game is and I'm not going anywhere with a pervert like you," Sakura snarled, "leave me alone".

Surprise crossed the guy's face. Evidently he wasn't expecting such hostility. The man at the bar chose that moment to return and started depositing her shots on the counter. She shielded them with her arms, afraid that this pervert might take it into his head to spike one.

"Are those all for you?" He asked, a hint of something in his tone that she couldn't quite recognise.

"No," she shot back defensively. "I'm here with friends".

"What's going on here?" Naruto arrived in the nick of time, blue eyes surveying the scene concernedly. "Who is this guy? Is he bothering you?"

"Yes," Sakura ground out angrily, pushing her sticky fringe out of her face. "I've asked him to leave but he won't. He wanted me to go outside with him".

Naruto's eyes narrowed. "No, you've got it all wr-," the guy began to argue.

"You need to leave," Naruto growled, wrapping his arm protectively around Sakura's shoulder. Without a backward glance they turned around and began to make their way back to their seats, awkwardly cradling the shot glasses in their hands.

"Naruto," Sakura suddenly whispered, feeling faint. "It's really hot in here. I think I need to sit down," she finished apologetically.

"Here?" Naruto said disbelievingly. "We'll be at the booth in a minute, can't you wait?"

"No, I need to sit down now," she insisted, grabbing a spare chair and sagging gratefully into it.

Naruto was saying something but her head was spinning and she didn't understand. She closed her eyes and attempted to control her breathing; in and out, in and out. She could taste bile in her throat as nausea rolled over her in threatening waves.

"You'll be ok for one minute, Sakura?" Naruto asked her anxiously. "I'm going to tell the others we're leaving". She nodded and then stopped because the motion was making her head spin. The crowd swallowed him up within moments. Tiredly, she shut her eyes again and listened to the roar of noise around her. She wanted to go home.

"Sakura".

Naruto had brought the others with him. She groaned. Now all of them had witnessed her drunken moment. Thanks Naruto, thanks a lot. She allowed herself to be hoisted to her feet and steered out of the bar. "Troublesome," Shikamaru muttered from behind her. A few choice swear words threatened to roll off her tongue but somehow she resisted. Completely embarrassed by this point, she allowed herself to be led through the door. The instant the cool night air wafted over her, Sakura realised she'd made a terrible mistake. The nausea she'd felt inside was nothing to how she felt now. Her stomach roiled as she pushed herself away from Naruto and lurched towards the nearest alley.

She was glad Ino and Naruto stayed with her for the worst part. Naruto kept letting some strands of her hair fall while he held it back and Ino kept complaining that she'd ruined her perfectly good opportunity for some meaningless sex but Sakura didn't care. Her friends had stayed with her and for that she was grateful. It's only when a friend stays with you through the good and the bad that you know they are a true friend because it's those moments when you truly need someone that matters the most.

"Thanks guys," she said weakly when it was all over.

"No problem," Naruto said at exactly the same time Ino said, "you'd better not make a habit of this Haruno".

"I won't," she promised. She got to her feet slowly, still feeling the after effects of what had just transpired. "I don't ever want to drink again".

Ino and Naruto exchanged knowing glances. "Let's just get you home," her friend suggested.

They had barely taken twenty steps when a group of people including the guy she'd met at the bar exited the Loft.

"Is she okay?" He asked, concerned. Having sobered up a little she thought that he didn't really come across as a pervert after all. He had just been looking out for her she realised with some chagrin.

"Yeah, we're taking her home now," Naruto said icily, irritated that this brown-haired idiot was approaching them _again_. "You enjoy the rest of your night".

* * *

"Not one of your finer moments," Kaito smirked at the memory."You never did say why you let yourself get into such a state in the first place".

"Memories," Sakura swirled the water in her glass aimlessly. There was no way for Kaito to know but when they met at the bar a year ago it had been the six month anniversary of her returning to Konoha after _that_ mission. She had received no news of him for six long months and had started to think that maybe he didn't want her any more. What if he'd never wanted her in the first place? A night out had seemed like the perfect remedy at the time.

Now, a year and a half since she had gone on that mission she knew the truth. The days spent in the Suna interrogation unit, the times she had met him in the glade and especially those nights shared together in the cabin; all of it had been a lie. The hard truth was that he had used her to escape. He had sensed weakness in her and exploited it like the low-life criminal he was. It was the truth but Sakura still found it a bitter draught to swallow because although she'd never admitted it, even to herself, she had loved him. Those few short weeks had cost her a world of pain and even now, she couldn't have said whether it was worth it.

She swallowed the rest of the drink to mask her discomfort. Thinking about _him_ was still painful.

"You've got that look on your face again," Kaito interrupted her thoughts, his deep brown eyes seeing more than she'd care to admit.

"What look?"

"The one I don't like," he answered sadly.

Sakura immediately felt guilty. It wasn't fair of her to bring down other people with her when she was feeling like crap.

"Hey don't be sad," she reached out to grasp his hand firmly. "I'm having a great time with you," she smiled. "If it wasn't for the water everything would be perfect".

"What is it with you and water?" Kaito sighed but returned the smile all the same. Sakura went to withdraw her hand but his grip was rather firm. She desisted. "Do you remember that time in the bookshop?"

"Of course," she replied confidently. "I'd never have pegged you for a reader but back then I only knew you as the strange pervert guy".

"Thanks," Kaito replied sarcastically. "Back then I remembered you as the girl who couldn't handle her drink and had vomit in her hair".

"You know, I don't think I like this conversation," Sakura replied. "I don't know how we became friends after that disastrous first meeting. That day in the bookstore was very embarrassing".

"I know," he grinned. "You tried to hide from me. Unfortunately for you, I'd already spotted you a few minutes before that".

"Why didn't you try to start a conversation with me earlier then?" Sakura's brow knitted in confusion.

"Because in truth, I had no intention of talking to you until you tried to hide," he grinned relaxing back in his chair. "I thought it would be amusing".

"Yes, very amusing," Sakura said through clenched teeth.

"I'm glad you agree," he said annoyingly. He laughed at her expression. "Okay, no more teasing Sakura for today. Would you like another drink? I promise it won't be water".

"Yes please," Sakura replied.

As he strolled off to the bar, it struck her how a year ago she would have thought it very bizarre to end up befriending the man she humiliated herself in front of at this very location and that they could look back on it and laugh.

She sighed, remembering Kaito walking her home on Christmas Eve after a night out with friends, helping her study for a medical exam, going over to his to watch old movies and eat popcorn, her consoling him on the steps of his house after he just received news that his brother had died and him becoming a part of their group to the point where even Naruto had begun to accept him.

_I swear that boy is in love with you._

"Shut up, Ino-pig," Sakura mumbled angrily. It might be selfish of her but she was not willing to give up the only person who made her even remotely happy just because he may or may not have feelings for her. She almost wished that she did love him because it would be a million times better than nursing a broken heart, secretly waiting for a man who would never come back for her. None of her friends had ever been in love. How then, could you comprehend how she was feeling? Because love isn't rational, it isn't planned and it is inexplicable to someone who has not gone through exactly the same thing.

Kaito came back with two steaming mugs of coffee but upon seeing the expression on her face, hastily put them on the table and enveloped her in a long, comforting hug. It conveyed what mere words could not express. Somehow she knew what he was trying to say; that he knew she needed him right now and that she didn't have try to explain anything, he simply accepted that she needed some human contact.

"I'm sorry, Kaito," she murmured into his chest sadly. "I'm not very good company today".

"Don't apologise," he answered. "You have problems at work and you feel your friends are stifling you. You are allowed to show how you are feeling, Sakura. No one can fault you for that".

"I know," she replied hesitantly. "It's just that you don't know the whole story. No one does".

"You mean you are tired of people guessing like Ino and her theory?" He shook his head disgustedly. "I spend a lot of time around you Sakura and I think it's pretty obvious what you are suffering from".

"And what's that?" she asked dubiously.

"Heart-break," he said simply.

Sakura stared speechless. "How- how do you know?"

"You're not the only one ever to have fallen in love," he murmured, stroking her hair softly. "So you see you were wrong. I _do_ understand".

Without making a conscious decision, she leaned forward impulsively and kissed him on the lips. His eyes widened in shock as if he couldn't quite believe what was happening but as she started to pull away, he pulled her closer, melding his lips with hers.

* * *

_Sakura lay on the dewy grass in a sunlit clearing watching the clouds wheel overhead. She felt happy. Happier than she had felt in a long time. The happiness swelled like a giant balloon inside of her until she could stand it no more and leapt to her feet. There was a wooden cabin behind her. She couldn't place her finger on it but she could have sworn that she'd seen it before. As she started towards it, strong, muscled arms wrapped around her body, pinning her in place. She giggled as he planted light butterfly kisses along her neck. "Deidara, that tickles!" she protested, squirming in his grasp. His laugh made her whole body shake. Grinning, she twisted round to face him and wrapped her arms around his neck._

_"I like this," she admitted shyly. "I never want this to change"._

_"Me neither, yeah," he smiled, kissing her lightly upon the lips which she returned eagerly. He held her close as if he were afraid she might slip from his grasp. __"I promise," he murmured, "never to leave you again"._

"Deidara". Sakura woke from her sleep feeling groggy and disorientated. Squinting closely at her alarm clock, she could just about make out that it was 5AM. The birds were making such a din that she was surprised she hadn't woken earlier. It was only a dream, she realised with a sinking feeling. Just a stupid dream. Slowly, she started to get out of bed but found she couldn't move. One large, muscled arm was wrapped around her waist and for the first time, she noticed the sounds of heavy breathing behind her. Carefully, she disentangled herself from the arm and slipped out of bed. Kaito slumbered peacefully on the right side of the bed, blankets bunched messily around his form. The events of the night before hit her like an oncoming train and it was all she could do to get out of the room as quietly as she could before she really lost it.

"You idiot, Sakura," she whispered to herself furiously as she began to brew a very strong cup of coffee. "You fucking idiot! What have you done?"

She sat slumped at her table, attempting to control the tremors that wracked her body. Her hands gripped the mug so tightly it almost shattered while tears trickled down her cheeks. She'd really fucked up. She'd just thrown the relationship with one of her best friends down the toilet. He would never forgive her for this. _Never._

The cup of coffee had long since turned cold by the time she felt calm enough to drink it. With a heavy sigh she poured the contents of her mug down the sink.

Tap, tap.

The mug slipped from Sakura's fingers to the floor. She made a lunge for it and missed, wincing as the porcelain shattered into a thousand pieces. Quickly, she swept the pieces up with her dustpan and brush and deposited them in the bin with a sigh. Kakashi had bought her that mug.

Tap, tap, tap.

It sounded like someone tapping on the kitchen window.

"What the-? Hasn't anyone heard of a front door before?" Sakura growled, stomping over to the window and throwing it open. She poked her head out of the window and looked up and down the landing outside her flat. There was no one there. "Kids," she said in disgust.

As she made to close the window a bird flew into her apartment. Sakura stared at it disbelievingly as it dropped a letter on the table. "Wait a minute!" she called as the strangely familiar bird flew out of the window again.

She picked the letter up and turned it over. It looked pretty unremarkable. Her name was written on the front in spidery letters. A sudden inexplicable urge to tear the letter to shreds came over her. This letter could hold nothing good. It would be better to spare herself more pain and anguish. Ridiculously she found herself opening it instead.

The same spidery handwriting covered the paper inside. It read:

_Sakura,_

_ I had hoped to send you a letter sooner but circumstances prevented me from doing so. I know it's a poor excuse but it's something I can't explain in here in case it gets intercepted. I know you have a lot of questions and I will answer them the best I can if you decide to meet me. I know a long time has passed since we last saw each other and you might not feel the same way anymore but if you want to meet me then go to The Jasmine Teahouse in three days time. Just one more thing. Being with you made me realise what I wanted and to strive to become a better man. I just wanted you to know in case I don't get to tell you in person. See you soon I hope, _

_D._

Sakura stared at the letter as tears trickled down her cheeks and onto the page. Some of the words were already becoming smudged. She couldn't bear to read the words a second time. The pain she had been feeling before was nothing compared to the anguish she felt right now. She scrunched the letter up into a tight ball and slid down the side of the cupboard to the floor, filled with raw pain, grief and self-loathing.

She had been wrong before. She hadn't really fucked up. She was way beyond that now.

* * *

_A/N: So what do you think of this new development?_ _I'd __really like to know what you think. I'm a little nervous that people will hate it._


	17. Spilt Milk

**A/N:** Finally this super long update is finished. We're finally back on track after the year and a half time skip. Some of you may have noticed that I haven't answered a question from way back in chapter one: why Sakura was chosen to heal Deidara in the sand. This will be answered in chapter 18. Yes, I did plan that far ahead. Enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

* * *

**Chapter 17: Spilt Milk**

* * *

The report was quite possibly the most dull and long winded document she had had the pleasure of reading in a long time. Three pages in to the annual crop takings and she was almost ready to call it a day. A frown creased her brow as she flicked the page over. The clock ticking upon the wall seemed to be moving more slowly than usual. Every quiet tick tock was the sound of a sledgehammer pounding against her skull.

"This is ridiculous," she muttered as she skimmed through the rest of the forty page document with a pained expression.

Knock, knock.

Tsunade had barely set down the offending pieces of paper when Sakura burst into her office, red-faced and out of breath. Grateful for the intrusion, the Hokage did not at first notice the way Sakura twisted her hands - in the exact way she always did when suffering from an extreme case of nerves - or the way her green eyes sparkled with sudden life. After them being deadened for so long, Tsunade was immediately taken aback by the abrupt transformation of her student.

A flicker of unease ignited in the pit of her stomach. Sakura had been a great source of worry for months when she did not recover from whatever trauma she had been subjected to. Countless times, the older woman had tried to pry the truth from her student's unwilling mind but all her effort had been for nothing. Sakura had remained as distant and remote as ever. Therefore it was unsurprising that she found her student's sudden change a cause for alarm.

"Shishou". Tsunade almost started at the sound of the younger medic's voice. It sounded hopeful but there was an undercurrent of desperation that she did not like the sound of at all. "You know how you've been saying that I should take a break to get my head straight?" Sakura took a deep breath and continued. "Well I think I'm going to take it".

Ordinarily the Hokage would have been thrilled that Sakura was finally taking her advice but now she only felt a sense of foreboding. She cracked a small smile, reluctant to let Sakura know her true feelings. After all this was the first positive sign she had seen that Sakura might be getting back to her old self again. She was afraid to let that chance slip away again.

"You chose some week to pick this time out, Sakura," Tsunade began reproachfully. "The hospital is completely swamped with patients and with so many staff ill, everyone is working overtime. Don't get me wrong, I think time out is exactly what you need but in the present circumstances I don't see how we can spare you".

"But-," she protested, unconsciously striding closer to the huge mahogany desk. Her eyes were strangely bright and shiny.

"Next week," the blonde promised, already reshuffling the papers on her desk indicating that the conversation was closed. She had barely thumbed her way through the agricultural document to page four when she realised Sakura hadn't moved.

"Next week will be too late," Sakura said in a strangled voice, unable to conceal her small sob of despair. "There won't be any point in going".

Tsunade watched her with a mixture of confusion and concern. "Why does it have to be this week?" she asked, steeping her fingers together as she scrutinised the young medic closely.

"I-," Sakura stalled, searching for the words to say. "I just need to be away from Konoha for a while," she admitted with a sigh. "I can't explain it, I just can't stand being here a moment longer". As she talked, Tsunade noticed that her voice became stronger with each passing word. "I need some time for myself to think and I won't get that here. If I don't take it now, the moment will pass and I won't go at all".

The Hokage leant back in her chair contemplatively. She hadn't been lying when she said the hospital was understaffed and to make matters worse, Shizune had called in sick this morning. The eighth medic to succumb to the particularly virulent illness. However, this was the first time she had seen Sakura this determined or alive in a long time. Dare she risk it?

"Alright, you can go," the blonde woman sighed wearily, passing a tired hand over her eyes. The hospital would just have to manage without her. "How long will you be gone for?"

"A week I should think," the medic replied, still twisting her fingers together. "I can't tell you what this means to me".

"Then I won't ask," Tsunade said with a small smile that did not quite meet her eyes.

"I should go," Sakura said, eyeing the pile of papers on her Shishou's desk. "It looks like you have a lot of work to get through".

Tsunade shrugged, not liking the sudden reminder. The bottle of Sake hidden behind a fat folder containing hundreds of proposals for the village was suddenly more appealing. That was until she remembered Hatake and his stupid bet.

Sakura was almost at the door when she turned back. "Thank you for doing this for me, Shishou," she said gratefully. With a sad smile she shut the door carefully behind her. The moment she was gone Tsunade dropped her neutral facade, an anxious expression slowly spreading across her features. She couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong. She sensed that she should have pushed Sakura harder about what was troubling her.

_No, _she thought, shaking her head distractedly. Sakura was old enough to take care of herself now and the last thing she needed was to be treat like a child. The best thing to do would be to stop worrying like an overprotective mother and let Sakura figure things out for herself. After all, what could she get up to in just a few days?

* * *

Heart thudding madly, Sakura jerked to a halt outside her flat. Propped up against the door frame, shielding his eyes from the bright sunlight with one hand was Kaito. Her stomach plummeted sharply. She should have known this was coming. Fate would not allow her an easy exit it would seem. She ignored the look of accusation in his eyes and tried to slip past him with a small "hi".

Quick as lightning, his hand reached out to block her path. "You left". She felt a twinge of guilt upon hearing the mixture of confusion, hurt and anger in his voice.

"Kaito," she began with a sigh, sidling past him into the untidy living room and moving some laundry from the sofa. She plonked the clothes in the laundry basket then wandered off to the sink and half-heartedly began to wipe the grime off some plates. Every time she opened her mouth the words ran dry. The truth was that there was nothing she could say to make it right. Although she could sense the fury radiating in waves from his body, she continued to scrub the burnt remains off the bottom of a pan knowing that she was only exacerbating the problem by avoiding conversation.

After several minutes spent in heavily loaded silence, Sakura heard the very question she'd been dreading.

"So what exactly happened last night?" he asked hesitantly, struggling to keep his barely controlled emotions in check. He shoved his hands deep into the pockets of his jeans and gazed at the floor, unable to continue looking at the girl with her back turned to him.

After a pregnant pause, she slowly turned to face him, surprised at how close they were. It was a little intimidating to tell the truth. His eyes were fixed rigidly upon a spot of wall behind her and his expression was one of hurt. Internally Sakura flinched. For the past year and a half she had shied away from confrontation. She wished she had the courage to say the words that kept tying her throat in knots but the thought of seeing that look on his face again and worse, being the one to cause it, held her back.

"I don't know," she mumbled, slipping past his motionless figure, unable to bear the claustrophobic tension that suffused the room. She slumped onto the brown, lumpy sofa despondently. A half beat later Kaito joined her, his body angled towards hers.

"What do you mean?" Confusion knit his brow. Sakura exhaled deeply, wishing that she could find a way to do this without hurting him.

"I'm sorry, Kaito," she said sadly, a look of deep regret upon her face. "It was a one-time thing. I'm not looking to start something new right now".

"Okay," he said through gritted teeth, brown eyes awash with pain. "I just don't get how you could do that to me. You must have known how I feel about you".

"Kaito," Sakura pleaded as he slipped her hand from his own and rose from his seat. Instinctively she reached out for him but he angled his body so that it was beyond her reach. Stung, she withdrew her hand. "Please, let me explain".

He nodded briefly, his expression taut.

"Yesterday," she said in a rush, the words tumbling over each other as they fought to escape the confines of her throat. "Everything became too much for me. That's why I wanted to go to a bar, to forget my problems for a while. I couldn't trust myself to be alone. I needed you, more than ever".

Instead of placating him, the words seemed to have the opposite effect.

"You used me," he accused. Sakura made no effort to deny his words, knowing that anything she said would only make the situation worse. She stared unblinkingly at a dark stain on her pale violet carpet, willing herself to remain still. Everything she touched turned to ashes. She could not defend her actions.

"It wasn't supposed to-," she began uncertainly. Kaito put his weight on the edge of the tiny, cheap coffee table and leaned forward, his face inches from hers. She had to look away. That warm, compassionate gaze she loved so much had vanished and was replaced by a cold, angry stare.

"I can't believe this," he laughed softly through his enraged disbelief. "You're still defending yourself. Really, Sakura? Do you have any idea how self-centred and insensitive you are? Did you ever stop to think how much this could hurt me?"

"I never meant it to go so far", she whispered. "I am really, truly sorry for what I did".

He shook his head, "It will take a lot more than a simple apology to make this right".

"Please, let me try," she begged. "You're one of my best friends, Kaito and you've been there for me through thick and thin. I won't give up until you forgive me".

Kaito heaved a huge sigh. "Look this conversation isn't good for either of us. I can barely stand to look at you right now. You never thought about the consequences of last night which just goes to show that you care about yourself more than me".

"No I-".

"Yes, you do. This is hard enough as it is, don't make it any harder".

His parting words were the most wounding.

"Do not try to contact me again, Sakura. I don't want any letters of apology or visits to my house. I want to be left alone. You owe me that much".

The door slammed shut, effectively ending the conversation and their friendship.

* * *

With worn travel gear clinging to her skin, a pack of medical supplies jangling on her shoulder and a heavy heart, Sakura walked through the large gates of Konoha, eyes fixed resolutely ahead. She would not look back, she told herself firmly. What's done is done.

She ignored the mixture of friendly and curious shinobi clustered around the gate, waiting for whom, Sakura did not care. She thanked her lucky stars that no one she knew was on duty today and could skip the long, awkward conversation in which she would feel guilty for not keeping her friends in the loop and the slightly injured look upon their faces when they realised that she was leaving without saying goodbye. She smiled blandly at the faceless ninja on duty, her muscles moving out of habit rather than from any real pleasure.

Part of her wondered why she was undertaking this pointless journey. Perhaps she thought she hadn't been punished enough. After all she was selfish and uncaring. She didn't deserve to be happy. Whatever the reason, Sakura's body had a will of its own because she suddenly found herself halfway to the edge of the village with no recollection of how she'd got there. This was inconsistent with her actions after previous encounters with well-meaning friends, who'd staged various interventions in the hope that the old Sakura would resurface. To tell the truth, she wasn't sure if that person existed anymore. Usually she would have sought the comfort of her apartment, resurfacing days later to anxious expressions and loaded looks from her friends.

That was the worst part.

No one could understand that secretly she cherished those hours alone in her apartment, secluded from the rest of the world. Despite the anguish that tore her mind and heart apart until she thought she might collapse from the pain, she also dreamed. The dreams were different each time but they all had one constant; Deidara. Visions of what could have happened if she'd never left him, if they had met in a different circumstance, of sharing a life together, of simply talking to him tormented her sleep and subsequent waking hours. When she dreamed it was the one time she was truly happy, but all dreams must come to an end and when reality came crashing down, those paper-thin, insubstantial illusions only added to her suffering. Even though it was insane to keep doing so, she refused to surrender those false memories, her last remnant of Deidara. All those dreams gifted her was fresh pain but it was all she had.

It seemed unbelievable after everything she had endured that she was finally going to see him again. The contents of the letter had said things she'd only dreamed of. Could it be that he actually still wanted her? The last year and a half had been immeasurably long. She wondered if he would be how she remembered. She had spent so long fabricating memories of him that she wasn't sure where reality stopped and fantasy began but her feelings for him had never changed.

Perhaps this was what it was all about. To see if he was the man she remembered, to find out why he took so long to contact her, to see if he really did want her after all. And if she met him and they picked up right where they left off, what would that mean for her then? Deidara was a missing-nin so the thorny problem that was Kaito would never be an issue. She felt a pang of discomfort at the thought of leaving everyone she cared about behind for good. She wished she could have left things on a better note and spared everyone all the pain she'd caused. Especially Kaito.

She shook her head. Thinking about leaving Konoha in abstract was one thing, actually doing it was another. She wasn't sure she could give up her home just like that and be hunted by people she'd thought of as comrades, friends and family. The mere thought made her feel ill.

At sundown she reached a small village, no closer to untangling the jumble of thoughts swirling round her head than ever. As she approached a black dog barked from a nearby garden, asserting its territory. The commotion attracted the attention of two young children playing with a wooden hoop in the centre of the road. They scattered as she passed, staring at her with large innocent eyes. She watched as they ran back inside the house and she felt the smile slide off her face like rain water. A quick survey of the village informed her that it was too small to boast an inn and several windows had slammed shut at her approach so she doubted there was anyone willing to lend her a bed for the night.

The wind was picking up and with it came a bitter cold chill so Sakura decided to scout for a sheltered place to sleep. This time at least she had dressed correctly for the weather. She was wearing a thick jacket lined with fur and had the foresight to bring a sleeping bag with sufficient insulation. After several minutes of searching she found a hollow near to the village. It was adequate she supposed.

It was just when she was smoothing out her sleeping bag and preparing to wriggle into it that it happened.

The village flickered to life like an anthill that had just been disturbed. Lanterns illuminated the silhouettes of men and women holding rudimentary weapons; pitchforks, axes, hammers, even frying pans. Stock-still, her nerves jangling, Sakura watched the scene unfold. Her first thought was that someone had identified her as a threat and they were preparing to hunt her down. Upon closer inspection she realised that this was not so. A group of men, run-of-the-mill bandits by the look of them, were fast approaching the village. A wooden cart pulled by a horse rolled after them.

The medic's brain worked furiously as she contemplated what to do. She had heard of similar events occurring in other lands but she had never thought that it would spread to her beloved homeland. Knowing that she only had minutes, Sakura slipped down the west slope towards the village as swift as a shadow. Coming to a halt behind a particularly large house, she surveyed the scene before her. The men were standing protectively in front of their wives. She could see the fear reflected in their eyes but their mouths formed hard, determined lines, suggesting that they would do anything to protect their own. A few children peeped through the open windows of surrounding houses. Everyone's attention was upon the newcomers.

"This is your last chance," a dark, unshaven man called to the wary villagers. Sakura saw one woman slip her hand into her neighbour's reassuringly. The other woman smiled thinly. "You can either give us what we want or we will exact our payment by any means necessary. We will not vouch for the safety of your families," his thin features cracked into an unsavoury smile at these words.

"If you think we are going to back down from the likes of you, you are mistaken," a gruff man with a broad belly and black, coarse hair barked back. "You will never have them. We will fight to the last man".

"As you wish," the leader chuckled darkly. "Other villages said the same but they soon changed their tune when their houses were burnt down and their children slaughtered in front-"

Rough, dirty hands reached instinctively up to his throat where blood gushed freely from an open wound. The light from the lanterns illuminated a single black kunai, deeply embedded in the soft concave of his throat. Choking, the man doubled over, thrashing wildly before falling face down in the dirt. He did not move.

The sudden silence that followed was deafening. Uneasy looks were shared on both sides and a few glanced up towards the ridge where the unknown enemy lay in wait. Then as if by some unspoken signal, both sides erupted into chaos. A few of the bandits leapt towards the panicked villagers, swords outstretched while the rest disbanded taking the horse and cart with them. Half the villagers were still frozen in shock. Two were hacked ruthlessly apart by naked steel as the bandits leapt towards them. As Sakura stepped out from the shadows she heard a couple of doors slam shut, the sound echoing across the chaotic street.

Sharp eyes scanning the area, she watched as a group of men and women converged upon the bandits, screaming and shouting. They looked like they would hold for now. Movement out of the corner of her eye, forced her to pivot sharply before realising that there was no immediate danger. One of the bandits was attempting to break into a house in which several young children were hiding. A clay pot fell from an upper window, smashing at his feet. _This ends now_, she thought grimly.

Sakura walked coolly up to the large, red-faced man whose shirt was drenched in sweat from exertion. She wrinkled her nose in disgust before punching her fist right through his middle. It was easier than cutting butter. Blood dripped from her blood-soaked hand but she barely noticed. A few cheers erupted from the upstairs window but she pretended not to notice.

The second target was even easier than the first. He wasn't even aware of her presence until cold steel bit into the soft flesh of his throat. The third saw her coming and attempted to use a human shield, a middle-aged woman with bird-like features, but that could not save him. Quick as lightning, Sakura appeared behind him and with one sharp movement she jerked his head to the side, feeling the bones snap beneath her grasp.

She turned to face the fourth and the fifth but discovered that the villagers had already taken care of them. One looked as though he had been clubbed to death and the other had been speared with a pitchfork. Uncertain of the villagers reactions, she walked slowly towards the large crowd. People moved aside at her approach. Her presence unnerved them, she could tell.

"Help him!" A woman's scream cut through the night air. "My Haru, he needs help!"

It was the hysteria in her voice that drew the medic, despite the hostility radiating from some of the villagers. She forced her way to the front of the press of bodies that had converged on the wailing woman. A boy of about ten lay on the ground, his chest quivering as his breathing became shallow and rapid. A sword protruded from his side. The naked terror in his eyes as he looked up into his mother's face was more than Sakura could bear. The mother took her hand in his and squeezed gently. Sakura's mind was more concerned with the blood that ran in rivulets from the weeping wound, pooling around the boy's prone figure. He had lost a lot of blood and without the correct medical facilities...

Suddenly, the mother reached out to her son, hands shaking, and tried to pry the sword from her son's side. The motion brought Sakura into immediate action.

"Stop! Don't touch that!" she stepped into the circle and knelt on the dusty floor beside the boy. "I am Haruno Sakura, a medic from Konoha. Let me help him".

The woman's haunted face met hers and after what felt like an age, she slowly stepped aside.

* * *

"How is he doing?" Okichi leant against the wooden frame, surveying the darkened room before her. Her face was haggard and lined with deep circles under her eyes. Sakura glanced up from the stool she was perched precariously upon, setting down the bandages with a sigh.

"Better," she replied. "The sword didn't hit any vital organs so he should recover with nothing more than a scar. It was lucky that I was passing through".

"I don't know how we can thank you enough," Okichi answered, gratitude seeping into her every word. "I know it's not much but I've made you some soup and you are more than welcome to sleep here for the night".

"That's thanks enough," she smiled. "And besides if it wasn't for you, he wouldn't have stood a chance".

"A mother will always protect her child," the older woman said fiercely. "No matter the cost".

Sakura smiled thinly, uncertain of how to respond to that statement. Her relationship with her own mother was tenuous at best and she had never shown any signs of wanting to protect her daughter from anything. In fact if it wasn't for Sakura's staunch belief that family should stick together, their relationship would have withered and died a long time ago.

"Those men," Okichi continued in a low voice, full of bitterness and hatred, "they don't even deserve to be called human. I have heard tales from other villages of the atrocities they have committed there. You are a kunoichi so I won't spare you the grisly details. They travel across the different nations, sowing violence and discord as they go. No one knows who they are or where they come from".

"I could have left one alive, interrogated them," Sakura said slowly. "Back in Konoha, we've heard some of the rumours. We could have located their base and discovered who is behind all of this".

"Will you stay and help us defeat them?" The older woman put Sakura's hand in hers. "You could stop the casualties and save other villages that need your help just as much as we do".

"I'm sorry," Sakura shrank away from Okichi's touch, "but I can't. I'm not equipped to tackle something this huge on my own. But you have not been abandoned. I heard from a very reliable source that the Hokage is drawing up a task force to combat these issues".

"Very well," the woman said, slightly disappointed. "You've already done us a great service. We can't ask for much more than that". She suddenly smiled. "You look dead on your feet. I think you look ready to taste some of my delicious soup".

Sakura smiled wearily back. "That would be lovely thank you".

* * *

The inky black sky dotted with tiny pin-pricks of light did little to illuminate the two cloaked figures that surveyed the small sturdy fences, wide open spaces and twisted copses that dotted the landscape. The wind whistled softly through the tangled grasses, ruffling their cloaks and grasping at the last few leaves that clung stubbornly to the trees. The silence between the two men was not uncomfortable. This was a ritual they had had both partaken in many times. The younger of the two flexed his hands reflexively, missing the feel of something to roll, shape or squish between his fingers. The dark-haired man next to him paid him no mind. The blonde knew better than to expect anything different.

But tonight every minute counted. He could not justify standing here "enjoying the view" as the other shinobi put it any longer than necessary. He did not have the luxury of time. A quick glance at his companion told him all he needed to know. The thrice-blasted man showed no inclination to initiate conversation this century let alone tonight.

A scowl threatening to grace his features, the younger man turned to face the other. "I know you're a man of few words, but this is getting ridiculous, yeah," he growled impatiently. "You tell me what you know, I return the favour, job done".

The dark-haired stranger closed his eyes, making his pale face more drawn than usual. "Well that's the point, isn't it Deidara? You haven't told me everything".

"I've told you what you need to know, yeah," he countered roughly. "Don't make the mistake of confusing allies with friends. We have this mutual agreement because we share common goals. Once that ceases to exist, you had best stay out of my way, yeah".

The other man's lip quirked up in amusement. "You can try. But you are wrong. What you do in your spare time does concern me if it threatens to jeopardise the entire mission". He flashed Deidara a cold, hard look. "Do not expect assistance from me if your little holiday romance turns south. Your little friend cannot be trusted".

"This is none of your business, yeah," the blonde spat, fists furled and eyes flashing dangerously. He seized the lapels of the man's cloak, not even so much as flinching when his eyes turned a deep crimson.

"Don't be a fool," Itachi shrugged him aside coldly. "I could have killed her months ago if I had wished to but as long as she was safe in the village, away from you she was not a liability".

"If you so much as touch her," Deidara snarled, blood running in scarlet trails from his tightly clenched fists.

"I won't need to," Itachi countered icily. "If you expose her to the truth and drag her into this life, then you will have killed her".

Deidara said nothing.

"If you want my advice, purge yourself of this weakness". His cloak billowed in the wind as he began to walk away. "For all our sakes".

* * *

The square, wooden building had a certain charm to it, Sakura had to admit. The roof was painted a calming turquoise colour with carved dragons wrapped around the wooden supports, snapping playfully at each other. The door was solid oak with a cute rounded window in the top and two bushes standing like sentinels on either side of the door. She raised one eyebrow quizzically. From what she knew of the man, the place was not to Deidara's taste at all. Perhaps she'd misread the letter she thought gloomily. Despite the welcoming atmosphere, Sakura's feet felt like lead. Slowly, she dragged them across the rough beaten track and towards the doormat, sending up little plumes of dust that settled over her worn boots.

Upon entering, the merry tinkling that announced her presence sounded abnormally loud to her ears but no one gave her undue attention. Her shoulders sagged in relief. As she scanned the room, she half hoped, half dreaded to spot a cloaked figure, hunched over his drink in some dark corner of the room. Her trepidation was for nothing. He wasn't there. Crippling disappointment twisted in her gut as she walked past the oblivious chattering civilians, confiding in their close friends or relations about their mundane lives. The few couples in the room were given a very wide berth as Sakura walked over to the most isolated section of the room away from the general hubbub. Unable to help herself she glanced around the room several times, hoping she'd missed him amongst the crush of bodies occupying the bar. Each search added to her growing distress.

Perhaps he was late she reassured herself as she toyed with a small packet of sugar between her fingers. The bell jangled and she glanced up eagerly at the two young women who'd just entered the establishment, comparing lipsticks by the look of it. Her face fell, noticing the ripped packet and scattered sugar grains littering the sturdy oak table. She swept them aside impatiently, sinking back into her brooding state.

Maybe he'd got the day wrong, she mused. Perhaps he hadn't taken into account the length of time it would take for the bird to travel to Konoha. That would be so typical for a man. She pushed the sugar into little mounds with her index finger and created meaningless, swirling sugar trails to soothe her anxious thoughts. Had there been a time on the letter? Sakura couldn't recall but if there had been one, surely she would have had a vague inkling of the time?

The bell jangled a second time and her head jerked upwards again in anticipation. Moments later, she resumed her task, silently hating herself.

What if _he'd _changed _his_ mind? What if he sent the letter on a whim and immediately regretted it? Surely he'd have let her know if there had been a change of plans? Her stomach clenched uncomfortably. She wished she'd obeyed her first instinct and not opened the letter. It had opened a can of worms that should have invariably remained closed. She sighed, kneading her fists into her forehead. The emotions she had tried and failed - miserably, might she add - to extinguish the past year and a half came bubbling to the surface. She felt broken, her heart barely more than a husk of what it was.

How much more of this could she endure? She felt suffocated by her emotions, overburdened by their immeasurable weight. She had thought that the pain would dim and fade with time but if anything in the rare moments that it took over, it had intensified. A few angry tears trickled down her cheeks. She couldn't believe that she deserved this. Angrily, she wiped the traitorous tears away. She spent several minutes inhaling deeply, counting to five and exhaling again. She was in a public place. She needed to compose herself.

"Excuse me". The soft voice startled her so badly that the remaining sugar grains scattered violently across the table. Her face was upturned towards his, her expression hopeful. Neat black hair and green eyes met hers. Not _him_ then. She realised that he was wearing a uniform and held out a piece of paper, a knowing smile upon his lips. When she looked up, he was gone.

Tentatively she unfolded the paper. A second later, she crumpled it in one hand and stood up, eyes shimmering brightly and heart thudding erratically. She let it fall to the floor as she half-walked, half-ran across the bar. The paper unfurled slightly, revealing its message: _In the parlour, D._

The oak door swung back and forth as the medic tramped through following the winding sixteenth century passage, footsteps echoing on the uneven wooden floor. She stopped outside a door with a tiny plaque on it proclaiming its name. Without a moment's hesitation she pushed her way inside. A merry fire was crackling in the grate and several red faded squashy chairs dotted the room. Deidara sat at a table in the corner, scratching out a bird in flight into the woodwork. At her approach he rose from his seat a strange play of emotions crossing his features. "You came, yeah," he said softly.

"You never wrote, Deidara," Sakura began in a voice thick with emotion, her chest heaving. "For eighteen long months... nothing".

He took a few steps towards her warily, unsure of her reaction. Her furious expression melted at his approach and her resolve crumbled. The distance between them dissolved to nothing as she recklessly closed the last few steps and sank into his arms. His scent enveloped her; a combination of wood smoke and musk. She inhaled deeply, pulling him closer. Regretfully she pulled away, full of conflicting emotions.

"You have a lot of explaining to do, you know," she sighed, dropping her pack heavily on the floor and shrugging out of her coat. Deidara watched her, eyes tense and slightly riled. He took deep steadying breaths, reminding himself that from her point of view she had every right to be angry with him. She did not know the truth.

"Later, yeah," he answered unwillingly, averting his gaze.

"I _need_ to know," she said through gritted teeth. "Please, Deidara".

"Later," he repeated, motioning for her to join him on the couch. She sat down reluctantly, staring unseeing at the crackling flames. After a moment she turned to face him.

"Please, just set my mind at ease," she said tiredly. "I don't know what to think about all this, about you. It's a lot to take in. You show up out of the blue after over a year. I thought you'd forgotten all about me". _Or at least didn't care_, she added silently.

"I hadn't forgotten, yeah," he sighed, slipping an arm around her thin, pale shoulders. He could feel the hard bones jutting out underneath her skin and her clothes hung more loosely than he remembered. "Perhaps we should order something first, yeah".

"Don't change the subject," she warned him, instinctively nestling against his body for warmth. She could feel the hard toned muscles underneath his top and bit down the sudden impulse to explore them more thoroughly. She was supposed to be angry, she reminded herself. However she was finding it difficult to concentrate. The sensation of his thumb gently stroking her forearm was very distracting. This was real, tangible. A whole world away from the nights spent alone in bed, pretending that the duvet wrapped around her small form were the arms that she longed to hold her close. She had spent so long pretending that she was surprised to find that the real thing was much more solid and unyielding.

"A compromise then," his crystalline blue eyes captured hers, freezing her in place. "You order something to eat and I will attempt to answer some of your questions, yeah".

"Some?" She asked, her tone slightly accusatory. "Why not all?" She shifted uncomfortably in his grasp, aware that he did not deserve her forgiveness. Why then, were his arms still around her?

"There are some I'm not ready to answer yet, yeah," he replied softly. When she tried to interrupt, he cut her off. "This is a _compromise_, Sakura".

She shrugged off the patronising tone and reached for a menu, perusing it with extraordinary enthusiasm. Though her eyes were fixed determinedly upon the menu they were rigid, unmoving. Deidara sighed resignedly and then hugged her more tightly.

"I forgot how sensitive you can be, yeah".

Tears pricked in the corners of her eyes. Despite her calm outward veneer, a tumult of emotions were playing havoc with her heart. It was hard to keep her head straight. To assure herself that this was real, she kept pinching herself when he wasn't looking.

"I'll have the smoked salmon," she said decisively, keeping the quaver out of her tone. She passed the menu over, allowing a brief respite from his attention as he inspected the menu. Most inconveniently, he had a knack for guessing what was on her mind and she was not sure she wanted it read right now. She had an awful suspicion that she would burst into tears if she had to explain the last eighteen months of her life.

"And I'll have some udon, yeah," he smiled. "Be right back". She tentatively smiled in return.

Luckily, she only had to endure three minutes of her poisonous thoughts before Deidara returned, bringing the warmth and sunlight into the room with him. This time her smile was genuine.

"So where were we?" she asked as the couch drooped and sagged from the extra weight as Deidara sat down.

"That is up to you, yeah," he replied. "I reserve all my questions for tomorrow".

"Tomorrow?" She repeated, already anticipating the frightening new possibilities. Deidara did not mean to leave her tonight then.

"Tomorrow," he confirmed, kissing her gently on the lips. Her body remained locked in place as she grappled with the desire to surrender herself to that kiss and the fear of being hurt again, of being drawn into a well of despair so deep that there was no hope of salvation. Before her confused disjointed mind could come to a decision, it was over. The whole thing had lasted no more than a second.

Pushing aside her mixed feelings for a moment, she thought of all the questions that had nearly drove her mad with asking. It was a long list.

"Okay," she leant back into the sofa, in danger of disappearing into its faded, red folds. "Where have you been all this time?"

"All over the place," he answered, staring off into the distance. "Kumogakure, the land of Iron, the land of Waves-"

"The land of Fire?" Sakura interrupted.

"Briefly," he confirmed with a sigh, waiting for the inevitable explosion that would follow.

"And yet you couldn't send a message?" Sakura was on her feet, breathing heavily, fists clenched.

"Do you want me to answer your questions or not, yeah?" Deidara growled. "I wanted to, believe me I did, but it just wasn't possible. Ask me something else for now, yeah".

Exceedingly put out, Sakura sat down again and slowly exhaled. "I'm trying to understand Deidara, I'm really trying but you're making this so hard".

"I know," he replied. "You will hear the answers later I promise you, if you still want to that is".

"You're unbelievable," she sighed. "My next question is what have you been doing since I left you that day?"

"You never really left me," he disagreed. "Something about you, it changed me. I'm not the same as I was before," he cleared his throat. "I'm not good with all the touchy-feely stuff, so let's leave it at that, yeah. I realised that as the Akatsuki were no longer aware of my existence, I had a chance at a new life. I could start a life somewhere new, far away from all of this, yeah. But I also realised none of it meant anything without you".

She watched him silently as she held his calloused hand, gently stroking the hardened, tanned skin.

"But I could never ask you to leave Konoha the way I left Iwa. I knew enough about the Akatsuki to know that they were never going to let your village exist peacefully, yeah. Eventually there would be a conflict and many would die. One of them could be you. I could not let that happen".

"So you've been working against the Akatsuki all this time?" Sakura stared at him with eyes full of fresh worry. She felt a twinge of guilt as she considered all that he'd done just to keep her safe. "Deidara, why didn't you tell me before? I'd have wanted to help. I'd have... Wait a minute," she said slowly as something dawned on her. "That's why you didn't contact me before isn't it? You were spying on the Akatsuki and it was too risky to send a message".

"Yeah," he said heavily, glad that she had come to the assumption on her own and hadn't pushed her into it. After all, he didn't want to be called a complete liar when she found out that was only half the truth. _If she found out_, he corrected himself.

"I can't let you continue this alone," she whispered in his ear, tears clinging to her eyelashes. She pulled his head so close to hers that they were touching. "I won't let you".

All her inhibitions had vanished. It did not matter that she'd spent a year and a half in agony. She'd risked her sanity but he'd risked his life, every day, just for her. How could she ever repay such a debt?

She kissed him gently, then more fiercely, drawing blood in her eagerness. Her hands twisted through his long blonde hair as she drew him closer. He responded automatically, the metallic taste of blood upon both their tongues. He growled softly as his hands went to her waist and pulled her onto his lap. She could feel his growing erection through his trousers and moulded her hand against it through the fabric. Her breathing hitched as a hand brushed the naked skin of her belly, travelling slowly upwards to cup her hardening breasts. Intense tendrils of fire snaked down past her abdomen and she pressed herself closer to his groin, reflecting on the inconvenience of clothes at times such as these.

The door opened suddenly and they both sprang apart, flushed and dishevelled. Two steaming plates of food were placed on the table before them as the waiter bowed and exited. Sakura caught Deidara's eye and stifled a laugh. The waiter's face had been beetroot red. She did not notice his brooding expression as she tucked into the deliciously mouth-watering meal. His eyes roved over her bird-like figure and a frown crossed his features upon watching her devour the meal like a person half-starved. It was clear that she had lost a lot of weight.

"Wrong order?"

"Hm, what?" The question caught him off guard. "No, it's fine, yeah".

"Well eat up, it will get cold," she grinned. Deidara complied, his appetite already gone.

_If you expose her to the truth and drag her into this life, then you will have killed her._

Haunted by Itachi's last words, he gazed anxiously at the medic suddenly aware of how fragile she had become. He clenched his fork so tightly it might break. She could never know the truth, he decided. He would _not_ let Itachi's words become a reality.

_A/N: Did the scene between Deidara and Sakura do the story justice? I didn't want to rush it too much as Sakura would be feeling very emotional, understandably. I did draw on my own experiences a bit and adapt and change them to suit Sakura, taking into account how hard it must be not to be able to confide in anyone at all about how she was feeling. Please drop a quick review and give me some feedback.  
_


	18. Renewal

_A/N: Wow, the last few months have been crazy. Thought I'd reward your patience with a quick update. Pure DeiSakuness. Hope it's up to the usual standard. I wrote it rather quickly. Almost forgot to put in the answer to why Sakura went to the Sand in the first place so had to go back and add it in. The conversation might amuse you. Thank you to those who reviewed. It's your reviews that spur me on to finish this. About five chapters left until the end. I can't believe it!_

_Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.  
_

* * *

**Chapter 18: Renewal**

* * *

Sakura dropped sharply to the ground as a leg swung towards her midriff. She felt a slight breeze as it passed over her head. Still crouched low, she caught the leg mid-swing with both hands and twisted in an attempt to unbalance her assailant. He toppled to the ground with a dull thud and exploded in a cloud of smoke at the exact moment a well aimed fist pummelled his stomach. The medic allowed herself a brief grin.

Almost immediately three kunai whistled through the air towards her. She parried automatically and as he'd hoped, took a step back to deflect them with ease. The ground beneath her gave way and immediately she knew she'd made a mistake. A deafening bang echoed around the secluded clearing as chunks of earth were expelled skyward. Sakura was caught by the blast and hurled backwards. Ignoring the bruises she would undoubtedly feel tomorrow she regained her footing, searching the field for her opponent.

The sun was blindingly white, obscuring her vision. Instinctively she turned away from the glare. Sensing that his would use the sun to his advantage she stood stock still, listening intently. She sensed it rather than heard it. Pivoting sharply, she blocked his oncoming attack and forced him to shift to the left, out of the sun. She kept up a relentless stream of attacks, intending to disable or force him backwards. If only she could find a way inside his defence.

It struck her after a couple of minutes that his moves were purely defensive. He hadn't once attacked her since his opening attack after the explosion. The thought niggled at her brain. It felt like he was toying with her and Sakura hated not being taken seriously. The medic lunged sharply and he sidestepped it smoothly. Fully exposed, Sakura jerked away but not soon enough. A cloud of dirt flew towards her face, blocking her vision and sticking to the insides of her windpipe. Spluttering uncontrollably, she felt pain explode in her side before suddenly hitting the ground.

Firm fingers wove through her own, pressing her hands into the dirt. Deidara's body hovered a fraction of an inch above her own, lips tantalisingly close.

"I win," he whispered and bent down to plant a kiss upon her lips. She responded, moulding her mouth around his, savouring his taste upon her tongue. Deidara wrapped his arms possessively around her. With a sense of urgency, he deepened the kiss further and unhooked the clasp of her bra feverishly. Sakura smiled through the kiss as her hands found their way to his belt.

Ah, the perks of having _him _as a sparring partner.

After, they lay breathlessly on the patch of dirt interspaced with clumps of grass. Sakura's head lay across Deidara's smooth chest, listening to the sound of his lungs inhale and exhale rhythmically. His large tanned hands strayed to her pink hair and proceeded to stroke it gently. The field and its surrounding woods appeared oddly at peace after the furious fighting - in both senses of the word - that had taken place not long before. Neither of them wanted to break the tranquil silence that enclosed the clearing. Bathing in the afterglow of what had just transpired, neither wanted to come back to reality.

A bee passed over their heads and Sakura stirred slightly, causing Deidara to move too. He encased her in his toned arms, allowing her head to nestle comfortably just below his.

"Maybe we should do this again in the bedroom later, yeah," Deidara said, smirking. Sakura could feel his chest vibrate as he spoke.

She propped up on her elbow and surveyed him with a smile. "Don't be greedy," she warned half-heartedly, resettling her head comfortably on her new pillow.

"You won't have a choice," he smirked broadly, tracing the pattern of her veins on the inside of her arm. She snatched it away instantly. That tickled.

"You know your strength doesn't rival mine but sure, I'll play along," she mumbled sleepily, closing her eyes. The bright sunlight beating down on her eyelids was warm, pleasant and making her rather drowsy. She barely even noticed a spider scuttle across her ankle and into the grassy wilderness.

"I was just going easy on you, yeah," he replied contentedly. Sakura could well imagine the smirk on his face. "You do need to work on your long range skills though. If I'd been fighting in the air you wouldn't have got anywhere near me".

"Be careful not to underestimate me," Sakura smirked, moving in for another kiss which he returned willingly. "We should get back to the inn. It will be dinner time soon".

"I guess you're right, yeah," he sighed, pulling on his pants and reaching for his t-shirt. His head was just poking through the hole in the top of his t-shirt when he stopped abruptly. "Sakura..." His voice was full of concern.

"What?" She looked at him nonplussed.

Slowly, she followed the invisible line from his outstretched finger to her smooth exposed skin where large bruises were beginning to form.

* * *

Deidara stormed back to his room, not trusting himself to speak for fear of saying something he regretted. Sakura walked a little distance from him, feeling hurt or confused, he couldn't say. He was glad she wasn't beside him. He didn't think he could bear it if he saw the product of his own making before his very eyes again. The bar area was deserted for which he was grateful. They made their way up the narrow, rickety stairs and parted at the top. Neither of them said a word.

Deidara sank slowly onto his double bed and passed a hand over his face. He knew that she'd lost weight but that had barely impeded her in the sparring match they'd had earlier. She had been strong, accurate and was innovative on the battlefield. Her medical skills were of course practically legendary and she was more of a close range fighter than a long one, so he had opted out using most of his long range attacks to test her true ability. However her stamina and speed were definitely lower than he remembered. He suspected that she hadn't gone on very many missions since they last parted. He wondered what else had happened since then that she wasn't telling him.

Seeing her naked had been another shock. Her ribcage was easily noticeable - he could have counted the most of the bones if he'd wished - and her hips jutted out a little more than usual. Her condition wasn't critical but it could be when on the battlefield. He had said nothing because it was the first time they'd been together in a long time and honestly, he had no idea how to deal with something like this.

The shower started next door and he imagined her scraping the dirt off her mottled skin. Earlier, he had envisaged them sharing a shower together but hopes of that had long vanished. With a deep sigh, he retrieved a towel from the radiator and entered his own bathroom, trying very hard not to think about the choice he knew he had to make.

Twenty hot, steamy minutes later Deidara ejected himself from the bathroom and began to rummage through his bag for another set of clothes. His hand briefly brushed against a black cloak with red clouds on it and his stomach clenched uncomfortably, forcing it further into the bag. Sakura didn't need to know he still had that.

He sat in the parlour for ten minutes before Sakura showed up looking considerably cleaner and bruise free. Secretly he was glad that the physical reminder from this morning had gone. She lowered herself onto the sofa nervously, watching him toy with his half empty glass of Sake.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, staring straight ahead. Deidara said nothing. How could he tell her it was okay when he didn't believe that himself?

Dinner was a silent affair. Sakura kept shooting glances at him as if hoping that she could read what was on his mind. He remained resolutely fixed on the meal in front of him, having no idea what he was eating. Eventually, hoping to alleviate some of the guilt and because he was genuinely curious, Deidara turned to Sakura. "I hurt you today. The one thing I thought I wouldn't do".

"Don't worry about it," she said, knowing how hard it was for him to say the words "I'm sorry". She reached out to him and took his hand softly. He looked away.

"What's wrong?" She looked at him worriedly as though she was afraid that he was going to leave her again. That only made it worse. Especially as she had good reason to.

"It's my turn to ask you some questions today, yeah," he said, attempting to shift the topic onto safer ground. To his relief she followed suit.

"Okay".

"Tell me about Konoha," he said. "What have you been doing over the last year and a half?"

"Nothing as exciting as what you've been doing I'm sure," she shot him a small smile. Deidara noticed her attempt to downplay her life and frowned. "Well," she said, noticing the frown, "I've been working at the hospital a lot, doing shift work. My medical skills have really improved".

"I'd noticed," he agreed. "How often did you use the training fields?"

He sighed, noticing her hesitation. "Er, once every two months?" He gave her a look. "I was busy!" she said defensively.

"Okay, anything else?" He was not letting her off the hook that easy.

"Just seeing friends," she said vaguely. "We go out drinking occasionally. My best friend Ino usually goes clothes shopping with me. Naruto and I usually meet at Ichiraku's for ramen. You wouldn't believe how much he eats! Honestly, never offer to pay the bill as it can be a foot long and that's on a good day".

"Okay". He decided not to push her. He watched her finish her meal, certain that she was hiding something. Ridiculous half-formed ideas flitted around his head and he clenched his fist under the table. He couldn't afford to lose his temper with her. Not when they had so little time left.

After she'd wolfed down her first meal, Deidara ordered her another one.

"What was that for? I'm not hungry," she protested.

"My mistake," he pretended. "You can eat it later in your room if you want, yeah".

"I have something that will interest you, yeah," Deidara said as they waited for her second meal to arrive, knowing it would spark her interest and consequently distract her from him ordering said meal.

"What?" she answered, intrigued.

"I know who requested for you to be my personal healer in the Sand". He enjoyed her look of incredulity. "It wasn't who you'd expect. You see, _both_ Konoha and Sunagakure were tricked that day. I found out the moment I er, started observing the Akatsuki's movements. Someone from _inside _the Akatsuki orchestrated that little scenario".

"So, basically the Akatsuki inadvertently played matchmaker that day?" Sakura looked like she didn't know whether to laugh or not. "I could live without knowing that thanks. It sounds a bit perverted".

"Yep," Deidara agreed, grinning.

"What I don't get is why the Akatsuki would care whether I healed you or not," she mused. "I don't understand why they'd take an interest in me, much less care about who was going to keep you alive during questioning".

"Ah," he replied, "well you're right, yeah. They didn't care about any of those things except that you were best friends with Naruto. They figured that if you came, he'd have to come to Sunagakure. Two birds with one stone they figured, yeah".

"Well things didn't turn out exactly the way they planned at least," she tried to make light of the situation, still looking a little bemused. "Me and you for one".

"Yeah," he answered. "They also only got one bijuu. We can't let them possess all nine".

"Yeah," she said quietly. His last comment appeared to have sobered her slightly.

When the meal came Sakura ended up wiping the second plate clean, as he knew she would. She licked the last remnant off her spoon, affixing him with a calculating look.

"Why'd you really invite me here?" She leant away from him slightly to get a better view of his face. "If it has been so dangerous for you to contact me, why do so now?"

A series of emotions crossed his face. His gut instinct was to lie after the events of today. Itachi had been right about many things; they needed a medic for this job but Sakura was no longer suitable. She would serve their purposes in a high-stakes battle but at what cost? The last thing Deidara wanted was to see the only person he cared about dead. On the other hand, saying goodbye to her a second time would be immeasurably hard. It was her company that he desired above all else. It was a battle between what was best for both of them and his own selfish desires.

"I had a window of opportunity to see you before things get too intense," he shrugged, passing off their meeting as though it hadn't been the product of many months worth of planning. "I thought you'd be glad".

"You plan on fighting the Akatsuki," she said flatly, disapproval evident in her tones.

"Not alone," he argued.

"That's not good enough, Deidara," she said stubbornly, already distancing herself from him. Why did it feel like he was going to lose her again? "Have you ever stopped to consider how selfish you are being?"

Anger ignited in the pit of his stomach. If she knew, if she knew what he'd _endured_ for her! He was on his feet without remembering how he'd got there. His fists were hardened rocks. "You know nothing Sakura," he snarled. A deadly sound, darkening the merry little parlour with his rage. "Everything I have done, I've-," he paused, too angry to speak. "You know what," he growled, subconsciously registering the shocked, injured look in her eyes, "just forget it".

The room was suffocating, the walls closing in on him as he hurried out the door. It slammed satisfactorily behind him and in that moment he allowed himself the slightest twinge of regret.

* * *

"Deidara". The door creaked open slowly revealing the moonlit bedspread, Deidara spread-eagled across it. He didn't move from his position, staring resolutely at the ceiling. "Can we talk?"

He grunted which she supposed meant yes. Perched self-consciously upon the blue striped duvet she paused, unsure how to proceed. Deidara was a man of extremes and tonight had reminded her of that. She longed to reassure him but daren't touch him when in such a foul temper especially when she'd helped instigate the disagreement. Sometimes it seemed like all they ever did was fight. They both had volatile tempers, easy to ignite and - she hoped - quick to forgive. She shot a glance his way. Simmering, stony silence. The conversation rested solely on her shoulders then, she surmised.

"From the moment I arrived in Konoha over a year ago, it felt strangely alien. I kept scrutinising completely ordinary things like the grocers or the people walking down the street. I think my friends must have thought I was crazy," she smiled affectionately. "Imagine my discomfort when I realised that it was not Konoha that had changed. It was me".

His sky-blue eyes watched her silently.

"As time passed I became dissatisfied in a way I'd never experienced before. Suddenly the budding relationship between Neji and Tenten began to grate on me. I couldn't stand to be around them and Ino's continued night time escapades irritated me more than ever," she rolled her eyes. "I had no intention of being a bitter harpy just because something they did reminded me of you. The one thing I couldn't have," she gave his hand a gentle squeeze.

"Meeting up with them for lunch or a drink became a rare occurrence and slowly, the hospital started taking over more of my life. I didn't sign up for missions anymore and I agreed to do extra hours because it wasn't like I had anything to do outside of them anyway".

"Why, Sakura?" His hand intertwined with hers, reassuring and firm.

"There was no one I could talk to," she whispered, settling in her usual position against his body. He pulled her legs closer so that she was curled against him, never letting go of her hand. "At least, no one I could talk to about the things that really mattered".

"I missed you," she left a lingering kiss on his soft lips.

"I did too," he said a little uncomfortably.

"Good," she replied, knowing how difficult he found expressing his feelings. His expression shone through in his actions and his art, not words. It was a little difficult at times but she accepted it as best she could.

She hesitated, her muscles involuntarily tensing as she anticipated what came next in the story. She mulled it over for a few seconds before deciding that some things were better left unsaid. This was without of course, taking the fact that he was a shinobi into consideration.

"What is it, yeah?"

She winced, horribly. "Nothing".

"Tell me". It wasn't a request.

She sighed, pushing her fringe out of her eyes as a distraction. "I will tell you if you agree to tell me everything that has happened since we parted. Deal?"

He shook his head. "No deal," he said grimly. She sighed, in a way a little relieved as she lay down on the bed, resting her head on his stomach so that they were at right angles. Her feet hung awkwardly off the bed, suspended over empty space. She traced the vertical lines of the duvet absentmindedly.

"Seems a shame to go back to my bed when there is one conveniently placed right beneath me," she said with a sideways glance at Deidara. He caught on immediately. She lifted one leg over his body and hovered over his lower torso. "You don't need to worry about me," she reassured him, her lips inches from his. His hand reached under her thin nightdress to grasp her thigh and gave it a squeeze.

"That's impossible, yeah," he murmured, breaching the tiny space to kiss her gently. She teased his lower lip gently, a wicked glint in her eye.

"Deidara," she whispered seductively. "Don't worry about taking care of me and focus on me taking care of you". She slipped his already hard length inside her with a soft sigh, knowing that for tonight at least, he couldn't argue.

_So what do you think will happen next? What will Deidara decide? What is he hiding from Sakura? Will their relationship be discovered? They can't hide out in that inn for the rest of the story. I'm so excited to finish this fanfic. You'll see more action and drama. Battles will be fought, loyalties will be questioned and certain events will change everything. **Even the best laid plans may go astray.** Until next time folks! :)_


	19. Reality Strikes

**A/N:** Surprise! Another chapter filled to the brim with action, lies and of course romance. Well folks, we are getting close to the end of Sakura's and Deidara's story. I estimate another five chapters max and then we are done. I also promise to finish this before January when I will once again not have time to update. So pester me to update once a month at least. I'm sure a lot of you will want a quick update after the end of this chapter so please, pester away. Anyway enjoy the latest installment of Consequences and please drop in a quick review.

* * *

**Chapter 19: Reality Strikes**

* * *

"You're leaving already?"

Deidara paused at her disappointed tone, a set of folded black trousers in hand as a mixture of surprise and guilt flashed across his features before he quickly brought them under control. Sakura was leaning against his door frame, her arms folded tightly across her chest. Though he'd never admit it, the look of resignation in her eyes wounded him deeply. The months spent apart had sowed seeds of mistrust between them: she was afraid that he'd leave her again and even with the best intention in the world, Deidara could not refute that accusation because to do so would be a lie.

"We've been here a week, Sakura," he countered, flinging the trousers into his half-packed rucksack. _I've already stayed too long._

"I know," she relented, abandoning her station at the door to perch awkwardly on the bed. "It's just gone so fast. I thought we'd have more time," she said plaintively.

"It will just be for a little while, yeah," he took his hand in hers and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "I promise".

She laughed hollowly. "Your definition of a little while is a little different from others, Deidara," she smiled weakly. Deidara said nothing. He could feel her eyes on him as he collected various personal items from around the room. Her presence was only making this harder.

"I don't like leaving you to embark on this dangerous mission alone," he heard her sigh from the bed. Two loud thumps from the floor indicated that she'd abandoned her shoes. "It's hard enough saying goodbye without worrying about your safety". He nodded, back still turned as he felt around in the corners of the draws for some potentially elusive socks. "Unless," she mused, feigning sudden insight, "I went with you".

"What-?" Deidara's skull collided with the open draw above him and winced as it began to throb. "Are you fucking insane, yeah?" He massaged his scalp angrily, blinking the pain away.

"I'm a medic, Deidara," she argued, tucking her feet under her body as she faced him directly, unleashing the full devastating effect of her gaze. "If it wasn't for me, you'd have died. Have you forgotten that already?"

"No," he growled, rankled. "But you've clearly forgotten that Sasori was aiming for you, not me. I nearly died saving you, yeah". He passed a hand over his eyes, remembering the thrill of horror he'd felt at seeing that dart hone in on Sakura. He never wanted to experience that again. "I can't constantly protect you on the battlefield, Sakura. Just your very presence there is enough to distract me. You are a weakness that could be exploited. I don't want to lose you, yeah".

"But how do I know that I won't lose you?" She said in a very small voice, knees up to her chin as she hugged her calves. He sank on the bed next to her and put his arm around her fragile shoulders. She had put on a little weight since seeing him and he was confident that the earth moves he'd taught her were enough to protect her from all but the exceptional long-range fighters. Unfortunately, exceptional shinobi were the only kind that concerned him. The Akatsuki most of all.

"I will see you again, yeah," he kissed her gently on the side of her forehead. She smiled. "Just promise me that you'll eat proper meals from now on and train every day. Don't shut out those friends of yours either". She stared. "You need to start to trust them again."

"How can I trust them to keep my secrets," she sighed, nestling closer to him, "when I can't tell them about you?"

"I hope that you can one day, yeah," he replied.

"Me too," she whispered.

"Speaking of secrets," he said slowly, thumb massaging her hand in unhurried circles, "there's something I haven't been completely honest about with you." He felt her questioning gaze. "I think you deserve to know the truth, yeah".

To his surprise, her shoulders slumped. "You're forgiven," was her dejected reply. "I've been hiding something from you too."

"Oh," he answered automatically, unsure what to make of it. "Really?"

"You go first". Her voice was firm and unyielding.

"Why?"

She spoke from her knees. "I don't want you to change your mind about telling me".

"As long as you don't change your mind about telling me, yeah".

"I won't". He believed her.

"Okay," he inhaled, pausing as though cradling a large bombshell. "I didn't leave the Akatsuki, Sakura. It was a necessary evil. I need to find out what the leader is planning. Especially now I know that Pein's not pulling the strings".

"Pein?"

"Something bigger is going on here. I think we're all being played for fools, yeah," he stared unseeing at the wooden floor, aware of the comforting weight of her arm around his waist. "It worries me".

He waited for the inevitable explosion.

"Deidara," she shook her head, taking his hand again in hers. "I think I already knew".

"How, yeah?"

She laughed at his perplexed expression.

"You always choose the most dangerous path," she traced the lines on his palm, smiling as the little mouth twitched under the skin. "You're not content on sitting back and letting others do the work. I want to fight alongside you-"

"But-"

"But," she placed a finger sadly over his protesting lips, "you said the one thing that could make me change my mind". She stared out of the window, her gaze flat as though she couldn't see the oak tree beyond it. "I don't want to be a liability," she admitted softly. "I can't allow you to get hurt because of me". Then she shook her head irritably. "I won't let you play that card again, Deidara," her tone was hard. "I will make sure that next time I am on a level with you. Then you'll have no choice but to take me with you".

He kissed her lightly on the lips, hiding his reservations. "We will see".

"So what did you want to tell me, yeah?"

Immediately, the atmosphere in the room shifted.

"You'll hate me".

"I won't," he promised. He watched her scrutinising stare, wishing that he could tell what she was thinking.

"Okay," she took a deep breath in an attempt to steady her voice. "My mind had long come to the conclusion that I would never see you again but my heart wouldn't accept it".

His heart clenched unbearably tight and he almost clutched it in surprise, unused to the sensation.

"And I'm sorry-"

"Please," she looked pained. "Don't interrupt me."

"Okay," he couldn't refuse her.

"I couldn't confide in anyone and was slowly losing touch with everything and everyone," she continued. "The night before I received your message, I had had an extremely trying day at work - I'd received a warning about my manner when speaking to patients - and wanted nothing more than to drown my sorrows. Preferably in something alcoholic. I ran into Kaito on the way out. He'd heard about my day and wanted to check up on me".

"Kaito?"

He hoped she couldn't discern the menace in his tone.

"I met him about six months after I arrived back home. I was horribly drunk at the time and accused him of coming on to me". She smiled sadly, remembering.

A sudden, unexpected flare of jealousy ignited in the pit of his stomach and he uncomfortably squashed it down. "Was he?" His hard tone caught her anxious gaze.

"No, I don't think so," she said wearily. "Much later, Ino told me he liked me. I never believed her. I wish I'd listened but I couldn't romanticise anyone other than you. You've ruined me for life," she smiled.

"So what happened, yeah?" His voice betrayed his emotions.

Her smile faltered.

"Kaito figured it out," she fiddled with the edge of the duvet nervously. Deidara suppressed his annoyance. The urge to snatch the cover from her delicate fingers was getting stronger. "He realised why I was acting so distant and cut off. He knew it was because of you".

"He knows about me?" Deidara barely hid his alarm. "Sakura-"

"No," she cut him off. "He doesn't know who you are. No one does".

"Anyway," she took a second breath as though willing herself to continue. "I was drunk," she confessed. "I was drunk and suddenly someone understood me for the first time in over a year. He offered to walk me home and I- I took advantage of him, Deidara. I'm so sorry. I'll understand if it's over for us".

For a moment he sat stunned. It was as though his heart had become a roiling mass of pain. With no small amount of effort he forced it down, amazed yet again at the power she had over him. The knife was blunted but it still hurt. _Don't let anyone see how much they have hurt you,_ his mother's voice echoed down through the years and for a brief instant he was six and in the family kitchen again, snuffling over the cuts and bruises he'd received at the hands of some older kids for being _different._ The vision faded away. He looked down at his hands and saw that they were shaking. He'd never been this angry. Never.

"Do you love him?" The words were out of his mouth before he was aware of even thinking them.

"What?" Sakura to her credit, looked surprised. "No. I love you, Deidara".

He ignored her admission, refusing to let her words to placate him.

"So let me get this straight," he said through shaking tones as he began to pace up and down. "You let yourself get drunk with this man who had feelings for you. You were unhappy, yeah. You'd had a tough day at work and you felt like no one understood you. This man, _Kaito_," he spat out the word as though it were venom, "what did he do when he found out you didn't want to be with him? You _did_ tell him?" His eyes narrowed.

"Of course I did," she replied, offended. "He's not my friend anymore, Deidara. He doesn't want anything to do with me. He said I played on his feelings. I used him". A tear glistened on her eyelash. "I'm a terrible person".

He stopped pacing, too angry for words. "That's bullshit. You were drunk. Who's to say he was too, yeah? He wanted this and he knew you were vulnerable. And now he is playing upon your emotions to guilt you into being with him," he growled.

"So where does this leave us?" She sounded afraid to ask. Her hands were trembling but for a very different reason to his. "I don't want to lie to you".

"I don't know," he admitted, hearing the blood pound in his ears. "I abandoned you for over a year. I prepared myself for the thought that you might have moved on. As much as I _hate_ the thought of you being with someone else, we were not together at the time. How can I take it out on you, yeah?" He winced as his fist connected with the door frame. "Technically you did nothing wrong. However, there's nothing to stop me taking it out on _him_".

"So you forgive me?" She sounded hopeful, hardly daring to believe it.

"I would be lying if I said I have," he said, his unforgiving tone confirming his words. "I don't want to talk about it, yeah". He slammed his fist into the wall. Plaster gathered like wood shavings on the floor, exposing a small dent in the wall. He had greater control over his anger these days, recognising it as a weakness in his character, but even he recognised that he was ready to snap.

He glanced at the bed. Her face was buried in her hands, framed by a curtain of hair. Her hunched figure caused her shoulder blades to jut out noticeably. The sight blunted his anger somewhat. How much of what had happened in Konoha did he know about, really? How much of what had happened to her since they last said goodbye was his fault? How much of it was hers? He exhaled deeply. Whatever else had happened, she had not lied to him. Was he going to risk her health deteriorating even further because they ended on a bad note?

He loved her. He had no choice but to forgive her, it was true. But he needed more time.

Sometimes people tell lies to protect those they love.

"I'm sorry," she repeated.

"I know," he answered, feeling his chest constrict. "I... I forgive you. You just caught me by surprise, yeah."

"Really?"

"I'll warn you that a requirement of me forgiving you is to exact a fitting punishment on _that man_, yeah," he growled.

"Don't," she almost smiled. Despite his effort, she wasn't completely fooled. She knew that some of his fury was directed at her too. Ignoring the roiling emotions in his stomach he regained control of his hands, not wanting to ruin the time they had left.

"I'm making no promises, yeah". A ghost of a smirk graced his features.

Already, he looked forward to that day.

* * *

**Three Days Later**

Her flat was exactly the way she'd left it. The bed lay unmade, half-washed dishes in the sink and the overflowing laundry basket was in dire need of attention. After spending endless months in squalor, the tiny flat resembled one of those make-over houses in which the occupants had no notion of the word clean. Sakura sighed. She hated it.

Her muddy bag dropped hit the carpet and she decided to tackle the most offending item first; her bed. As she ripped the sheets from the mattress, thoughts of Kaito came unbidden to the forefront of her mind. Feeling sick, she wished she could purge the images from her brain. The pile of bedding was thrown unceremoniously into the wash and she breathed evenly again as the machine started to spin, erasing the evidence of that night. As she leant against the chair at her tiny table, she took stock of her kitchen. It looked like a nuclear bomb had hit it; the only things still living were the insects.

Grimly she pulled on a pair of pink rubber gloves.

The sun was beginning to set when she finally collapsed onto her tiny sofa, feeling the effects of her extended cleaning spree. When did housework become so exhausting? Satisfied with her progress she closed her eyes, her arms cushioning her head against the settee. She had barely a minute to relax when a sharp, eager knock at the door roused her from her position. Typical. She hadn't been back a day and already someone knew about it.

"Sakura!" A large quantity of blond hair obscured her vision as Naruto hugged her enthusiastically.

"Get off me, you idiot," she forced him back with a chakra-enhanced hand, noticing Ino and Hinata standing a little ways behind him. "How did you know I was here?"

"Um, well". Naruto scratched the back of his head with a grin. "Neji saw you enter the village a few hours ago and mentioned it to Hinata. Is that bleach I smell?" He wrinkled his nose.

"I went a little overboard whilst cleaning," she shrugged, slightly embarrassed under her friends scrutiny. She couldn't remember the last time she'd seen her flat look so clean.

"We're going out for dinner tonight forehead," Ino said cheerfully. Sakura hoped she was imagining her friend's calculating stare. "Want to come?"

The refusal was upon the edge of her tongue when she remembered her promise to Deidara. No more hiding away. She swallowed, realising for the first time how much of a habit her unsociability had become. Besides, she owed it to them. They had never completely given up on her and she had no real reason to refuse other than being slightly fatigued from her trip.

"Why not?" She replied, lips quirked into a small smile. "It would be nice to catch up".

"Alright, see you at eight," Ino flicked her long hair, shooting a definitely curious glance at the pink-haired medic. "At Nizuni's".

"Okay".

"Don't be late, Haruno," Ino smirked. "See you later".

"Yeah," Naruto agreed. "Hey Sakura, what's been happening between you and-"

"Alright time to go," Ino took charge of the situation and Sakura shot her a grateful look.

"Bye then," Naruto waved, allowing himself to be pulled along by Ino. Hinata smiled briefly before following them silently up the street.

* * *

Nizuni's was unfamiliar to Sakura. A relatively new restaurant, or so she assumed. Such inconsequential changes to Konoha had held very little of her interest in the past year or so. It was bedecked with contemporary furnishings, cleverly arranged to incorporate traditional Japanese artefacts. Espying her friends at a table on the far side of the room she hastened to join them, feeling the inside of her clutch for the already familiar clay bird that nestled inside it. She was determined to keep all her promises.

"This is new," she remarked to the others as she sidled into her chair opposite Hinata. It didn't escape her notice that Naruto had elected to sit with the Hyuuga heiress. What else had she missed she reflected disconcertedly.

"Um," Hinata began hesitantly, pressing her index fingers together. "It- it has been here over a- a year, I think".

Naruto smiled gratifyingly at her, a few fingers resting lightly on her forearm. The dark-haired girl's cheeks turned a dark pink but she made no move to pull away from his touch. A few months ago Sakura's throat would have tightened inexplicably at this display of affection and would have excused herself from the table at the first opportunity. Now, she felt glad at her friends happiness marred only by her longing for such a simple, easy and open relationship.

"You are so out of it, forehead," Ino smirked, assaulting her with one of the beautifully arranged serviettes. "How could you not have noticed it was here? You walk past it every day".

Was it her imagination or was Ino referring to more than just the restaurant? The blonde was more astute than she gave her credit for. Sakura shrugged Ino's questions off and reached for a menu. "Are you planning on eating at all tonight Ino-pig? That is kind of the point, after all".

"Give me that," Ino snatched a second tasselled black menu off her friend and began to peruse it intently. "Don't think you can distract me," she hissed from behind the menu. Sakura smirked.

"I can try," she said simply, choosing at that moment to tune into Naruto's and Hinata's conversation.

"-train wi- with you tomorrow?" Hinata stuttered prettily as her fingers found the familiar v- shape that she was so practiced at forming.

"Only if you'll join me after at Ichiraku's," Naruto answered a heartbeat later, that carefree grin transforming his features. He leant back experimentally in his chair, utterly relaxed.

"Bu- but Naruto," she protested weakly. "M- my father, h- he says that I- Ichiraku's is for, u- um," she faltered stuttering worse than ever.

"I know, I know," he waved her words away dismissively, "we've been through this already. No Ichiraku's, no date".

"B- but training isn't a- a- date," she blushed again, eyes dropping to the table.

"Who says it isn't?" Naruto argued, eyes twinkling. "Do you have a problem with going on a date with me, Hinata?"

"U- Uh, no".

"Great," he grinned. Sakura could tell how hard he was trying to rein in his euphoria. "Tomorrow then".

"O-okay," Hinata smiled tentatively as he reached for her hand, lying innocuously on the table.

"I love watching those two," Ino commented in an undertone, wrenching Sakura from her thoughts. She realised that her stomach was clenched and cautiously relaxed her muscles. "It's like watching a drama but so much more satisfying".

Realising that Ino was expecting a reply, Sakura nodded. "He's fighting a losing battle," she jerked her thumb at her teammate. "She's got him wrapped around her little finger".

Almost by design, the waiter chose that moment to come and take their orders. Sakura ordered some Katsudon, a pork dish that looked very appetising. She noticed that Naruto and Hinata hadn't even looked at the menu before they ordered. Definitely not first timers, she concluded. Exactly how long had this been going on? She was tempted to ask Ino but was reluctant to reveal exactly _how_ out of it she had been.

"So what happened between you two," Ino asked in an undertone, halfway through dinner. Sakura glanced at the others, satisfied that they were too preoccupied to pay attention to their conversation.

"You mean myself and Kaito?" She whispered, feeling strangely conspiratorial. Ino nodded. "Don't remind me," the medic sighed, playing with the egg on her plate. "It was awful, Ino".

"I surmised as much," the blonde replied. "Kaito was in a towering temper the other day. I've never seen him like that before," she shook her head. "He wouldn't tell me anything".

"Really?" Her voice betrayed her surprise. "I thought he would have taken every opportunity to drive my name through the mud after our last conversation. He said he didn't want anything to do with me ever again".

"I don't think he meant it," Ino said wisely. "Anyway, the suspense is killing me. Do tell!"

"We didn't go home straightaway after work," Sakura sighed. "Against mine and his wishes, I got drunk. Stupidly drunk. Somehow, we ended up in bed together. It's the stupidest thing I've done," she moaned, placing her head in her hands.

"I knew it," Ino said triumphantly. Then noticing Sakura's discomfort, she placed a hand consolingly upon her shoulder. "Don't worry. We all do stupid things at times. He's a guy. He'll get over it".

Sakura nodded. "Thanks, Ino". She decided to move the subject into more comfortable quarters. "So tell me, anything interesting happened with you recently?"

"Well there was this one guy..."

Sakura let the words wash over her wondering about _her _guy, hoping that contrary to his nature, he was safe and out of harm's way.

* * *

The kunai cut through the air at blinding speed, hurtling towards Deidara's exposed head. He jerked it sideways almost at the last second and felt it nick his cheek as it whistled past. It embedded itself into the padded target on the wall opposite, striking bulls eye a fourth time. Kisame laughed, striding forwards to yank the metal projectiles out of the target.

"That was fucking close man," he smiled exposing rows of pointed teeth. The blonde shrugged.

"It was your idea, yeah. At those speeds you claimed it to be pretty much impossible. I am a walking contradiction to those claims," he smirked, pushing the blue-skinned shinobi away. "Are you going to let me finish my dinner or not, yeah?"

Kisame grunted something unintelligible and sloped off to join Itachi across the room. His ally never so much as glanced his way. Deidara was practised enough to do the same. Whilst at the base Itachi was indifferent and Deidara used every opportunity to display his hatred for the sharingan-user. Suspicion was easily aroused amongst the Akatsuki and for good reason. None of them would ever have made it this far if they had been of a trusting, friendly sort.

He unconsciously wiped the blood from his cheek, the superficial wound already clotting. It had barely stung and was already forgotten. He finished the rest of his meal in silence and left in search of his room.

A dark shape leant casually against the wall preceding the final corner. Red eyes glinted from beneath a dark fringe.

"Itachi". Deidara said flatly.

"Leader is planning something. Something big," Itachi spoke in dry tones, his sharingan activated, searching for any signs that they were not alone. "It has something to do with the nine-tales".

His gut clenched uncomfortably. "You are sure?"

"Positive". Itachi's eyes gleamed. "If you don't want your pretty little girlfriend to get caught in the crossfire, I suggest you find out what it is soon".

"I thought you didn't care about that, yeah" Deidara shot back at him.

"I don't," he replied smoothly. "What I do care about is your ability to perform to the best of your ability in battle. At least you had the sense to listen to me last time".

"Don't patronise me, Itachi," he growled, fists involuntarily clenched. "I know what needs to be done".

"I trust you won't forget it". The Uchiha swept past him and vanished around the corner.

Deidara stared after him, fuming. Unbidden, an image of Sakura leapt to the forefront of his mind. It seemed that no matter what he did, he couldn't protect her from everything. That didn't stop him from trying though.

* * *

**Four Weeks Later**

_"Sakura..."_

_The echoes magnified the distant voice causing her name to be whispered over and over._

_"Sakura, Sakura, Sakura..."_

_"Deidara?" She could pick out his voice from within a crowd with ease. The sound of it was second nature to her. "Where are you?" She called ignoring the frantic beat of her heart._

_Darkness closed in on her and she squinted in vain. She could discern nothing. Her footsteps echoed eerily in the gloom as though bouncing off unseen walls. Strange shapes shifted at the edge of her vision. When she got closer, they vanished._

_"Deidara?" She tried to fight down her rising panic, practising the breathing exercises her shishou taught her long ago. He was here. She could sense it. But where was here exactly?_

_"I'm here," a weak voice sounded to her left, straining to make itself heard despite the place being deadly quiet._

_"Deidara!" She ran to the shadowy prone shape on the ground, holding his icy hand in hers. She reached for her chakra but it wasn't there. "It's alright," she smoothed back his hair, fighting to hold her emotions in check. "I'm here now. You'll be fine"._

_His blood-coated lips worked hard to form the words as his hand gripped hers tightly. "You... you must go, yeah," he wheezed, fighting back the urge to cough up more blood. "You ca.. can't stay, Sakura"._

_"I won't leave you," she promised._

_His eyes widened, staring at something two feet above her head. "Go, now!" he commanded, yanking his hand from hers in a sudden burst of strength._

_Instinctively she spun around. A black shape with purple ringed eyes was advancing upon her. She froze, deaf to Deidara's weak pleas._

_She was going to die._

Sakura awoke, sweaty and shaking. She glanced over at her illuminated bedside clock, just about able to make out the time through bleary eyes: 10AM. She pushed her limp hair out of her eyes with sweaty fingers, groaning. The dream still played on her mind.

Grumbling to herself, she stumbled out of bed grabbing the first item of clothing in reach. Her medic's uniform. "Oh shit," she muttered as everything clicked into place. She was late for work.

As she reached out for the uniform, a sudden unexpected burst of chakra caused her to drop the clothing as though being burnt. Without thinking, she flew to the window and leaned dangerously far over the frame, scanning the area. A few streets away several shinobi ran past, shouting something unintelligible on the wind.

Her head nearly struck the wooden frame as another burst of chakra erupted a short way outside the village and she gasped as a barrier formed around the village, protecting it from an unknown intruder. She raced across her room and began to dress in her combat gear, practised hands checking that her equipment pouches were full and that her medical gear was to hand. As an afterthought she picked up the clay bird Deidara had given her and her soldier pills. Unfortunately she hadn't had much time to improve the flavour. It was lucky that Naruto had just got back from training with the frogs. She knew he would have been sorely missed.

Running across the rooftops to join the medics, she wondered who it could be. Deidara would have warned her if it was the Akatsuki, wouldn't he? Whoever it was, she surmised, they were fools to attack one of the greatest villages in the land.

Boom!

A building collapsed half a mile away where the fighting was most intense. _How had they gotten through the barrier? _She swallowed a pill, waking her up more effectively than a cold shower. Suddenly her senses twitched and she veered to the left, almost skidding off the roof. One hand clung bravely to the gutter, saving her from a fall. She swung up back onto the tiles using her chakra-enhanced strength. An insect, three stories high was waiting for her. The buildings groaned under its weight. Without warning, it lunged. She dodged, jumped to a nearby roof and off again, using her momentum to propel her towards the centipede at high speeds. Her chakra-laden punch connected with the side of its head just as its tail whipped up to slam her against a wall. It cracked in several places.

Dazed, Sakura rose unsteadily to her feet and glanced up at the buildings, shading her eyes from the sun. The insect had vanished. Alarmed, she scanned the other buildings for signs of movement. There were none.

A faint curious rumble beneath her feet was her only warning. She jumped to the side as the insect erupted from the earth, catching her leg with its overgrown pincers. Stifling a cry of pain, she directed some of her chakra into healing the wound, grateful for Deidara's lessons on sensory earth jutsu. The orange and back centipede was circling for another attack and she knew her time was up.

Boldly she lunged at the creature and twisted away at the last second. The creatures counterattack missed by inches as its gaping maw pummelled the earth. Taking advantage of its momentary confusion, Sakura placed a well-laden chakra fist straight through its body, severing its head. Disgusted by her now filthy clothing Sakura leapt onto the roof and continued on, shuddering as she swallowed another pill for good measure.

Unbeknownst to her, the bird in her pocket twitched. The solitary eye peeking out from underneath the flap of one of her pouches blinked.

* * *

"Fuck," Deidara cursed, footsteps echoing off the walls as he reached his maximum speed short of running. "Fuck".

He was armed only with his usual stock of clay and essential weapons. The unpacked mission bag at the foot of his bed niggled away at his brain as he made for the exit, encountering no one. Foolish, hot-headed, impulsive. He no longer cared. The unfamiliar rooftops of Konoha sped past in his mind's eye, the sound of her laboured breathing impossibly loud in his ear. Acutely aware that he had played a part in her returning home, he ground his teeth together. Fate was playing a very cruel joke.

"Where are you off to so early?" Kisame ambled out of the kitchen, eyes bloodshot, reeking of alcohol amongst other things. "You look fucked. Girl a bad lay?" His grin was razor sharp.

"Fuck off, Kisame," Deidara growled, pushing him aside.

"Or was it you?" His eyes glinted maliciously. "Come to think of it, I haven't seen a girl enter your room in a long time. Perhaps your interests lie elsewhere," he smirked. "I always wondered why you never cut your pussy-coloured hair".

"You only wish I was. Difference between me and you Kisame, is that I don't have to try to get some pussy, yeah," Deidara's retort came out as a statement, his mind focused upon a pink-haired kunoichi engaging in battle with five other shinobi against a gigantic three-headed looking dog. Kisame's angry reply was a distant noise in his ear as he continued his solitary path down the corridor, knowing that no matter what, Sakura was beyond his aid.

* * *

The earth-made cage crumbled as the dog reared its ugly heads, eyes rolling madly. Sakura's knees gave way to exhaustion as she released the seal. Moments later the other two shinobi that had been supporting her justu followed.

"It's too strong," Sakura informed the others. "We can't overcome it by brute strength alone".

She watched impotently as the remaining three shinobi - their physical attack force - slammed into the building behind them. One juddered and fell still. Sakura eyed the brute's paws apprehensively. Unfortunately it was not the only deadly weapon in the dog's arsenal. A deafening bark emitted from behind their shelter causing Sakura to cover her ears with a yelp of pain. Spinning on the spot in her crouched position, she noticed the others motioning to her.

"Our best chance is to confuse it," the leader's voice could barely be heard over the thunderous growls. "That leaves Shigeru free to deliver a fatal blow to the back of its neck". Shigeru smiled grimly as he shouldered his katana, a line of blood trickling down his forehead.

"Consider it done".

It was not that simple. The three heads gave the dog an unusually broad scope for vision. The only true way to remain undetected was to approach the beast from directly behind, quietly. Its hearing was just as keen. All things considered, Shigeru was doing remarkably well, Sakura mused as she dodged a fatal swipe from the animal's paws. A great glob of saliva trickled down her neck and onto her back. So focused was she on remaining alive that she didn't have the capacity to be revolted by it. Unfortunately, one of her teammates was not so lucky. A two tonne paw pinned him to the pavement, sharp teeth hovering dangerously over his head. The stench of its breath was overpowering as the medic inched closer and aimed a chakra-enhanced fist at its jugular. The sinewy skin rippled at her touch and she fell back in surprise. A moment later, Sakura flinched as the man's screams were cut off abruptly.

"We need to close in on it!" The leader's shouts came from the left. Hearing his shout, the dog rounded on him. Glancing upwards, Sakura could see a shape perched on the rooftop behind the creature, silhouetted against the morning sun. Metal glinted on his back. _Smart_, she thought with satisfaction. The brute would never see it coming. Now to give him an opportunity to strike.

With a great burst of speed she reached the front forelegs, wider than any tree trunk. A well-placed blow at the knee joint caused it to stumble. Instinctively she rolled to the side, missing the sharp canine teeth by inches. The deep growls emitting from its chest were deafening. Another jab to the paw and the dog reflexively jerked backwards. She smiled grimly. The force of a battering ram hit her side and she felt her ribs crack under the strain as she was shoved from the fight towards a dilapidated old building. What little air that was left in her lungs was expelled forcefully as her back smashed against the flimsy door. It burst open and she sailed on towards the back wall. Eyes screwed tightly against the pain, she never saw the clay bird fall out of her pocket.

A great bellowing, screeching sound heralded the end of the world as it crashed down around her and everything went black.

Sixty miles away Deidara sank to his knees, fingers gouging out handfuls of clay as sudden blinding pain consumed him. Unaware of his surroundings, it was only pure instinct that stopped the bird from plummeting to the earth. The great wings that flapped on either side of him, rocking the body to and thro were not registered by his shocked senses. His mind reeled as he fought the intense weight on his chest.

He had failed.

Sakura was... gone.


	20. The Point of No Return

**A/N:** Wow, pretty impressed that I've updated twice in less than a month! This chapter is shorter than I planned only because I decided that the chapter ended more naturally at the point I've chosen. Thanks to everyone who reviewed. It was your encouragement that helped me to write this chapter. Hopefully I've done it justice. Took me a couple of days to figure out who's point of view I was going to start with as the cliffhanger had to be addressed right. I'd love to hear your thoughts!

**Disclaimer:** As you know I do not own any part of Naruto.

* * *

**Chapter 20: The Point of No Return**

* * *

Rubble crunched ominously beneath her boots, echoing off the few walls that were fortunate enough to remain standing. The once bright colours of Konoha were submerged beneath a fine coating of dirt. The cheerful buildings slouched, abused and weary in the aftermath of the attack. Lively streets were replaced by wandering litter-strewn paths; the broken houses acutely reminded her of cracked teeth or gravestones. She suppressed a shiver.

Not for the first time she questioned the wisdom of her venture.

The going was slow. She was forced to scramble over rickety piles of waste and skirt wicked-looking metal poles that obstructed her path. A couple of times she stopped to take stock of her bearings. A lifetime of traversing these streets was little help to her now. The village had taken a devastating blow. Briefly closing her eyes, images from the fight and the aftermath jumped vividly into focus. She shook her head. The wild unrestrained joy she had felt at winning was tempered by the destruction that sprawled before her. Miles upon miles of it. From where she stood it was hard to imagine that Konoha would ever recover. They had lost so much. A wave of grief caused her throat to tighten and she shoved it angrily away. This was difficult enough.

It took at least thrice the normal time to reach her destination. Almost all the markers that announced which street she was on rested underneath a pile of debris. It was only the old gnarled tree, incredibly unharmed, that informed her that her journey was almost at an end. Halting outside a building in a similar state to those around it, she examined its sorry state. A brightly painted green shop sign hung lopsidedly over the open doorway. Despite that half of the sign remained - the rest had turned to scattered fragments upon the floor - and that the brick dust rendered the writing almost illegible, she recognised the shop where she had spent half her childhood cutting, arranging and selling its beautiful flowers. Ducking under the fragile doorframe, Ino entered the pathetic husk of her mother's flower shop breathing in slowly, as though her lungs could inhale the sweet scent of her childhood and keep the faded smell locked inside her forever. Unwittingly she inhaled a mouthful of dust instead.

Once her coughs subsided, she edged further into the store taking care not to disturb the thick coating of dirt and grime that smothered the floor. Her keen eye spied under the counter the head of a purple flower turned grey from the filth, the shattered remains of its pot encircling it. She didn't need to examine it to know that it was an Ayame, a purple iris. She knew the plants that grew in her mother's store like the back of her hand. From the age of five, she had known more about flowers than most avid gardeners. Her parents had never wanted her to pursue her chosen career. The old argument came back to haunt her in the stillness of the small shop. She sighed deeply and turned to leave. A small yellow Tsubaki nested in the corner, miraculously unharmed.

"Oh it's a miracle alright," Ino remarked drily, picking up the small pot and brushing the brick dust from its delicate petals. She left the shop, shaking her head disbelievingly.

Twenty minutes later she reached the edge of the devastation. Dirty, hazardous streets turned smoothly into grass. She'd reached the temporary village. A hundred or more green tents were pitched alongside the forest; a provisional refuge for the homeless. It mostly consisted of shinobi who'd stepped aside to allow the civilians a sense of normality and to begin rebuilding their livelihoods. Tenzou had constructed several houses himself for this purpose. However, being only one man, he could only do so much. In the distance Ino could hear the sound of hammers and saws. The civilian builders were relying on more mundane alternatives for construction. As progress was slow, it fell to people like Ino to relocate to the tents. Having spent a lifetime under a canvas roof Ino hardly noticed the change, exempting the use of electricity. She walked slowly through the rows of tents, hand still clasped tightly around her mother's flowerpot. A couple of pink wellies standing sentinel outside a green tent distinguished it from the others. As she approached it two voices sounded within, causing her to halt her progression.

"-have died!"

"Well I didn't," a familiar voice protested. Ino had no trouble in identifying the sound of her best friend. "Anyway it wouldn't have mattered even if I had. Everyone came back didn't they? I don't get what your problem is".

Ino shook her head as she ducked under the flap in time to see Sakura sink deeper into the bed, arms crossed, lips pouted. Her visitor turned at the intrusion, wearing an exasperated expression. Ino shot him a sympathetic smile.

"If you had been where you were supposed to be we wouldn't be having this conversation right now," Naruto shook his head, his blond hair catching in the sunlight through the gap in the tent.

"Oh don't start on that one," Sakura replied crankily. "I've already had enough of that from Tsunade-sama". She winced as she positioned herself against the metal bedpost nearest the canvas backdrop.

"He's right you know, forehead," Ino said casually, wondering why she'd bothered to open her mouth as she was not in the mood to indulge Sakura right now. Her friend had a tendency to assume that she had the worst deal. Not true, Ino wanted to tell her. She remembered the flower shop. Years of cultivating the best flowers in Konoha, obliterated in an instant.

"Whatever," Sakura sighed, hand unconsciously going to her side. Apparently, she wasn't in the mood to play either. Good.

"Sakura". The medic appeared surprised at finding Naruto's hand in hers. The crystal blue eyes locked her firmly in place. "I've already lost one best friend. I don't want to lose another".

Then he was gone. The tent flap flopped uselessly behind him.

"Yeah I'm such a great friend," Sakura retorted sarcastically, stepping gingerly onto the grassy carpet, one hand glued to her side. "I still haven't thanked him for what he did".

Ino decided not to grace that comment with a reply.

"Come on, forehead," she led the pink-haired medic from the tent, waiting patiently as she fumbled with the zip on her boots. "There should still be some food left over from breakfast in the mess hall". The mess hall was in fact a field amidst the tents comprising of wooden benches and a portable kitchen. "You look like you could do with some fuel".

* * *

Perched silently in a tree, he could barely make out the sea of tents that extended in every direction. Due a mile east, it was easily detectable to an experienced shinobi. The lack of wildlife and the greater concentration of patrols as he neared its position were evidence enough. A hidden stream gurgled nearby interrupting his chaotic, disjointed thoughts.

Reckless.

Foolish.

Impulsive.

Deidara was all of these things and more. Sakura's last moments were on silent replay behind his eyes. Again he saw her lifeless body slumped against the back wall like a cracked and broken porcelain doll. The blood trickled from her mouth, staining her cheek with its sickly, red trail. As if following her lead, cracks began to form in the brickwork behind her, a spider web pattern of fissures with his medic at the epicentre. The building creaked and groaned like an animal in its death throes and then with a heart-stopping rumble, his world ended in brick and dust.

What would he achieve by coming here he asked himself for the eleventh time. Was it retribution or closure that had drawn him to her homeland? Pein was dead he had learned from a passing patrol lax in the censoring of their tongues. He could have turned back then. Why he didn't was unfathomable even to himself. Robbed of his foe, his tortured, frenzied mind turned to others culpable for his loss. The shinobi of Konoha. Those who trained her well in devoting herself to the village, who taught her to place the lives of its citizens over her own. It would be a betrayal of everything she had stood for, of what she had died still trying to protect. To commit such an act would surely be to desecrate her memory yet the strategy appealed to his darker nature. The urge to spill blood, to unleash his grief and anguish upon someone even partly responsible warred against his self-preservation.

_To take on this village is suicide, yeah. Not even Pein could do it and he fashioned himself as a God._

What frightened him most was his complete inability to care. There were no consequences.

The branches creaked as a light breeze caught them. Deidara's gaze was drawn once more to the tents beyond the tree-line. The knowledge that Sakura had returned home to appease him lay in the blackest recesses of his mind. To touch upon it would be to experience true madness. Out of the little self-preservation he had left, his mind instinctively shied away from such conflict. Unbidden an image of her leapt into his mind.

_So you forgive me?_

_I'd be lying if I said I have._

Her pale, wide-eyed face shimmered in front of him. She was not smiling. Her cerise lips were parted slightly in surprise, matching silky locks framed her face in waves, curling just above her breasts. The green eyes bespoke a pain easily dwarfed by his own. He ground his teeth in agitation. His chest constricted painfully causing his breathing to turn ragged. The branch groaned in protest as a hand squeezed it like a boa constrictor wraps around its prey. He hardly noticed.

_Damn you Sakura for leaving me_, he growled inwardly. The branch emitted a sharp snapping sound as it was wrenched in two. _I'll never-_

A flash of pink streaked across his vision. The branch plummeted to the floor as the fingers containing them slipped. It was very plausible that his imagination had just been playing tricks on him. He'd just been thinking about her after all. Yet that didn't stop him from abandoning his post and sliding smoothly to the grassy floor.

It was near the stream that he found her. A cluster of ash trees encircled the grove, shading the woman along its banks. She had her back turned, long pink hair cascading to below her shoulder blades, her naked torso was a sea of bandages. His grip tightened on the kunai in his left hand, unable to recall how it got there. Sensing that she was not alone the girl turned around, hands crossed protectively across her breasts.

"Deidara". Delight and surprise mingled her tone. She made to move towards him.

"Stop". His voice was harsher than he'd intended. She stumbled to a halt, eyes fixed warily upon the weapon poised in his hand. There were only two explanations for this: he had finally gone blissfully, utterly mad or this was a powerful, seamlessly executed genjutsu designed to incapacitate and successfully neutralise him. The latter seemed more probable. "Don't come any closer".

"Deidara, what-?" Her green eyes widened in confusion.

"You died, Sakura" he said shakily, hating his turbulent emotions for betraying his weakness. "I saw you die". He aimed his kunai at her head. "This is not real. You can't be here".

"Is that why you're here?" Her brow furrowed in confusion. "Deidara, I didn't die. None of us did. The casualties of that fight numbered one. Pein".

"Bullshit," he growled. "I saw one of your teammates die when you were fighting that mutt. More to the point, I saw you die. So don't fucking tell me that what I saw was a lie. I'm not screwing around, yeah".

He was breathing like a winded rhinoceros, anger ran like wildfire through his veins. He knew he should attack but struggled to hurt the beautiful, concerned young medic even if she was just an illusion.

"I'm not either". Her tone was sharp, commanding. "Pein used some kind of resurrection jutsu at the cost of his own life". Interpreting his silence as acquiescence, she continued. "All who died that day were revived. I don't know why he changed his mind. Naruto has that effect on people; the way he makes them believe in him..." she trailed off. "Regardless, I did not die during the fight, Deidara. I was attacked by a vicious man-eating dog and was buried under debris over a story high but I did not die," she finished fiercely. "I don't know where you get your sources from but they are severely lacking".

Deidara stared transfixed at the vision before him. Irrationally, he wanted to close the distance between them and feel her in his arms once more.

"How do I know you're telling the truth?" he replied, steadying his grip on the cool metal handle of his kunai. "Telling me what I want to hear sounds like a pretty good way to lull me into a false sense of security, yeah".

"Think about what you are saying, Deidara," Sakura sighed, pushing her unruly fringe from her eyes. Her hands lay loosely at her sides, permitting an unrestricted view of her bandaged torso. Irritated that for a brief second his eyes had flickered downwards, he forced himself to refocus on her face. "You're assuming that others know about us, enabling this scenario that you've convinced yourself is happening to occur. I have not shared our relationship with anybody," she fixed him with a steely gaze, showing how deadly serious she was. "Last of all," she said, slowly closing the gap between them. That she favoured her left side and that her right hand was pressed against her torso did not escape his notice. "When I'm around you, all logic and reason cease to exist. I would drop everything for you". She was so close that he could smell her lemon-scented shampoo. "I would think nothing of risking my life for you".

When their lips touched, Deidara no longer cared whether she was an illusion or not. His lips melded with hers, a possessive edge taking over as the kiss became more demanding. A spark had ignited inside the couple and neither had the will or inclination to bring an end to the addictive, passionate kisses. She was like oxygen to him, integral to his survival.

After several prolonged minutes they broke apart, their breathing heavily affected and lips swollen. She remained in his arms as he marvelled in the feel of her skin against his. Something that until moments ago, he'd never have thought was possible again.

"I can't leave you again," he broke the silence, looking down at the young, fragile medic in his arms. "It was my fault that you were here. I-"

"Shh," she silenced him with a single finger to the lips. "It's okay. We're both okay".

He nodded, ignoring the uncomfortable sensation in his throat. His gaze remained locked with hers, taking in every single aspect of her face incapable of glancing away. The tension spiked a second time and unable to contain themselves for much longer, their lips brushed a second time.

The nearby bushes offered a further role that day: concealment.

* * *

"It's not too late to change your mind".

Sakura pinned him with her vivid green eyes, unaware of the dangerous effect that they had on him. That one look told her everything she needed.

"I know what you're trying to do". She released him from her piercing gaze and continued to cram the small pack with the necessary supplies. It had been a cinch to enter the camp again and stash her pack full of weapons and medical supplies from the open storage buildings. It had gone without a hitch. Well, almost. Everything had gone according to plan until she had returned to her tent to collect some spare clothing. She set back on her knees and shot a playful smirk at her lover and fellow conspirator. "You're stuck with me for good now".

She rolled up the final item and placed it neatly into the top of pack.

"All done". She held out her hand and allowed herself to be pulled to her feet. Dusting off a few stray blades of grass she hoisted the pack on one shoulder with a forced smile. "Come on Deidara, we've already tried it your way. It's time to try mine. Besides, you were the one who said you couldn't leave me again".

"I don't know if we're making the right decision, yeah," he spoke to the mountains ahead. "What if it's too much for you to handle?"

"You let me worry about that," Sakura retorted, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. "I didn't make this decision lightly. I'm giving up my whole world for this".

"I know," he sighed. "I didn't mean to belittle your sacrifice".

"Come on," Sakura smiled sadly. "There's still one thing we need to do before we set off".

The walk took little over twenty minutes without chakra and following Deidara's instructions on skirting the patrols. When they broke through the trees and stepped out into the brilliant sunlight, Sakura knew the risk had been worth it. Sprawled haphazardly below them lay the desolation of Konoha. Atop the famous Hokage Monument, Sakura and Deidara had an unobstructed view of her hometown. The sight stiffened her resolve. This was what she was fighting for; her home, the citizens of Konoha and all the other villages that risked dismemberment from the likes of the Akatsuki. It was a crying shame that Deidara's first impression of it would always be a smoking ruin. His hand found hers and gave it an encouraging squeeze.

"Thanks," she mouthed as she silently said farewell to the village. There would be no farewell for her friends, no explanation of where she was going. She would simply vanish into the midday sun. It was probably better that way she realised, remembering the awkward encounter with Kaito outside her tent.

_"Sakura!" His voice was tinged with relief. "I'm glad I bumped into you"._

Came looking for me more like_, Sakura amended silently, knowing perfectly well that Kaito had no other reason for being in this section of the camp._

_"It's been a while," she answered quietly, hoping that the exchange would be brief. She didn't want to make Deidara wait too long in case he decided to take action. He seemed more overprotective than usual. Clearly the thought of losing her again was playing heavily on his mind._

_Kaito sighed deeply, running his fingers through his dark brown hair. "I've been a complete ass, Sakura. When I heard what you went through in the attack, how close you came to death, I felt terrible"._

_"We all stared death in the face that day," Sakura replied as she started to walk away._

_"Sakura, wait," his sudden grip upon her wrist brought her to an unexpected halt. "Please, let me apologise to you". She couldn't look him in the face. "I'm sorry for what I said. It was out of order"._

_"It's okay Kai-"_

_"No it's not," he disagreed. "Let me take you out for a coffee on Thursday to properly apologise. The cafe should be properly open by then"._

_"I," she stalled, at a loss for what to say. His pleading eyes prevented her from giving him a flat out no. "I'll have to think about it"._

_She knew of course that the coffee morning would never be anything more than a pipe dream._

"We can't linger here any longer, Deidara," she sighed. "Someone might spot us".

"Are you sure?" Despite the risk, she knew that he would stay atop the monument as long as it took for her to be ready. Once they stepped off the bare rock that signified Konoha's history, there was no going back. The decision to forfeit her status as a Konoha citizen and become a missing-nin was acutely painful. The thought of her beloved village hunting her down like an animal cut her to the core. Imagining her friends and loved ones being part of that man-hunt was more than she could bear.

"I'm sure," she nodded firmly, pushing the hollow feeling aside as she walked purposefully away from the edge. Deidara's hand remained entwined with hers, his face taut with emotion as he led her away from the place she loved most. Her silent tears were the only indication of her distress.

It was in that moment that the realisation hit her. She was just like him. All they had now were each other.

* * *

_Hope this cliffhanger is not as evil as the last one! What do you think will happen next? I will enjoy reading your theories and opinions on the chapter!_


End file.
